Came to Dance
by lifewillout-always
Summary: AU Grey's Anatomy: Meredith is a brand new 18 year old corps de ballet member of Pacific Northwest Ballet. What happens when she walks in on her first day and meets the gang? And what happens when, one day, she's thrown on stage in a stroke of luck in a principal dancers role? MerDer. (Includes all Grey's characters; feel free to ask about ballet terms!)
1. Overture

Meredith Grey stood outside the imposing doors that led to the Pacific Northwest Ballet. Everything she had worked for and trained for her entire life stood beyond those doors and had led her towards this moment. For her entire life she had ascended through classes and the pre-professional program at the Royal Ballet School, taking correspondence classes through an elite private school in Boston, her mother harping on her to be the best she could be. That was easy for her mother to say; she was Head Ballet Mistress at the Royal Ballet School. When 13 year old Meredith had told her mother she wanted to dance professionally like her mother, her Ellis had simply sighed and continued signing her expensive tuition checks. As long as she didn't bring shame to the name Grey and she stayed out of her mother's way, Meredith could do whatever the hell she wanted.

That was why Meredith found herself staring at the doors of PNB, her hair pulled back in a tight bun, a light September Seattle rain falling around her. She had moved here less than a week ago, settling into the old house that she'd lived in, once upon a dream it seemed. Everything had been covered in dust and she'd managed to clean it up a bit to the tune of Tchaikovsky, an old friend of Nutcracker's past. She was 18 years old and, after an apprenticeship with the Royal Ballet, had decided to move clear across the world from her mother because she had to have the best, and the best had offered her a corps position in their ballet company. That and, well, she wanted to be clear across the world from her mother.

Finally she mustered up enough courage to enter the building, following signs to the women's changing room. She was intimidated like crazy as she walked into the room and everyone's gaze focused on her. She blushed timidly and ducked her head, moving to a corner as she dropped her bag and took off her coat, stripping off her clothes and pulling on an old, ragged pair of pink tights and a lavender leotard, piling on a black wrap sweater and her trusty pair of black trash bag pants, tying a skirt around her waist. Dirty ballet slippers went on her feet with down-filled booties on top before she turned herself around, deeming herself ready for class. Once she had turned around she saw a tall, bubbly blonde heading for her.

"Hi!" she chirped, holding out her hand. "I'm Izzie, I'm one of the corps girls," she said with a wide smile. Meredith timidly took her hand, trying to match her smile. "Meredith," she managed to say, before dropping her hand and tucking a piece of hair back into her bun. The girl was tall and thin, lithe and beautiful. Meredith was a bit shorter, thinner, but of course the stakes were high for all of them. They were in the corps de ballet, the most expendable dancers in the company. "I just came as an apprentice from The Royal Ballet," Meredith said shyly, knowing that her words had meaning. An Asian girl in the corner stood up as she pulled her hair back. "If you were with The Royal why the hell did you come here?" she questioned. Meredith toyed with the laces on her skirt before stretching out her leg against the wall. "I wanted the best," she said simply, before grabbing her pointe shoes and bottle of water and leaving the room for the dance studio.

She wasn't quite sure if there was a hierarchy at the barre, so she held back and watched people file in. It seemed that the older principal dancers took the barre by the windows, soloists against the back wall, and the corps dancers took the wall opposite the windows. Meredith filed in and quickly took a spot, preparing herself for class. Looking over to the barre at the mirrors, she noticed two older men and a very tall red headed woman, seemingly joking around. She knew exactly who they were, having studied who was who in the company. Derek Shepherd, Mark Sloan, and Addison Montgomery. Addison was basically a legend, having become a principal ballerina when she was only 23. She was now nearly 27 and was as amazing as ever. The dark haired man, Derek, suddenly turned and looked right her, offering her a smile, which in turn made Meredith blush and suddenly become very involved in making sure that her leotard was on right.

Suddenly she felt the straps of her leotard snap against her skin and she scowled, turning around. It was the Asian girl, who looked to be around her age. "What the hell was that for!?" she hissed, glaring at her. "I'm Cristina and I know exactly who you are. You were scouted by American Ballet Theater, San Francisco Ballet, AND New York City Ballet. You've won top prize at Youth America Grand Prix and Prix de Lausanne more than once. Your mother is head of The Royal Ballet. Why did you choose here?" she questioned her. Meredith spun around and bit her lip. "Haven't you ever wanted an escape from your everything you've known?" she asked, raising an eyebrow as she crossed her arms in front of her. "Besides, this is a world class ballet company, anyone would kill to dance here," she stated. Before she whirled back around, she offered a small smile. "And my name is Meredith, but I'm sure you know that already," she teased, straightening herself up as she turned around, ready for warm up.

* * *

After an intense but invigorating barre, the women took a few minutes to put on their pointe shoes for center work. Meredith sat on the floor with a new pair of pointe shoes, knowing they'd be dead by the end of the day. Once she was confident they were broken in enough for her strong foot and arch, she tied the ribbons and stood up, shedding the trash bag pants and cropped sweater; she was sweating buckets anyway and they were no longer needed. Standing up, she tested the strength of her shoes before taking a place in the center of the room. Again, Derek caught her eye and again, she shifted her gaze elsewhere. How the hell had she managed to catch the eye of a principal dancer, not to mention Derek Shepherd, on her first day in the company!? She had just turned 18 and he was in his late 20's. Rolling her neck and popping her joints, she sprung into position for the adagio, slowly lifting her leg to her ear and holding it there to the counts of the music.

After adagios and petite allegros, after grande jeteing across the floor to her hearts content, after jumping and beating, bourreing and pirouetting, class was over. Meredith had survived her first class with the company. Next came pas de deux, where she was paired up with some guy named George. He quickly found her and introduced himself. "Hi, um, I'm George, you must be the new girl Meredith." "What gave you that impression, that I was the new girl?" she smirked, as she practiced her fouettes. 32 without stopping, she grinned to herself, adding some doubles in there. She stopped when one of the ballet mistresses, Mistress Bailey, walked into the room and began to instruct the corps de ballet on the Grand Pas from Swan Lake. Meredith was no stranger to partnering; she had started when she was 13, but partnering with this guy…was pure hell. He was sweaty and kept fumbling her, letting her slip from his hands when he was supposed to be holding her above his head gracefully. _How the hell did he get into this company?_ She thought bitterly, glaring at him for about the tenth time. As he nearly dropped her again when she was in a fish dive, her face missing the floor by mere centimeters, saving herself only because of her quickly moving arms, she looked up at him with disgust. "Ugh, have you ever partnered before?" she said, standing up straight and dusting herself off. Fortunately the class was over and she snatched her water bottle, walking out of the room to view the rehearsal schedule for the fall season.

She finally made her way to the front of the crowd at the bulletin board where the rehearsal list was posted, and she smiled. She was called to rehearse Serenade, several corps roles in Swan Lake, and several in Coppelia. She smiled to herself; luckily for her she knew most of the roles already and just needed to practice them before she was stage ready. Heading back into studio she grabbed the towel she had placed at the barre, wiping herself down before heading to the center again for rehearsal. This time, ballet master Webber would be teaching them choreography. She paled slightly and balked; she knew him from her childhood and from England. He had been her teacher before he came to Seattle to take up the position of head of Pacific Northwest. She didn't dare go closer to him; she wasn't here for favoritism, she was here to dance and show them what she was made of.

She was thrown together with Izzie and Cristina, along with a girl named April who was overly peppy despite the nearly four hours of dancing they'd already done today, and were told to keep warm at the barre while Webber worked with the principal dancers. Meredith watched Addison Montgomery with awe; she was the epitome of beauty and grace. Her pointe work was flawless, especially as she leaned into a deep penche, her legs a complete 180 degrees. "She's flawless," Meredith whispered to Cristina, who nodded back. "Look at that, her ankle isn't even wavering," she said, shaking her head a bit, her eyes glued to her. In that moment Meredith didn't feel like the girl who had had ballet companies running after her; she felt small and expendable like the corps de ballet dancer she truly was. "She's gorgeous, AND she's dating Derek Shepherd," Izzie said, wiping her sweaty face on her arm, sighing. _If he's dating her, why the hell does he keep looking at me?_ Meredith wondered, keeping an eye on the couple, who were working on the Grand Pas of Swan Lake together. They made the intricate work looked completely effortless, but Meredith knew better. She couldn't help but notice the jealous looks being thrown their direction by Mark, and she bit her lip, wondering what was going on with that.

* * *

There was no show that night; the first show was in two weeks, and they had a lot of work to prepare for it. Meredith was gathering her things from underneath the barre when she felt a shadow above her. She looked up from the already ragged toes of her pointe shoes to meet the dark blue eyes of Derek Shepherd. She grew shy but managed a smile as he held out a hand. What was with everyone and shaking hands? "Hi, I'm Derek, but you probably already knew that. Just like I know you're Meredith." She blushed a bit but took his hand. "Hi Derek…yes…I'm Meredith," she said stupidly, cringing slightly. She was barely 18 years old, navigating a new ballet company, and one of it's prized stars had been eyeing her all day and was now introducing himself to her. Was this how he treated everyone? She'd have to ask Izzie or Cristina. "It's nice to meet you, we've all heard a lot about you and your accomplishments at such young ages," he said, his arms crossed across his chest. She could only blush deeper. "Yeah, well. I've been training for this my entire life, I decided I wanted to do this professionally when my mother signed me up for classes with the Royal Ballet Academy," she said with a shrug, trying to brush it off. Really, when you thought about it, every dancer in the room was accomplished just by making it into the company and passing the grueling audition process. He continued to smile at her, his blue eyes piercing. "Well if you ever need anything, a tour around Seattle or a tour around the building, I'm always available," he smiled, charming her once again. He turned and left the studio, probably back to the men's changing area, leaving Meredith shaking slightly. After a few moments she returned to her senses and grabbed her things, dashing to the women's changing area. She needed a shower and out of her soaking wet leotard, and to jet glue her pointe shoes.

First though, she was accosted by Cristina. "Oh my god, what the hell did he want with you!?" she asked her, and Meredith shook her head. "I honestly have no idea. He offered me a tour of the building and of Seattle," she confessed, biting her lip. "I thought he was with Addison…" she trailed off, as the two girls entered the changing room, only to find that they were the only people there. Meredith grabbed her bag of street clothes, pealing her leotard off and fastening her bra as Cristina dragged her things over so they could talk more. "Well, between you and me, I've heard rumors that she's sleeping with Sloan, and what's more is that Shepherd knows and doesn't care enough about her anymore to confront her about it. I mean sure, they have chemistry on stage, and that's why he won't confront her, because everyone adores them and Webber basically shits rainbows when it comes to them and claims they bring in all the money," she said with an eye roll. "I've been here since the spring season, same as Izzie, April, George, and Alex. You're the only new one for Fall," she said with a shrug. "Stick with me though and you'll get all the dirt," she promised. At this point both girls were dressed in their street clothes, and Meredith was fixing her attention on a bleeding toe. She sighed and pulled out a bandaid, taping it around the toe and slipping her feet into her shoes. "Webber was my teacher for years," she admitted, shrugging her shoulders. That was all she would say on the matter though. Cristina could sense there was more to the story but could tell Meredith was closed on the subject. "Come on, I'll show you the stage, and our dressing rooms for when we have shows, and everything," she said, Meredith gathering both of her bags and following behind. She may have grown up at the Royal Ballet, but Pacific Northwest already had her twirling around, second guessing everything.

* * *

 **Ahhh this was so much fun writing! It feels so natural to write about ballet and dance, being a ballerina. I was in a company for six years and may be auditioning for one again in June, so this is just so much fun! If you have any questions about terminology don't hesitate to ask and please review! I promise to add in more characters, I just didn't want to throw in everyone (also I LOVED the idea of George being Meredith's first partner and being really stupid and clumsy about it! Haha). Give me feedback as to whether I should continue this story or not! I feel like it's a silly idea but it makes me happy haha.**

 **I chose the Royal Ballet School/Company because it's one of the most prestigious companies in the world and it gives Meredith more of an air of mystery :P**

 **I know this story is a completely different AU than most people are used to so feedback is appreciated! If you aren't sure of a ballet term or anything, feel free to ask in a private message or review and i'll explain in the next authors note.**

 **EDIT: My first review asked me to do a glossary with every chapter so here you go!**

corps de ballet: the men and women who make up most of a ballet company; they usually dance the generic parts.

soloists: sometimes dances corps parts, but more often are the more technical and harder parts.

principals: head of the ballet company food chain, get the featured roles and are the stars

adagio: slow movement performed with grace and fluidity

petit allegro: brisk steps or movement, along the lines of jumps

grande jete: big leap landing on one leg

bourre: a quick movement of the feet, keeping the thighs together (most often done en pointe)

pirouette: a turn done with one leg brought up to the knee

fouette: a turn done with one leg used in a whipping motion, then brought to the knee as if in a pirouette, repeating as many times as possible.

penche: leaning into an arabesque, usually over 90 degrees

pas de deux: literally 'dance of two', a dance between a man and a woman featured in a ballet, but also a portion of class

barre: warm up and the first part of every ballet class


	2. The Emperors Waltz

A few days later, Meredith found herself leaning against the barre with Cristina and April, watching Derek and Mark rehearse some of the men's roles. "God, is Mark always that gorgeous?" she whispered to Cristina as she admired the older man. He was chisled and toned without an ounce of fat on his body. Not to mention that his looks were absolutely on point. "We call him and Derek McSteamy and McDreamy," April quipped, coming up for air from a stretch. Meredith pulled her leg up to her ear, engaging in a tilt, before grinning. "McDreamy and McSteamy. I like that," she giggled, continuing to watch the two men as they started a competition of doing tours. Meredith shook her head a bit as she continued to watch them. They were both fantastic dancers and she couldn't stop watching, giggling with April and Cristina. There were a few other men standing on the other side of the room; some of them were principal dancers and some were merely in the corps like the girls were. She had picked up the names of some of them but not all. Of course she knew George, then there were two corps guys named Jackson and Alex. At the back of the room were a few girls, both soloists and principals. She had memorized their names over the past few days. Arizona Robbins, Erica Hahn, Teddy Altman, Callie Torres, Amelia Shepherd, and a few other girls, mostly soloists. Meredith already knew that Amelia was Derek's younger sister, as if she couldn't tell by the fact that the pair looked exactly alike.

Soon enough they called four of the corps girls to the center, including Meredith and Cristina, to rehearse the Dance of the Little Swans, quite possibly the most famous corps roles in the history of ballet. Meredith knew it well, having had the chance to perform it at the Royal this past spring, but learning it with three new people and getting in sync with them was entirely different and took an immense amount of dedication and practice. She could feel everyone's eyes on her, as the new girl in the company, and she refused to disappoint even though she could feel her pointe shoes deteriorating as she danced on. Goddammit, she hadn't even gotten two days out of this pair. Finally, when Webber deemed the dance appropriate, he dismissed the four girls back to the barre, calling forth some of the soloist girls and soloist guys to rehearse. Meredith, out of breath and chugging water, bent at the waist to catch her breath before looking up. Dammit, Derek's eyes were on her again, looking at her in amazement. "I'm heading to the bathroom," she mumbled to Cristina, grabbing her sweater and throwing it over her shoulders to keep warm before dashing out of the door. She was halfway to the women's locker room when she felt a strong hand around her tiny wrist.

"Excuse me…" she started, before turning around. It was Derek himself. Her eyes went wide and her mouth opened slightly. "Errr hello," she mumbled, green eyes sparkling up at him as she tried to flash him a weak smile. "You're pretty amazing for a corps girl," he stated, dropping her arm and smiling at him. It was all she could to do keep from melting into the floor. "Yeah, well. Webber taught me most of my life, up until I was 15, and I was basically a member of the Royal Ballet for two seasons, and I did a lot of competitions," she said, realizing she was babbling before shaking her head and blushing. "What do you want with me? I'm just a lowly corps girl," she said with a shrug, pulling her sweater over her head so she could try and keep warm in between rehearsing her parts. "I'd love to take you out sometime," he said point blank, arms crossed over his chest. "You're new to the city, I've been here nearly ten years. We should get to know each other. If I know Webber, you're his new protégé, you'll rise through the ranks in no time or at the very least we'll be thrown together in partnering." He said with a wider grin. Meredith didn't exactly mind this at all, but she bit her lip. "What about Addison?" she said, raising a brow. She wasn't dumb, she'd been here a few days and had heard so many different things. "Hah! Oh, Addison likes to think what she wants to think but at the end of the day, she goes home with someone else," he smirked, shrugging his shoulders. "I'm completely free," he said, running a hand through his dark, sweaty hair. Meredith took a breath and sighed. He was nearly 10 years older than he was, but in their world, in the world of dance, ten years was absolutely nothing when your career could be cut short in a second, with a misplaced foot, a terrible partner dropping you, putting your weight on the wrong toe. She looked down at her feet, dragging her ragged pointe shoes into the tiled floors before looking up. "I think we could do that," she said with a smile and a certain shyness that came with being 18 and living across the country from your mother.

* * *

Later that evening, Meredith was getting ready when the doorbell rang. She rushed downstairs and pulled open the heavy front door, smiling through the glass storm door when she saw Derek standing there. She pushed it open and let him in, letting him enclose her in a tight hug. "You really live here?" he asked, looking around the spacious house and Meredith blushed. "Well, I lived here with my parents until I was five. Then they divorced and my mom and I moved to London. She's a ballerina turned ballet mistress, and she kind of didn't care what I did growing up, as long as she didn't have to deal with it. So I began dance like she had and she just signed the checks and let me do whatever. Summer programs in Russia, Paris, New York, wherever I got in," she shrugged, running her fingers through her hair, which was down for the first time in what seemed like forever. She was dressed casually in tight jeans, a teal blouse, and black flats, still looking ever like the ballerina. Her face had a light sheen of makeup and he thought she looked beautiful. "My dad lives here in Seattle, still. He remarried and I know he has two daughters but." She shrugged, not really caring about them. "What about you? What made you choose Seattle?" she smiled. "Let' go and I'll tell you," he smiled, holding out his hand. She grabbed a grey leather jacket and a small clutch, making sure she had her keys and her phone, locking up the house and climbing into the front seat of his car. They drove for about an hour, taking the ferry boat, then driving about 20 minutes into the woods until the reached a clearing. "We're here," he declared and she smiled. She definitely wasn't expecting this. He helped her out of the car and he took her hand, leading her towards the small trailer by the woods. "I have four sisters – all of them are dancers. My youngest sister, Amelia, she's 22? She's a soloist in the company, I daresay you've seen her by now. She's loud and pushy. Very vocal. If someone is doing something she doesn't like she complains about it. She and Addison hate each other," he laughed, shaking his head. "Nancy is with San Francisco ballet, Lizzie is with American Ballet Theater, and Kathleen is with your beloved Royal Ballet." Meredith wracked her brain and conjured up a picture of Kathleen Shepherd, except her last name wasn't Shepherd anymore. She looked just like her younger brother, however. "My dad died when I was ten, Mark is practically like my brother. And I live in that trailer, right there," he pointed out, laughing a little bit. "I moved into it when Addison and I personally broke up. I let her have the fancy condo as long as she doesn't bother me on this land. She's my partner in the studio and on stage but I hate her," he told Meredith. She nodded; she had had the same types of relationships before, with so much chemistry on stage but hating them off. "I like it," she decided with a smile, squeezing his hand tightly as she let him lead her to the deck of the trailer. She sunk into a chair and gazed at the space around her; she could see the sun setting just over a ridge and she smiled. It was chilly outside but she didn't care, the view was beautiful. Derek came back outside with a glass of white wine and she smiled at him in silent thanks as he sunk down in the chair beside her.

"So what's it like coming from a family of dancers? I mean for all I know my sisters are dancers, but I guess I'll never know, my mom is a dancer but it's just the two of us" she laughed, shrugging her shoulders. He couldn't help but laugh. "Well, we're from Long Island so we all started at a small studio there. As we got older we all went to American Ballet Theater for classes and training. Like I said, Lizzie is the only one who stayed with them. They asked invited us all to stay, but we all went elsewhere. Amelia likes to compete with me so she followed me out here. She's bossy but she's a good dancer. Everyone says Webber is going to promote her soon, which makes Addison mad since so far, she's the youngest principal dancer. She was 23, and Amelia is only 22. The two hate each other, Amelia could see through her act since day one," he shrugged, drinking his beer. Meredith merely nodded. She was so in tune to the drama that went on behind the curtain, that traveled from ballet company to ballet company, she was so used to it. From the age of ten, when she was shoved into Youth America Grand Prix, she had been on display for the entire world, and everyone had known her name ever since. It was just her life at this point, being on display in a bejeweled tutu and tiara. "What about you? I mean, you told me about dance, and your mom, and running away from your mom. But what about you? What about Meredith?" she couldn't help but laugh and drank more of her wine; she knew he was cooking dinner because she could smell how amazing it smelled.

"Well, I just turned 18 in May. But I've pretty much been on my own since I was five. I was raised by nannies because my mother is crazy and um, well. She's sort of big in the world of dance," she said, looking down at her lap. She hated talking her mother, simply because she complicated things. Everyone thought that Meredith got places because of her name, until the music started and they saw the girl dancing, and realized she was there based on her talent. Derek stared at her for a few seconds, before it clicked in his head. "Your mother is THE Ellis Grey!?" he exclaimed, his eyes widening. "Ellis Grey, as in prima ballerina with the Paris Opera Ballet, who is now Head Ballet Mistress at the Royal," he said, astounded. Meredith sipped her wine and shook her head. "No wonder you wanted to run as far as you could, I heard she's brutal." Meredith laughed, choking on her wine slightly. "She's brutal to other people's children. Try being her own child. She spares no mercy at all. I guess in a way it was good, because I'm kind of a robot. Give me a number of turns and I can execute them. I was always told I wasn't good enough, so I left England and came here. Webber was one of my teachers growing up but I didn't know he was here," she said with a small shrug, draining her glass of wine. Luckily he was ready to pour her a second glass. "Following in mommy's footsteps is a pretty big thing to do," she rolled her eyes, sitting back in the chair and stretching out her long legs. Derek couldn't help but laugh, reaching for her hand and rubbing circles with his thumb. "Hey, I have three older sisters. I can't say it's the same as following in the footsteps of Ellis Grey, but Nancy, Elizabeth, and Kathleen Shepherd are pretty formidable, as is Amelia Shepherd," he reassured her. "Give me a second," he smiled, heading inside the trailer to check on dinner.

A few minutes later he came out with two plates, one for each of them, heaped with fish, spinach, potatoes, and even more wine. Definitely a well-balanced meal for dancers. "This looks amazing," she said, setting down her wine and digging in. She had to admit, he was a good cook. Much better than she was – she had already nearly set the kitchen on fire since she'd been here. Growing up with a staff in their house in Kensington, a cook had been thrown into the mix along with a nanny and a few housekeepers. Meredith mainly had the run of the house when her mother was still in the company, then when she was taking 7 hours of classes every day she was never home. Alone in Seattle, she missed the four story townhome in the heart of London, although the weather was the same – rain, rain, and more rain. She loved it, it reminded her of home. Looking up from her dinner she smiled. "It's delicious, how the hell did you learn to cook while being in a company? Most dancers I know, they only know how to order take out," she laughed, knowing that she herself was one of those dancers. "Me, I eat cold pizza for breakfast before I come to class," she giggled, setting down her now empty plate and taking a drink of wine. "Four sisters, remember? Four sisters, three of whom are mothers, and my mom, who can feed a small army," he joked, moving his arms behind his head and getting comfortable. "This is true, not everyone has Ellis Grey as their mother," she teased, scrunching her nose up. "Keep that quiet, please, although I'm sure everyone has googled the hell out of me by now," she said with an eye roll. He laughed a little harder. "Come on, you're the only new dancer we get this season, and you come all the way from London? Everyone is dying to get their hands on you. Plus, you're good enough to have been hired as a soloist, though I'm sure Webber would've been accused as favoriting you," he shrugged. Again, she scrunched up her nose. "Hey, I'm here to work as hard as everyone else and be treated like everyone else," she said, but she broke a smile, nudging his foot with hers. She was enjoying his company and he definitely wasn't like any other male dancer she had ever met. He had an ego, sure, but he was just different.

After a few hours of sitting outside and talking, eventually snuggled up in blankets, he stood up and offered her his hand. "Time to bring the lady home, we have class bright and early in the morning." She smiled and grinned as he pulled her into him, looking down at her. Slowly, gently, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to her lips before coming up. She couldn't help but smile, letting her fingers roam through his tousled hair, before he led her back to his car. She climbed into the passenger seat and it seemed in no time at all, they were back at her big, empty house and he was walking her to the door. "So, tonight was kind of great," she said with a smile, unlocking the door and the two of them stepped inside. This time she leaned in and kissed him, a smile spreading across her face before stepping back happily. "See you in the morning?" she breathed, her body pressed against his. He closed his eyes and breathed in her lavender scent deeply, nodding. "You know I'll be there bright and early," he promised, before turning to leave, leaving Meredith breathless in the front hall.

* * *

 **Thank you so much for the positive reviews! I'm so glad you guys like the story so far! If you ever have a question about terminology feel free to PM me or leave a review wth a question and i'll address it in the next chapter or make an authors note :D I'm so excited people are liking this story!**

 **This is a MerDer story and it wouldn't be complete without the trailer involved somehow ;)**

 **For people who don't know, pointe shoes are generally made out of many layers of paper and glue, molded together to make a shoe. They're very stiff when you get them and require a 'breaking in' period, whether that means banging them against things, removing a nail in the shank (the bottom part), slamming them in doors, using water to loosen the glue, etc. Every dancer has their own way of breaking in shoes. For me, I prefer slamming mine in my door and hitting them against walls XD My feet are strong and most of the time I can step into a brand new pair and they hug my arch, but the box, aka the place you stand on and where your toes are, are super hard and you end up with blisters and bleeding there. I've been dancing since i was 3, en pointe since I was 10 (I'm 26 now), and have gone through hundreds of pairs! They average 75-85 a pair. Dance is a super expensive hobby/sport but I can't imagine my life without it!**


	3. Rite of Spring

It was next Monday, and Meredith had been at Pacific Northwest for a week now. She was starting to feel comfortable, but sometimes she was thrown for a loop, like this morning when the new rehearsal schedule was posted on the wall. She was called to learn the divertissement for A Midsummer's Night Dream, with Mark of all people. As she stared at the piece of paper on the wall her heart started beating out of her chest. How? Why? She could feel the crowd of people giving her space as she whirled around – they were looking at her in awe. She was new, she was only in the corps, she was called to learn a pas de deux with a principal dancer. Her heart was beating in her throat, her phone was in her hand as she quickly texted her mother, who was probably getting ready for a show tonight in London. Other than that role, she was called for the corps in Serenade again, as well as Rubies in Jewels, normal corps roles that she knew but needed to practice. Right now she needed air.

Grabbing her jacket and the booties she always wore over her shoes, she fled to the rooftop with her phone. She knew everyone downstairs hated her, even probably thought she was getting favored by Webber or because of her mother, and she needed to be brought back down to earth. These things happened, corps girls got thrown into soloist or principal positions all the time. She knew she was a different case, but she didn't want to be a different case. She didn't want to be a favorite. She sighed, content to stand out in the misty rain, although she knew sooner rather than later she'd have to go back downstairs for rehearsal and not risk losing her warmth from class.

* * *

Rehearsal was difficult; it wasn't that partnering with Mark was difficult, he was the exact opposite of difficult. Partnering with Mark was an absolute dream, and she could feel Derek's watchful eye's on the two of them, smiling as he watched Meredith's every move, the careful way she executed everything gracefully and the way Mark handled the petite 18 year old, yet they both managed to hit every position and hold them for the exact counts. Meredith could definitely get used to partnering with the principals, and dreaded the day she had to go back to George. It was difficult because Meredith could feel the stares of 30 girls on her, throwing every ounce of jealousy and hatred towards her. And why shouldn't they? She'd been there a week and had been thrown a principal role. She decided to shake it off and enjoy the moment, giggling when Mark hoisted her in the air in a complicated lift. _Dear God, Derek was gorgeous but this man was an Apollo,_ she thought, gazing down at the bulge in his tights. She needed to stop being an airhead 18 year old and concentrate. Mark slowly lowered her back to the ground and they both took their ending poses, Meredith leaning back in his arms, Mark looking down at her lovingly. She could feel the hate radiating from Addison, and could hear Amelia's laughter pealing from the back of the studio. "That was perfect, thanks guys," Webber said as Meredith and Mark returned to their normal standing positions. He gave a few corrections for the pair, which Meredith marked, before dismissing them and bringing out the corps for rehearsal. Meredith retreated to the barre and Derek.

* * *

"He's undressing you with his eyes," he mused, and Meredith stood up with her bottle of water. "I'd rather have you do that," she teased him, gulping down water and wiping herself down with her towel.. "Or really, I know you're doing that," she smirked, kicking his foot with her pointe shoe – her fourth pair in the week that she'd been with the company. She needed to switch brands, she was killing them faster than when she had been as a student. Derek laughed loudly and hugged her to him, gaining more stares from the rest of the company, and a glare from Addison, but Meredith was beyond caring. She was beginning to find her place here, beginning to be comfortable here.

She could feel her phone vibrate at her feet and she ducked to check it; it was her mother. She breathlessly unlocked her phone, only to see the two words. 'Good girl'. Certainly more than she had been expecting, and more praise than she had ever received from Ellis in her entire life. She dropped her phone back into her t-shirt, hugging one of her legs to her chest before extending it, making sure she was fresh and ready when she was called to the floor again.

When she was called to the center again, she and the other girls were all given positions for Serenade, one of her favorite ballets and one of the ballets they were to begin performing Friday. It was a classic, one of Balanchine's originals, and once the music started she lived and breathed the flighty, complicated steps with her eyes closed, anticipating everyone's movements, flicking her hands and feet properly, feeling alive. This right here, this was why she danced, this was why she kept going. It wasn't about the money or the fame to her, she just wanted to dance and be happy.

* * *

After a week of intense rehearsals and costume fittings, Friday night had finally arrived. They were opening up the season with A Midsummer's Night Dream, and Webber had decided to take a chance on Meredith and throw her on stage with the act 2 Divertissement. Her pas de deux with Mark was basically a short dance at the wedding of Oberon and Titania, but she was seriously freaking out about it. It was her chance to show not only her fellow company members, but also the patrons of the company, what she was made of. She paced back and forth in the wings, her hair perfect, the ribbons on her shoes sewn together so they wouldn't come undone while she was dancing. She'd dipped the toes of her shoes in the rosin box but her OCD told her to do it again and she groaned. She wasn't typically nervous, but 18 years old and the newest member of the company with an important role? She was definitely nervous.

She heard the music that began their dance, and Mark's hand on her wrist, and suddenly she was bourreing in time to the music, Mark steadily walking next to her. She went to take her first jump, and she was flying through the air, Mark's arms strong against her waist. It was like a dream, dancing with him, with him knowing and anticipating her every move. In no time at all the pas de deux was over and they were taking their bows to Titania and Oberon, before rushing off the stage. In the wings, Meredith's heart was beating rapidly. The crowd was clapping wildly for the pair and she was sweating profusely. "I can't believe I just did that," she gasped, bending over and trying to catch her breath. She had just danced before Derek and Addison, who were of course Titania and Oberon, and she felt great about it. She held her own and was able to balance out the pair in the pas de deux.

Once the show was finished and everyone took their final bows, Meredith headed back to the dressing room, completely exhausted, covered in sweat, and wanting to just go home and shower and collapse into bed. She was still dressed in a beautiful costume; a minty green dress made of tulle and embroidery, a gold rhinestone tiara pinned to her head. Derek caught up to her in the hallway and gathered her in a huge hug, kissing her forehead. "You were extraordinary out there," he said with a huge smile. "You promise? You're not just teasing?" she giggled, although she knew he was telling the truth. "I'm still not sure why he gave me such a role but I'm glad," she confessed, giving him another hug before trailing off, her fingertips the last to leave his. Once in the dressing room, she was greeted by a huge bouquet of pink roses in front of her theater area. They obscured all of her carefully layed out brushes, palettes, and sponges, and just as she was sifting through them for a card to see who they were from, she heard a voice from the doorway.

"Meredith, darling!"

"Mother," Meredith said, turning around slowly. So much for getting out of her costume and completely dead shoes soon.

* * *

 **I found it fitting that Ellis would show up out of the blue to scrutinize her daughter's first professional performance! I wanted it to be a positive thing, to show that yes Meredith exceeded all of her expectations, but I definitely didn't want Meredith to change her mind or warm up to Ellis after years of neglect. Things like that take time, etc.**

 **I threw Meredith in a soloist/principal role so soon as most companies do that with new members; they like to see what they're made of and give them a challenge to see if their dancers are worth the money they're paying them and the time they're investing them, plus if they made the right choice in hiring them.**

 **Here are your ballet/French vocabulary words this update!**

 **Divertissement: a minor entertainment or diversion**


	4. Palladio Allegretto

Meredith stood stock still in her dressing room, still dressed in the minty-green costume, tiara affixed to her head, staring at Ellis Grey in the doorway. Cristina had stood up from where she was putting on her pointe shoes, her eyes wide as she stared at the legendary Ellis Grey.

"Mother, what are you doing here?" she asked formally, moving forward and taking her moms arm so they could go somewhere private to talk. She found a smaller, empty dressing room and walked in there, flicking on the light and hoping her mother followed in there. She did and she shut the door, harder than she meant to. Crossing her arms she whirled around, looking up at her mother.

"Well?" she asked, chewing on her lips, knowing the red lipstick was going to come off. Whatever, her part in the ballet was over, and it had been great.

"I wanted to see you dance in your first professional part," Ellis explained, a light smile on her face. Meredith simply rolled her eyes and heaved a sigh.

"Mother I danced in your own company for a year and you didn't seem to care, I move halfway around the world to get away from you and you chase me down to see me perform? For what? To tear me to shreds and tell me I don't deserve this? To tell me I'm too ordinary to make it as a ballerina?" she said, her voice rising in octaves. Ellis simply stood there and looked at her 18 year old daughter, fresh off her first performance, a soloist role as a corps member, and shook her head slightly.

"You were beautiful out there, Meredith. You shine. You remind me of me when I danced here," she said, her arms gesturing. Meredith straightened up; she hadn't known her mother had danced at PNB. That still didn't make up for 18 years of ignoring her.

"You ignored me. I tried and I tried to impress you and you ignored me!" she cried out, wanting to stomp her foot like she would have a year ago, but she was older now, living on her own, and more mature now.

"I was trying not to favor my own daughter! I had to ignore you," she insisted, but Meredith had enough.

"Thank you for coming tonight mother, and thank you for finally seeing that I'm talented and worth something, but your negligence for my entire life runs far too deep," she said, her green eyes flashing. "If you'd like to work on our relationship perhaps you can come up with better excuses for ignoring me my entire life and making me feel completely worthless!" she said, bowing to her in slight reverence, before turning and fleeing back to her own dressing room.

Izzie and April were there and they watched Meredith as she carefully removed the bobby pins securing her tiara to her head, waiting for her to blow up. After the tiara was off her head she set it down in front of her mirror and sighed, before sitting on the ground and untying the ribbons on her pointe shoes, looking up.

"Yes? Are you waiting for something?" she asked them, a hint of bitterness in her voice. April spoke first.

"Well, um, that was Ellis Grey. I mean. THE Ellis Grey." Meredith narrowed her eyes at them.

"Yes, I'm aware of who she is, she's my mother," she said, releasing a foot from her pointe shoe and inspecting the damage as she massaged her aching toes. April's eyes shot open as well as her mouth as Meredith worked on freeing her other foot from it's shoe.

"What? I mean, seriously? Oh my gosh I would die if Ellis Grey were my mother, that's so cool!" Meredith started to grow huffy, wanting to throw the dead, smelly shoes at the redhead.

"It's not cool, she's a soulless bitch who I could probably sue for neglect," she said, deciding instead to throw her shoes at her open theater case, where her warmups and other pairs of shoes spilled out of. She was completely done with today and just wanted to go home. Pulling of her costume, she carefully hung it on the rack with their other costumes – she shared the dressing room with Izzie, April, and Cristina – and pulled on a pair of leggings and a Royal Ballet hoodie that was threadbare but she insisted on keeping it, thinking of the memories it held for her.

"I'm going home, I'll see you for warm-up before the show tomorrow," she said, forcing a polite smile as she packed up her theater case, leaving the dressing room and making her way to the car. She had wanted to see Derek before she left but her mother showing up had ruined her night.

* * *

The next morning, as Meredith walked into the studio, she could feel everyone talking about her and her mother. Everyone seemed to hush as she passed and she rolled her eyes as she traipsed into the dressing room, changing into her leotard, tights, and warm ups, and made her way into the dance studio for class. She was above this. She was a professional. If people wanted to make small, petty talk over her and her mother, let them.

She took her normal spot at the barre, but after a moment felt the hairs at the back of her neck stand straight up, as if she were being watched. She slowly turned and it was Derek, surrendering his place by the window and choosing to stand behind her. She offered him a small smile, which he returned by leaning in and brushing a kiss against her cheek.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there last night when your mother came in for the attack," he said quietly to her. She straightened up slowly. _THAT_ she hadn't been expecting.

"Thank you, I think," she said slowly, biting on her lip. She wanted to say so much to him, but figured it could wait for lunch.

"You were beautiful last night. You're spectacular. You're a ray of light when you dance. You get this look on your face, something I've never seen in anybody before. You're just so indescribably happy because you're doing what you love doing, and no one, not even your mother, can take that away from you," he said, kissing her forehead. She couldn't help but smile, wishing she could kiss him full out in front of everyone, but then Mistress Bailey clapped her hands together and she was forced to turn around, left hand on the barre and start plies. _Plie, stretch. Plie, stretch. Grande plié, stretch. Four count port de bras, tendu side, and breathe. Plie, stretch, plite, stretch….._

* * *

After barre, Meredith sat on the floor in a middle oversplit, two therabands tied together behind her back to give her a maximum stretch. She was flexible, probably more flexible than she needed to be, but she liked stretching it out to keep herself nimble and able to extend her legs full out, whether it be at the barre, during center, across the floor, or in rehearsal. She was serious about dance, about wanting to be the best she could be, and she was willing to do whatever she could. After all, as much as she hated to admit it, she had learned these grueling but effective techniques from the best – her mother.

After stretching, she put on today's pair of pointe shoes, which she had just sewn and prepared this morning. Thank god the company paid for their pointe shoes, or she'd be completely broke – her shoes were 91 dollars a pair, and the way she was going through them she'd need to start buying stock in Russian Pointe. Standing up, she tested how well she had broken this pair in for today's rehearsals. She already had a pair for tonight's performance, sitting on the radiator in her dressing room, upstairs by the stage.

Standing in formation for Serenade, she reflected on the ballet. Serenade was one of her favorite ballets and it was her first time performing it tonight. She couldn't help but smile, letting the events of the night before shed away as she danced in time to the music, becoming one with the corps. She was one of 17 girls; one of the principal girls was Teddy, who Meredith had only exchanged a few words with. She was in awe of the long lines the older girl created, of how graceful she looked dancing one of the leads in the ballet. She was paired with Owen Hunt, who was 32 and older than most of the company, but just as talented as everyone else. Serenade was one of the longer of the shorter ballets, nearing half an hour of near constant movement, and by the end of the rehearsal Meredith found herself with her head between her legs, gasping for air. She hated whenever patrons gushed about how beautiful and effortless ballet seemed; if only they could stand in the wings after an especially long movement. One of her favorite books about the art was called 'Where Snowflakes Dance and Swear' and every time she spotted it on her kindle she had to giggle, especially if it was Nutcracker season.

* * *

Finally the dancers were given an hour for lunch, and Meredith painfully walked from the room. Her shoes hadn't been broken in enough and sure enough, as she flopped on the floor in front of her theater case, there was a small pool of blood on the inside. "Fuck," she mumbled to herself, groaning. Luckily she kept a huge stash of band-aids in a pouch inside her case, and she worked on bandaging herself up. Once she was finished, she stuffed her feet inside Uggs and grabbed her wallet, heading down the hall to Derek's dressing room and standing in the doorway.

"Hey stranger," she said with a smile as he pulled on a hoodie. He ambled over to the doorway and gave her a peck on the lips before wrapping an arm around her waist. There was a café on the bottom level of the school and they made their way downstairs to get lunch. Meredith made a beeline for some pizza and pasta, adding spinach on the side with some olive oil on top. Derek on the other hand chose a grilled chicken breast with steamed vegetables and a baked potato. They reconvened at a table and he looked at her lunch choice, raising an eyebrow. She looked back at him, wrinkling her nose.

"What? It's what I like to eat!" she insisted, taking a bite of the gooey, cheesy pizza. He couldn't help but laugh.

"How the hell do you stay so skinny by eating crap food?" She giggled and took another bite of her pizza.

"Oh I don't know, I dance between eight and ten hours a day and on top of that I have a killer metabolism," she teased him, taking a gulp of water, which was pretty much the healthiest thing on her tray. He ate a bite of his chicken and shook his head laughing at her.

"You're a ballerina. Love your body. Nourish it."

"I love my body. I love it so much that I give it what it wants," she giggled, finishing her pizza and moving on to her pasta. "If I'm doing Serenade tonight I need energy," she smirked, sticking her tongue out at him with another laugh. He let it drop and let her enjoy her food, knowing that one day he'd get her to cave and bring her to the healthy side.

* * *

There were more rehearsals throughout the day; in addition to Serenade, they were performing Symphony in C tonight and The Chairman Dances. Meredith was only in Serenade and Symphony in C, but Serenade came first. Later that evening she sat in front of her mirror in the dressing room, light bulbs framing the mirror as she did her makeup. First she applied liquid foundation, one color lighter than her actual skin color, making sure it was well-blended in. Next came powder, making sure her entire face was pancaked. Once her skin-base was taken care of she penciled in her eyebrows, making them even and perfect, plucking a few stray hairs. A bright and even blush was swept over her high cheekbones, along with a bit of bronzer. Her eyes were a project unto itself. She had years of experience gluing false eyelashes on but that didn't mean it didn't suck to do them any less. Luckily tonight they went on easily, and she was able to quickly finish her makeup. Her hair was already slicked back into a perfect bun, so she moved to the costume rack, pulling her powdery blue dress off the hanger and slipping easily into it. It was ten minutes to curtain and she picked up her pointe shoes and toepads, heading for the wings in order to use the rosin box.

Once she was sewn into her pointe shoes, complete with rosin on her heels and toes, she did a series of jumps in place, trying to keep warm. Most of the girls in Serenade were either in the wings or practicing on stage, with Mark, Derek, and Owen going over their individual parts, with Addison, Amelia, and Teddy close by. Teddy was dancing Waltz girl with Owen, Addison was dancing the Elegy section with Derek, and Amelia had been chosen to dance the Sonatina section with Mark. She couldn't help but envy Teddy; Waltz was her favorite section in the ballet.

With two minutes to curtain the girls took their places; the opening positions were two diamonds facing one another. Meredith was in the second line next to April on stage right, her right arm in front of her face, facing Cristina. She could hear the stage manager yell "CURTAIN UP" and she stuck her tongue out to her friend and whispered "Merde!" before adopting a more serious look, arm moving slowly to the music of Tchaikovsky until it was closer to her face, her arm movements fluid, until suddenly the rest of her body started moving…and didn't stop. Weaving in and out of formations, striking poses, running on and off stage…she was in the zone for the next half hour with twenty other blue-gowned girls.

* * *

After striking her final pose of the ballet, the curtain fell and Meredith wanted to collapse in a heap. Cristina ran over to her and grabbed her, the two girls dashing to their shared dressing room, trying to catch their breath from the last half hour of dancing they had just done. They were both in the next ballet, which gave them fifteen minutes to catch their breath, change, and hydrate.

Peeling the blue dress off of herself, Meredith pulled on the ornate white and gold classical tutu for Symphony and C, glad that one of the dressers was there to clasp up the back and pin on the ornate tiara. She caught a look at herself in the mirror and smiled slightly; she looked like a 'real' ballerina, the one that had featured in many of her drawings as a child. Her breathing had evened out at this time as she grabbed her water bottle, trying to take even gulps, keeping an eye on the clock. The stage manager called for five minutes and she ran back upstairs to the wings, jumping up and down again, but she could feel rivulets of sweat slipping down her back and knew she was warm enough.

Symphony in C was a classical ballet that called for precise movements; there were only 8 corps girls in it, two soloists, and one principal. Amelia and Arizona were the featured soloists, with Erica the principal. The men dancing were Jackson, Alex, and a guy named Preston, who Meredith hadn't spoken to yet; Derek was in the last ballet of the night, which Meredith planned on watching from the audience.

Running to take her place on stage, she took a few deep breaths and psyched herself up for another half hour of high energy dancing, of trying to pace her breathing, of running off and on stage and trying not to mess anything up. As the chords of Bizet rung through the theater, she counted the eight's within her head and made sure she didn't mess anything up. She had an air of confidence around her that someone much more seasoned than she was would have, but she was always sure of herself when she was on the stage. When the curtain went down on the ballet, she broke a smile, breaking free from her pose and heading towards the dressing room.

Once inside she flopped onto the floor on her back, heaving deep breaths. She was covered in sweat, her makeup melting off, as Cristina entered the room and threw a pointe shoe at her.

"I think I'm dying. Like no, actually, I think I'm dying," Meredith gasped for air, sprawled out on the floor. Cristina couldn't help but laugh as she attempted to unhook herself from her costume, pulling pin after pin out of her hair, dropping them in front of her mirror.

"This is how I feel every single night," she gasped as well, shaking her head as her bun fell out and her black hair fell over her shoulders. She placed her tiara in front of her and tried to catch her breath, laughing at Meredith with her eyes closed on the floor.

"Yeah but like. It's the rush. It's the amazing rush of performing. Of flying across the stage every night," Meredith breathed, opening her eyes again and sitting up, taking off her shoes and tossing them at her theater case. "It makes me feel alive. We didn't choose this life, it was chosen for us," she tried to explain, before shaking her head a little bit. "I mean, we did choose this life, until a certain point, and then….they chose it for us. You know? No. I'm speaking gibberish," she laughed, standing up and unhooking her costume, hanging it up on the rack before turning around, wearing her nude leotard and pink tights, placing her tiara in front of her mirror. She snatched her leggings, sweater, and cami from her bag, quickly changing and slipping her aching feet into Uggs. "I'm going to watch Chairman Dances from the house, want to watch with me?" she asked Cristina, leaving all of her things backstage. Cristina snorted.

"You mean you want to watch Derek from the house?" she quipped, and Meredith rolled her eyes a bit. Everyone in the company knew about the pair, but she didn't really give a crap. It wasn't a secret and it was commonplace for people in the company to date one another – it wasn't like dancers had much of a chance to meet people who didn't dance, and it was normal for dancers of different ages to dance as well.

"Come on, isn't there anyone in the company you're attracted to? There has to be someone Cristina, you and I both know you live, sleep, and breathe ballet just like me," she smirked, crossing her arms at her friend. Cristina was fighting a losing battle with her hair; it was too curly from being in a tight bun all day and finally she just threw it back up into a bun.

"Ugh. Fine. If I tell you this, you're not allowed to tell anyone, okay? This makes you my best friend, or my person, or something," she groaned, rolling her eyes. She took a deep breath before looking up at Meredith. "It's Preston. Burke. Preston Burke who just danced the male lead in Symphony. We've gone out a few times, but when we're here he pretends I don't exist," she said with a small sigh. Meredith sighed as well; at least Derek didn't care about anyone caring who saw them and he was always happy to see her. Cristina got up from her chair and slid her arm through Meredith's as they headed towards the door that would lead them to the audience.

"If he likes you he should show you some respect. Or you should demand some respect. He should acknowledge you exist in the studio. Fuck hierarchy. He should let it be known that you exist," Meredith demanded. Men were so fickle; she hated that she was 18 and already knew that important life lesson. "Demand it. Corner him and demand it," she smirked as they entered the lobby of the theater. Patrons were strolling around and a few noticed the two young ballerinas. "Maybe you should give him an ultimatum?" she said with a shrug. The only 'relationships' she'd ever been in were with other dancers, who had been more than happy to let the entire studio know they were with her, but Burke was nearing his thirties and he was acting like a child. "Sleepover at my place tonight and we'll figure something out," she grinned as they entered the theater, finding places near the front that were reserved for dancers who wanted to view the ballet.

"Deal," Cristina said with a smile, the two girls taking a seat and settling in to watch.

* * *

 **So this ended up being super long for me! But I loved it because describing dance is magical for me haha. I promise Meredith and Derek are going to dance together soon! I'm debating the perfect first role for them and I promise it's going to be BEFORE Nutcracker! And I promise they will dance together in The Nutcracker.**

 **Since there's so few guys on Grey's I kind of have to get creative about who partners who, so even if I say they're corps, like George, Alex, Jackson, etc, I have to push them up to soloist sometimes since there's not many of them** **There's so many more girls! And I plan on adding Reed, Charles, Maggie, Shane, Leah, Jo, etc! All in good time, readers!**

 **Please read and review! You're all so amazing and encouraging**

 **Anyway here's some new words for this update!**

 **Reverance: respect/gratitude shown at the end of a ballet class in the form of a bow or curtsy**

 **Plié: a small or deep bend of the knee, the first exercise at the barre at the beginning of a ballet class**

 **Tendue: pointing of the toes**

 **Oversplit: literally, an overextension of a split**

 **Theraband: a stretchy band used to stretch all parts of the body**

 **Merde: literal meaning: shit. What dancers say to each other instead of "break a leg"**


	5. Montagues and Capulets

After a month in the company, and weeks of performances, Meredith was content to lay in bed all day on a Monday. Monday was always their day off now, a day off from class, rehearsals, and shows. They were free to do whatever they wanted to, so naturally she slept in until noon, ate cereal from the box, and binge-watched tv shows on Netflix. She decided Monday was her new favorite day of her professional life, simply because the only time she needed to get out of bed was to use the bathroom.

Tuesday was different though. She returned to the studios feeling refreshed, dragging her dance bag with her as she entered the dressing room of the studios, quickly changing as usual and twisting her hair into a bun. Back to the daily grind. There was a show tonight; she was to do Serenade and Symphony in C again, but she was getting used to it by now. On her way into the studio she passed by the rehearsal list and froze. She knew they were performing Romeo and Juliet next weekend, but the cast hadn't been posted yet. Well, she was staring at it now, and under the title for Juliet was M. Grey. Her eyes widened and she wanted to scream and jump up and down. Her eyes followed the name across from Romeo and her heart started beating faster. D. Shepherd. She was frozen in front of the board, staring at their names. They were Romeo and Juliet for the rest of the fall season. She wasn't sure why she was given a principal role, other than the fact that Webber wanted to push her and push her and show her off, but right now she was forever grateful. Dashing into the studio, she spotted Cristina and made a beeline for her.

"OhmygodCristinatheycastmeasJuliet" she said incredibly fast, her eyes wide and her heart still beating fast. Somehow Cristina was able to understand her and her own eyes went wide.

"What? Seriously?" She said loudly. She wasn't jealous of Meredith; she was getting her own great roles, and the pair started jumping up and down in glee. Izzie was close to the pair and rolled her eyes, scoffing. She had grown to dislike the pair, who had become quick best friends and seemed to share their own language.

"Not only that, but guess who my Romeo is?" Meredith smirked, her green eyes lighting up. Cristina started cracking up and shaking her head.

"Oh god, Webber didn't!" she laughed, as Meredith nodded.

"Oh, he did," Mere said smugly, as the pianist began playing the first strains of their plié music. "I'll talk to you after!" she cried, fleeing to her spot at the barre in front of Derek, turning around for a moment. "I look forward to rehearsing with you, Romeo," she smirked, before straightening up and becoming serious for the duration of class.

* * *

Once class was over, the entire company was called to rehearse Romeo and Juliet. The main cast stood at the front; Addison and Mark were Lord and Lady Capulet, Teddy and Owen were Lord and Lady Montague. Shane, Alex, and George were Tybalt, Benvolio, and Mercutio, respectively, the boys excited to dance a larger role than they were used to. Jackson was to dance Paris, with a quiet soloist named Ben dancing Escalus. April had ended up being cast as Juliet's nurse. Amelia was grouchy; she had only been called to dance Rosaline, and as much as she actually did like Meredith and refused to dance with her brother, she was shooting daggers at the girl from the back of the group. The rest of the company were to dance various other corps and soloist roles.

Meredith had only seen the ballet before; she had never danced it. She stood on the sidelines as the corps learned the opening scene, and then rehearsed it over and over again. It was a fun one, with lots of line changing, jumping, and sword fighting. When Webber had deemed the opening dance acceptable for the day, he called for April first, teaching her the small part she had to get on stage. Then Meredith was called out and, as the only person to be dancing at the moment, she felt shy and exposed. Webber was good though, and talked her through the choreography well enough, so that when her music started she was able to dance it well enough. She loved Juliet's first dance; it was so light and pretty with jumps and a lot of acting with her nursemaid. Addison and Mark entered as Lord and Lady Capulet and they silently acted out their part, with Jackson entering next as Paris. There was some pantomime between Juliet and Paris, before Juliet danced a bit more and rushed off stage. Webber had them run the scene several times, before he called the next scene on, and so the afternoon dragged on.

* * *

They had run through the choreography for the entire ballet, except for all the pas de deux scenes. Meredith was grateful for that; her feet couldn't handle anything else today. She was eternally grateful to be dancing Juliet, but she was absolutely exhausted. Gathering up her things and taking a much needed drink of water, Master Webber walked by her and paused.

"Meredith, I'd like to speak to you in my office," he said, leaving the room. Meredith straightened up and adjusted the straps on her hot pink leotard, pulling up the waistband on her black tights. She had no idea why she was being called to his office; had she done something wrong? She took a deep breath and followed his path to his office, her heart beating out of her chest. Standing in the doorway, she waited to be invited in.

"Sit, please," he said. She shouldn't be so intimidated by him; she'd known him since she and her mother had moved to England. He had started training her since she was 5; he was responsible for accepting into the Royal Ballet Academy in the first place, and accepting her mother as well. She immediately sat in the chair in front of his desk, dropping her things on the floor, trying to hide the fact that she was shaking

"You wanted to see me sir?" she asked in a quiet, meek voice.

"Yes I did," he said, breaking into a smile. "First off, I wanted to formally welcome you into the company. I'm sorry I didn't when you first arrived. It was the beginning of the season and my mind was elsewhere, budgeting things, casting, getting everything ready. Your presence seems to have stirred things up a bit," he laughed. Meredith couldn't help but smile slightly.

"I have a habit of doing that wherever I go, I guess that's what I get for being her daughter," she said with a sigh. She was never going to get out from under her mother's shadow.

"That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about. I didn't hire you because you're Ellis Grey's daughter. I hired you because you're you. You're one of the best dancers in the world, and your mother is a fool for ignoring you. She did you an extreme disservice by doing that. Anyone can see the extreme potential that you possess simply by peeking through the doorway of the studio. I only hire the best dancers, I give my dancers the best roles that I see fit for them. I don't promote jealousy or favoritism. If a dancer is getting better roles than another, it is because they deserve them." Meredith quickly nodded, understanding flowing over her. He took pity on her because her mother made her feel like crap, but he wasn't favoring her, despite her being so new. He genuinely thought she was talented and wanted to showcase her to the wealthy donors who came to the ballet every night.

"You have the drive and potential to quickly rise to the top, and I know I won't be wrong about you. You've shown everyone in just a month what you're made of and that you won't be intimidated by anything. Keep it up." He took a breath and folded his hands on his desk. "Next time I see you, I want a top ten list of the roles you desire, and I will make it my very best to make those roles happen. Not because you're Ellis Grey's daughter, and not because your mother is my friend, but because in a few years you'll have earned every single role. Okay?"

"Okay," Meredith squeaked out, feeling like this entire conversation was too good to be true. "Thank you, sir, very much," she nodded, before standing up to leave. Finally she let her face relax into a smile, before turning to go. "I appreciate it, all of it," she smiled, before she was off to her dressing room. There were two hours to go until the performance tonight and she needed to get ready.

* * *

This was one of the longest days of Meredith's life. They were going over the whole ball scene, but adding in the dance of Juliet with Paris and Lord and Lady Capulet, and then the short Pas with Juliet and Paris. There were so many dancers crowded in the room that Meredith felt like she was going insane despite them using the largest studio. Finally, Webber deemed the scene acceptable and moved on to Romeo and Juliet's first Pas. Meredith and Derek knew the steps already, it was just performing it together for the first time.

The music started and to Meredith's surprise, they were in perfect harmony. Every step, every jump, every turn, they were in perfect sync, and when it came time to lift her it was like magic. She let her head tilt back as she soared through the air, then came down gently only to do the same steps over. At one point she made eye contact with him and smiled, their hands held as they danced. Too soon it was over, and Romeo and Juliet were torn apart for the rest of the scene. Meredith had tasted it though, that beautiful chemistry that existed between them as they danced, and even though she wasn't supposed to she kept sneaking glances at Derek and tossing him smiles, noting that he was doing the same.

Once again they were brought together in the scene and she felt sparks as he twirled her, lifting her petite body in his strong arms, dipping her close to the ground, flipping her upside down…oh god, she didn't want it to end. She'd had pas de deux partners before, but Derek was absolute perfection. Sitting upon his shoulder as he twirled them both around before they took their final poses, she happily grinned before letting go of him and striking her pose.

Everyone in the studio stared at the pair in awe. None of them had ever seen such chemistry, such beautiful artistry, such unison before; even Webber was in shock as everyone began to politely clap. Webber cleared his throat and smiled at the pair.

"That was perfect. Both of you. Take five minutes while we sort out the rest of this scene, come on people," he said, clapping his hands.

* * *

She had five minutes. Five minutes to compose herself and get it together before she had to run back into the studio and dance. She leaned against the wall with her water bottle, downing as much water as she could but she was still sweating profusely. She looked up when she heard footsteps, breaking into a smile when she saw it was Derek.

"So that was kind of…"

"Perfect?" she volunteered, sliding down the wall so she was sitting on the floor. He laughed and took a seat next to her, wrapping an arm around her. He had enough of her sweat on him already from dancing, why not get some more?

"Well we can definitely use that word," he teased as he drew her in for a kiss. She definitely didn't mind kissing him, especially as it became heated, his tongue sliding into her mouth. She felt silly, making out with him in the abandoned hallways of PNB, but they were alone and there was this **thing** between them, burning between them, and it was even more obvious now that they had begun to dance together. After a minute or two Meredith pulled back, breathless, still close to him.

"Oh god," she moaned slightly, biting down hard on her lip as she smiled at him, running her fingers through her hair. "You're amazing. Seriously. You're kind of perfect," she smiled. She had to go back in the studio and finish the scene; it seemed never ending but at this point she didn't care. She took another deep breath and stood up, reaching for his hand before standing up on the toes of her pointe shoes, kissing him again. "Now I definitely know why the girls call you McDreamy," she teased him, tugging him back into the studio with her.

Fortunately for Meredith, she had just a short dance before Juliet and her maidens ran offstage. She was allowed to stand with Derek by the barre as they watched the rest of the ball scene unfold before them. He was entertaining her my making up stories about each person at the masked ball, and she was trying not to burst into laughter.

The next scene was the famous balcony scene, and since they weren't on stage they had to improvise, with Meredith tediously standing on a chair. She was still barely taller than Derek, which made her giggle a bit too much before she composed herself. Webber started the music and they began the 9 minute long pas de deux. Again, their dancing and acting enchanted everyone, but halfway through the dance, during a lift where she had to wrap her arms tightly around Derek, Meredith realized she wasn't acting anymore. By the time she was in a pose on the floor, her back arched with her head tilted back, with Romeo about to give Juliet her first kiss, she knew she wasn't acting anymore.

The rest of the pas de deux was a blur, and suddenly she was standing on the chair once again, Juliet desperately waving goodnight to Romeo, who was sadly waving goodnight to Juliet. Webber gave the pair feedback and dismissed them, calling for the corps to rehearse their next dance. And so on and on it went.

* * *

They spent two weeks learning and rehearsing Romeo and Juliet, while rehearsing and performing other ballets as well. Meredith couldn't remember a time when she had been more tired. It felt like she was walking through life like a zombie on autopilot, doing the things she knew she had to do but not remembering that she did them. It helped, though, that Derek was there to guide her and be helpful, almost as if he were her boyfriend…,which she wished he was.

On the day of opening night, Cristina caught her gazing wistfully at Derek, and pinched her arm.

"Ow! What the hell was that for? Now I have a bruise to cover up before tonight's show," she complained, rubbing her arm that was already bruising.

"You're staring at Derek," she replied, and Meredith crinkled up her nose.

"So?" she replied, shrugging her shoulders. "He's my partner. We dance together. We make magic together, according to everyone. And we kiss. A lot. On dance. Off stage…Oh god Cristina I think I'm falling in love with him," she admitted to her, looking helpless. Cristina could only shake her head.

"Well. You could do a lot worse than McDreamy," she teased her, stepping by to rehearse one of her parts.

* * *

It was an hour before showtime and Meredith was pacing back and forth in the dressing room. She was already clad in Juliet's first dress, a lavender nightgown, and the dresser had come to do her hair. It was arranged beautifully in two French braids wrapped around her head, with two sparkling rhinestone combs tucked in. She was going over steps in her head with her eyes closed, marking them in the small space of the dressing room, terrified she'd forget them. It was her first time in a principal role and she was freaking out.

Half an hour before showtime she grabbed her pointe shoes for tonight's show and made her way to the wings. Everyone parted to make way for her; tonight she was the star. She rubbed rosin on her heels and slid her feet into her shoes, lacing them and putting a single stitch into the knot so they wouldn't unravel as she danced, and dipped her toes into the rosin. Stretching at the barre, she felt a million butterflies in her stomach and willed them to calm down. Tonight had to go right, there were so many people banking on this going right. Webber had complete faith in her and there were so many critics in the audience waiting to tear her apart.

With two minutes to go, Meredith was doing her regular jumps in the wings, with Derek by her side. The stage manager yelled for everyone to take their places, and suddenly the ballet had begun. She took deep breaths; her first entrance wasn't for twenty more minutes but she was freaking out inside. Derek rubbed her arms, kissing her cheeks and doing his best to calm her before he made his first entrance, and suddenly she was alone. She knew she could do this, she had to do this. When April ran on as her nursemaid, Meredith plastered on her biggest smile and ran on stage, striking her first pose, dancing on autopilot.

* * *

As the corps took their bows, Meredith waited in the wings, biding her time until it was her time to bow. Next came the soloist roles, then the principals, and finally, she and Derek were running out at the same time, joining hands as he bowed and she curtsied. She couldn't stop smiling and laughing and neither could he, as they received a standing ovation from the audience. For the next ten minutes the entire cast continued to bow and curtsy, with Webber coming out on stage and presenting Meredith and Derek heavy bouquets of roses.

Once they finally closed the curtain, Meredith stood on the stage in absolute disbelief. She had survived her first principal role, and the crowd had loved her. She felt a hand on her arm and she turned to meet Derek, throwing her arms around him as he picked her up and spun her around.

"We did it!" she screamed out above the noise, locking lips with him as she was on the ground again. She didn't care if the whole company saw anymore, Derek was practically hers. "Come home with me tonight," she whispered to him, unable to wipe the smile off her face. She was on a complete high.

He responded with another kiss and she lost herself completely in the moment as everyone around them celebrated a great first show.

* * *

Later that night, after the sweat and makeup had been washed off by a lot of soap and water, Meredith and Derek lay on her bed, relaxing with her computer between them. Every few seconds they would constantly refresh the Seattle Times website, waiting for the review to pop up. It was already one in the morning and they had another show tomorrow but Meredith didn't care; this was her budding career.

Finally, after another hour, Meredith hit refresh and shrieked.

"DEREK IT'S THERE! I CAN'T LOOK AT IT!" she cried out, burying her head in her pillow. He couldn't help but laugh and shake his head.

"Give me your laptop, I'll read it to you," he grinned, grabbing her MacBook from it's place between them. He scanned the article, grinning more and more as he read it.

"Okay," he said, clearing his throat. "Pacific Northwest Ballet has done it again, bringing to life a wonderful Shakespeare classic. Derek Shepherd once again has proven his worth in the title role of Romeo, but it was newly hired corps member Meredith Grey who shined bright as Juliet Capulet. Miss Grey brings a sense of happy youth to the role, able to nail the complex emotions of Juliet while hitting all of her steps without fail. Grey and Shepherd, meanwhile, exude chemistry not seen since Fonteyn and Nureyev. Watching the pair dance together is simply stunning, and we hope to see more collaborations between the two."

Meredith emerged from her pillow looking awestruck; her green eyes opened wide, her blonde hair tumbling over her shoulders.

"They actually liked me? I mean. They don't know me. I'm an actual nobody. And they liked me?" she asked in disbelief. Derek shut the laptop and closed the gap between them.

"Mere, they loved you. You're the perfect Juliet, they said so in the review. And now, you are no longer a nobody. You are a somebody named Meredith Grey, and they want more of you. And us. And Webber is going to give it to you," he grinned as he hovered over her. She couldn't stop the smile from spreading across her face as she looked up at him, her breathing quickening.

"You know what I want right now?" she said seductively, pulling him on top of her and running her fingers through his ever-messy hair.

"Mmm what," he mumbled in her ear, trailing kisses down her neck.

"I want you to make love to me, because apparently we have fantastic chemistry and I'd like to test that out," she breathed. He didn't have to be asked twice as he inched her tank top over her head, exposing her tight and toned ballet body. Pressing kissed down her chest and stomach, he inched her shorts off and her tiny little panties, and soon the two of them were lost in each other.

* * *

 **So this chapter ended up being super long and I'm sorry I rambled so much! I just really really love ballet and it comes to natural for me XD. I watched the 2009 Peter Martins New York City Ballet version of Romeo and Juliet version of the ballet to get a better sense of everything, which is why the rehearsal scenes are so descriptive - if you want me to, I can edit this and put the link to it in here, or link it in my bio!**

 **I was excited to finally give Meredith and Derek a chance to dance together and make some magic on the stage, and finally get together :) Now that they're together and the critics (and Webber) love them, there will be a lot more MerDer scenes! I have plans for Addison as well, and for a bunch of characters I haven't introduced yet.**

 **As always, please please read and review! If you have questions about anything don't hesitate to ask! I love you guys!**


	6. Dance of the Reed Flutes

Romeo and Juliet ran three times a week through the middle of November. It had quickly become an audience favorite, and Meredith relished the time she spent in the lead role, dancing with Derek as much as she was, not only as his pas de deux partner, but also as his girlfriend. The reviews kept coming in with nothing negative said about either one about them. Webber of course was thrilled with his two stars, not the mention the entire company who made the ballet what it was. Without all of them it wouldn't be what it was.

Soon after Romeo and Juliet had ended, Meredith had received a package in the mail from her mother. Upon opening the parcel that had been cleared by customs, she found a familiar blue box from Tiffany's, tied with a crisp white bow. Inside was a thin silver chain with a single pink ballet slipper on it. Accompanying it was a card:

 _Dearest Meredith,_

 _Word of your spectacular performance in Romeo and Juliet has reached me here in London. I only wish I had had the chance to see you in person. Perhaps it will be one of the ballets Richard chooses to take on tour over the summer. From the wonderful reviews I've read, it seems that you are anything but ordinary, and I never want you to forget that. Merde._

 _xx_

 _Ellis_

Meredith was stunned that her mother had done such a thing, had given her such a sentimental gift and written such lovely words to her. There was no mistaking it; the card was in her mother's careful script. Perhaps they could have a relationship after all.

* * *

The Tuesday after the end of Romeo and Juliet's run, Meredith arrived at the studio only to find a crowd around the bulletin board again. Crap, she had forgotten that Nutcracker casting had gone up today. Cristina wormed her way out of the crowd and jumped at Meredith, a grin on her face.

"I'm a Snow soloist and Waltz corps!" she grinned, bouncing up and down. Meredith's eyes went wide; Cristina didn't bounce up and down, she was not the type of person to bounce up and down at anything.

"Congratulations!" she grinned, throwing her arm around her friend. "Did you see what I am?" she asked, as Cristina shrugged her shoulders.

"Everyone was pushing, it was too hard to look," she sighed. "I'll see you in the studio?" she said, and Meredith nodded, prepared to head into the crowd. Meredith finally made her way to the front with great difficulty and found finally was able to scan the list.

CLARA Amelia Shepherd

SUGAR PLUM FAIRY Addison Montgomery

CAVALIER Derek Shepherd

NUTCRACKER PRINCE Jackson Avery

SNOW QUEEN Calliope Torres

DEW DROP FAIRY Theodora Altman

ARABIAN FEMALE Arizona Robbins

ARABIAN MALE Mark Sloan

MOTHER GINGER George O'Malley

MOUSE KING Alex Karev

RUSSIAN LEAD Preston Burke

HARLQUINN DOLL April Kepner

SOLDIER DOLL Isobel Stevens

COLOMBINE DOLL Sadie Harris

SNOW SOLOIST Meredith Grey

SNOW SOLOIST Cristina Yang

SNOW CORPS April Kepner, Isobel Stevens, Sadie Harris, Megan Mostow, Graciela Guzman, Sydney Heron, Heather Brooks, Josephine Wilson, Stephanie Edwards, Leah Murphy, Reed Adamson, and Olivia Harper.

WALTZ CORPS Meredith Grey, Cristina Yang, April Kepner, Isobel Stevens, Sadie Harris, Megan Mostow, Graciela Guzman, Sydney Heron, Heather Brooks, Josephine Wilson, Stephanie Edwards, Leah Murphy, Reed Adamson, and Olivia Harper.

SPANISH Lucy Fields, Isobel Stevens, and Josephine Wilson

CHINESE Ben Warren and Leah Murphy

MARZIPAN LEAD Meredith Grey

MARZIPAN CORPS Sadie Harris, Graciela Guzman, and Stephanie Edwards

PARTY ADULTS Entire Cast

ANGELS PNB Students

PARTY GIRLS AND BOYS PNB Students

POLICHINELLES PNB Students

CANDY CANES PNB Students

Meredith couldn't believe how much she had lucked out; three roles! And one was a soloist role! She broke away from the list with a huge smile on her face as she headed into the studio to begin class for the day.

* * *

Dancing Waltz of the Snowflakes was like running through hell, Meredith decided. It was six and a half minutes of pure hell. Running on and off stage, jumping, turning, leaping, running into different formations…she was out of breath within the first minutes, and all fourteen girls were cursing under their breath as they tried to pace themselves and failed. Callie was their snow queen and Meredith had to admit, she was perfect for the role. Amelia wove in and out of the girls formations with her Nutcracker prince, imitating their movements as she went, acting the part of young and amazed Clara. As they neared the four-minute mark and the music started to break down, Meredith literally thought she was dying, but no, she had to run and follow the other girls into a diagonal before the music became more forgiving. Finally they struck their final pose and she tried to catch her breath, dripping with sweat. She hardly dared to look up, when she heard Mistress Bailey say the dreaded words. "I'd like to see that again, ladies…" She let out a frustrated groan and stood up, moving back to her opening pose.

Finally Snow was dismissed and Meredith slid down the wall by the barres, utterly spent. Sweat was pouring down her body and she closed her eyes for a minute, trying to regain control over her body after running through the dance several times. She felt someone sit beside her and she opened her eyes to see Derek, and she couldn't help but lay her head on his shoulder.

"Nutcracker is so much fun when you're a kid. When you're an adult it just seems like a chore," she pouted to him, wrinkling her nose. He couldn't help but laugh at how jaded she sounded.

"Cheer up buttercup, you're eighteen. You have like, twenty five years of this left," he teased her. She poked him in the cheek and he responded by pulling a bobby pin out of her hair.

"Hey! That's not fair, there's nothing to pull out of your hair," she giggled, as she watched Clara and her Prince's arrival to the enchanted land of sweets. She had to admit, Amelia looked young enough to play Clara. Soon enough the Spanish dancers were rehearsing as Meredith watched, still recovering from Snow. Arabian came after Spanish, then Chinese, then Candy Canes, which was mostly children who hadn't been pulled in yet from the PNB School. After candy canes came Marzipan, and Meredith had to force herself to get up. Everything hurt and she was absolutely exhausted.

Bringing herself to the center of the floor, she stood in b plus with the set of reed flutes in her hands, the way the choreography called for. When the marzipan music started she sprang to life, executing each step as she had been taught, with her corps of Sadie, Graciela, and Stephanie behind her. She knew Sadie from her days at the Royal; she had been a class behind her and now she was here as an apprentice. Meredith took great care with the meticulous choreography, grateful that it was just a lot of clean and neat pointe work and extensions with a few small jumps here and there. All in all, the dance wasn't taxing and she struck her ending pose en pointe, her corps surrounding their shepherdess as she smiled towards Bailey and Webber. They were pleased with the performance but had them run it several times just to work out a few kinks. Once they were pleased, Meredith fled back to the bar and plopped back down next to Derek with a sigh. He wrapped his arm around her, smiling.

"You really do make magic out there," he told her, and she wrinkled her nose with a shake of her head.

"I'm just another girl in a ballet company, I'm expendable," she whispered to him over the music of Mother Ginger. They had the PNB students today and they looked so excited to be dancing with the company members. Meredith couldn't help but giggle at George.

"If you were expendable they wouldn't have given you two soloist roles," he teased her with a roll of his eyes. Meredith tugged at his hair and laughed.

"Oh hush, McDreamy," she teased him, nuzzling his nose for a moment before going in for a kiss. In no time at all, Mother Ginger was finished and Waltz of the Flowers was called to the center. Meredith stood up once again and prepared herself for another six and a half minute dance. The girls were given places offstage and cues to enter on and the dance began. Teddy was their Dew Drop and the flowers danced around her, creating beautiful formations and steps. Meredith grew dizzy with the amount of waltz turns, no matter how many times she spotted them, but the dance had always been one of her favorites no matter how many times she had seen the ballet. She was out of breath again and knew she needed to start going to the gym to build up her stamina for these long dances. Once she heard the chords of the final strains of the music, she sauted into an arabesque and gently slid down on her knee, crossing her arms in front of a chest and forcing a smile, no matter how hard she was breathing. The key to dancing a long, knock-the-wind-out-of-you dance was to always keep smiling, show that you were okay and ready to take on whatever was thrown at you. Webber gave the okay nod, before dismissing the fourteen corps members.

Sugar plum was next, surrounded by her angels (who were not there that day), so Addison did her famous dance by herself. Immediately after was the pas de deux between Sugar Plum and her Cavalier, which Meredith watched and silently seethed at from under the barre. She noticed that Addison and Derek didn't have as much chemistry as they had when she'd first joined the company a few months ago, and it made her smile inwardly. Once they were finished, the entire cast was called to the floor for the finale. Meredith had to do Marzipan instead of Waltz but she didn't mind; she liked being recognized for her Soloist role instead. They ran through it a few times and then they were finished rehearsal for the day.

* * *

There were no shows for the next two weeks; the next show they were doing was the Nutcracker and they were supposed to be rehearsing and preparing. Meredith grabbed her things from under the barre, leaning against it and waiting for Derek. Both were sweaty messes and she smiled up at him, her hair falling out of its bun. She didn't care to fix it; class was over anyway.

"Are you coming over tonight?" she asked him casually with a smile. She loved the nights he came home with her; she hated being alone in the huge house. It made her feel even more alone than usual. She knew she should get roommates and fill up the numerous empty bedrooms…but right now she enjoyed bringing Derek home and having them have the huge house to themselves to do whatever they wanted.

"Of course I am," he ginned, lifting her chin to give her a kiss. "Let me grab some things from the trailer first okay? I need dance clothes for tomorrow and regular clothes."

Her face softened and she smiled, kissing him back.

"Just text me when you're on your way, I need to figure out dinner," she giggled, grabbing her water and leaving the studio, on her way to the dressing room to change. Once she was in her street clothes she grabbed her coat and headed downstairs to the parking lot. On her way she ran into a little girl who was looking at her with big eyes.

"Are you Meredith Grey?" the girl asked her, her eyes wide. Meredith smile and bent down a little bit.

"I am! Were you looking for me?" The little girl nodded and smiled.

"I'm one of the party girls in the scene – You play my aunt." Meredith giggled, her eyes crinkling. She could place the girl now, her name was Molly.

"Oh! You're Molly!" she smiled, reaching down and giving her a hug. "You're a really good dancer for a ten year old," she said with a smile. Molly's eyes widened with joy.

"Really? I'm trying to get my mom and dad to put me in the pre-professional program; it starts next year when you're eleven. My sister is in it but she thinks she's going to be made an apprentice soon, she's fifteen! She's a soldier in the battle scene, she just feels lucky that they cast her, both of us even!" Molly grinned excitedly. Meredith smiled at the excitement of the little girl.

"Push harder if you want to be like your sister," Meredith winked, straightening up. After a moment she reached into her bag and pulled out a completely dead pair of pointe shoes. They were probably old and smelly, but she knew she wouldn't care. She reached back into her bag and pulled out a sharpie, quickly signing her name on the box of both pairs, before handing them to the girl. "Here you go, your souvenir of your first Nutcracker," she said with a grin.

Molly could barely contain her excitement.

"Oh my gosh thank you Meredith!" she exclaimed, eyes lit up. "I get to go on pointe in January and I'm so excited!" she smiled, throwing her arms around Meredith again. "What's even cooler is we have the same last name!" she grinned, bouncing up and down. "My mom's here so I should go, but it was nice talking to you!" she said, running out the doors.

Meredith paled considerably as Molly said they had the same last name. It didn't take a genius to put two and two together.

* * *

 **Uh oh! Who did Meredith just meet!?**

 **I kind of had to reach into the vault of Grey's characters to round out the casting list and add people I didn't want to add until later on but i'll explain it in another chapter :)**

 **Please read and review!**


	7. Petit Galop

Meredith was in shock from her run in with little Molly Grey. She stood stock still at the door to the parking lot, her mouth opening and closing but not saying anything. People pushed past her, ignoring her, figuring she was going over something in her head. Well, they certainly weren't wrong. Finally, after what seemed like hours, Derek came up behind her and touched her arm lightly. "Meri, are you okay?" he asked her, and she looked up at him.

"I just met my little sister. One of them at least," she said, her voice barely a whisper. "She's ten. Her name is Molly and I play her aunt in the party scene," she said softly. "Not only that, but her older sister is an apprentice and a soldier," she said, tears pooling in her eyes. She didn't know why she was upset; she knew she had two sisters. She just didn't know how close they actually were. "I can stay away from the older one. I don't know her name or what she looks like. But I can't stay away from Molly, I'm cast with her and I'm a professional," she said, leaning in to Derek and burying her face in his chest. He held her close to him and let her cry, kissing her forehead.

"Come on, let's go back to your house and we'll cuddle in bed and watch a movie or something, and you'll make your list of roles and ballets you want to be in.." That seemed to perk her up, and they walked hand in hand through the rain to his car.

* * *

True to her word, Meredith had made a list of her dream roles that she wanted to dance. It had taken her a week to make the list; there were so many beautiful and perfect roles out there that she'd dreamed of dancing and narrowing them down to ten had been insanely difficult. Derek had offered to help one morning while was making her pancakes, but she knew she had to do this herself. She stared at the page in her notebook; she had written it in pen, in no particular order, so there was no going back.

Kitri

Aurora

Lilac Fairy

Esmerelda

Firebird

Giselle

Odette/Odile

La Sylphide

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland

La Bayadere

Meredith showed the list to Derek and he nodded his approval.

"And with many of those I could be your partner," he teased her, setting a plate of steaming pancakes in front of her. She slathered them with butter and syrup before digging in.

"These are amazing, how are you such a good cook?" she asked him, taking another bite.

"Four sisters. Four. Plus I've been on my own since I was seventeen," he shrugged, sitting down next to her at the table as they both ate and drank their coffee. They had 45 minutes to get to PNB and be ready for class, and then there was a day of endless Nutcracker rehearsals. Their first show opened in a week; they had 8 shows a week until New Years Eve, and there was no second cast. If someone got injured, the corps girls would have to double up or triple up on their roles.

"I grew up with a cook," she admitted, standing up with her empty plate to put it in the dishwasher. "A cook, a nanny, housekeepers. Because the great Ellis Grey didn't know how to be a mother. Did you know that she danced at PNB? Webber told me the other day. And I knew she danced in a company while she was pregnant with me, so I'm assuming it was PNB because I was born here," she said, leaning against the countertop and finishing up her cup of coffee and sticking her empty mug in the dishwasher with her plate. "And then suddenly when I was five, she divorced my father and we fled to London because she was offered a principal place in the Royal. She danced with Paris Opera for a bit, that's how I know how to speak French. I took ballet classes at the school there, but then she retired and was asked to be Mistress at the Royal," she said with a heavy sigh. She hadn't ever told anyone that much about her mother before, although she suspected Richard knew.

Derek nodded along as she spoke, washing off his own dishes and sticking them in the dishwasher.

"Ballet is in your blood, Meredith, kind of like your destiny," he teased her. "Come on, we don't want to be late," he said, grabbing her hand. They grabbed their coats and dance bags, Meredith's bigger and heavier than his because of her numerous pairs of pointe shoes, and they were out the door to his car and on their way to PNB.

* * *

As always, Nutcracker rehearsal was never ending. Today they didn't have the kids with them so they were able to skip a few of the dances like the angels, mother ginger, much of the party scene, a lot of the mice and soldiers, and the candy canes. They were doing the larger dances, the soloists, and the principal roles, which made up most of the company. The apprentices that had been called today, too. Meredith wasn't very fond of them but they rounded out the cast, so she couldn't complain, plus some of them were incredibly good. There was one in particular who was sweet; she knew Alex had her eye on her. Jo Wilson was English, which Meredith loved because the pair could sit for hours and talk about London together. She knew Jo from the Royal as well, but she was three years younger than Meredith was. She told Alex to leave her alone but to no avail.

Sitting on the side of the room with Cristina, she sighed as she watched Arizona and Mark's Arabian Pas de Deux.

"I wish I could dance like that one day," she sighed as she watched the pair.

Cristina looked at her point blank and raised an eyebrow.

"What!? They're perfect, Arizona is gorgeous. Her lines are absolutely beautiful, her back is so flexible." Meredith protested. Cristina shook her head again.

"It's true that we are our worst critic. Mer, you can outdance anyone in this company and everyone knows it. That's why no one will talk to you. You're inbred. You're the daughter of one of the greatest dancers of the past generation and it doesn't take a genius to see that you're following in her footsteps. I wouldn't be surprised if Webber promoted you after winter season, really, and didn't wait until the end of spring when he usually promotes people," she said, before sighing and standing up so that they could do snow.

She and Cristina were the soloists in snow, and as such they were on stage almost as much as Callie was. As she danced, she reflected upon what Cristina said. It was true; Izzie despised her for simply walking in and tenduing her foot with a perfect arch. April was jealous because she was getting soloist and principal roles when she used to. Amelia felt threatened because she was a soloist and Meredith was encroaching on her territory. Addison hated her simply for being in a relationship with Derek, when she had dumped him for Mark. At one point in the dance when her head was down, Meredith rolled her eyes at the insanity of it all, how it felt so juvenile and high school, but at the same time, no one in the company had ever gone to high school. Maybe that was the problem.

After Snow she had a few dances to regain her bearings before Marzipan was up. The dance wasn't difficult and once again, she was cool and collected and didn't get out of breath as she danced. She adored Marzipan though; it was a fun and articulated dance and you had to have a certain sense of artistry to do the particular style if demanded. Striking her final pose, Meredith finally dared to look in the mirror, knowing everyone's eyes were on her. Tough luck. She was good and she wasn't going to dumb down her dancing for anyone.

Bailey deemed the girls good enough; she didn't seem to want to run things much today, which was good, and Meredith retreated to the side once again, taking a sip of water. Mother Ginger should have been up next but since George was the only one here and he didn't actually dance, they skipped it. Meredith stretched out her legs on the barre, feeling like she'd blown out her calves, but it didn't matter. She'd run down to the PT room later. Flowers was next and she ran to the other side of the room to prepare for her entrance. As the music started and they got into the dance, she felt more like a wilted flower than one in full bloom. She was exhausted and drained; Thursday was Thanksgiving and the next night was opening night. She needed to pick up the pace and give the rehearsal her all. Taking a deep breath she plastered on a smile and threw her high energy into it, waltz turning in a circle with thirteen other girls, jumping, leaping, pirouetting, before finally taking her final pose. Waltz was the last group dance of the show and they were there to entertain. The flowers were shooed so that Addison could do Sugar Plum's dance, then there was the Pas, then the Tarantella, and the Coda. Meredith watched, wishing and hoping that someday, that would be her, that she would be the shining principal of PNB.

* * *

The week passed quickly and soon it was Thanksgiving. Most of the younger people in the company either lived in Seattle with their parents, or flew home to be with them. Meredith was not one of them, so she had decided that she was going to order chinese and watch old videos of her mother dancing on tv. That was, until, Wednesday after rehearsal Addison strode up to her.

"Meredith!" she said with a smile, and Meredith turned around with a brow raised. Addison was actually talking to her?

"Yes?" she questioned, suddenly anxious.

"So I know your mom lives in London and you're not doing anything for Thanksgiving so I was wondering if you'd like to come over to my apartment, Derek's invited too, and I know you don't know all of us that well and we'd all love to get to know you better." Meredith nodded with a smile on her face. She was being accepted into the inner circle of soloists and principals. She wasn't sure if it was because they liked her or found her threatening but now she had somewhere to be tomorrow.

"I'd love to come, Addison," she smiled, reaching out and touching the older girls arm.

"Alright! Dinner is at four but people usually come around one so we can drink and have fun," she smiled, before heading towards her dressing room to change. Meredith stood in the hallway, dumbstruck, until Derek came up behind her.

"You okay?" he asked, and Meredith nodded.

"Addison invited me for Thanksgiving. You too," she giggled.

"Ah, yes, Addison and her famous Thanksgivings. They're actually a ball, we're all so drunk we can't taste how terrible her cooking is," he teased. She couldn't help but laugh.

"Give me a second to change and then we'll go home?" Lately all Derek did was stay at her home, and she really couldn't complain about it. Half of his things were there, he would up with her in his arms, and they fell asleep telling stories from when they were growing up in ballet schools. She was falling so hard for him, it was ridiculous. She quickly changed out of her leotard and tights and into jeans and a long sleeved shirt, slipping her feet into ballet flats, before leaving her dressing room and finding Derek to go home. She was exhausted and was glad they had the day off tomorrow.

* * *

Thanksgiving morning was great. The pair were able to sleep in a bit longer than usual, and upon waking up they had waffles, which ended with them having a fight with the whipped cream. Laughing hysterically, they climbed the stairs again and took a shower together, Meredith teasing Derek by using her lavender shampoo on him.

Once her hair was dry, she pulled on a cream colored dress with a brown floral print to it, brown tights and a brown ankle boot. Her hair was so damaged from pulling it back all day, every day, so she straightened it and left it down. Slipping the necklace from her mother around her neck, she looked at herself in the floor length mirror and smiled. She still looked much younger than eighteen but oh well.

Derek came out of the bathroom dressed in dress pants and a buttondown and she smiled at him as he tugged her closer.

"Happy thanksgiving," he said with a smile and her smile widened.

"Happy thanksgiving," she returned, "Our first of hopefully manly," she giggled.

"Definitely many," he replied, leading her downstairs. It was raining outside, typical Seattle, and he slipped into his coat, handing her hers. She pulled it on and followed him out to his car. Addison lived downtown, not too far from Meredith's house, so it was a short drive. He parked in the lot behind her building and they walked in, riding the elevator up to her apartment and knocking on the door. Mark answered, welcoming them inside.

"Well well, it's the corps girl," he smirked, and Meredith rolled her eyes. She hated being called that. "I'm so much more than a corps girl," she retorted, brushing by him with her newfound air of confidence, the one that had gotten her through twenty shows of Romeo and Juliet. Mark looked after her, slightly shocked, shaking his head a bit.

Meredith found Amelia on the sofa, grinning up at her.

"You just stood up to Mark? I've been wanting to do that my entire life, he grew up with us in our goddamn house and he's an arrogant asshole," she laughed. Meredith decided now was as good a time as any to sit down and get to know her boyfriends little sister.

"He really is an arrogant asshole. Brilliant to partner with but I wonder if that's just his insanely inflated ego, or if he really is that good," she giggled, looking up when Derek handed her a glass of wine, before going back to talk to the wounded Mark. Meredith smirked and turned back to Amelia. "So when did you join PNB? I hear so much about you from everyone else, but I realized I've never actually spoken to you," Meredith said shyly. Amelia smied.

"I went to the Jacquline Kennedy Onasis school most of my life and they offered me a position with the company, but my sister was already with American Ballet Theater. So I was an evil little sister and auditioned here and got in. Everyone says they're going to make me a principal but who knows? Addison would blow a gasket though," she grinned, sipping on her own wine. Meredith looked down at her lap.

"There's rumors I'll be promoted after Nutcracker," she whispered, taking a long drink. "I don't know how true they are, they never promote in the middle of the year!" she exclaimed, her eyes wide. Amelia grinned and slung her arm around her shoulder.

"Girl, have you seen yourself dance? You should've been hired as a principal straight away." Meredith laughed and shook her head, blonde hair flying.

"No, totally not true."

"You're so your mothers daughter."

"Oh my god Amelia take it back!"

It was so easy to talk to Amelia, it was like the pair had known each other their entire lives and she felt so comfortable talking to her, she loved it. Plus, she was the only other person at the party who wasn't a principal. Yet. They two girls chatted all afternoon and soon were best friends. Eventually Addison announced it was time for dinner and Amelia and Meredith headed to the table, arm in arm, Derek sitting on Meredith's other side.

The food actually wasn't terrible, so she knew Derek had been exaggerating, and everyone was eager to get to know Meredith outside the studio. They were all half drunk and open books, so it was fun answering questions and asking them. She learned that Callie was from Spain, Arizona had a brother in the Army, Teddy and Owen were dating, Erica grew up on a farm in Idaho of all places, and Burke was from Baltimore and went to the Washington Ballet School. Everyone kept peppering her with questions about Ellis Grey and the Royal ballet and she kept laughing, insisting there was nothing to tell, besides the fact that Ellis was cold and tough, and the Royal was just like any other ballet school, except they had exams and followed a syllabus and she hated the style of dancing and much preferred Vagonava. RAD just wasn't her cup of tea. After questioning Meredith they all started sharing stories from ballet school, each one worse than the next. By the end of the night they were all crying from laughter, and Meredith hugged Addison goodbye.

"Thank you so much for inviting me tonight, I needed this," she grinned, as she and Derek departed for her house.

* * *

The next day they rose bright and early at 6 am, having to be in the studio by 7 for warm up. The company was in one studio, while the children were in another taking class. After classes were finished they had a complete dress rehearsal that would take up to 4PM, and the show started at 7.

Meredith couldn't help but laugh as she and Cristina twirled around onstage in their ballgowns and hoopskirts, character shoes on their feet. The curtain was up but no one was in the audience. The stage was set and this was about to be fun. Soon enough more dancers joined them on the stage and they stopped twirling, but mingled with their fellow company members. The only one who wasn't in the scene was Addison, but Amelia made her way over to Meredith in her Clara costume and pointe shoes.

"You look adorable!" Meredith giggled, fingering the pink velvet dress that came with a very fluffy petticoat and a set of pink ribbon trimmed bloomers. Amelia rolled her eyes and tugged on one of her expertly curled curls.

"I look thirteen. I mean, I'm supposed to look thirteen, but I LOOK thirteen, you know?" and both girls laughed. Webber suddenly came into the theater and sat down, clapping his hands.

"Places everyone!" he shouted, and Meredith and Amelia ran off the stage. The orchestra started the familiar intro music, and when it was their time, Clara and Fritz skipped onto the stage. The part scene had begun

* * *

After the party scene, the corps girls and Callie made a mad dash for their dressing rooms to change for Snow. They had enough time, but they always felt like there was never enough time. Meredith stripped off her Party costume and left it in a heap on the floor, wiggling into her tutu for Snow, fumbling with the bobby pins needed for her tiara. She had to change her makeup a bit, using blues, whites, and silvers for her eyeshadow, dusting her shoulders with shimmer and glitter so she was more ethereal and snowflake like. After tying her pointe shoes and stitching them on, she ran back to the stage area and dipped herself in the rosin box. Clara the the Nutcracker prince were doing their Pas in the winter scene. She took her spot in the front wing, opposite Cristina. They were the first two on in the entire dance as soloists, and as Clara and her prince exited, Cristina and Meredith did a sauté, pas de chat, into a soutenu turn. Everyone else took their cues from them. What Meredith loathed, however, was when the fake snow started falling from the rafters of the theater. It got everywhere. In her hair, in her mouth, down the front of her costume. It was almost blinding. There were parts where Clara danced between her and Cristina and she smiled as she caught Amelia's eye as they moved seamlessly together. Callie did a spectacular job in her lead role and the dance went off a hitch, except of course there was fake snow everywhere.

Meredith did a quick change into her Marzipan costume, grabbing the set of reed flutes that went along with it and stood backstage, waiting for act two to start. The angels were adorable, and Addison made her spectacular debut with jumps higher than Meredith could ever imagine doing. She found herself growing jealous – of what, Addison? She thought. She had everything that Addison wanted – a body predisposed for ballet, Derek, and a title of ballet royalty. But she wanted to get fantastic featured roles.

Soon enough her dance was on, and as she and her corps bowed to Sugar Plum, the music started. Despite her corps dancers being apprentices, they were spectacular and performed to Webber's standards. Once the music was over, they curtsied to Sugar Plum again, running off. Mother Ginger was next, and Meredith had a quick change into Waltz of the Flowers. She pulled on the fluffy, layered pink gown, another tiara fixed to her head before she ran back upstairs just in time for the dance. Making her entrance, she danced her heart and soul out, putting her everything into the dance. She knew Webber was watching her every move. Once flowers was over, they exited the stage and the entire company jostled to watch Addison and Derek perform the grand pas. Once It was over, there was the finale, and then everyone took their bows.

And then it was over. Webber had no complaints, he didn't want anyone to go over another dance. He stood up and clapped his hands with a smile.

"Ladies and gentleman, that was great. You have a few hours before the show, use it wisely. Eat, hydrate, keep your bodies warm. I'll see you back here at five."

Meredith couldn't believe it and quickly ran up to Derek, he still dressed as the Cavalier and she dressed as a flower. She grinned and threw her arms around him, accidentally showering him with glitter.

"That was great!" she laughed, as he laughed into her tiara. "I really want chinese takeout because I don't feel like leaving this building," she smirked.

"You should probably take off your costume, don't want to damage PNB property," he laughed at her, and she did the same.

"Hey, I'm not the one wearing all white," she pointed out, as Amelia came up to them, wearing a white sleeveless nightgown for Clara.

"What are you guys doing? I don't feel like leaving," she said, and Mere rolled her eyes.

"We literally just had this conversation, we're getting takeout chinese, we're eating it in whoever has the cleanest dressing room," she laughed as she started to walk backstage. Once she was in her dressing room she got out of her flowers costume, taking off the tiara and pulling on sweats and her down-filled booties before finding Derek in Amelia's dressing room. She shared it with Callie and Arizona. "Yours is the cleanest, you're hosting the dinner party," she laughed.

* * *

At 7PM sharp, the show started. Meredith was nervous but fortunately, no one messed up, not even the young children. She was still nervous about Molly Grey, and wondered which one of the soldiers was her other sister, but she was quick to brush it off. She got lost in the music and the dance and let herself have fun. Even during snow, when she had to hold those obnoxious pom poms and be showered in one ton of fake snow, she couldn't believe that she was on the PNB stage, doing what she loved. When it came time for Marzipan she made sure she shined bright, trying to impress any critics in the audience who might remember her and write a review again. But it was during Waltz that she truly lost herself in the steps of the six and a half minute song, soaring across the stage with every leap, landing every pirouette gracefully, and flicking her arms and hands just right. When it came time for the soloists to take their bows she realized she was a part of them, having danced two soloists parts, and as Marzipan she took a deep curtsy, her smile outshining the stage lights.

* * *

 **Oh my god this is the first time I've written over 4000 words! Eek! And I just updated yesterday too! This story isn't getting many reviews; if there's something you're not liking please let me know!**

I have plans for Meredith and plans for Lexie so just hold tight! I write really fast so ;)


	8. Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy

The company was two weeks into their 5 week run of The Nutcracker. At this point, Meredith could dance her parts in her sleep, as well as several others as she'd had to sub for some of the girls who'd injured themselves. It was a crazy time but she was so used to the pressure, especially coming from a RAD curriculum where she had to do ballet exams. Her calf muscles were blown, her hair was crunchy from hairspray and gel that never seemed to wash out anymore, she'd gone through almost an entre spool of thread, and in just two weeks, twenty pairs of pointe shoes. She was almost sewing shoes; it had gotten so bad that she was sewing shoes in bed at night, while Derek was sleeping beside her. She always had three new pairs ready to go for the next day. Thank god she didn't have to pay for her shoes, or she'd be completely broke.

Class was always a chore in the afternoons; barre space was taken by eager apprentices, although the principals always intimidated them into taking the portable barres. Meredith was comfortable with her position at the barre, right in front of Derek, although there was an annoyingly peppy brunette girl who had taken to standing in front of her. The PNB students were in the smaller studio, and Meredith was happy to be free from them just for class.

* * *

It was a normal Wednesday night and Meredith was backstage hanging out with Derek during intermission. More like she was picking fake snow out of her hair as she tried to get into Marzipan, and switching out a dead pair of pointe shoes for 'alive' ones. He laughed as she threw the dead ones at her theater case.

"I swear, I'm going to make a Christmas tree in the house out of dead, smelly pointe shoes one day," she laughed, slumping down to the floor, her tutu flaring out around her. It wasn't a stiff classical one, but more fluffy and shepherdess like, and she had a hat on her head that was not only pinned in place, but tied under her chin. Derek kept bopping it and she kept scowling, smacking him with her reed flutes, the ribbons trailing behind, before she resorted to kicking him with her new, very hard pointe shoes.

"Ow!" he yelled out with a small laugh, looking at her. "Oh this is war," he declared, before they heard the stage manager call five minutes. Both of them scrambled up and ran upstairs to the stage. She coated her shoes with rosin and took her position in the front wing for the opening, her tutu bouncing as she curtsied to Clara and her prince, flashing Amelia a wide smile before rushing off again. It seemed like no time before Marzipan was on, and she danced almost robotically, the steps ingrained in her muscle memory. Derek was in the wings as she ran off and downstairs for her quick change. Shepherdess dress and hat off, pink fluffy tutu dress on, tiara pinned tightly to her head. She ran back upstairs in less than five minutes where Derek handed her water and she drank it, trying to catch her breath, before moving to the front wing again.

Plastering a smile on her face and trying to pretend she didn't want to fall over, she somehow made it through six and a half minutes of Waltz of the Flowers without keeling over. Rushing off stage she saw the angels making their formation, and Addison taking her first leap onto the stage. She could hear it though; she had landed wrong and as she turned, she could see that Addison was grimacing and struggling to get through the dance. Everyone in the wings was murmuring and Derek came up behind Meredith.

"I heard a snap," Meredith said quietly, just to Derek. If it was her achillies, she was done forever. Gone, in an instant, her career was dead at 27. Meredith could watch her dragging her left foot slightly, trying to get on with the dance. It wasn't too long and she struck a pose. Derek was supposed to run on right away but Webber must've sent a message to the orchestra, because Addison curtsied and ran off to the wings before collapsing on the floor.

"What is it Addison?" Webber demanded. Addison was on the floor of the wings, tears streaming down her face. Meredith hung back slightly, not wanting to be in the way. Someone cut her pointe shoe off and rolled back her tights; her ankle was three times it's normal size and black and blue. She couldn't go on, and she certainly wouldn't be dancing anytime soon. She was absolutely hysterical.

"I think I snapped my achillies," she sobbed, trying to move her left foot but it just dangled limply. PT was already on their way to help her, and an ambulance had been called. Webber looked around at the wings, looking for a replacement, before his eyes settled on Meredith,

"Meredith, do you know the Grand Pas and the Coda?" he asked her. Meredith looked up in shock her eyes wide, but she quickly nodded.

"Y-y-yes sir, I do. I mean, I do know them, sir," she stammered. In the next moment someone was helping her out of her Flowers costume, and helping her into the Sugar Plum costume. The costume was an absolute dream, of pinks and purples blended together, carefully beaded, with crystals dripping off of the tutu and bodice. An ornate tiara was pinned to her head, and Bailey deemed her perfect. Derek squeezed her hand, and suddenly they were both rushing onto the stage, the orchestra waiting no longer. Meredith hit the beginning pose, and somehow she knew the Pas. Any time she hesitated, Derek would whisper the next step in her ear and she would move on, having gotten through it. She was holding her breath the entire time, terrified she was going to make a horrible mistake and mess up the entire end of the ballet. Somehow though she made it through, with Derek lifting her in a beautiful backbend, sailing through the air, then throwing her, catching her, and dipping her into an impressive fishdive, the two of them all smiles. He placed her back on her feet and she curtsied, before running off the stage to get ready for the Coda as he danced the Tarantella. Webber grabbed her as she moved to the back wing and gave her a smile.

"That was beautiful, Meredith. I want to talk to you in my office before you leave tonight." Meredith merely nodded, on a complete high right now. She watched Derek dancing, admiring his form and how wonderfully beautiful he was when he danced. When the coda started, she watched his spectacular jumps, before it was her turn. She did soutenu turn after soutenu turn, until she had turned diagonally from one end of the stage to the other. It was then that the pair synced up, jumping and turning through the air, Derek grabbing Meredith and making her soar. She couldn't imagine why people did drugs when they could dance. Finally they took their ending poses, the two of them kneeling towards the audience. The crowd went wild with a standing ovation as they stood up, bowing and curtsying, Meredith bourreing backwards as she began to dismiss the Sweets, saying goodbye to Clara, and the curtain eventually closing.

* * *

Meredith was on a complete high as she made her way to Webber's office. He had been smiling; this couldn't be bad, right? Peeking in the doorway, she knocked lightly.

"You asked for me, Master Webber?" she said lightly, toying with one of the dangling beadings on the tutu.

"I did Meredith, come and sit." She stepped inside and shut the door, attempting to sit in one of the chairs in her large tutu.

"Meredith, you and I both know that you are immensely talented. You're gifted, even. Someone like you comes along once in a generation. You can pick up choreography on sight, you know exactly what you're doing and when, and if we throw you into a role you're prepared for it." He paused, studying her. She was calm and collected, despite having literally been thrown on stage. "Addison Montgomery will be out the rest of the year. Tonight you demonstrated that you knew her choreography and you stayed calm under pressure. I would like you to take over her role as Sugar Plum Fairy for the remaining shows. You can keep your role as Soloist in Snow, but I would like you to be Sugar Plum. Addison's career is effectively over; her achillies is snapped."

Meredith couldn't believe what she was hearing. She was Sugar Plum Fairy. She now had Addison's role. She was dancing with Derek again. She took a deep breath.

"I think I can make that work," she breathed, smiling confidently at him.

* * *

The rest of Nutcracker season went brilliantly. It was actually a load off of Meredith's back, only doing two roles instead of three. They gave an apprentice her Flowers role, and Cristina was given her Marzipan role. On closing night, she and Derek took their final bows together, pleased to have been given more time to dance together.

Later that evening, at the gala affair celebrating New Years Eve and the end of Nutcracker, Meredith stood with Mark, Derek, and Amelia, clad in heels and a plunging neck dress. She swore she didn't know half the people around her, or maybe that was because they were dressed up and wearing makeup. She saw Webber making his way over to them and she tossed back her glass of champagne, hiding it behind Derek's.

"Congratulations Amelia, Meredith," he said, handing the two girls envelopes. They eyed each other curiously, thanking him, before opening their envelopes.

"Oh my god," Meredith said, at the same time as Amelia. She looked up at her friend, before looking up at Derek, her eyes shining.

"I got promoted to soloist," she announced, grabbing one of the champagne flutes off the table.

"And I got promoted to principal," Amelia breathed, eyes wide. Derek wrapped his arms around Meredith tightly, kissing the top of her head, before hugging his sister tightly.

"I knew you guys could do it, and I knew he'd do it mid-season," Mark grinned, calling for more champagne.

Meredith was more than happy with this change, although it seemed that Amelia had taken Addison's job and Meredith had taken Amelia's job. She could only wonder who took her job, but it didn't matter right now.

"Come on, it's almost midnight," she grinned, grabbing Derek's arm and leading the group to one of the hotel suite's balcony's. It was freezing but she didn't care. Midnight hit a few minutes later and the night sky blew up with fireworks. "Happy New Year Derek," she grinned, locking him in their first kiss of the new year. New year, new beginnings.

* * *

After the new year, the company had two weeks off to rest up and recover before diving back into ballet. Meredith and Derek travelled to San Fransisco, where of course they ended up taking ballet classes with the company there, among other things. Upon arriving home Meredith was moved into a new dressing room, sharing it with Arizona, Callie, and Amelia. She was more why around Arizona and Callie, who were dating, but soon she was comfortable with them, starting just that morning. The four girls got ready together, and Meredith was giddy with anticipation. Rushing to the studio for class, Meredith took her usual spot at the barre, in front to Derek who gave her a kiss.

"Merde on your first day as Soloist!" he grinned, giving her butt a pinch.

"Oh, I do believe that's harassment in the workplace," she teased him, as plies started. The class was typical, one that she'd gotten used to since September, except today she was part of the first group in the center instead of the second. She was encouraged to do more difficult things en pointe and she took it as a challenge, completing everything. She noticed there were a few new boys and girls in the corps; the apprentices really had their own class, but it didn't bother her. After class Webber held them back and made a small speech.

"I'd like to welcome you all back to the Spring Season of PNB. There's some new faces in the corps, I encourage you all to be welcoming to them all. I hope you too the break to rest up as we have a busy repotroie this season. The rehearsal list is posted in the hallway and please, don't shed any blood when getting to it,"

With that, the dancers dashed out of the studio and to the casting list. Amelia and Meredith pushed their way to the front. Amelia's eyes shone.

"I'm rehearsing Odette and Odile, and Coppelia!" she exclaimed. Meredith's eyes were just as wide.

"I'm understudying you, and I'm learning Rubies, Aurora, and lilac fairy!" she squealed, the two girls jumping and hugging one another, before running off back to the studio to rehearse. Meredith had Rubies right now so she headed into the studio, and of course Derek was her partner. There was a corps for the dance, but they'd be learning it on their own before adding the corps. This was one of Meredith's favorite dances and she was thrilled to have been called to rehearse it. She and Derek would be making magic once again.

* * *

After a busy and intense rehearsal, Meredith was about to leave the studio when she was stopped by a pretty brunette, about her size and shape. She had clear blue eyes that reminded her of something she felt like she'd known a lifetime.

"You're Meredith Grey, aren't you?" she asked her, and Meredith nodded slightly. The girl was in the corps of rubies; she didn't know how she had lucked out if she was a new corps member.

"Yes, I'm Meredith, she said, straightening up and pulling her sweatshirt over her head to keep warm. There were other rehearsals later in and she needed to busy hersef and keep warm.

"I'm Lexie. Um. Lexie Grey," she pretty brunette said, and a surge of anger built up inside Meredith. Of course this was Lexie. Of course she was made the new corps girl. Meredith's breath caught in her throat as she continued. "I'm your sister, I guess, at least we have the same dad." Meredith cut her off.

"No, we don't have the same dad. My dad left my life when I was five and I haven't seen or heard a word from him since. I grew up in London with an English accent, working my way through the Royal. I lived in Paris with my mother when she was Prima at the Paris Opera. My dad wasn't there for any of that. I grew up with nannies and every luxury I could every want because I had no dad to come home and take care of me at the end of the day and luckily my successful mother had the sense not to completely neglect her child so she hired people to take care of me so she didn't have to. So no, we don't have the same dad. He left when I was five. And you are not my sister, so stay out of my way. I rank higher than you here and I can make your life a living hell," she said, turning on her heels with a swish of her short black skirt, retreating to her dressing room to stretching and thinking about life.

Derek found her soon after as she was stretching out her oversplits in front of the wall-sized mirror in her dressing room, trying to take deep, cleansing breaths. Rolling her ankles out within the band she sighed, rolling her neck out as well. Derek looked down and could tell she was upset.

"What's wrong babe?" he asked her, and she looked up.

"Remember how I have another sister? I just met her and she's in Rubies with her," she grumbled, pulling her legs back even further. She crossed her arms over her chest, a scowl on her face. He sighed, reaching down and kissing her.

"Webber must've promoted her. I think she took your place in Flowers, but I'm not sure," he said quietly, joining her on the floor to stretch.

"I don't feel like dealing with her, she's trying to get to know me and be my sister, I don't need a sister. I have Amelia," she stated with a sigh. Derek nodded sympathetically. He loved that she and Amelia got along, and he understood why she didn't want to be friendly towards her actual sister.

"I was a bitch. I told her I could make her life a living hell if she didn't watch herself," she moaned, her hands over her face. She had meant every word, too. "I'm a terrible person."

"You aren't a terrible person, Meri, she's just a symbol of everything you could've had if your parents had stayed together. You could've had little sisters you grew up with and loved, and a father who didn't leave," he stated with a small sigh. Meredith nodded.

"She has like, this perfect life. That's not to say that I didn't have a great life growing up, but I have a hell of a lot to live up to. My mother was Prima at Paris Opera, she danced here, she danced for the Royal. I have big, enormous shoes to fill," she sighed, leaning forward and placing her upper body on the floor in a deep stretch. She had no idea how to proceed about Lexie but damn, she was stuck between a rock and a hard place.

* * *

 **I know what I did to Addison is mean, but it gave way for the rest of the story to progress! Meredith got promoted and now she's met Lexie!**


	9. Humoresque

Meredith and Derek had been together nearly five months, with Derek staying over at her house nearly every night. One Monday morning they were laying in bed in bed cuddling, when a thought popped in her head.

"You should move in with me," she said sleepily, rolling over to face him. He wasn't shocked at her words, in fact he had been expecting them for weeks. He couldn't help but smile at her, is arms hugging around her.

"I'd like that a lot," he grinned, pressing a kiss to her forehead. Her eyes lit up and suddenly she was more awake.

"Really? Cause I mean. I'm so much younger than you are and I was worried you'd wake up one morning and realize you'd made a huge mistake," she admitted, leaning in to kiss his lips. Him moving in meant waking up every morning to him, going to work with him where she would be with him all day. It was a dream come true.

"Of course I mean it. Next weekend we can pack up my stuff and I can sell the trailer since I won't need it," he promised her, hugging her ever closer. He loved the force of nature that was Meredith Grey and a small part of him saw them getting married someday. She was still young so it would be awhile yet, but they had awhile.

She smiled and rolled onto her back, eyes closed. Well, there was one thing that was going right this week. Derek was moving in with her. She knew at work tomorrow she'd have to figure out how to keep away from Lexie despite her being in serveral of her rehearsals.

* * *

Meredith walked into the studios the next day, feeling slightly refreshed from the weekend off. She headed straight for her new dressing room where she was greeted by an overexcited Amelia.

"Derek told me he's moving in with you!" she positively shrieked, throwing her arms around her. Meredith burst into laughter and shook her head. Word certainly traveled fast.

"Yes he is, we talked about it yesterday. It's happening over the weekend if you'd like to help," she smiled, tossing down her heavy dance bag and starting to change into a brand new leotard she had treated herself to when she was promoted, and a pair of tights that was filled with holes. Without looking in her mirror she quickly twisted her hair into a bun, shoving hairpins in to make everything stay and spraying hairspray all over everything. She added her usual warmups – January in Seattle was unforgiving – and slid on her ballet slippers.

"So how do you like being a principal? Have you rehearsed Swan Lake yet? It's in my rep but I haven't been called yet, maybe I will be today" she shrugged, sitting on the ground and stretching out with therabands again; there was still half an hour before she had to be in the studio for class.

* * *

Bailey was running class today; she ran them harder than Webber did. Meredith settled into her normal spot at the barre, and to her dismay Lexie took the spot in front of her. She wouldn't move though; this had been her spot for four months. Instead of acknowledging her sister, she turned around to Derek.

"Help me stretch?" She said sweetly, lifting her leg. Derek took ahold of it and lifted it over her head, Meredith bending into an overextended tilt, feeling the burn of the stretch but also settling nicely into it. Bailey came in and clapped her hands, and all dancers spun around, their left hand on the barre. During a grande battement, however, she accidentally kicked the poor girl in the head.

"Crap, I'm soooo sorry Lexie," she fake-pleaded, before whirling to the other side. Derek slightly side eyed her, but it had truly been a mistake.

Class was uneventful as usual, with Meredith breaking into a sweat early on. She stared at her sisters head for half the class, silently wishing she would go away. She was the Grey in this company, not Lexie. Lexie didn't even have Ellis as a mother; she only had Thatcher as a father. She knew she was being a brat, but this was her time to shine. Once the portable barres were put away an Meredith took her spot in the front line for center work, she let Lexie go from her mind and lost herself in the adagio, petit allegro, and grande allegro. Class was let go, but Rubies had rehearsal right away, and unfortunately Lexie would be there.

For Rubies rehearsal they started with the first part, which they had been taught yesterday. Cristina was the soloist in the dance, which Meredith was pleased with; she just knew her best friend would be getting promoted at the end of the year. The dance started with eight corps girls and one soloist, and four soloist men. Izzie, April, Lexie, Jo, Stephanie, Leah, Lucy, and Sydney were the corps girls, while Jackson, Alex, Ben, and George were the soloist men, an attempt at Webber to see what they were made of.

The dance started out with the corps and soloists on stage, dancing for a minute or two before Derek and Meredith joined them, everyone weaving in and out of each other. It was a busy dance, but Meredith loved it with it's sharp angles and unconventional choreography. By the time the first section ended and she had made her exit, she was out of breath but smiling brightly. The Balanchine steps made her feel alive and she eagerly awaited feedback, but most of it went to the corps, who were instructed to make sure they were evenly spaced out so they didn't impede on Meredith and Derek. She turned to Meredith and Derek with a smile.

"Back to making magic I see," she said, before switching the music to the Pas so she could teach them the steps. In Derek's ten years at PNB he had never dances Rubies, only Emeralds and Diamonds, so this was much more fun for him. As he turned Meredith five times and lifted her, she giggled as she was straight above his head before being placed back on her toes, turning on her shoes away from him and taking a turned out second position as he came up behind her again and lifted her from her waist. She just loved this dance; there was a lot of hopping and skipping going on and she couldn't wait until they performed it. Bailey seemed pleased with the Pas; she had them go through it twice more and then the entire group was dismissed to get ready for Swan Lake. Meredith was understudying Amelia and also had her own role of one of the little swans during the famous variation, and in general she was a swan. She was excited to understudy Amelia though, and who knew? Maybe they might do two casts.

She grabbed her water and took a gulp, sweating profusely from rehearsal. She could feel someone standing behind her and she turned around, groaning when she saw it was Lexie.

"Can I help you?" she said impatiently, drinking more water. Lexie looked uncomfortable, biting her lip.

"I feel like we got off on the wrong start the other day and I'm sorry," she started. Meredith didn't want to do this and she felt trapped.

"I'm sure you're very nice, Lexie, but I really don't want to get to know you. I didn't ask for a sister and I didn't ask for her to show up at the ballet company I've worked my ass off at to prove my worth. My mother is one of the most famous ballerinas in the world and I've learned my worth here, and it's really fantastic." She said, hands on her hips. Lexie looked wounded by her words and Meredith realized she sounded like her mother. She heaved a sigh.

"Look, Lexie, you can't just come in here and expect to have a relationship with me. You have to earn my respect, just like I had to earn everyone else's respect here, got it?" She said, as she watched Lexie nod. "Good," she said, whirling around on her pointe shoes and seeking out Amelia.

* * *

The very first thing they were taught and rehearsed for Swan Lake was the dance of the little swans. They had rehearsed it in the fall but cut the ballet from their rep, but it was for real this time. Meredith, Cristina, April and Izzie were chosen again, and since they knew it and knew each other's timing perfectly, it was a no brainer to keep them together. They rehearsed it five times before Bailey decided it was time to rehearse Odette's entrance, and Meredith stood behind Amelia as the two were taught the steps. It was more difficult than she had ever done but she loved the challenge.

Later on in the dressing room, as she was getting undressed and preparing to hop into one of the two showers that was in their private bathroom, she leaned over to Amelia.

"Mark let it slip that Addison isn't coming back. She completely snapped her achillies and she can't dance anymore," she whispered. It was the ultimate career destroyer and they both knew it, and it could have been anyone. Now Addison had to go to college just like a 'regular' person. The timeline of a dancer was short, and it was always being cut shorter by injuries.

"Damn," Amelia said, even though she had never cared for Addison. She hadn't liked how she treated Derek, or how she seemed to rule the company. She loved Meredith though, especially Meredith with Derek. She was young but she was focused, she knew what she wanted out of life, with both dance and with Derek, and Derek clearly knew what he wanted with her.

"Right? I feel bad for her, it's like her entire world changed in two seconds," she said, untying the knots on her pointe shoes and letting her feet free. They were swollen and she knew she'd have to stick them in an ice bucket tonight but that was a small price to pay for how much she danced.

* * *

After her shower she pulled her hair back in a braid as usual, throwing on a sweater and jeans with brown boots and finding Derek. She left her theater case in the dressing room and brought home with her her leotard and tights. Derek was in his dressing room with Mark, Charles, and Ben. She stood in the doorway as he got himself ready to go home and grabbed his backpack, turning around and spotting her.

"Hey you," he grinned, heading towards her and snaking an arm around her slim waist. She had her coat thrown over an arm and she smiled widely, reaching up and giving him a kiss.

"Hey." She grinned, squeezing him tightly. "How was your day?"

"Well, I got to dance with some gorgeous girl for part of it, then I had to rehearse for Gayane, which you're rehearsing with me tomorrow," he grinned. At the stage door they both pulled on their coats, and he dug out his keys as they walked through the rain to his car.

"I think I made my sister cry. And I accidentally kicked in the back of the head. I swear it was an accident!" she insisted as she climbed into the front seat. He could only laugh.

"Yes, your leg just happened to be so close to the back of her that they collided," he teased her, and she pouted a little.

"She moved! My leg was not that close, and you know I've kicked my own face before with it," she groaned, sitting back in the car and sighing as they began the drive to her house. "I'm just a horrible person. I didn't ask for a sister and I didn't ask for her to invade the perfect life I finally have," she sighed as she traced raindrops on the window. Soon they were home and she slid out of the car, unlocking the front door. She was starving so she headed into the kitchen, but of course they had no food.

"Can we order chinese?" she asked, reaching for her phone as he nodded. She speed dialed their favorite place and placed their orders, heading into the living room and collapsing on the couch.

"Basically Der, I'm going to hell," she moaned into a pillow. He laughed and rubbed her back, pulling her up so she was in his arms. "You're not going to hell, okay? She invaded your comfort zone and you weren't ready, that's all. You'll warm up to her," he promised, leaving a trail of kissed down her neck to her collarbones. "Besides, you and Amelia are the head bitches in charge, and if she does anything crazy you know my sister will handle it." That made her smile as she turned to him, grinning.

"That's because you Shepherds are perfect so far. I can't judge your other sisters yet," she teased him. She knew she'd meet them eventually, probably over the summer when most companies had a hiatus, but for now she liked having him and Amelia all to herself.

Soon their food arrived and they hungrily dove in for it. She knew if any normal person saw them now, they wouldn't believe that they were willowy, stick thin ballet dancers, but god was she starving. After dinner they climbed the stairs and hopped into the bathtub together, before falling into the bed and instantly falling asleep. Sisters could be dealt with in the morning.

* * *

 **Right now this is my favorite fic to write for, but I'm definitely not abandoning the other ones! It's just so easy to write for because ballet is my entire world; I was in a company for years and I'm currently a dance major and debating auditioning for another ballet company. I'm still on a writing binge so keep expecting constant updates! I start classes on Thursday so I may have to slow down (I have six classes) but I'll still be updating!**


	10. Valse Lente

Meredith was shocked when, later in the week, she checked the call list for that day and her name was listed for Giselle and Sleeping Beauty. Not only that but she was called for the main roles, them being Giselle and Aurora. Aurora had been on her list of dream roles and she could see that Webber was coming through with his promises. She was thrilled and, instead of heading to her dressing room to change, she headed right to Derek's, which was across the hall, and knocking on the wall. Derek looked up and could tell she was excited about something, and gestured for her to come in.

"What's got you so excited at nine in the morning?" he teased her.

"I got called to rehearse Giselle and Aurora," she said breathlessly. They were principal roles and Meredith couldn't believe her stroke of good luck as Derek pulled her into a hug.

"Congratulations! You'll be amazing I'm sure. And I'm sure Webber put me in the male role," he teased her, kissing her on the lips. "Go get ready for class so you aren't late, okay?" he smiled, and she stood up with a nod, before rushing for her dressing room.

Once she was there she dropped some things in front of her mirror, changing into her favorite black leotard with pink trim, pulling on cropped black tights. She'd done her hair at home so all she had to do was stretch out her always sore muscles before class. Laying against the wall in a full center split, she could hear Amelia getting ready behind her. Meredith's eyes were closed as she breathed deeply, trying to get in the zone and trying to figure out how to deal with her sister today.

* * *

Class was the same as usual; they'd been back almost two weeks and performances didn't start until the first week of February. Staring at the back of Lexie's head had become normal routine for her. She didn't want to hate the girl but she didn't like how she'd swooped into her life the way she did. Meredith was still on her high of being promoted and she didn't like the inconvenience of her sister bringing her down. She had to admit though, Lexie was good. She watched her every class, and for being only 15 and a corps member, she was good. It was like watching herself in the corps of the Royal before she left, where she had been accepted into the company at 15.

After center work and going across the floor, Meredith was beat. She started Sleeping Beauty rehearsals today. The rest of the cast list hadn't been up when she checked, but as she sat on the floor stretching, she found the main cast trickling in and got up to check the casting list. Callie and Mark were the king and queen, the corps boys played the courtiers. Amelia had been given Lilac Fairy, with Cristina, April, Izzie, and Lexie given Gold, Silver, Sapphire and Diamond fairies. Ben, Jackson, Alex, and Charles were the four princes, with the rest of the company filling other roles and the roles of the corps. Meredith rushed back into the studio just as rehearsal was about to begin. Bailey made a speech about all of them learning the choreo quickly and flawlessly, then nodded to Meredith.

"I know you'll learn it quickly, I don't expect much else from these fools." Meredith couldn't help but smirk. She was taught Aurora's wedding variation; parts of it were giving her trouble but she powered through them, her calves dying as usual. Bailey made her run it several times before she deemed it acceptable for today. As she slumped down against the wall, exhausted, she watched the six fairies learn their pieces from the Christening scene – the fairies were danced by soloist girls Meredith wasn't acquainted with. Lexie sat beside her, not saying a word, but Meredith could feel the tension between them and wished there wasn't any. It was a difficult position they were in and it was driving her crazy. She zeroed in on Cristina as Lilac Fairy and smiled; the role was coveted and she knew everyone was jealous she had been selected. Cristina was good though, better than the corps girls and most of the soloists.

When it became time for the gold, silver, sapphire and diamond fairies to learn their part, Meredith watched closely. Lexie was the gold fairy, and Meredith noticed she was good. Good enough to have moved up from apprentice to corps mid-year. She wasn't the daughter of Ellis Grey but she was still good. She had the body and discipline to become someone in the ballet world. Halfway through the rehearsal Meredith left, wandering down to the café for some coffee, returning ten minutes later with two cups as she stood in the doorway, watching Lexie's solo. She was so sure of herself with every step she took, with every turn, and Meredith had to smile. Begrudingly, she had to admit that she was related to the girl.

Once rehearsal was over and Lexie was taking a drink of water, Meredith approached her, holding out the cup of coffee.

"Here," she said, her voice quiet. She was trying and that was more than anyone could ask of her right now, while she was still celebrating being promoted and all the roles she was given. Lexie looked up, confused, taking the cup.

"It's just coffee, I didn't poison it or anything," Meredith said, tugging on her black cropped sweater that was keeping her warm inbetween rehearsals. "It's a peace offering," she explained, giving her a small smile. Lexie hesitantly smiled back, looking up at Meredith.

"Why are you so mean to me?" she squeaked out, Meredith not expecting that. She sighed and slid down to the floor, tucking a bit of ribbon into it's knot once again.

"Because you showed up at my job unannounced ready to be my sister. Because you can't just expect me to be okay with a sister I've never met who wants to be my best friend. And you can't expect it to happen in a place where I've fought to earn respect, where I get treated differently from everyone else because of who my mother is. If you want to be my sister and my friend, you have to earn it just like everyone else did. I came here my first day and was hated because of my mother. I earned respect by showing what I was made of. And you are to do the same with me," she said, draining her cup of coffee and tossing it in the bin, getting ready for Giselle rehearsal.

* * *

The day had been long and harrowing, and Meredith was exhausted. After rehearsal she made her way down to the PT room for a much needed full body massage. As she lay facedown on the table, she wondered if she was too harsh on Lexie, and decided she hadn't been. Lexie needed to know boundaries with her. She wasn't someone to open up to someone who tried to force their way into her life like that It didn't sit well with her. When her hour with PT was up, she made her way upstairs to change into street clothes. Derek was waiting for her in her dressing room and she sighed as he kissed her on the forehead. She quickly changed into her typical outfit of jeans and a sweater, pulling on her coat. She was just done.

The ride home was silent, with Meredith's eyes closed. He knew she was upset but didn't know how to bring it up with her. They came home and had dinner as usual – he had been moved in for a week now – and slowly climbed the stairs to the bedroom. He ran a hot bath for her, knowing that her body had been killing her lately, and soon they were tucked into bed.

"Lexie asked me why I hate her so much today," she sighed, rolling to face him. "I told her she needed to earn my respect and that came in time. I'm a bitch, I'm a horrible person," she mumbled into her hands. Derek knew that her younger sister was a sore subject for her and he understood why. "I don't even hate her it's just. I didn't ask for a sister. I don't want or need a sister besides Amelia. But now I have one and I don't know how to be a sister," she sighed.

"Be nice to her. She's new in the company. You could be her mentor. She's probably scared and nervous as hell. Try harder. Invite her over, perhaps," he suggested, kissing her forehead. Meredith simply nodded, closing her eyes and falling asleep.

* * *

A few days later Meredith was called to learn and rehearse Orpheus, which thrilled her because it was Balanchine. There were only 30 dancers in it, which comprised of only part of the company. She was Eurydice and Derek was Orpheus, the leads of the ballet. Arizona, Callie, and Arizona were Leader of the Furies, Leader of the Bacchantes, and The Dark Angel, respectively. The rest of the dancers were made up of 8 female Bacchantes, nine men as Lost Souls, and nine other women in various roles such as Furis, Pluto, Statyrs, Nature Spirits, and friends to Orpheus. It was a 30 minute ballet and there would be two other short ballets those nights; Requiem and Apollo, but Meredith loved it.

The dance itself was fun as was the Pas, and she could feel Lexie watching her and Derek. Learning the steps kept Meredith giggling as Derek picked her up, spinning her around vertically, her arms wrapped round his waist. She closed her eyes so she didn't get dizzy and as he set her down again, she landed a perfect quadruple pirouette, before moving on to the next part of the choreography.

* * *

After rehearsal, Meredith slid down the wall again to watch the corps rehearse parts of Sleeping Beauty that she wasn't in. Lexie came and sat next to her, a look of awe on her face.

"You're amazing. Like, seriously. You're one of the best dancers I've ever seen, and I've been all over the country dancing, and in Europe too," she said, looking at her sister. Meredith bit her lip and turned to her with a small smile.

"Thank you," she said to her, her first act of kindness towards the girl who was her biological sister. "I suppose I get it from my mother," she said with a shrug. Really, she didn't know, but Webber always told her she reminded him of her mother, but better. That she was a prodigy and a gift to the world of dance.

"Your mother is a legend," Lexie said, still in awe of Meredith. Meredith stood up to head back to her dressing room.

"I know. Hey, do you want to come over to our house for dinner tonight? Derek's cooking," she gave her a smile, as Lexie nodded. "Good. I'll leave my address on your mirror," she said, leaving the room to hopefully get some rest on the shabby couch they had in their dressing room.

* * *

Meredith rushed around the house later that evening, trying to make it decent looking for Lexie. The living room was somewhat clean, and as she set the dining room table, she freaked a bit over what she was wearing so she ran upstairs, slipping into a black dress and flats, running back down. Lexie was only 16 now, but there were two bottles of wine on the table anyway. She heard the doorbell ring and took a deep breath, catching sight of herself in the mirror in the hall. She was wearing regular makeup for a change and her blonde hair was down and wavy. She looked like a normal 18 year old girl. Opening the door she smiled.

"Hi Lexie, it's so nice of you to come tonight," she said, hugging the younger girl and ushering her inside. To her credit, Lexie looked nervous as Meredith pulled her into the living room.

"I know I haven't been the nicest person but I want to get to know you," she said, perched on the edge of the couch as Derek came in with two glasses of white wine. Lexie didn't question it, she took one of the glasses and sipped slowly from it. Meredith had started drinking at her age; in England and Europe it was normal. Lexie nodded and smiled slowly.

"Well, I'm sixteen. I live with my mom and dad. I started dancing when I was three, but my teacher first told me I had the opportunity to be professional when I was ten so I took it. My mom enrolled me at PNB and they placed me in the levels and I kept being sent higher and higher. She would fly all over the place for intensives…I think my favorite was with the Bolshoi." Meredith couldn't help but smile.

"My favorite was the Bolshoi too. I loved being fourteen and alone in Russia. But Vaganova was fun too, those girls seem to be made of air," she giggled, sipping from her own glass.

"Right!?" she giggled, toying with a thread on her skirt. "ABT invited me to join their school but my parents wanted me to stay home, they didn't want to move to NYC or have me move there at fifteen. I would've been an apprentice this year. So I became an apprentice at PNB and they promoted me midseason," she shrugged her shoulders. Meredith nodded.

"I was born here…my mom started at PNB. Thatcher didn't like being stuck at home all the time with me while my mom spent all her time at the theater. She danced when she was pregnant with me, until she was too big. Then six weeks after I was born she went back to dancing. They divorced when I was five and we moved to France, where she dance with the Paris Opera. Eventually she was offered a teaching position at the Royal. I started ballet at the Paris Opera but switched to the Royal, where I stayed until August. I joined PNB as a corps member in September and got promoted after Nutcracker," she said, shrugging her shoulders. It was obvious she and Lexie had two very different fathers. Luckily, Derek called that it was time for dinner from the kitchen, and the two sisters gathered themselves up and headed for the dining room. Meredith placed her glass at her spot, kissing Derek.

"It smells amazing, darling," she smiled, taking a seat.

* * *

Dinner wasn't as difficult as she had seemed it would be, and soon they were saying goodbye to Lexie.

"That was a lot less painful," she said as they were upstairs, changing into pajamas. Laying on top of the covers, she sighed. "Are all little sisters a pain in the ass?" she asked him with a giggle.

"Absolutely, especially if she's like Amelia," he laughed, grabbing her and pulling her close.

"She's definitely not like Amelia but….she's kind of like me. She doesn't give up or take no for an answer," she laughed. She was starting to like Lexie, and she didn't know if that was a good or bad thing.

* * *

 **And here's another one! She's slooooowly warming up to Lexie and the idea of having a sister, even though it's new and weird for her! She's being bratty because she's trying so hard to prove her worth outside of her mother and then BAM here comes another Grey for her to prove her worth outside of. I promise i'm going to update the other two stories!**


	11. Lollapalooza

Swan Lake was the first ballet to be performed of the season, and they spent the week leading up to Friday night learning it. Amelia was brilliant as Odette and Odile, but Meredith was bored being a swan, or villager, or whatever she was. The dance of the little swans was her highlight, but that was a dance she'd known since she was thirteen. During Danse Le Cygnus she was out of breath from jumping and leaping the entire time, but when it was over she wanted more. They'd be performing Swan Lake the rest of the season.

The next night they were performing Jewels, and Meredith was bouncing on her feet in the wings, Derek watching from the other side. She was dressed in a short red dress; the skirt hit right at her hips and flared out from there. Red jewels adorned her bodice and she had a tiara with red jewels on her head. She could hear the opening strains of Rubies right after Emeralds, she watched the corps do their opening dance, and suddenly she and Derek were dashing towards her. She loved this choreography, the way it was so unconventional, and soon she was in her element for the next half hour, weaving in and out of everyone, having her pas de deux with Derek, and then suddenly the dance, in all of it's perfection, was over. She was so glad this dance would run this entire season as well.

After the show Meredith headed to Derek's dressing room, twirling around in her short costume, giggling like crazy. She was on a high from dancing, as usual, and she just wanted more of it. As he took his stage makeup off she laid on the ground of his dressing room, pointe shoes and costume still on.

"I don't know why anyone does drugs when they could dance" she reflected. It was hard work but the endorphins she got out of dancing and exercising were crazy. She'd never felt the need to rebel and do drugs or drink heavily; ballet was her drug and she was hooked.

* * *

Saturday was a non-rehearsal day, just class and a show. They were performing Serenade again, and adding Orpheus and Raymonda variations. Meredith had been promoted to Waltz Girl in Serenade, which thrilled her, but she was also in the other two ballets as well so it was a hectic night for her. At least she had 15 minutes between ballets, and she was dancing with Derek in every single one. She knew that it was rare for a ballet master to continuously pair two people together, but she also knew that when two people had such chemistry on stage, it was good for business. Luckily the public hadn't yet found out that the two were dating.

Getting ready for Serenade was easy since she had been in it before. She was given the same costume she had worn in the fall, except now she had a different position in the dance and she loved it. Stepping onto the stage as Waltz Girl and partnering with Derek was a dream she didn't know she wanted. After Serenade came Orpheus. Her costume was just white leotard and white skirt with pink tights. It was simple and clean, leaving plenty of room to see her lines and positioning. Her hair wasn't in a bun but a long blonde braid which she knew Derek hated; it whipped him in the face whenever she turned, which made her laugh during rehearsals but on stage she was quiet. The music was dark as was the choreography, but Meredith loved it so much. It was fun, getting to play grittier roles. For Raymonda, they quickly dressed her in a stiff white tutu and tiara and she gave a little twirl in front of her mirror. She knew this was the life millions of little girls had dreamed of; she had dreamed of this growing up and she was living her dream, unhindered by anything.

Heading upstairs to Derek's dressing room, she stepped inside with a smile. He looked up at her and grinned, beckoning her to him.

"You look like a princess," he beamed, getting into his own white costume. She blushed and looked at herself in the mirror; she looked mature beyond her age. Ballet could do that to you.

"Somedays on stage I feel that way. Other days it feels like a chore. But tonight's been amazing so far," she admitted. The lead in all three ballets? It was a dream come true. With Raymonda she was dancing select variations, and a Grand Pas with him. He took her hand and led her up to the stage where they stood in the wings, waiting for intermission to be over. She took a dip in the rosin box, the sticky rocks coating her shoes so she wouldn't fall on the stage.

* * *

She was still new enough to being Derek's partner that dancing with him took her breath away. How he handled her was amazing; every touch, every lift, every turn told her that he had her and knew where to touch her in order to support her well enough so that she was successful with her lifts and such. Every review that had come out concerning their dancing had been positive, as had every review about hers. They were a match made in heaven, the Seattle Times had written, and they always want more and more of them.

Taking their final pose for Raymonda, Meredith smiled happily as the curtain closed. She drew him into a long kiss and giggled, as he held her close. The curtain opened again and they took their bows, before leaving the stage for the last time that night.

Meredith made her way to her dressing room, hoping that one of the dressers would be around to help her out of her costume, but before she got to hers she decided to peak in on Cristina. Walking it, she found Lexie in there…making out with Mark. Lexie spotted her and shoved Mark away and Meredith turned to go.

"I'm so sorry, I'll go," she said, and headed back upstairs to where the soloist and principals rooms were. After a moment she felt a hand gripping her arm and she turned; it was Lexie.

"Are you going to tell Webber or anyone?" she asked, panicked. Meredith shook her head.

"Well. He's 27 and you're 16, but it's your life, you became an adult when you signed you contract, and it's not my business to tell," she said with a shrug. "You can talk about it with me; I walked in and Derek and I almost immediately started dating. But he's going to tell Derek, they've been best friends since they were five. They met at JKO in their first ballet class and call themselves brothers. Mark's really nice though, I've done a few roles with him and he's amazing beneath the ego," she giggled, before giving her sister a hug. "If he hurts you I'll kick him in the nuts with a pointe shoe on," she threatened, before heading upstairs to her dressing room. A dresser was waiting for her and soon enough she was in leggings and an oversized sweater and uggs, her February wardrobe of choice. The rain outside was pouring down as she took off her makeup, leaving her hair in the braid.

Grabbing her purse she walked down the hall to Derek's dressing room and poked her head in; Mark was in there now and he gave her a glance. She silently signaled back that her lips were sealed, as she waited for Derek so they could go home. He eventually came out of the shower to find Meredith seated in the chair in front of his mirror, makeup free and fresh faced. She smiled brightly at him, on one of her natural dancing highs. He bent down to give her a kiss and she let her fingers roam through his hair, before he broke off to gather his things. She decided to check her email and found one from her mother.

 _Meredith dearest,_

 _I'm retiring from my position at the Royal and coming home to Seattle. Once I arrive we have many things to discuss. If possible, ask Richard for a week off as we have much to do. Remember how much I love you, and remember how extraordinarily talented you are. You must carry on the Grey name in this world of ballet._

 _Xx_

 _Mother_

Meredith stared at the email, wondering what the hell it meant. The Royal was her mother's life; she would never leave willingly. Had they forced her out? What was going on? She pushed her worried thoughts to the back of her mind as Derek said he was ready, and the two dashed through the pouring rain to the car.

* * *

 **So what do you guys think is wrong with Ellis? Sorry for leaving you hanging but I felt I needed to!**

 **Also if there's anything you'd like to see happen in the fic, let me know!**

 **Read and review please xx**


	12. Once Upon a Dream

Meredith had managed to get a week off from classes, rehearsals, and shows, but she stood at baggage claim at SEA-TAC, worrying crazily. Her mothers flight had landed and now she was looking for the familiar strawberry blonde woman. After what seemed like forever she saw her and ran over to her.

"Mom!" she said, throwing her arms around her tightly. To her credit, Ellis hugged her equally as tight. If Meredith knew what was going on, she would've cried, but she didn't know how worried she should've been.

"Meredith, it's so good to see you," she said, examining her daughter. She looked great, she looked just like she had when she was a young dancer at PNB.

"How are you mom? What's going on?" she asked her, pulling her moms familiar suitcase off the carousel, and heading out to her car. Ellis stayed by her side and got in the passenger seat as Meredith started to drive towards the house.

"It's complicated, I don't think we should talk about it until we get home," Ellis said. She sounded distant and distracted. Meredith immediately started to worry, but they were home in no time and walking through the front door. Ellis looked around with a smile.

"I like what you've done with the place," she said, taking a seat on the couch and patting the spot beside her. Meredith hung up their coats and smiled a bit.

"Thank you…Derek and I decided to decorate together. He's a principal. Derek Shepherd," she said with a shrug as she sat down.

"Ah, I've met him. Immensely talented. Richard said you two are the darlings of the company, the media loves you," she said with a smile, looking at her daughter with tears in her eyes. It was only March; Meredith wouldn't be 19 until July. She didn't deserve this.

"Meredith…I have Alzheimers," she said, tears rolling down her cheeks. "It started by me forgetting simple things, like where my glasses were when they were on my face. The names to simple ballet positions. So I had myself tested and decided to move back to Seattle so we could have time together before it was too late."

Meredith felt her life spinning out of control in five seconds. She grew increasingly upset, hyperventhilating a bit and then reaching out to cling to her mom.

"No, no mom, this isn't happening, I need more time with you, I'm only 18," she cried. All those times growing up where she said she'd hated her mother, all those times over the past six months she'd resented her, she wished she hadn't. That time Ellis had showed up at PNB and she'd yelled at her…she'd give anything to take it away.

Ellis clung tightly to her crying daughter.

"Shhh Meri. There are amazing doctors here who are doing amazing things, we'll just have to see what happens, okay? I got a nice apartment close to the hospital and I have you here. It's going to be okay."

"But I can't lose you mom. As much as I pretend you aren't, you're everything to me. You inspired me my whole life, you're why I'm a professional dancer, and you're my mom," she sobbed. Ellis just rocked her back and forth.

"I asked Richard if I could teach classes at PNB for the company and he said yes, as long as my mind is clear. So you have me. You know I can't favor you, but I also know you don't need any favoring. You're a soloist and proving your own worth." Meredith was still crying but she nodded.

"There's just one thing. Thatcher's daughter is in the corps," Meredith sighed. "It's nice to be getting to know a sister but it's also painful." Ellis nodded slightly.

"Well I'm not going to treat her any differently than I would any other company member because she's just another company member," she decided.

BREAK

Meredith spent the rest of the week helping her mother get her affairs in other. She signed her power of attorney over to Meredith, which frightened her to her core. She was eighteen; how was she supposed to make important medical conditions? Meredith was also given everything she owned in her will, including her sizeable inheritance, and was told she had access to her trust fund now. It was all so dizzying and Meredith wanted her life to go back to what it was.

Derek was the only person she had told because she needed a support system. He had let her cry in his arms at night over her mother as she fell asleep, rubbing her back gently. She was 18, she was still a teenager, and now she was dealing with this and it wasn't fair.

BREAK

Tuesday morning Meredith walked into the studio and her mother was there, teaching class. It had been almost a year since she'd taken a class from her mother but it was predictable and she knew it inside and out. Derek gave her a kiss before she poked Lexie

"That's my mother, play it cool," she whispered, before she placed her feet in first position and began her plies.

During center work she knew she impressed her mother with how much she had improved when her extension went right over her head. Ellis watched how her daughter stood out in sea of company members.

At rehearsal she wanted to see Rubies; it was in the lineup of ballets for tonight again, an she and Derek were more than happy to oblige. Once the thirty minute ballet was finished, Ellis clapped for the group.

"That was perfection, everyone, especially you," she said, nodding to Lexie, who jumped a bit and looked towards Lexie. "You're Lexie Grey, aren't you?" she said slyly. Meredth looked back at her little sister in a panic but it was like an alien had take over Ells. "You're good, you're going to go far," she said, before turning back to Meredith and Derek. "You two look like a dream, partnering together. Keep it up, I'll be watching from the house tonight," she said fondly.

Meredith was in shock at how nice her mother was being but she wasn't going to take it for granted. Running out of the studio, she caught up with Ellis.

"Mom!" she called out, catching up to her and linking arms with her. "It's nice having you as a ballet mistress again," she smiled warmly. Ellis smiled back and looked at her daughter

"It's nice being back. I don't know how long I'll be here for, it's nice," she smiled, giving Meredith a huge. Meredith hugged her back tightly with a smile, before she had to get back to Orpheus rehearsa.

"Oh and by the way, Meri? I wore the same Rubies costume," she said with a smile that made Meredith's heart swell with pride and joy.

BREAK

Tonight they were dancing Jewels and Giselle; Meredith was the lead in Rubies and Giselle in Giselle so it was a busy night for her. She was proud that her mother was in the audience though and she dedicated her performances to her, all too happy to make mommy proud. She danced like she had never danced before, every movement careful and precise, crisp and perfect. She let herself become vulnerable in the romantic pas scenes, and both ballets ended on a great note.

Her mother rushed backstage to tell her how amazing and extraordinary she was, and she was already getting interviewed by severel reporters, Derek at her side. She finally got rid of them and focused on her mother.

"You truly think so? I thought I was crap," she laughed and shook her head.

"Meri all dancers think but you shine so bright up there, no one else has a chance. You're definitely my daughter," she smiled, pulling her close and handing her a box from Tiffanys. Inside was a pair of earrings appropriate enough to wear on stage and she gasped, throwing her arms around her.

"Mom you shouldn't have! They're gorgeous thank you," she smiled closing the box ad tucking it into her dance bag.

BREAK

Coming home with Derek, she was all smiles for the first time this week. It was 11PM but he cooked up some steaks and vegetables, setting a glass of wine in front of her. She definitely deserved it.

"I made my mom proud today," she said with a small smile as she took a bite of steak over candlelight. "She told me I looked beautiful and I'm going to be just like her. She's proud of me for doing so much at 18, and I think she likes you too," she grinned, knowing how much it too for her mom to like any guy she had ever dated or had a deep partnership with, but Ellis had told her she had a good feeling about Derek.

"She's softer than she was when I did the Royal's intensive. Her class is just as difficult but she seems nicer and more forgiving," he said, continuing to eat. Meredith nodded.

"I think…it's the Alzheimers. She wants to make the most of the lucid time she has less and she wants to be a better person. I'm glad she's here in Seattle so she gets to see me and watch us dance," she smiled coyly over her glass of wine. Meredith had already decided that Derek was it. It. The one. Forever. The rest of her life. She was just too young to get married. Maybe when she was 21. Derek would be thirty then, but to them, age wasn't an issue. It was just a matter of her being old enough to want to get married, even though she wanted to now. She simply didn't want to be a teenage bride, really.

BREAK

Class with her mother was difficult, as it always was, but it made her feel alive inside. As the men spun around doing tours, Meredith chatted to Lexie against the back barre, giving her advice about the company and her mother. The girls were called to the center to do fouette turns, which was always an amusing competition. Meredith was always able to execute 32 flawless fouette turns, throwing in doubles and triples in there. She and Amelia were the best and they kept giggling as they tried to outdo each other. Derek filmed it on his phone to post on the PNB youtube channel and Instagram, and the girls finally ended it in an extended post, smiling and dripping with sweat. The two girls knew everyone in the company envied them; they were cast in the best roles and called to rehearse the best as well, but it was professional jealousy. They were good and they knew it.

As everyone was leaving the studio, Meredith caught Lexies arm and pulled her over to Ellis. Lexie tried to pull back from her but Meredith insisted.

"Mom, this is my sister Lexie," she said with a smile. Ellis looked up from the rehearsal notes she was studying and smiled slightly, holding out her hand.

"Hello, Lexie, it's nice to meet you. Meredith's told me so much about you," she admitted, and Lexie blushed deeply. "You look just like your father," Ellis said with a smile. "I promise I'm not scary and I promise I have no ill will towards you, or Thatcher," she promised, making a note on part of the choreography.

"You're very talented like your sister, maybe Thatcher has some talent in him too," she laughed, and Lexie broke a smile.

"I'm just such a huge fan, I grew up idolizing your work knowing my dad was married to you and just wow, you're my ballet mistress now," she laughed nervously. Meredith giggled.

"She's not going to bite you I promise," she teased, nudging her in the arm. "Come on, Lex, we've got Sleeping Beauty rehearsals next door," she smiled, waving goodbye and pulling Lexie into the studio next door

BREAK

They were starting with the first scene; the only choreography that had been learned was the wedding variation and then Sleeping Beauty had been pushed aside for the winter ballets, but this was for the upcoming spring season in March. Meredith wasn't up yet so she watched the fairy's and their partners dancing, along with the corps girls. Lexie was stuck in the corps along several apprentices they were giving the chance to preform with them, to see who might be offered a contract.

Meredith watched with glee; this was one of her favorite ballets and Webber had given it to her mother to choreograph and stage. She watched her friends as the four Jeweled fairies, warming up her feet with therabands and breaking in a new pair of pointe shoes. She was still going through them like crazy. She watched Lexie rehearse the Gold fairy and smiled. She was spritely and young, nailing all the steps with grace, posing as she finished her short solo and running off to wait for her re-entrance. The Christening scene was a long one and Meredith wasn't called to dance for awhile yet. Right now, the men were doing their thing, surrounded by members of the court and the fairies.

The second scene started with the Garland Dance, something Meredith could dance in her sleep but she was enchanted as she watched her friends and sister dancing it with the long, annoying garlands of flowers.

Meredith finally made her entrance doing Aurora's 16th Birthday variation, flirting with the courtiers and generally having a good time. Ellis watched proudly as Meredith flawlessly did the turns and developpe's as Aurora took the roses from her suitors, and Meredith came to the finale of the variation. There was only one dance before she had her next variation. God, she needed to go to the gym to keep up with this ballet. Pretending to prick her finger on the spindle and falling in her eternal sleep was fun, especially as she ran and leapt across the stage in a frenzy before falling asleep in her mothers arms, played by Erika.

They went straight through to the second act, which involved Derek as the Prince and Cristina as the Lilac Fairy, as long as the corps. The Prince found Aurora and woke her from her 100 years of sleep, thus awakening the rest of the court as well. In the actual show, Meredith had to change, but in this rehearsal they powered through. The entire court came out before Meredith and Derek did, including all of the fairies, before they appeared at the back, dressed in costumes of white and gold, looking like royalty. Everyone in the room watched the entertainment while awaiting Meredith and Derek to dance.

Finally it was their Pas and she walked out with him on the balls of her feet, her white practice tutu bouncing as she smiled. Their Pas brought claps from their peers, then there was the Tarantella which Derek danced himself. Meredith came back to dance Aurora's wedding variation, with the coda following that. Meredith was out of breath and she had shin splints, but she loved this. After their pieces, the entire court did a final dance, as did Meredith and Derek, before the ballet ended, everyone in final pose. Ellis let them all sweat for a moment before she smiled.

"It looks good, we'll be rehearsing every day before it opens. We're rehearsing Serenade and Orpheus next, so get ready." Meredith simply slid down the wall in exhaustion.

As they left the room for a short break, Derek caught up to Meredith with a teasing grin.

"I want our wedding to be just like that," he laughed. Instead of the 18 year old being alarm, she shot right back.

"Oh, with me eventually in a white and gold tutu and tiara? 'Cause I'd just call that a regular Tuesday night to me," she smirked, locking him in a kiss. He was shocked how nothing rattled her not even something like marriage at her young age.

BREAK

 **Sorry it took me so long to update! I started back at school (including my dance major!) and I was busy making sure I did everything I could for my classes. Here's a new chapter and I hope you like it! I need to stray away from the technical aspect and focus more on the romance aspect, I know, but I find it fun to do the rehearsal and show thing! It's fun for me**


	13. Valse De Heures

The rest of the season passed in a blur of class, rehearsals, and performances. Meredith and Derek continued to shine on stage, and Meredith had continued to have been called for famous soloist and principal roles. After their final performance of Swan Lake though, everyone hugged one another while still on stage. They wouldn't be seeing each other until September. Meredith spent her time in her dressing room, taking off her costume and makeup, hopping in the shower and showering the sweat off. As she threw on a dress and sandals as most of them were going out after the show, Cristina ran into the room screaming. Meredith looked up from the natural makeup she was applying and turned.

"Mere! I got promoted to soloist!" she screamed, and the two girls threw themselves at each other and yelled.

"Oh my god! I knew you would Cris! Now we can both have crazy amazing roles next year! Who else did?" she asked reaching back and French braiding her wet hair.

"Jackson, Alex, April, and Izzie. I know they're holding auditions in a few days and might hire people, and from the apprentices they hired Jo, Stephanie, Leah, Heather. There's going to be new apprentices and well, new people from the auditions too. But how exciting is this!" she yelled, and Meredith laughed.

"Come out to dinner with all of us, I just have to get Derek," she smiled, grabbing her purse and dance bag, and rolling her theater case out. All of the things that were usually thrown around the room were finally packed away, as none of them would be there for the summer. She and Cristina made it to Derek's dressing room, where he was buttoning up his shirt.

"Cristina got promoted," she grinned, as he finally followed them out and down to the car. Meredith had driven in that day.

"Congratulations," he grinned, giving the tiny Cristina a hug, and they were off to the restaurant.

They were there until 2AM, at which they ended up at home, sleeping late and staying in bed all day.

* * *

It was only a week or two later when Meredith found herself sitting on a plane to New York. Derek had reasoned that he knew her mother; she should meet his family. She wore a loose boho dress over a tight slip, figuring it was family friendly, with sandals on her feet. Once they landed at JFK she was overwhelmed by how hot it was compared to Seattle. They navigated the airport fairly quickly, grabbed their rental car, and soon were in Westchester. She had been too tired that morning to do her hair, but she did a quick crown braid that she normally favored, and soon they were pulling into the Shepherds driveway.

The house was large and white, on acres of land and Meredith smiled. It was beautiful and she loved it at first sight. As she climbed out of the car, three girls came out of the house to greet them; Meredith didn't know which was which but she knew they were Nancy, Lizzie, and Kathleen. They all looked just like Derek and Amelia. Meredith felt intimidated and hung back as Derek greeted his sisters, standing by the car. Suddenly one of them came up to her, all smiles.

"You must be Meredith, your mother talked about you all the time in the company and I remember you as an apprentice. You're an amazing dancer," she said, reaching out to hug her." This must be Kathleen; she danced with the Royal. She had received a scholarship to train there through YAGP one year and had entered the company.

"Did she? Up until this year I thought I was the bane of her existence," she giggled, deciding she liked Kathleen. Next came Lizzie, a short, pretty girl with long dark curls, who looked like Amelia.

"I'm Lizzie, I dance for ABT, which is totally overrated but Misty Copeland is kind of cool," she shrugged. "Derek said you guys want to take class there this summer," she said as Meredith nodded. "We all do when we're home since we all trained there so this could be fun," she smiled.

Nancy was the oldest but she smiled and hugged her just the same. "Welcome to the family! I dance at San Fran, I'm a Principal, but I'm a lot older than these goons, Derek is second to youngest. Where's Amelia?" she asked them and Meredith shrugged.

"Something about getting a new apartment now that she's principal then she'll be here, who knows." She shrugged again. She girls ushered Meredith inside, Derek following behind, chatting to her about her career and Ellis Grey.

"Well, I'm a soloist with PNB, I sort of got thrown on in Sugar Plus when Addison tore her Achilles. She can't dance anymore. From day one though Webber gave me soloist and principal roles. I thought it was favoritism but he sat me down and told me how much potential he saw in me and he felt I deserved the roles. My first big role was Juliet with yours truly as Romeo and the reviews were insane, and I think that showed Webber what I was made of." She took a deep breath to come up for air. "I lived in Paris for a few years because my mom was prima of the Paris Opera, then we moved to England and I started training at the Royal Ballet School. My mother was still dancing then but pushing it in her 40''s. They made her one of the ballet mistresses with Webber was one of my masters, and I loved it. I was scouted by a few companies after several years at YAGP and Prix De Lausanne, but I chose PNB because I grew up in Seattle and it was far from my mom. Plus Webber was there and PNB is amazing," she finished up, finding herself on a couch. The girls stared at her in disbelief. She was ballet royalty and as brought up in dance just right. She was lucky and she knew she was lucky.

"So you're an 18 year old soloist?" Nancy asked, and Meredith nodded. Nancy was in awe of the girl and couldn't wait to take a class with her tomorrow morning. Lizzie chimed in.

"We're sorry mom isn't here, she's a nurse at the VA hospital but she's home for dinner every night and she's going to make dinner herself tonight, she's excited to meet you!" Meredith smiled warmly at that; her mother had never been one to make dinner; she preferred take out as she poured over her rehearsal notes, especially when they had lived in London.

For awhile the girls got to know each other, trading horror stories about the world of dance that kept Meredith laughing for hours. Soon Amelia came in the door, her hair pulled back and wearing a pair of jean shorts and a tank top, a cardigan slung over her arm, dragging a suitcase behind her with a smile.

"I see you've met my favorite person ever," she preened, hugging Meredith tightly and plopping down in an armchair. Meredith grinned, grateful to see a familiar face. The girls talked for a few more hours before Mrs. Shepherd came in the door and took in the scene before her. Six dancers in her living room, come home for their summer hiatus. She spotted Meredith immediately; she was petite and blonde, looking slightly nervous.

"Meredith! It's so nice to finally meet you. Kathleen has told me stories from when you were little and when you were an apprentice, and a lot of stories about your mother." Meredith smiled and stood up; Carolyn noted that she couldn't be more than 5'4' and 100 pounds soaking wet. She was a classic ballerina and now she could picture her even more dancing with her. Carolyn pulled her into a hug and she hugged her back, feeling at home here in his housel

* * *

The next day all six of them went into the city to ABT studios; it was just the beginning of June so summer intensives hadn't started yet. There were open classes in the morning and Meredith had remembered loving ABT classes. Barre was easy and then they all put on their pointe shoes; she was sandwiched between Amelia and Lizzie. All of Derek's sisters were either soloists or principals so she felt like she could keep up. The teacher put on music for stretching and, after stretching a bit she got up, wanting to work on her turns. Lizzie stood beside her and grinned. "Want to have a fouette contest?" Meredith laughed and nodded; they were one of her strengths and Lizzie had no idea what she just signed up for.

"Naturally," she smiled, innocently getting into her preparation. Lizzie said 'go' and suddenly she was turning as fast as she could, throwing doubles and triples in there. She was far past 32 by now, and a crowd had gathered around he girls. Lizzie fell out of her turns, and Meredith stopped around 64 and posed confidently, smirking, as Derek clapped Lizzie on the back.

"Never challenge Meredith to turns. She might look like nothing but she's everything," he grinned, hugging his slightly wounded sister.

She was good. No, she was more than good. She was fantastic, Lizzie thought, as she watched her dance the adagio with her first group. It was in her genes to be extraordinary and to never give up when she wanted to. She was good for her brother despite being only 18, and she was a damn good dancer. She could tell just by watching her dance that she was going to go far an become someone famous. She'd seen videos of her and Derek dancing and the chemistry they had on stage mirrored the chemistry they had off stage. She definitely approved of this tiny force of nature for her brother, and considered her her sister after that day.

* * *

After class, the six of them were starving so they headed downtown a bit to Max Brenner, maker of all things chocolate. Meredith had been there before and ordered a chocolate shake with ganache on top, and mac and cheese. They hung out long past food and dessert, in the form of chocolate fondue, had been consumed, joking and laughing about anything and everything. Mishaps on stage, falling in the studio, dead pointe shoes, partners almost dropping them (Meredith thought of George and how she was rid of him now), growing up in the world of dance. Meredith loved it to pieces and clung to every moment. She felt like she was finally home, and the best part was she wasn't competing with anyone at the table, especially since Derek was a guy and they were cast together. She felt warm and happy as she sipped on a diet coke, all of them discussing the roles they'd dance in their years in their companies.

* * *

 **Here's another chapter for you guys! I think next chapter will be Meredith's birthday** **Hope you like this!**


	14. Entree Du Prince

Meredith's birthday was Bastille Day, so it only made sense for her and Derek to spend it in Paris. Leaving from JFK, Derek promised to bring her back in one piece so his sisters could celebrate a belated birthday with her.

Meredith had only lived in Paris a few years, but had retained almost everything she knew of the French language. Stepping off the plane at Charles de Gaulle airport, it almost felt like coming home to her, to be in the middle of people speaking rapid French. She led Derek to the baggage area, where they grabbed their suitcases and headed outside for a cab. The air was steamy as Meredith hailed a cab, the pair piling in as the driver handled their bags.

"Hotel Saint James, sil vous plait," Meredith said, her French accent perfect still after eleven years. They enjoyed the drive to the hotel, pointing out famous sites or places they wanted to end up at during their stay. They had two weeks in Paris and a week in London, where Meredith wanted to pop in at the Royal. She was tired, but the day was just beginning in Paris. Soon the taxi pulled up at the front doors of the hotel and a bellhop assisted them with their bags, guiding them other to check in. Soon they were in the elevator up to their room, and Meredith didn't feel as exhausted.

They were guided to their room by the bellhop and given a key, their bags placed in the room. Derek tipped the man and Meredith stepped inside with a smile. She swept through the room with a smile. It was huge, with a living room and separate bedroom with a bed that was swathed in white curtains. A huge bathroom connected to the bedroom, and there was one in the main room as well. French doors led to a balcony and Meredith pushed them open, stepping onto a beautiful balcony and smiling. They had a perfect view of the Eiffel Tower and she couldn't be happier. Derek explored their suite, smiling before coming out onto the balcony with her.

"Isn't it beautiful? Imagine being five and moving here from Seattle," she breathed, looking in all directions. Some things she could remember from her childhood and many trips here with her ballet school friends, others were new or she couldn't recall.

"We lived five minutes from the studio and theater, it's like PNB with the studios at street level and the theater up more. I spent hours there, It was the first place I danced," she smiled, as he drew her closer to him. She smelled like lavender and some other flower he couldn't identify, probably something in her perfume. He turned her face gently, easing her into a kiss that brought a huge smile to her face. He pulled back and she pouted a bit, giggling

"More," she demanded teasingly, her mouth crashing against his, knowing how clichéd they were, kissing on a balcony in Paris with the Eiffel Tower in the background but she didn't care, it was perfect to her.

She was the one who came up for air this time, with stars in her eyes, her hair blowing in the slight breeze that relieved some of the heat of summer.

"What did you want to do first? I know the best place to get crepes, but I'm also exhausted," she said, knowing the time change was going to be hard.

"Nap," he laughed, picking her up by her legs like he did in so many ballets and carried her to the bed. He told her not to move, then brought their many bags into the bedroom, pulling out a tank top and shorts for her. She quickly changed and slipped under the covers, snuggling up to him once he joined her. She quickly fell asleep out of pure exhaustion after setting an alarm for later.

* * *

Upon waking up, the sun was setting, but Meredith felt refreshed. She climbed out of the huge, amazingly comfortable bed and headed into the main room. There was an ice bucket with champagne, the ice new, so she figured concierge had been in while they had been asleep. Peeking out the window she watched the sun set behind the Eiffel Tower, knowing she would be dragging Derek up there. She had a million and one places to take him in the two weeks they were there and Meredith wanted to get started.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and she turned to smile up at Derek.

"What to go out? We can eat at the creperie and if you're good we'll go to the actual Moulin Rouge," she giggled. "No shows are on tonight, but it's cool to see everything," she smiled. She was still tired but it was their first night here, she wanted to make it worthwhile.

"Then why don't we get dressed and have dinner, and you'll take me out," he grinned, as she turned and skipped to the bedroom. She slipped into a silky sky blue dress that was backless, twisting her hair up into something elegant, and sliding her feet into a pair of heels, which were definitely more daunting to her than pointe shoes. She found it funny that she could dance for six hours in pointe shoes but high heels freaked her out.

Once they were both changed, Derek grabbed one of the room keys and they were off. The creperie was a few streets over and Meredith had fun pointing out things she remembered from being a kid here. She'd been with a nanny of course, but she saw so much of Paris because of it.

* * *

After dinner at the creperie and a visit to the Moulin Rouge, Meredith dragged him to her favorite place in the entire country of France.

"This is the Opera National de Paris," she grinned, her arms wide as they looked at the theatre. Derek grabbed her at the waist and held her into an elegant fishdive and she giggled and she was returned to her feet.

"It's crazy, this is where I started dancing seriously," she smiled as she was filled with nostalgia. She had taken classes at a smaller studio, and when she was 8 her mother had sent her to Paris to learn from 'the best'. Everything was 'the best' to her mother, though, and Meredith had returned to the Royal by the time she was thirteen. The Paris Opera Ballet School was notoriously difficult to be accepted into. There was a training period for young students from ages 8-11, and then there was an entrance exam just to get into the school. It also went by height and weight. Meredith found it barbaric now, weighing little kids like that, but at the time it was second nature to her.

Derek let her reminisce a bit longer, before snaking his arm around her waist.

"And we've been allowed to take class with the company tomorrow," he smiled, and she looked up, surprised yet pleased. It was a present she didn't know she wanted, to take class at the first big school she'd ever attended.

"You're perfect and dead set on making this my best birthday ever," she laughed, jumping into his arms as they spun around in front of the theater, her lips locking with his. Soon after they began the walk back to the hotel, feeling drained but both of them happy with how the day had turned out.

* * *

The next morning came too soon, and Meredith was rummaging around in her suitcase for tights and a leotard, hairpins in her mouth as she stuck them into her bun.

"Found them!" she called out, to no one really as Derek was in the other room, already dressed for class. She shoved a few more pins into her bun and pulled on her tights and leotard, grabbing her pointe shoes and shoving them into a bag. She was a bit of a mess but tried to fix herself up by adding makeup, rolling up her convertible tights, and slipping into a pair of leather flip flops with a black sundress overtop of everything. She came out of the bedroom, feeling frazzled, knowing that coming back to her first ballet school she should look like the professional she was.

Derek looked at her and smiled; she claimed she looked a wreck but she looked put together with the diamond earrings from her mother on her ears, a perfect bun at the back with French braids at the sides, a neat dress on, and she'd managed to find a bag. She smiled bag, tucking back imaginary hairs.

"Of course we have to dance on our vacation," she teased him as they made their way downstairs in the elevators, and he laughed at her.

"Hey you have every intention of dancing at the Royal when we visit!"

"That's different, I grew up there, that's my home, I have a house to go to there," she said with a shrug as they stepped into the morning air. It wasn't sweltering yet but it wasn't chilly, and she loved it. It was only a ten minute walk to the studios and when they arrived, they received odd looks as Meredith explained who they were in French. Finally she arrived at Benjamin's door and knocked a bit, before she was allowed in.

"Hello, er, I'm Meredith Grey, my mother is Ellis Grey, she was one of the Etoiles..forever and a day ago." When she mentioned her mothers name he started to speak rapid French and got very excited. Meredith was so thankful for her years in Paris, since she was able to communicate with him. She and Derek were led to dressing rooms, and Meredith sat on the floor, tying the ribbons on her pointe shoes.

* * *

Class was great; the French style was slightly different from what they were used to but Benjamin couldn't stop talking about Ellis and how much Meredith resembled her mother. After class, the pair went back to their hotel to shower and change; Meredith used a bobby pin to hold back some hair and dressed in a white silk sundress trimmed in blue lace, pairing it with brown leather flip flops.

"Today we're doing something touristy, but my ten year old self found fascinating" she laughed, tossing her phone and passport in her bag as he finished getting dressed. Once he had on a buttondown and slacks, they left the room holding hands.

After walking at least an hour, they ended up on the Champs-Elysees. Meredith couldn't help but smile; it was one of her favorite places in the city. The shopping was fantastic and as a ballet student, they always used the long avenue for saut de chats. Derek wasn't daunted as they headed towards the Arc di Triomphe, loving every moment of this.

"So how much of the city don't you know?" he asked with a laugh, and Meredith shook her head.

"You give a twelve year old free reign over her life while her mother is in England and she'll comb the entire city for the best parts," she smiled, just as they reached the famous monument. They could climb up if they wanted to, but Meredith wasn't here for that; the view simply showed traffic in her eyes. She and Derek stood staring up, before she headed over to a woman, asking her to take a photo of them and get the monument in as well. She went back over to Derek and giggled, and he caught her in a fish dive again, the pair all smiles before she was set back on her feet and her phone was returned to her hands.

"Merci beaucoup," Meredith thanked the women, before kissing Derek.

"And we have ballet tickets tonight. Because you have to see the Paris Opera Ballet once in your life," she smiled, twirling around in the sunlight. "Funny story, they're performing Romeo and Juliet," she smiled, returning to him and placing her lips against his again. "You'll always be my Romeo," she smiled.

* * *

After their long walk back from the Champs-Elysees, they ended up taking a nap again, still not used to the huge time change. Upon waking up though, Meredith started to get ready to see the ballet. In Paris it was different; everyone dressed up and she loved it to pieces. She wished it were still like that in America.

Her dress was black with embroidered silver flowers, squared off at the neck and ending at her knees in a bundle of tulle. Her hair was twisted expertly into a French twist, with pearls around her neck and left wrist, and at her ears. On her feet were a pretty pair of Jimmy Choos, and she'd expertly done her makeup, after years of doing stage makeup. Derek was getting ready in the bedroom and when she came out of the bathroom, he felt like he was seeing her for the first time. She looked older than her 18 years; she looked like an 18 year old Ellis, dressed up and elegant for her first gala. Meredith looked up from adjusting her dress and smiled, her eyes sparkling.

"Do I look okay?" she smiled, twirling on the spot, and a lump appeared in his throat. Good god, he loved her so much. He would marry her tomorrow if she wasn't so young, but he knew that was what he wanted.

"You look breathtaking," he told her, as he knotted his tie and put on his shoes. She dug out a black clutch and tucked her ID, phone, and lipstick into it, before deciding she was ready.

"Come here, I don't think I've ever seen us this put together," she laughed, standing in front of the full length mirror. He moved behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist as she snapped a full length shot of the two of them. She texted it to two people: her mother and Cristina. To her mother she said 'loving Paris, missed it so much!'. To Cristina she texted 'Can you believe how nice we look? Cant wait to get back to PNB ha ha ha'. They left the room and once downstairs, were whisked to the Palais Garnier for Romeo and Juliet.

* * *

The ballet was beautiful and amazing as usual, but Meredith couldn't wait to get back to the hotel. She kicked off her shoes and removed her jewelry before falling back onto the unmade bed. She could hear Derek taking off his shoes and his watch o the bed beside her, before he curled up to her, trailing kisses down her back. She couldn't help but let out small moans; he knew just where to touch her and get a reaction. She felt the zipper on her dress sliding down and she helped him, before rolling over and unbuttoning his shirt. Kicking her expensive dress to the floor, the pair were gone long before it hit midnight on July 14th, and the first fireworks went off for Bastille Day and Meredith's 19th birthday.

* * *

 **Ahhh! So glad I finally got to write this! My life is so crazy but again, I will always update my stories! I'm a dance major and dance 20+ hours a week between classes and rehearsals plus I get up at 645 every day and drive like an hour to school gah! I love my major and what I plan to do with it (dance therapy for eating disorders) but it can be so crazy! I wouldn't change it for anything though**

 **Anyway, I was wondering! Should Derek propose for Meredith's birthday? Should he give her a promise ring? Or should it just be jewelry? You guys vote in the reviews!**


	15. Gayne Suite No 2: Choosing the Bride

Meredith woke up early on her birthday, wanting to make the most of the day. She rolled over, snuggling up to Derek until he woke up, smiling at her.

"Good morning, birthday girl," he said with a smile, playing with her hair a bit, the two of them still naked from the night before.

"Mm good morning," she grinned, leaning in and giving him a kiss. First they took a shower together, with a repeat of the night before, Meredith stepped out of the shower feeling refreshed. She let her hair dry naturally, letting her natural waves flow down her back, slipping into a white slip that clung to her, throwing a much looser lavender dress with tiny polka dots on. Her theme was purple today, apparently.

Breezing through their spacious suite, she carefully did a small crown braid, letting the rest of her hair fly free as she burst out onto the balcony, smiling widely.

"Bonjour Paris! C'est mon anniversaire!" she called out to anyone would be listening at 9 AM. Turning 19 was certainly exciting for her and she couldn't wait to start their day of fun in the city. It was all planned out by her, things she wanted to do and see, but Derek had insisted on taking care of dinner. He'd even gone out of his way to buy her a dress and new shoes, but was keeping them locked up in the closet and only he had a key.

Once the pair were out of the hotel, Meredith smiled a bit.

"Today we're going out of the city and visiting Champagne and do a vineyard tour and such," she smiled as Derek got dressed in the next room. They had to take a train to get there but she didn't care, it would be fun and they could take advantage of the lower drinking age, especially on her birthday.

* * *

The train ride to Champagne was only an hour long, and from the train station it wasn't a long walk to the vineyard. Meredith was pleased with how she'd planned her birthday. They'd had breakfast at a café close to their hotel, before catching the train. Walking into the vineyard itself was perfect; on both sides they were surrounded by grape vines and flowers as they entered the main building of the vineyard. They were at Champagne Charlier and Meredith was surprised to see so much sunshine and so many flowers blooming after living in Seattle that she smiled. They headed out back for a tour of the vineyard, their hands entwined, and Meredith knew she'd never been happier in her entire life.

After the tour they sat at a small table together with several glasses of wine and champagne, and some fresh French cheeses. The pair were giggly from the alcohol and kept kissing each other. She couldn't help it; she loved him so much and it was her 19th birthday. Eventually they were whisked away on a tour of the cellars, which Meredith found interesting to see all the different wines and champagnes they had. Derek couldn't resist buying a few to bring home with him, and made a bottle of his own champagne, with help of course, but he didn't name it. Soon it was around 2 PM, and they were running to catch the train back to Paris.

* * *

Getting ready for dinner was hard. Meredith took a shower, then took her time getting ready, glad the suite had two bathrooms. Once she had dried her long hair, she took all of it and sort of rolled it at the nape of her neck, securing it with bobby pins, which went everywhere with her. She studied her hair from four angles, fixing it and redoing it several times before it was finished. Next was her makeup, smokey eyes and red lipstick, before she came out of the room. There was a box with a bow sitting on the bed and she opened it to find one of the most gorgeous gowns she (now) owned. The dress was ice blue and strapless, cascading to the floor in waves of chiffon. She put on her diamond earrings from her mother, slipping her feet into silver slip-on Manolo's. Derek came back into the room and watched her gather her things for her clutch; she was the most beautiful person he had ever seen.

"Are you ready?" he asked, touching her back lightly with a smile. Meredith dropped her phone into her clutch and stood up straight, adjusting herself.

"I think so," she smiled, not knowing where he was taking her but she was in a floor length gown and expensive shoe's that she'd bought at the expense of her mother. It was her 19th birthday and she was ready to celebrate like an adult. Being in the world of dance her entire life had matured her in ways other people her age weren't; she performed and attended galas held by sponsers to PNB with her boyfriend, while other people her age went to college and did keg stands. It was completely different and she couldn't imagine her life any other way.

Heading downstairs, they waited a few minutes for the car service and once it came around, Derek helped Meredith in. She looked up at him with a smile as she slid over and he climbed in with her. The car started moving and they were whisked off into the evening.

"So here's part one of your present," he said, holding out a Tiffany's box for her to open. She'd had a lot of them lately, and she smiled, untying the ribbon carefully and opening the box, slipping her present from the pouch. It was a diamond pendant in a cluster, but it matched her earrings perfectly. She was delighted by it and felt spoiled.

"It's gorgeous, oh my god," she said, her fingers tracing over the diamonds. "Put it on?" she smiled, as he fastened it around her neck. It hung just below her collarbones and she grinned, leaning in and giving him a kiss. "It's absolutely perfect, I love you," she smiled, as he pulled her close.

"I love you too," he promised her, her other gift in the pocket of his suit jacket.

* * *

They arrived at the restaurant and Meredith knew it immediately. I had been at least six years since she'd been here with the Paris Opera or her mother, but coming here for her birthday was exciting, and Le Meurice was the height of cuisine in Paris. She literally felt like a princess tonight as he led her to a table and champagne was poured. They talked and ate, and he made her feel even more like a princess. The champagne kept flowing and she kept giggling, kissing him across the table.

Once dinner was finished, it was nearly time for the fireworks for Bastille Day, so the pair managed to rush back to their hotel. Derek told her to stay in her finery, that they'd be going out later. She floated out to the balcony in her bare feet, her gown brushing the floor, as she leaned on the baulistrade. It hit 10PM and the fireworks started, and Meredith couldn't help but feel like Rapunzel with the lanterns – the fireworks weren't for her like Rapunzel's lanterns were, but she felt like it anyway. Derek quickly joined her, wrapping his arm around her tiny waist as the fireworks exploded everywhere.

The fireworks went on for awhile, and Meredith found herself lost in them, remembering this from her childhood and loving every second. She didn't notice Derek pulling a ring box out of his jacket pocket, and tugging on her hand. She snapped out of her daze and turned to look at him, but was greeted with a sparkling ring instead.

"Marry me, Meredith," he said, as she pressed a hand to her mouth, starting to cry. "I've been in love with you since the day you walked into the studio. You're it for me, I don't want anyone else and I don't want anyone to come along and take you from me. I love you so much and, because you're still young, we don't have to get married right away. But I know that you're it and I know I want to marry you one day. So will you marry me?"

A million thoughts were rushing through Meredith's head. She knew her parents married young and that was their demise, but this was different. Derek was hers, both in the company and in their personal life, and it was going to happen eventually. Finally, she nodded her head yes, not like it was a difficult decision.

"Yes, yes I'll marry you!" she squealed, getting lost between him slipping the ring onto her finger and rushing into his arms. The fireworks were still going off and Meredith couldn't think of a better proposal.

"Oh my god," she said, looking down at her hand, which now sported a sizeable diamond. "It's beautiful, I just have no words, I mean, I've been thinking about wanting to marry you for ages now, and now…" she trailed off breathlessly.

Derek laughed and pulled her into his arms, twirling them around.

"Well now we have a fantastic story to tell the kids," he laughed.

* * *

 **Okay so it was fun trying to come up with a different proposal than the college story! I think after this I'm going to time jump to London, then we'll see from here! But keep reading, I have lots planned!**


	16. Festa Celtica

Meredith woke up the morning after her birthday, remembering the night before all over again. It had been the most magical night of her life and she still couldn't believe there was a ring on her finger. She was only 19 and she wanted to wait until she was 21 but…she couldn't help but look down at her left hand and be absolutely thrilled with where her life was going. She was 19, a soloist with PNB, and engaged to one of its stars. She couldn't think of anything better. Rolling over, she managed to fall asleep for a few more hours, but eventually she was awake and standing at the window. It was raining this morning, casting everything in fog, but she didn't mind. They were leaving for London this morning where everything was wet anyway.

When she woke up a second time, Derek was awake and she rolled over, smiling at him as he embraced her in a kiss.

"Good morning future Mrs. Shepherd," he grinned, and she couldn't help but grin. She knew professionally she wouldn't change her name, but personally she'd be Mrs. Shepherd. Snuggling up closer she smiled, wanting to chase the grey day away, but she knew she had to get up and dressed so they could watch their flight.

"Mmm I don't think I'll ever tire of hearing that," she smiled brightly as she looked down at the ring on her finger, before looking back up to him and locking him in a kiss.

Finally they had to get up and for traveling, Meredith threw on cropped jeans and a white t-shirt, pulling her hair back in a ponytail. She threw her jumbled casual clothes together, while actual folding her formal clothes and splitting her shoes between both suitcases. Her makeup and hair tools went into her casual suitcase and soon she was ready, with a cardigan and leather jacket with flip-flops for the plane. Croissants were sent up for their breakfast and she nibbled on one, as the pair got ready to head to the airport. She didn't want to leave Paris but they had a few days in London, then they had to return to Seattle to get ready for summer tour. Romeo and Juliet had indeed been selected to go on tour, and they had a week of rehearsals.

* * *

The flight to Heathrow wasn't long, and they took a private car to the Grey household in Kensington. It was large and six stories, and Derek imagined Meredith growing up here. He knew her mother was beyond wealthy, but seeing it was different than hearing about her privileged childhood. Her bedroom was on the fifth floor, large and airy and with everything she could have ever wanted, with a private bathroom and an attached sitting room with a huge TV and literally everything. They dropped their things in the bedroom before heading out to the Royal. Meredith couldn't help but burst into the main studios, where the woman at the front desk rushed at her immediately.

"Meredith Grey! You're back!" she smiled warmly, in a clipped English accent. Meredith couldn't help but smile warmly.

"Marie! I'm here for a few days, this is my boyfriend Derek," she said shyly. She knew she wasn't introducing him to anyone as her fiancée until they told her families. She hugged the woman tightly; she had known her since Meredith was 7 and would come home on holidays from Paris.

"How is your mother? We haven't heard from her since she left," Marie said. Meredith forced a smile and nodded.

"She's well, she's ballet mistress at PNB with me and Derek. Derek is principal, I was promoted to soloist after half a season," she said, blushing a bit and pushing her hair away from her face. "I know my mother arranged that Derek and I guest taught a class of the summer intensive, we were just here to figure out what day you wanted us this week," she said with a cheery smile. It was decided that they were teaching Wednesday; Derek would be teaching technique and Meredith mouth be teaching pointe and variations. With that in mind, they left the Royal and set out back to the Grey house.

* * *

London was fun; not quite as much as Paris, but they had stuff to do. It was another walking city, just a lot cooler, so they grabbed their coats and went out, ending up at the London Eye. Derek had never been to London before so she dragged him up the famous landmark, so they could see all of London. It was a bit cloudy and rainy but she didn't care; being here reminded her of being 13 years old, up until 18, and running around with her friends.

They came off the giant wheel and walked to Buckingham Palace, acting like dorks with the guards, taking pictures and having fun. The day ended when the rain picked up and they headed back to the house to lie around and have some fun. Meredith found herself sprawled on her bed and staring up at the ceiling, listening to the rain plinks against the windows. It reminded her of Seattle, only now she was used to Seattle and not London, but it was nice being in the room she had practically grown up in.

Before she had even realized it, she was waking up from a nap, Derek curled up beside her. It was light out, still, but she could hear the raindrops on the windowpane and she smiled, curling up to Derek even more. She was comfortable and sleepy and if they couldn't go outside, she was going to make the best of it. Drifting off to sleep again, she woke up hours later and it was dark. She rolled over and Derek was gazing at her, looking slightly amused.

"What?" she asked sleepily, letting out a small yawn.

"Nothing, you're just gorgeous," he promised her, pressing a kiss to her forehead. She was starving and rolled over on her stomach, burying her face in her pillow for a second before lifting her head.

"Food?" she asked him, groaning a little. She was at home and she wanted all the benefits of being in England. "We can get something take out though I really want yummy fish and chips," she grinned, falling back into the covers. She didn't feel like putting clothes on but….damn she wanted food. Eventually they both got up and she threw on jeans and a sweater with converse, grabbing a coat. Derek dressed similarly and then they were off into the damp streets; it had finally stopped raining. It reminded Meredith of being in Seattle, and maybe that's why she had taken to Washington so easily.

* * *

Armed with food, the pair returned to the house and ate with a movie on in Meredith's TV room, before eventually returning to bed. The next few days would be busy with teaching classes, and they both knew there wouldn't be much time to lounge around.

Waking up the next morning, both dressed to teach classes, Meredith feeling nervous. Some of these students had been her peers, and now she was teaching them. Now she was above them in the world of ballet. The day went great, as did the next, and by Thursday Meredith and Derek were boarding a plane for a flight to New York to pick up their things from the Shepherds, then onward to Seattle.

* * *

Arriving back in Seattle, Meredith wanted to rush back to the comfort of their house, but they only had time to drop off their suitcases before rushing to rehearse Romeo and Juliet. They only had Friday and the weekend before they went on tour, heading to LA, NYC, DC, Atlanta, and a few other places. They would also be performing Sleeping Beauty, Giselle, Serenade, Symphony in C, and Jewels. Amelia and Meredith were going to be busy, switching off for each other in most/all of the ballets.

Meredith could tell she was slightly out of shape as she danced Juliet, getting out of breath easily and having to rehearse several scenes several times, but eventually she had everything down again. Her mother watched her approvingly, watching her and Amelia face off with laughter. She and Derek had invited Ellis over for dinner Friday night to tell her they were engaged; on their stop in NYC they would be telling Carolyn and Derek's sisters. Amelia, of course, had zeroed in on the ring the moment Meredith had walked into the dressing room.

* * *

Dinner came too soon, and Meredith rushed around as she got things ready. They'd prepared a roast and potatoes, with green beans and plenty of wine to go around. Meredith was dressed in a black dress and flats, her hair straight down her back, and when she heard the doorbell go off the rushed to the door with a smile.

"Hi mom," she smiled, leading her mother inside the house they had lived in for a bit, taking her coat and leading her into the living room. Ellis smiled at the house; she still loved what Derek and Meredith had done with it.

"Hi darling, to what do I owe this pleasure? I see the both of you for hours everyday," Ellis said. Meredith rolled her eyes; Alzheimer's or not, Ellis was still Ellis. Derek joined the Grey women in the living room, his eyes sparkling slightly.

"We just wanted to have you over and we had something to tell you," Meredith said. Her ring was turned under so the diamond wasn't showing, so her mother hadn't seen it. Ellis raised a brow but let the pair go on. Derek wrapped an arm around Meredith's petite waist with a smile.

"We're engaged," Meredith blurted out, turning her ring and holding out her hand to her mother. "I know we're young but we don't plan on getting married for awhile but it just…felt right," she said, on the balls of her feet as she waited for the backlash from Ellis. "We also wanted you to know about it, before anything progressed," Meredith said softly.

Ellis looked up at them after looking up at Meredith's hand with a smile.

"I was 19 and engaged once. My marriage didn't work out but I think for you two, it'll be different. You understand the demands of the stage, of rehearsal times, the commitment. It's perfect. Congratulations, my darling," she said, pulling Meredith into her arms. She definitely hadn't been expecting that.

"And you, Derek, take good care of her, she's something special."

* * *

 **Here's another chapter! Had to figure out how to get them back to the US and tell Ellis :P Hope you like it! Next chapter will be a time jump to the fall season and introduction of some new characters!**


	17. Anitra's Dance

It started with the little things, Meredith noticed. Ellis would forget they hadn't done both sides at the barre, or she would completely blank out on the choreography. Sometimes she would disappear into herself for five minute blocks of time, and then come back to reality. Meredith wasn't highly concerned until it started lasting more than five minutes every so often. Soon is was ten minutes, then it was fifteen, twenty, thirty, an hour, then it became several hours.

Then came the day her mother looked up at her and Derek while they were rehearsing Romeo and Juliet on the stage at the Metropolitan Opera House. They had just rehearsed the Balcony Pas and were waiting for a critique when Ellis shook her head at the pair.

"You're too young to be getting married, you're such a disappointment Meredith. I raised you to be extraordinary," she said, leaving the theater shaking her head. Meredith deflated somewhat. She knew in the back of her head her mother was rapidly deteriorating, but the comment – that was the Ellis she knew. With tears in her eyes she left the stage, heading to her dressing room to take a few deep breaths. She knew it was too good to be true, her mother being nice and accepting. It had been the disease burrowing into her brain, making her some other kind of person.

The dressing room was abandoned and she slipped into the bathroom, locking herself in there and sliding down to the floor so she could cry. She wasn't sure why she was crying; she had known about her mothers illness for quite some time now. Perhaps it was watching her deteriorate in front of her that was killing her slowly.

Soon enough there was a knock on the bathroom door.

"Meredith?" Derek said in a heavy voice. "I know you're in there. I just. Come out," he said, trying to coax her out. Meredith reached out and unlocked the door but she didn't climb out from her spot under the sink. Derek came in and looked down; his crying fiancée was hiding between the pipes in the theatre sinks.

"Oh Mere," he said, sitting down next to her as she cried.

"It's harder watching it. I was okay at first. I was fine. But then it started to get worse as the tour started. And it got worse fast. And now. What she just said. That was her. Her acceptance of our engagement? That was the disease talking. All the nice things she's done for me, that was the disease," she said bitterly. Her makeup was smudging but she didn't really care. She was in pain and she couldn't watch this as it happened.

"I think, when we get home, while she's still somewhat lucid, I'll have to get her into a home," she said, looking down at her pointe shoes and at how dirty they were. She sighed, playing with a loose ribbon. "She can't live on her own anymore, she can't teach class. I've been noticing periods where she's lucid and longer periods where she's not," she said, looking up at Derek tearfully. He reached forward and pulled her into his arms.

Derek held her for awhile and let her cry it out, rubbing her back and giving her water from his water bottle.

"Hey, Meredith, it's okay, it's going to be okay. I know it isn't easy watching your mother, but Webber will be understanding and you have my family if you want another one," he said teasingly. She picked up her head only to put it on his shoulder. She knew they should go back to the stage but she was so reluctant. Tonight was their first show of 8 in NYC and they needed to rehearse. She heaved a sigh and stood up, stretching out her limbs.

"Okay let's go."

* * *

Taking the stage at the Metropolitan Opera House was different from McCaw Hall, both in title, size, and prestige. Their first show there went without a hitch, and the east coast was introduced to Meredith and Derek. Again, they stayed up all night waiting for the reviews, but more importantly they stayed up with his family waiting for reviews, despite knowing how exhausted they would be in the morning.

After NYC was Boston, after Boston was Atlanta, after Atlanta was Chicago. Dancing at Joffrey was a dream come true, taking class with the company and letting them watch their rehearsals. From Chicago they went to Houston, then on to LA, and finally they returned home to Seattle, completely worn out. Meredith dragged herself and her bags up to the second floor of the house, while Derek fell onto the couch, the two of them needing to do laundry badly but too exhausted to.

In the morning though, Meredith woke up to Derek with a small sigh.

"I need to talk to my mother. Or Webber. Or both," she said, throwing back the covers. It was an early September day; she had been at PNB for a year. Derek pulled her down and gave her a warm, tender kiss on her lips.

"You don't have to do this alone, Mere," he said, as she stared off into space. She knew it was one of the hardest things she'd ever have to do, and she was barely 19.

"I know I don't," she said, tears spilling from her eyes as she pulled on leggings and a nice sweater, pushing her feet into black flats and looking around for her bag. Realizing it was downstairs, she grabbed her phone and gave Derek another kiss. "I'm going to Webber first and then going to talk to my mom. I have a list of homes she's on the waiting list for, for when this happened," she said, wiping her cheeks and heading downstairs, hopping into her car.

* * *

Meredith knew where Richard lived, so she went to his house first. Knocking on the door, she bit her lip and looked around. He lived in a different house than he had when she was younger, but somehow Meredith still knew. His wife, Adele, answered the door.

"Hi, um, I'm Meredith Grey, I'm one of Richard's dancers…" she said, trailing off as Adele nodded with understanding.

"Of course. I know who you are, I used to watch you when your mother danced at PNB with Richard. She'd bring you to the studios and you were a little ball of energy, running around in a tiny little tutu looking just like your mother," Adele said. Meredith forced a smile and entered the well-decorated house, as Adele called for Richard.

"That sounds about right. We moved to Paris when I was five, then my mother moved to London when I was seven but I stayed in Paris," Meredith smiled slightly, looking at the photos on the wall. Most of them were of Richards favorites, she noticed, as she found one of her and Derek dancing the Pas of Rubies.

"Would you like anything to drink, Meredith?" Adele asked, and Meredith quickly whirled around.

"Oh, no thank you, I just have to talk to Master Webber about something quite important," she smiled, the manners of a girl raised in England coming out. Soon Richard came into the room, and ushered Meredith into his home office where she took a seat in one of the chairs.

"To what do I owe this pleasure to Miss Grey?" he asked her with a smiled. Meredith set her mouth in a firm line.

"It's about my mother, sir. I think…no, I know, that her Alzhiemers has progressed to the point where she cannot make her own decisions anymore. In class Derek and I have noticed her leaving reality for minutes at first, then hours. First she was quite excited about our engagement, and then it was back to yelling at me for being unfocused and normal and ordinary, just like the Ellis we both know. I think…I think her good moods have been because of the disease, they've made her into a new person. I think it's time she moves into an assisted living center, and you're the next person I know, besides me and Derek, who knows her," she finished, clearing her throat and trying not to cry. She was only 19, her mother didn't recognize her half the time, and she had no relationship with her father. The only people she had in the world, family wise, were Derek and the rest of the Shepherds. Cristina was her best friend, as well as Amelia.

Webber bent his head, shaking it back and forth.

"I'm so sorry Meredith, I can only imagine how hard this is for you. I'd be happy to give you time off to do whatever it is you need-"

"Respectfully sir, I don't need any time off. I refuse to be behind, and I refuse to stop working towards the top just because my mother needs attention. I am not unfocused, it's simply another obstacle in my life," she said steadily, raising her chin.

Webber looked back at the 19 year old in front of him. Formiddable, just like her mother. Ambitious, power hungry, wanting the best for herself and the most out of life. Yes, this was Ellis Grey's child. He flashed her a smile and a nod.

"Of course. I'll see you in the studio next week after the rest of your break," he said to her as they both stood up. Meredith shook his hand as Webber led her out of the office and house.

* * *

Meredith spent most of her day calling assisted living homes, mainly those that specialized in taking care of Alzheimers patients. Roseridge had an opening and Meredith leaped, wanting to get her mother in as soon as possible. Driving over to her mothers apartment, she parked and headed upstairs, wanting to get this over with as soon as possible.

Letting herself in, she looked around the apartment for her mother. It was a guessing game these days; her mother had progressed in a matter of a few weeks since they had been on tour.

"Mother? Mom?" she called, finding her in the bedroom. She was going through pages of photo albums of both her and Meredith dancing – young Ellis in her days at PNB, little Meredith in her first leotard. Ellis looked up at her daughter, confused.

"Who is this? Why do I have so many pictures of this person?" she asked her, and Meredith's heart broke.

"Mommy, your memory is broken. But I'm going to take care of you. We're going to get you into a home where people can watch you around the clock and take care of you, and I'll visit you every day, because even though you weren't the best mom to me, I know you tried. You tried really hard. You didn't want a child but I was there, and you did everything you knew how," she said, tears falling from her eyes again. She reached over and hugged Ellis; she knew that she didn't know what was going on, and that yes, her mother had been a terrible mother growing up, but she loved her.

* * *

The week had been spent packing up her mothers things and putting some things into storage, other things going with her to Roseridge. The next Monday, Meredith was at her usual space at the barre, in front of Derek and behind Lexie, ready to work her ass off. She was called to rehearse Giselle with Amelia as Myrtha, Odette/Odile, Alice from Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, and Les Sylphides, and a few shorter Balanchine ballets. She was filled to the brim and she was back in her happy place for the second year among people she was friends with like April, Cristina, and Amelia, and those that projected their jealousy, like Izzie. There were tons of new faces, like a bubbly African-American girl who was busy taming her hair as she came into the room.

"Is there any sort of order at the barre?" she said, finally getting her hair into a bun and rushing into a spot in front of Lexie. Lexie, to her effort, made a face at Derek and Meredith about the new girl.

"Sorry, hi, I'm Maggie, I was just hired as a corps member, I'm sixteen, I'm from Seattle. My mom apparently danced in this company so I'm like, holy crap, wow, big shoes to fill!" she breathed. Meredith was annoyed by how sunny and happy she seemed and narrowed her eyes at her.

"Who's your mother?" Meredith asked, tapping her foot on the floor. She was the ballet royalty around here and until now, she didn't realize how much weight she pulled with that.

"Oh um, her name was Ellis Grey, I've never met her or anything, just seen a ton of photos of her and loads of videos, I was adopted."

Nothing could stop the look of shock and horror on Meredith's face.

"I think I'm going to be sick," she murmured, as she bolted from the studio and ran for her bathroom in the dressing room.

* * *

 **So here's Maggie! Luckily she's so awesome so Mere won't be hating her long (like on the show) but it's going to take lots of convincing for Mere to realize she's really her sister and TWO of her sisters are dancing with her! I considered making her a soloist right away but felt that was unfair haha. Anyway let me know what you think! I hope you all thought I had a plan for Ellis ;) I wouldn't just let her be super nice all of a sudden!**


	18. New World Symphony

Meredith found herself retching over one of the toilets in her dressing room. She had three sisters. Three fucking sisters, and one was Ellis's daughter. By the looks of her, it was easy to tell who her father was. Meredith had known from a young age that her mother had been having an affair with Richard; putting two and two together this explained their quick flight to France when Meredith was five. She had a baby, put her up for adoption, never told Richard, divorced Thatcher, and ran off to France with Meredith. She was 19, she wasn't stupid.

Heaving over the toilet again, she coughed violently, throwing up her breakfast, sweat pouring down her face. This was too much. Her mother being sick, finding out she had another sister, and not being able to talk about it. She heard the bathroom door open and the thud of pointe shoes on the floor.

"Meredith Grey almost Shepherd, open that stall right now," demanded Amelia. Meredith reluctantly unlatched the door and slumped against the stall, feeling gross and worse for wear. Amelia sat against the wall that looked into the stall, facing her.

"At least she's nice?" Amelia offered, and Meredith threw a wad of toilet paper at her, before leaning over to vomit again.

"This is now how I wanted to spend the first day of the season, learning I have another fucking sister who I dance with," she spat out, wiping her mouth with toilet paper. Her stomach growled, signaling it was empty, and she wiped her face with some more toilet paper. Her pink leotard was spotted with sweat and she groaned.

"I have half a mind to march into Webber's office and tell him his daughter is in that goddamn studio, all bright eyed and bushy tailed, all, oh my gosh I'm a professional dancer, my mother if FREAKING ELLIS GREY" she yelled, kicking her pointe-shoed feet against the aluminum of the bathroom stall. She might lead a charmed life on the surface but underneath the dark and twisty was starting to stumble out. Amelia reached out, offering her water and she sipped it slowly, tears running down her face.

"Beyond Derek, my life is unbelievably fucked up," she admitted, staring off into space for a bit.

* * *

Eventually Amelia got Meredith back on her feet, and the pair slipped into the studio, joining everyone for barre. They had missed much of it and joined in at rande de jombes, Meredith's leg extending in a developpe that almost hit her in the face. She was in an intense mood and it reflected in her dancing; Derek had to lean over and tell her to calm down a few times. In the center she stood in her usual spot, front and center, attacking each move and position like it was her last time dancing it. It certainly earned approval from Bailey.

"Nice work Meredith, hopefully you can channel some of that energy into Odette later, we're starting with Swan Lake this season," she said, moving on to the next dancer. Meredith was angry and hurt, and channeling it into her dancing was what she did best. When it was time for turns, Meredith attacked every pirouette, every a la seconde, and especially every fouette. If she was to perform Odette and Odile, she had to be on top of her impressive fouettes. After completing her requisite 32, but well over 48, she felt a presence behind her, noticing the girl in the mirror. _Her sister_ , her conscience told her, but mentally her sister was Lexie, who she had grown to adore fondly.

"Can I help you?" she asked, turning around, her bangs unpinned as she tucked them back with bobby pins. Maggie looked at her meekly, almost scared of the older girl.

"Um, I just wanted to say that you're amazing. Like. Really an amazing dancer. How do you do it? How did you become so amazing?" Maggie asked her. Meredith had noticed her turning as well; she was good for being barely fifteen.

"My mother is Ellis Grey," she said coldly, almost flippantly, before turning on the heel of her pointe shoes and exiting the room for now. Maggie stood in her wake, staring at the small blonde girl with a serious attitude. Meredith made her way to her dressing room where she grabbed her practice tutu and another pair of pointe shoes, filling up her water bottle with ice and water, before heading back to the studio. They were starting with the little swans so Meredith perched by the back barre, Derek beside her as he had the role of Prince Siegfried. Siegfried appears in the first act, but they were teaching the Waltz portion without him.

"Mere, what did you do to Maggie?" Derek whispered to her as she watched. She lifted her chin to look at him, her delicate features masked.

"Nothing, she asked where I learned to dance as well as I do and I told her my mother is Ellis Grey," she said innocently. Derek shook his head slightly.

"Mere..." he wheedled and she sighed.

"I know I shouldn't have but she asked. I don't like people coming in with some birthright line that, oh their mother is my mother. She might've been a horrible mother to me and her pleasantries may have been from disease but she's **my** mother and I was never taught to share things," she said haughtily, staring him down. He stared right back at her, running his fingers through his hair. She was certainly a force of nature to be reckoned with.

Soon Prince Siegfried was called to dance and Meredith was stuck at the back barre stretching, watching him interact with the party guests. Eventually they moved on to the second act, and Meredith was called to the center, the corps girls flocking around her as they danced, Meredith's steps guided towards Derek as they interacted. Odette and Odile was a difficult role, but she was excited about it; she knew it would cement her place in the company for years if the reviews were great. She danced to her full potential, acting out the pantomime between Siegfried and Odette, especially as Odette transformed into a Princess before his eyes.

* * *

Later on, Meredith could feel Maggie hovering behind her and she refused to turn around and indulge her. She continued chatting with Amelia and Lexie, before she was called to rehearse the next ballet. Alice's Adventures in Wonderland was new for the company and Meredith was Alice, with Derek as the Knave of Hearts. They started by rehearsing their Pas de Deux and were having fun with it. The Royal had originated it, which made Meredith feel even more amazing to be dancing it – it was her mother's choreography. She jumped and twirled and was lifted into the air more times than she could count, all of her troubles from earlier in the day melting away as she danced, as they always did. It was magical and as she and Derek danced she knew that things were going great. Taking the final pose of the dance she smiled at their reflection. It was one of the most fun Pas she'd ever done and it was just literally perfection to her as they finished in time to the fairy-like music. Bailey applauded them and had them run it several more times, before running other sections of the ballet with both of them and other characters.

Despite having a terrible morning, Meredith was having an amazing rehearsal and was truly happy. Light on her feet as the flighty Alice, she seemed to float on the marley of the studio floor, always being caught by her Knave, the corps always flanking her as some character or another. The red queen was played by Amelia, tiny and quick on her feet as well, and she was just having a blast and knew she'd love the ballet.

* * *

After rehearsal was over, Meredith was joking and laughing with Lexie as they went to their respective dressing rooms when she felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned and found it was Maggie. She was tired of running from this bothersome girl and sighed, turning.

"What is you want from me?" she exhaled, noting that the girl was a few inches taller than she was.

"We have the same mother. You're the only biological sibling I have," she said in a small voice as she looked down at her pointe shoes. Meredith sighed; she had two sisters already, she felt like she didn't need another.

"What's your point? I just found out I have two sisters. You're my third. You don't want to know about Ellis. I mean I know you do, but it's a lot to handle," she pointed out. She wanted to run and hide in her dressing room, especially when Amelia walked past her, but she didn't know how to break away.

"But she's my mother too," Maggie insisted, and Meredith's eyes darkend.

"No Maggie, she's not. She gave you up for adoption and now you come seeking her? You know nothing about her or what she's done or where she is right now. She doesn't even know who I am, and she certainly wouldn't know who you are. So please stop bringing her up to me because it's already painful enough," she said, using this as an opportunity to break away and dash off to her dressing room for a shower.

* * *

 **What do you think? Is Meredith being too harsh on Maggie?**

 **Sorry It's taking me forever to update my stories! I've been in LA since Wednesday but I'm going home tomorrow Then back to school I plan to write on my flight home as long as my computer holds up hahaha I've been drinking too much tequila and having Meredith Grey moments ;) There's this awesome store out here in Burbank that sells clothes from ABC shows and I've been begging my friends to go with me but no one would Next time I'm here it's a priority!**


	19. Habanera

It had been two weeks and Meredith was still giving Maggie the cold shoulder. Everywhere she went, Maggie followed her, expressing how amazing she was and how much she looked and danced like **their** mother. It was too much for Meredith to handle, although she was trying to keep her cool in the studio, especially while rehearsing Alice and Swan Lake. She was a professional, she could do this.

Today Meredith, Mark, and Derek were working on the Pas de Trois from Alice, which Meredith was having fun with just because she was getting tossed around between the two men. There was so much giggling happening as the threesome worked out the complicated lifts together. Earlier Derek had been working with Izzie and Cristina on the Waltz part of Swan Lake, but Meredith much preferred this rather than standing on the sidelines. The style was more contemporary and exotic, and she loved every bit of it. The entire company was in the ballet in one form or another, with the soloists and principals getting the better parts. Amelia was the Queen of Hearts, and Meredith loved watching her dance.

Unfortunately the drama didn't stop with their hard work at rehearsals. Maggie shadowed Meredith constantly; she was sneaky about it but Meredith could tell she was doing it. During her costume fittings for Swan Lake, Meredith caught her striding into the costume room to get fitted as well and Meredith sighed. Maggie was chatty and perky, and while Meredith was a happy, bright person, Maggie was just…too much. And she was her sister. The dresser did her work, taking in the white tutu on Meredith's tiny, slim form, and Meredith was forced to make eye contact with Maggie. She forced a small smile before turning away, but of course Maggie started chatting.

"Oh my gosh, you look so gorgeous, you're going to be so amazing in Swan Lake," she gushed. Meredith played with her hair, nodding along as she tried not to talk to the younger girl, but it was increasingly frustrating. "You're only in your second season as a soloist and you're getting principal roles, that's insane!" she said, as she was moved around to get her costume fit to her. Meredith sighed.

"Well, I was taught by the best and Webber would have me as principal if it was kosher," she said, staring at herself in the mirror. She was 19 years old, engaged, and seemed to have a perfect life on the surface and she wasn't about to let Maggie see what lurked underneath.

"What about you? You're in the corps at 15. You must be some wonder child," she yawned, but truthfully she had already joined the Royal at 15. Ellis wouldn't have had it any other way.

"Um well I started dancing when I was younger, around five, and I was just a natural, so my parents enrolled me here and I joined the pre-professional program and auditioned for the company," Maggie shrugged. Meredith nodded slightly. A lot of the girls at PNB had danced at their studio, but some had grown up elsewhere.

"I was born here but grew up in Paris and London," she said, rotating again for the seamstress. She was in love with the feathered, beaded, crystal-strewn tutu and couldn't believe she'd be wearing it for weeks of shows. She eyed Maggie to see her response.

"Let me guess. Mommy dearest gave birth to me and ran off to Europe with you?" she asked. Meredith pressed her lips together and shrugged.

"I…honestly, I don't remember. I wasn't five yet. One day I was with my mom in the house I live in now, then the next we were living in an apartment over the Sienne. I don't remember her being pregnant, I don't…I don't remember there being a baby," she admitted, hanging her head down and playing with her engagement ring, before looking up.

"I'm pretty sure I know who your dad is though. He's a lot closer than you think. Your mom…our mom. She's…not. It's complicated," she breathed. She wasn't ready to tell Maggie that the mother she idolized as a ballerina, the mother she knew was out there and alive, would have no idea who she was, and would have no remembrance of her. Finally the seamstress told Meredith she was finished and she slipped out of the gorgeous costume and gave Maggie a weak smile.

"I'll see you upstairs at rehearsals," she told the young girl, before fleeing the room.

* * *

Meredith ran into Lexie in the hall and followed her, whining a bit.

"Okay so like, you knew you were my sister, but how did you deal with it? Because I simply cannot deal with Maggie being my sister. She's so perky and peppy and all 'Go team go'! And I'm just not. And I can't tell her about my mothers condition, or who her dad is, and I can't tell Webber, and oh my god how the fuck do I keep getting into these messes?" she rambled as she pulled on her white practice tutu in the hallway outside the studio. Men's class was still going on and Meredith peeked in, smiling at Derek. Lexie had her eye on Mark, who smirked back at her, causing her to whip her head back at Meredith.

"Oh my god, Lex, just go out with him!" she laughed, leaning down to tuck a ribbon back into the knot of her pointe shoe. When she straightened up she made a face at Derek, throwing him off in his turns. Lexie shook her head.

"First off, I was super pumped to meet my cool older sister who was already nationally known as an amazing dancer, who is inbred and the daughter of Ellis Grey. You're perky and peppy once people get to know you. You're nice, you're fun, you joke around and everyone loves you. You're the darling of the company, everyone wants to be you. You'll eventually find a way to tell her about Ellis, and she'll find out some way about Webber. And for the record we've been out on three dates and he's pretty fantastic in bed," she said smugly, pinning back her bangs with a bobby pin.

Meredith's eyes widened and she shrieked, clapping a hand over her mouth.

"Alexandra Caroline Grey, you're 16! He's 27!" she laughed, shaking her head. Sure she had sex around that age as well but never with someone so much older than she was.

"So what! You're not that much older than I am and you're engaged to Derek!" Lexie retorted, and the two girls were laughing like crazy in the doorway of the studio. It was basically everything Meredith had ever dreamed of, having a sister and sharing everything with her including being close with her. In the back of her mind she knew she could have that with Maggie, it was just the suddenness of her showing up and proclaiming she was Ellis's daughter that really got to her, especially when Meredith didn't remember her mother being pregnant.

Once men's class was over, she and Lexie pranced into the room; it was time for Pas class. They had to keep up their hard work for when they used the poses in their repertoire. Meredith slid over to Derek, shrieking when he did stool lift, Meredith sitting on his shoulder as he carried her around the room, showing her off to everyone. She giggled, loving sitting up so high, her toes pointed and her arms in high fifth before he swept her into a fish dive gracefully, her face inches from the floor, before catching her beautifully, still sweeping her off her feet.

"I'm going to enjoy spending the rest of my life making magic with you," she giggled, offering him a kiss, not noticing Maggie watching the pair.

* * *

After class and rehearsals were over for the day, Meredith was changing in her dressing room when Maggie knocked at the door, walking in to meet her. She was in her bra and a skirt, working on pulling a shirt on when Maggie held out a piece of paper. Meredith unfolded it and looked down; it was her birth certificate. Margaret Grey, it said, along with her birthday and Seattle Grace Hospital. Grey. They shared a last name. Lexie and Molly were somehow also related to her in some round about way.

"I was hoping you knew who my father was since she didn't list one," she explained. Meredith bit her lip and pulled a tank top over her head, slipping her beaten feet into flip-flops.

"Maggie, I don't think you want to go there…."

"So you know who he is?" she said eagerly, and Meredith cringed.

"I have an idea, but he has no idea that you're his daughter, or that Ellis was pregnant," she sighed. She went over to her mirror, releasing the pins that held her bun tight.

"I just want answers. I was adopted hours after my birth. I love my parents but I've always known I was adopted, I've always known my mother is the great Ellis Grey, I've always wanted to meet her." Meredith leaned over the area in front of her mirror before standing up with a small smile.

"Come, I'll take you to meet her," she said. Grabbing her things, she led Maggie out of her dressing room, stopping at Derek's to tell him where she was going. She led Maggie out to her car, basking in the waning sunlight. They had two hours before rehearsal, so they had time. Roseridge wasn't too far from PNB. The sisters were quiet during the drive, as Maggie had no idea where they were going, and when Meredith parked, she motioned for her to get out. They headed inside and Meredith smiled at the receptionist.

"Hello, I'm Meredith Grey, here to see Ellis Grey. I hope I've caught her at a good time," she said pleasantly. Maggie still looked confused as they were led to a private lounge and they sat down. Meredith turned to Maggie and took a deep breath.

"About a year ago, my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. It wasn't terrible at first but she left England to teach us at PNB. Then we started to notice her symptoms getting worse very rapidly, so I worked to get her a place here. She has her good and bad days, hopefully today will be good. Some days she has no idea who I am. Other days she knows who I am and tells me I'm a huge disappointment and I'll never amount to anything despite my achievements, but that's just the type of person she is," she said, taking a deep breath. Ellis entered the room and sat down opposite of the two girls.

"Hi, mom," Meredith said, tentatively giving her a smile. Ellis looked at her up and down and smiled slightly.

"Meredith, you're all grown up, look at you," she said, taking in her daughter's features. She looked just like a younger version of her. Slim, lithe, packed into a dancer's body. "Who is this?" she asked, gesturing to Maggie. Meredith took a deep breath.

"This is Margaret Pierce. Or Grey," she said, letting the bomb drop and the look of shock wash over her mothers face. Ellis froze, taking in Maggie's form. She was tiny, like Meredith; the two girls had the same build.

"How…I don't understand. It was private…everything was private, I closed all ties," she said frantically. Maggie bit her lip.

"My birth certificate has your name on it. I grew up following you through dance. I'm in the corps at PNB. I didn't know Meredith was my sister until she mentioned it one day," she explained, avoiding how exactly Meredith had told her. Ellis was still fretting, scratching at her hands, a nervous tic she had developed with the Alzheimer's. Meredith sighed.

"Mom, Maggie just wanted to meet you. She doesn't want anything from you. She just wanted to meet you. She has parents who love her and an entirely different life than she would have had with us. She also has no idea who her father is," she said, side-eyeing Ellis. Ellis, for the record, bit her lip and nodded, before looking at Maggie.

"It's, er, nice to meet you. I'm glad you have a lovely family. I wouldn't have been able to give you what you needed. Meredith spent her life in ballet boarding schools and never saw me, she doesn't know her father," she said, still fretting. Meredith heaved another sigh.

In the next moment, everything changed though. Ellis started to look confused as the looked at her two daughters, specifically Maggie.

"Do I know you?" she questioned, before turning to Meredith.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to interrupt me while I'm rehearsing, Meredith? Where is your nanny?" Meredith shrunk in her seat, before rushing out of the room to get the nurse. They both came back, and the nurse escorted Ellis out of the room as she continued to sundown. Maggie and Meredith headed back to the car and Meredith sat in the driver's seat, staring off into the distance.

"So. That's our mother," she said quietly, playing with her hair. Maggie nodded slightly, her head against the window.

"I'm sorry she's not everything you dreamed of," she whispered, reaching over for Maggie's hand and giving it a squeeze. "But now you've met her. And she was actually pleasant towards you, you got lucky. Usually I get screamed at and told I'm worthless and that I never should've been born," she said, looking out the window. Soon enough Meredith gathered herself and drove back to the studios, where the two girls climbed out of the car and headed back inside. As Meredith paused in the doorway of her dressing room, she lifted her chin.

"I think you should have a talk with Webber about our mother."

* * *

 **So yay Maggie and Meredith finally talked and bonded a bit and Maggie met Ellis! I had this idea that grew and just blossomed and I loved it!**

 **P.S. Check my profile, I added a link to a picture of me being ballerina Meredith ;) and yes I'm a real dancer!**


	20. Dance of the Hours

It was Friday; Alice was opening on Tuesday. Meredith had nervous anticipation as they ran through dress rehearsal. Her blonde hair hung down her back, held back only by a black headband and strategically placed bobby pins. A blue silk-chiffon dress clung to her slender figure as she went through the moves of Alice. The ballet was trippy and avant-garde, she wasn't going to lie, but it was different from the things PNB usually performed and she loved it. As the rehearsal finished, they all took notes from Webber and Bailey and went over the parts that needed work, before they were allowed to go home for the night. Usually they had Monday's off, but this Monday they had another intense dress rehearsal and class before opening Tuesday.

This weekend though, Meredith was finally letting Derek drag her camping. She knew she was going to be absolutely miserable and hate it, but he was so excited about it. They were leaving tonight; the other night he had come home and tossed a bunch of clothes at her in her size that she would need along with hiking boots and she had pouted but to no avail.

"Derek, I have literally never been in the wilderness before. I've grown up in mansions, and huge gilded theaters, and ballet studios, dressed in ornate tutus and traveling the world for ballet competitions. I am a girly girl, I am so not a camping girl," she told him, shaking her head as she packed everything he gave her in the back pack he had also given her. There was no getting out of this, especially since the entire company knew because he had been giddy and told everyone.

Slipping out of her costume and pointe shoes, she said goodbye to her friends, waving goodbye to Maggie and throwing her arms around Lexie.

"If I get eaten by a bear, don't let Thatcher and Susan bury me in regular clothes. I want to be surrounded by all my dead pointe shoes and wearing my Aurora costume," she declared dramatically, as Lexie shook with laughter.

"Of course, Mere, although if you get eaten by a bear I don't think there will be much left of you." Meredith stuck her tongue out, grabbing her bag and heading out into the hall where Derek was waiting for her.

"Sorry, I had to confirm with Lex how I wanted to be buried," she teased as she looked up at him. He leaned down and kissed her deeply while they waited for the elevator to take them to the parking lot.

"You're not going to be eaten by a bear. I'm not going to let that happen. At most, a rabbit might bite you," he teased he, wanting to run his fingers through her hair but it was still pulled back tightly.

"You're so mean to me," she giggled as they got into the car, heading back to their house. Once they were home they both quickly showered before changing into something warm; it was only September but Seattle was chilly at night. Braiding her hair tightly, knowing she wouldn't take it out over the weekend.

"I'm going to die in the woods," she whined as she pulled a shirt on over her tank top.

"No you aren't, stop whining," he laughed, grabbing both of their backpacks and her hand, dragging her downstairs. Most of the car was already packed and Derek put their things in as Meredith climbed in the passenger seat, wary about the weekend. She was not the type to enjoy this. She ran, she would hike with him, but camping was an entirely different story.

* * *

They drove about an hour and a half from their house and away from Seattle; the sun was still shining as the pavement turned to dirt roads and houses turned to dense forest. Meredith pressed her head against the window, watching the world go by. They were climbing higher into the mountains and it was never-ending it seemed, until finally Derek stopped the car at a campsite by a lake. Meredith had to admit, it was idyllic and pretty, and she was slowly letting herself warm up to the idea of spending the weekend here.

"Come on" Derek grinned, poking her in the arm. She climbed out of the car, surprised by how much cooler it was than back in Seattle, and grabbed her fleece, slipping it on and zipping it up. She watched him unload the car of their things, putting everything where he told her to place it, feeling sort of useless but he was in his element and seemed to be enjoying it. Once the tent was standing he swooped down and gave her a kiss.

"I'll start the fire and you can put everything in the tent, deal?" he grinned, her arms sliding around him. She nodded and reached up for another kiss, grabbing sleeping bags and tarps and pillows, climbing inside the tent to make up a bed for them. She was smart enough to know what order everything went in on the ground and in no time at all she was climbing out of the tent, only to find a blazing campfire. She smiled, wrapping her arms around Derek from behind.

"You really are McDreamy," she teased him as he stood up, Meredith on his back and she squealed.

"Come on I'm gonna throw you in the lake," he grinned as he took off at a run towards the water as she giggled and yelled

"I don't think Bailey or Webber would condone this sort of partnering," she teased him as he stopped just on the rocky shore, inches from the water. She slid off his back and stood at his side, lacing her fingers through his.

"How can you hate nature? It's beautiful," he said quietly, pulling her close to him. She sighed; she couldn't disagree with him there.

"It is beautiful. But it's more beautiful from inside a house," she giggled. The sun was starting to set and it was getting colder out, and she was already exhausted from dancing all day. Derek could tell she was tired and he kissed her forehead.

"Go lay down and I'll get dinner ready, okay?" Meredith nodded, reaching up and giving him a kiss before retreating to the tent, kicking off her boots and climbing under the blankets, falling easily into a deep sleep.

The next thing she knew Derek was laying down beside her and waking her up. Her lips turned up in a smile as she lifted her head to meet his gaze.

"Hey," she said sleepily, brushing wispies out of her eyes.

"Hey," he responded with a kiss, beckoning her out of the tent. She sighed and slipped out from under the blankets, pulling her Uggs on and stumbling out of the tent. It was completely dark outside except for the campfire and she smiled, joining Derek on a wide log he had found.

"Here," he grinned, handing her a plate of fish, rice, and potatoes. Meredith made a face at the fish.

"Mere you love fish!" he laughed, poking her in the arm.

"Yeah, fish you buy in the store that are in neat little pieces and you don't have to chop their heads off and gut them!" she laughed, tasting a piece. Like everything he had ever cooked for her, it was delicious but she wasn't about to admit that she now liked trout or anything like that. They ate in silence for awhile, the two of them still exhausted from dancing this morning. Once they were finished they cleaned their plates appropriately, stowing all food in the car before returning to the fire. He held her in his arms for awhile, before checking his phone; it was definitely time to go to bed and she was half asleep anyway. Picking her up, they both crawled under the blankets, falling into a deep sleep.

* * *

The rest of their weekend camping went well; Derek taught her how to fish, even though she didn't catch anything worthwhile, and they hiked through the mountains, Meredith in awe of the state she was born in, but had barely lived in. Derek had camped here many times before and was loving that Meredith was taking this positively. Sunday night they packed everything up and went home, dirty and tired but feeling fulfilled from their weekend away.

Monday came too soon, with Meredith puling on pink tights full of holes and a threadbare black leotard, twisting her hair into a bun in the half-darkness of their bedroom. Clothes were found and pulled on the both of them, and somehow they and their dance bags made it to the car.

Company class was a blur; Meredith took her usual spot between Lexie and Derek, moving through the steps and motions as if she were a robot. When Alice was called to rehearse she knew she had to perk up, so she ran downstairs to the café for a second cup of coffee. It started working partway through the first act, and she was good to go as she twirled on stage as Alice in the costume that had been made just for her.

Later that evening she stood in the wings, nervously awaiting the music that signals her entrance. Erica, another blonde, played Alice's sister, and the curtain opened on the two of them reading underneath a tree, and the ballet took off from there, following the Alice in Wonderland story closely with an amazing avant-garde twist.

Everything went off without a hitch and in no time at all, the entire cast were taking their final bows. Meredith ran from the wing to the front, where everyone clapped for her and she soaked up the love from the crowd. This was her job, this was what she loved to do. She stepped back and linked arms with Mark and Derek, the entire cast bowing and curtsying, smiling like crazy beneath the sweat and melting makeup. Once the curtain dropped their arms dropped and they began hugging each other over another show well done.

* * *

Alice, Swan Lake, and Giselle were to run until the week of Thanksgiving; the company would then have a break of performances until the day after Thanksgiving. Around mid-October Nutcracker roles went up, but even before then rumors were flying.

"Meredith Grey is going to be Sugar Plum, she did it last year from Addison, remember? And then she got promoted."

"No, Amelia's going to be Sugar Plum, she's more senior."

"She might be more senior but Meredith has more pull, her mother is Ellis Grey."

"Then who's going to be Clara? What if it were Lexie or Maggie? They ARE Meredith's sisters, you know."

One day Meredith couldn't take it anymore, she couldn't stop blocking everyone out and she glared across the room, not even surprised that Izzie was one of the ones perpetuating the rumors.

"Roles are given out based on talent, merit, and position in the company. Maybe if you didn't run your mouth so much and worked on your technique more you'd get better roles," she said, an eyebrow raised towards her general group, before she picked up her things and walked out. Truthfully, she was eager to find out what she would be dancing in the Nutcracker, but she would never stoop low and gossip outright. Rolling her eyes as she left the room, she figured Lexie would get her when it was time to rehearse Swan Lake for tonight.

* * *

 **I thought it would be cute to have Derek show Meredith a different side of him besides dancing** **I'm trying to add in more than just dance so I get more readers and don't bore the readers I already have! As always, read and review.**


	21. Now We Are Free

In mid-October, during a flurry of performances where they switched off between three ballets every day during the week, excitement for Nutcracker began to mount. Rumors began to fly about who would get what role and who would be stuck repeating roles again. All Meredith could do was roll her eyes; it was Izzie and her little band of followers/haters who were starting the rumors and she knew they were just jealous. She knew Izzie was bitter because she was a soloist stuck in corps roles, but really that was through no fault of her own. She spent her days bitching about everyone else instead of working on her technique and learning roles she wasn't called for. Meredith took it upon herself to learn everything; she never knew when she might be thrust on stage like she had last Nutcracker when Addison had snapped her achillies.

Finally the day came when the casting for Nutcracker was pinned to the board. The company rushed to see what they had been cast as but Meredith held back, not wanting to jump in and be shoved around. She heard a disgruntled moan from Izzie, guessing that she was stuck in the corps again. Meredith continued to mingle around the bulletin board until the crowd thinned out, before stepping up and reading the list as follows:

PARTY ADULTS Entire company

PARTY CHILDREN PNB Students

SNOW CORPS Alexandra Grey, Isobel Stevens, April Kepner, Josephine Wilson, Stephanie Edwards, Sadie Harris, Megan Mostow, Sydney Heron, Graciela Guzman, Heather Brooks, Leah Murphy, Reed Adamson, Olivia Harper, Margaret Pierce

WALTZ CORPS Alexandra Grey, Isobel Stevens, April Kepner, Josephine Wilson, Stephanie Edwards, Sadie Harris, Megan Mostow, Sydney Heron, Graciela Guzman, Heather Brooks, Leah Murphy, Reed Adamson, Olivia Harper, Margaret Pierce

SPANISH CORPS Alexandra Grey, Sydney Heron, Olivia Harper

MARZIPAN CORPS Isobel Stevens, Megan Mostow, Heather Brooks

POLINCHINELLES PNB Students

ANGELS PNB Students

MOTHER GINGER Alex Karev

MOUSE KING Ben Warren

HARLEQUIN DOLL Alexandra Grey

COLOMBINE DOLL April Kepner

SOLDIER DOLL Lucy Fields

CANDY CANES PNB Students

MICE PNB Students

SOLDIERS PNB Students

She furrowed her brow; There were only a few solo roles and most of these were corps or childrens roles. She didn't see her name, or Derek's, or even any of the principals in fact, she turned around and headed into the studio, where they were to start rehearsals today. Webber and Bailey were there, with a few curious soloists and principals who were inquiring as to why they weren't listed as well. Meredith fell into the crowd next to Derek, crossing her arms. Not only was she curious as to where the other roles were, she wanted to know who she was in the ballet.

"I'm sure you're all anxious to know where the soloist and principal roles are; I wanted to do things differently this year. The corps have been posted and we're going to announce the rest of the roles right now. When your name is called, step towards the windows," Webber said in his loud, bellowing voice. Meredith looked at Derek, her eyes wide. For the first time since becoming a professional, she was anxious and nervous.

"Drosselmeyer will be played by Robert Stark, a guest artist from San Fransisco Ballet. He'll be joining us in a few days. Cristina Yang and Arizona Robbins will be soloists in Snow," he said, and Meredith watched Cristina make a face. She'd done the role last year as well and she knew she'd been hoping to get a bigger part.

"The Russian Lead will be Mark Sloan, with the Arabian male and female roles going to Preston Burke and Cristina Yang." At that Meredith squealed and clapped her hands; Cristina looked positively floored. The role required technical perfection with a huge range of flexibility and being able to anticipate the next move of your partner before they made any move at all. She knew her friend could dance the role well.

"Marzipan lead will be Arizona Robbins, with Dew Drop doing to Calliope Torres." The couple moved to the other side of the room, smiling happily. Both were solid soloist roles despite them being principals; with the amount of shows that there would be, everyone always ended up dancing corps roles anyway since everyone ended up injured.

"Snow Queen will be Theodora Altman," Webber announced, and Teddy smiled gratefully before heading to the other side of the room. That left Meredith, Amelia, Owen, and Derek. They all looked at each other, holding their breath. Meredith could feel Izzie's hard glare but focused her energy on Webber.

"The Cavalier will be danced by Owen Hunt, with Sugar Plum going to Amelia Shepherd." Amelia's eyes went wide, her mouth dropping open. Everyone knew she would get the role, but hearing it announced was entirely different. Meredith looked at Webber with wide eyes, knowing what this meant for her and Derek but hardly daring to believe it.

"This leaves Derek Shepherd as the Prince and Meredith Grey as Clara." Meredith knew the words were coming before they even left Webber's mouth but still her eyes watered. She had played Clara before but never professionally, just in ballet school. Meredith stepped to the other side of the room where Amelia enveloped her in a tight hug, the two girls silently celebrating their success. She could feel the icy stares from Izzie and her group but she didn't care. She was dancing Clara eight shows a week for six weeks.

* * *

Rehearsals started later that day without the PNB students; Meredith simply pantomimed where they would be and interacted with the adults during the party scene. She had her own little dances that she danced with the children, and it was slightly awkward doing everything without them, but she took it like a pro. They rehearsed the entire party scene, skipping the battle scene, and went on to Snow, with Meredith and Derek walking through the snowy forest having their Pas as Clara and the Prince. Derek exited the scene as Clara got caught up in the snowflakes, eventually dancing along with them before being transported to the land of sweets. Webber let them end rehearsal there for the day, and Meredith flopped to the floor, completely beat and exhausted. They still had to perform Giselle tonight; she and Amelia were switching off with Arizona and Erica as Giselle and tonight she was up. Downing some water she lay flat on her back, trying to catch her breath. She wished she could go home and rest but she had to rehearse all of Giselle for tonight, then get ready. She would sleep when she was dead, really.

* * *

After managing a half hour nap on the couch in her dressing room, Meredith started getting herself ready for Giselle. She completely redid her bun, smoothing it back with gel and hairspray, before changing into a pair of tights that were free of stains and holes, slipping into a nude camisole leotard for under her costume. The dresser came and helped her into her costume, fastening it at the back and doing her headpiece before she headed upstairs to the stage, sitting on the ground and putting on her pointe shoes. The ballet started in five minutes and she had to go on like she wasn't exhausted, like her calves weren't giving out on her, like her toes weren't bleeding everywhere.

Fortunately the show went without a hitch, and Meredith curtsied to a standing ovation, before running off the stage and down to her dressing room. Quickly she changed into her street clothes, before rushing to Derek's dressing room, flopping down onto the boys couch and laying her head back. She was half asleep by the time she felt him scoop her up and she started to giggle a little bit.

"Practicing for Nutcracker?" she teased, picking up her head as she lay in his arms, Derek taking her out to the car.

"Nutcracker, wedding, marriage, everything," he teased her, putting her on the ground so she could get in the car. A light rain was falling, making her hair frizz out but it no longer mattered.

"Mmm wedding you say?" she grinned, reaching up to kiss him, letting her fingers roam through his hair. It was close to midnight and she was wiped out but she didn't care.

"Mmm yes. I can picture it, something small with family and close friends, maybe on the land I own. And we'll build a house on the land someday for us and our kids," he told her with a wide smile. She couldn't help but close her eyes, getting lost in his words. She was 19 and she already had it all. Her dream profession, a perfect fiancée, her future set in stone.

"I love you," she laughed, kissing him again. He hoisted her into his arms and spun her around, her feet leaving the ground. "I never get tired of saying it," she smiled, tipping her head back. The rain was melting off her thick stage makeup but it was irrelevant at this point.

"So, when can it all start?" she grinned, her feet touching the ground again. Before coming to Seattle she had never wanted to think past ballet – it had been her entire world – but now that she had a future beyond the stage it was all she could think about.

* * *

Between Nutcracker rehearsals and headlining three different ballets eight times a week, Meredith was burnt out. She loved ballet so much, she loved dancing for PNB, and she didn't want it to become something she loathed. Some days she didn't' want to get up and come to class, and had to force herself into it because if she didn't, she didn't get paid, and if she didn't get paid, she wouldn't have money. She had a trust fund, but she didn't have a hold of it until she turned 21 or got married, whichever came first.

One day, as she sat listlessly against the wall of the studio, Derek, Mark, and Lexie approached her.

"Meredith, you need a fun intervention. You're tired and boring, you need to have fun," Lexie explained as Derek grabbed her arm, pulling her up. "Go to your dressing room and put your clothes on over your dance clothes," she said, Lexie pushing and pulling her along to her dressing room. She did as she was told, before they all pulled her down to the car.

"Where are you guys kidnapping me to?" she asked as she sat in the backseat with Lexie, looking out the window.

"Somewhere fun," Mark smirked, and Lexie rolled her eyes.

"Mark it was my idea, you don't get all the credit," she retorted and Mark just continued to smirk.

"Yeah but tonight you get extra brownie points for it!" he replied.

"Ew!" Mere exclaimed, pretending to gag. "That's my little sister, who is still under 18! While I gave you permission to date her I do not approve of you being porny in front of me," she declared, wrinkling her nose. Mark and Derek just laughed at the two sisters, and Meredith shook her head as the car pulled up at…a dance studio.

"Uh guys? Why are we at a dance studio? We just left one," she said, climbing out of the car. They were at Westlake Dance Center, which she'd heard of but never been to.

"This is our present to you, my friend," Mark grinned, hugging her sideways as they went inside. In the dressing room they stripped down to their leotards and tights, and Meredith slipped on her flat ballet slippers before following Lexie, Derek, and Mark into the dance studio.

"You still haven't told me what we're doing here, guys," she whined, as they walked into a studio full of adults in various stages of dance clothes, ranging from sweats to leotards and tights.

"We're taking a jazz funk class because **somebody** needs to loosen up." Meredith's eyes opened wide with horror. She had been dancing since she was three, seriously dancing since she was five, and professionally dancing since she was fifteen, and in all of those years she had never taken anything that wasn't ballet or contemporary.

"Guys, I really, really hate you and want to kill you all right now," she said as the teacher told them to scatter into lines. She stood next to Lexie with Mark and Derek behind them as they started an intense warm-up. Meredith felt so weird and uncomfortable doing everything turned-in, fast and intense, feeling like she couldn't keep up. She had never been in a dance environment where she felt like she couldn't keep up and constantly kept making faces at herself in the mirror. Lexie would look at her and giggle and she'd make a face back at her, hating every second of this.

During stretching, as she and Lexie helped each other stretch the other out, Lexie leaned over with some advice.

"I know you were groomed and raised to be a ballerina, but ballerina's get to have fun sometimes too. Literally just let it go. Be Elsa. Loosen up your muscles. Dance for yourself and no one else. It's just like ballet but a different style. Have fun," she said with a smile. At 17, Lexie was smart and definitely had more life experience than Meredith, who had lived her life inside a ballet bubble. Standing up, the girls joined Derek and Mark in a line to go across the floor. The combination was simple; Meredith knew all the steps, they just had a different name in jazz class, and she found herself starting to loosen up. She and Lexie paired up and when it was their turn, the sisters were in sync as they did the pas de bourre, glissade into a sideways saut de chat. All eyes were on Meredith as she leapt five feet off the floor, coming down into a triple pirouette and finishing the combination. The teacher and students looked impressed and Meredith looked around, blushing, acting like it was no big deal. Jumping and turning were her strengths, but she'd never really been in a non-competitive environment.

At the end of class, she thanked the teacher, knowing she'd come back one day if she needed to blow off steam. Letting go of her tight ballerina physique had felt great, even though they were just going back to PNB and another endless rehearsal for the show that night.

* * *

Somewhere along the way, Lexie and Mark had joined her family. Mark was considered Derek's brother from when they were kids, but she hadn't gotten to know him well until he started dating Lexie. She had let Lexie in, and with Lexie came back. The foursome tried to do everything together, and oftentimes Amelia and Owen joined them, and they became a dynamic group of six. Everyone envied them; they got the best parts, and since almost all of them were either blood or almost-marriage related, they became the family that Meredith ran to when she needed advice or help with anything. She had come to Seattle alone and scared, and a year later was surrounded by love.

* * *

 **This was a chapter where I just started writing and it never stopped. I could have gone on and on and on but felt it best to stop here, haha! Anyways, I have big plans for future chapters so please read and review! I'm not getting more than one review per chapter and it's highly disappointing, I feel like no one is reading so YOU tell ME what you would like to see more of and less of, please?**


	22. Arrival of Clara and the Nutcracker

Nutcracker rehearsals were going great. Izzie and co were forever jealous of Meredith and Amelia, but the two almost sisters rolled their eyes. Amelia had been in the company for years and her hard work was paying off as a principal now, and Meredith simply had natural talent that was working in her favor, which no one could deny. Lexie rounded out the threesome as Meredith's actual sister, deciding that she wanted no part in anything negative having to do with her sister and her almost-sister. The three girls did most things together in and out of the studio, which was good since Owen, Mark, and Derek were all close.

Opening night was nearing and rehearsals became more frequent and intense. In the span of a week, Meredith went through five pairs of pointe shoes as Clara, spending each night before bed sewing three new pairs of pointe shoes to last her every day, Derek snoring at her side. Nutcracker time was always exhausting; they were doing 8 shows a week and some of the roles didn't have understudies, especially the more prestigious roles. Meredith's understudy was Lexie, but she was determined not to hurt herself or at least dance through any pain she encountered.

* * *

Opening night was only a few hours ahead, and Meredith found herself in her dressing room, being fawned over by dressers and hair dressers alike. For the party scene she wore a rose colored, ruffled Victorian girls dress, a sash around her waist that was tied in a big bow in the back. The sleeves poufed at her shoulders and everything was trimmed in lace, included the bloomers she wore under the ruffled petticoats. Her pointe shoes weren't on so all that stuck out were her barefeet; her tights were rolled up slightly. She was doing her makeup as the hairdressers curled her blonde hair into tight ringlets, the rest of her hair pulled back half up half down. Amelia was getting similar treatment, getting helped into the Sugar Plum costume. Callie and Arizona were getting into their costumes for the Party scene, and Lexie was hovering in her Harlequin costume, watching Meredith and Amelia with joy. Meredith and Lexie's sister Molly was in the Party scene again, and she had also been promoted to being a Polinchinelle this year.

Derek walked in on the scene, watching Amelia being fussed over, and then he saw the fuss being made over Meredith and smiled. She had worked so hard to be in this company, to be promoted, to get the role of Clara. After a few minutes the curling irons were set down and her hair was hairsprayed seemingly forever, and once that was done a matching rose colored bow was tied into her hair. Then they were gone and Meredith was allowed to finish her makeup, pancaking her face and applying false eyelashes, an abundance of blush, and deep red lipstick. She looked like a porcelain doll, sitting at her mirror, before she turned around and smiled at Derek, who wasn't in his costume or makeup yet.

"So that was an experience," she smirked, with a small roll of her eyes, twirling around in her heavy velvet and satin costume. She looked perfect, all she needed was her pointe shoes, which he knew she didn't put on until she was upstairs by the rosin box. Next to them Amelia stood up in her bejeweled Sugar Plum, a tiara pinned into her hair and she leaned on Meredith, as Mere snaked an arm around her slim waist.

"We need photos for mom once you're in costume," Amelia declared, nodding over towards Lexie in her stiff Harlequin costume.

"And Mark and Owen too, she would want the six of us," she smiled. The six of them were officially now Shepherds, taken under the wing of Carolyn. She sent them package and encouragement, and Lexie had even been invited for Christmas despite her huge age gap with Mark. Meredith was thrilled to be spending the holiday with her little sister. Meredith hugged Amelia close, Derek choosing the moment to snap a picture of his fiancée and his sister sharing a moment together. It wasn't everyday there were two ballerinas at the same level of technical perfection who were best friends, let alone practically sisters. Meredith looked up at him for a moment and smiled, before she and Amelia both smiled widely, still hugging him. After a moment they beckoned for Lexie, and it was a sister sandwich, Meredith in the middle surrounded by tutu's. She wanted to seek out Maggie next for a picture of the four of them, but she knew the ultimate picture would include little twelve year old Molly. Over the past year, Meredith had become more accepting to the fact that she wasn't an only child, and had spent some time with Molly, but Lexie and Amelia were still her favorites, and Maggie she held at an arm's length.

* * *

Soon enough they were signaled that there was a half hours time until curtain, and Derek ran off to get into his costume. Mark and Owen came into the dressing room, Mark to see Lexie despite her dressing room being down the hall – she despised being in there with the girls who disliked Meredith and no one complained about her being in there with them – and Owen to see Amelia. Lexie was stressed because she had four roles.

"But Lex, that means Webber likes you and you might be up for promotion at the end of the year," Meredith reminded her, warming up at the barre that was installed along the wall by the bathroom, along with a mirror. She watched her form in the mirror making sure she was in alignment, her joints cracking with each move she made. With five minutes to go she ran upstairs with her pointe shoes, quickly putting them on and having a dip in the rosin box, coating her shoes with the sticky rocks. She stood in the wings with George, who had improved immensely in the past season, who was playing her brother Fritz, and slipped her hand into his and gave it a tight squeeze as the Overture began to play.

"Merde," she whispered to him, giving him a smiled, feeling a hand slide into her other and looking up at Derek. He wasn't in the ballet until the battle scene but he'd be watching from the wings. He swooped down and gave her a kiss careful not to smudge her lipstick.

"Merde, Mrs. Almost-Shepherd," he teased, moments before she skipped onto the stage, pantomiming peering into the keyhole of a door, trying to see into the heavily decorated living room, George running onstage soon after and beginning to torture her, tugging her away from the keyhole and all over the stage, the two of them swatting and playing with each other like children and siblings do.

The ballet took off from there, and soon Meredith was skipping off stage and doing a quick change into Clara's nightgown, a thin thing of white silk with a blue ribbon under a bust, a blue ribbon tied into her hair. The story went on with Clara running back on stage to retrieve her beloved Nutcracker doll from underneath the glittering Christmas tree, when suddenly from Drosselmeyers magic everything grew. The tree grew to several times it's size, startling Clara and she fainting on the chaise lounge. The soldiers and mice started an all out war, which woke Clara up from her fainting spell. And suddenly, the Nutcracker Prince defeated the Rat King, saving Clara and placing a jeweled tiara on her head (Meredith had to at least pretend to be serious as Derek slid the tiara into her hair; it was secured as they left the stage and the scene changed).

The scene changed to a forest, snow slowly falling down, as Derek led Meredith onto the stage, acting as if she was dumbstruck by the forest and the snow. They had a short Pas de Deux, before being surrounded by the snowflakes. They swirled in and out of Meredith and Derek, sometimes catching Clara and twirling her around, before the pair exited and let the dance commence. Meredith and Derek watched from the wings, Meredith proud of Lexie. At the end of the dance, Meredith and Derek entered again and are put in a sleigh headed for the land of sweets, and that was the end of the first act. The curtain closed and everyone rushed into the wings, Meredith flinging herself at Derek with a little shriek of joy. The first show was always the hardest; the were still working out spacial issues and any kinks in the movement, but everything was going smoothly so far.

* * *

The stage crew changed the scene while Meredith went downstairs to her dressing room to touch up her makeup. Maggie was already there, changed from her Snow costume into her pink poufy Waltz costume. Meredith raised an eyebrow and headed to her mirror, adding makeup where some had smudged, then spraying everything with a setting spray.

"Did you need something?" she said, turning around to face Maggie, straightening the silk nightgown she wore, adjusting her pointe shoe ribbons. Maggie shrugged her shoulders a bit.

"You're amazing out there. You're so confident with every step, you're so fearless. How do you do it? I feel like I'm a wreck, doubting every step, feeling like I'm going to fall flat on my face. I feel like I don't belong here." Meredith softened slightly. She knew how Maggie felt, she had once been that girl.

"Don't hold back. Dance every moment like it could be your last, because it might. Have fun but take it seriously. Your mother is Ellis Grey, you have her talent flowing through you," she said, a smile spreading across her face. Maggie was a great dancer; she was strong and good. She was only fifteen, younger than usual for being hired by the company, but it was because of her talent.

"No go back out there and be a Grey," Meredith commanded with a giggle, giving her sister a small hug before she left the room, getting ready for the second act.

* * *

The rest of the show went smoothly, and soon they were all taking their bows as usual. Meredith and Amelia each had a solo curtsy, as the two lead ballerinas, with standing ovations each before the curtain closed. The company crowded around the two girls in a jumbled circle, everyone clutching hands and yelling over the success of the first show, tutu's and pointe shoes colliding among the women.

Meredith, Amelia, and Lexie returned to their dressing room to wriggle out of their costumes; they and the boys were heading out to dinner. Thanksgiving had been the day before and the six of them had eaten take-out chinese and drank beer, relishing the single day off from dance.

After a few minutes, once they were all at least in their street clothes, there was a knock on the door. Lexie looked up and smiled.

"Hi, dad," she said, and Meredith whirled around. The last time she had seen her dad she was five years old, but here he was, standing in the doorway. She sucked in a deep breath and moved back towards her mirror, pretending to look for something in her bag. She had danced with her engagement ring pinned to the inside of both costumes and it had already been transferred back to her finger; her tiara was sitting in front of the mirror.

"Meredith," she heard her name, and she slowly turned, trying to keep her face passive.

"Thatcher," she said, lifting her chin with a small smile. He looked the same as she remembered him, almost 15 years ago. Amelia took the awkward moment to grab her things and flee from the awkward family reunion.

"You dance and look just like your mother," he said, and Meredith looked down at the ground, chewing on her lip. Everyone compared her to her mother and she hated it. She was striving as hard as she could to be herself in this competitive world, couldn't anyone give her some credit?

"Yeah, well. She dragged me everywhere with her and it's not like you tried to come get me," she said, somewhat harshly. She hadn't known where it came from but she knew she was bitter from the past fifteen years. "Did you even try?" She asked him, her fingers immediately going to her engagement ring. Thatcher noticed the ring and looked at her with surprise.

"You're getting married?" he asked her, and Meredith blushed. "I married your mother young. You were born when we were young. I think she regretted it." Her face flushed even more. She knew her mother had regretted having her. She looked over at Lexie, who seemed to have shrank against the wall.

"Yes, I am, and I already know she regretted it, she made that very clear my entire life that I was nothing but a bother to her," she said, crossing her arms and staring Thatcher down. It only mad him uncomfortable and both of them sighed.

"What do you want from me? I'm almost twenty, I know you're only back here for Lexie and I just happened to be in the room," she pointed out, reaching for her bag, leaving all of her dance things in the room. It wasn't necessary to bring them home, she'd just be back by noon.

"You're my daughter too, my oldest daughter. I want to know you, I want to be your father." Meredith snorted and rolled her eyes.

"If you wanted to know me and be my father you would've tried to get custody of me while I was being shipped back and forth from Paris to London, Thatcher. I was a kid and I didn't deserve anything," she spat out, the heat rising in her cheeks. Thatcher, to his credit, looking down at the ground, defeated.

"Meredith, I'm sorry. I tried. I tried really hard to get some sort of custody of you, and she beat me down. You know your mother, she's a force of nature. She blocked me at every point, and I don't even know why. You were in Paris and she was in London. Oh, I knew where you were, she was required to tell me where you were and what you were doing until you turned 18, I didn't know you were in Seattle until I saw you dancing last year but you didn't know about Lexie and Molly. She just wouldn't let me have you even though it would've been better for you." He sighed and swallowed a bit. "I want to get to know you, and whoever you're engaged to. You're my daughter too."

Meredith sighed. She didn't want to give in, but she had so many issues stemming from her father's abandonment, which it was turning out wasn't even really an abandonment, just her mother being a bitch.

"Ellis has Alzheimers," she said suddenly, tears springing to her eyes. "She lives at Roseridge and it's progressing rapidly," she said bitterly, wiping at her eyes before looking up at him again. "I'd like to get to know you but I can't just jump into it. And you can meet Derek, just not tonight, because tonight we're going out, with Lexie and Mark and Amelia and Owen, to celebrate our success and read reviews in the paper written about how amazing we all were tonight and how our stars are going up in the company and which one of us is going to be promoted at the end of the year and who's the favorite and all of that because it's what we do after opening night," she said with a small sigh, grabbing her coat off a hook on the wall. As she moved towards Thatcher she didn't know what to do, so she gave him a small hug before fleeing towards the principal men's dressing room and Derek's open and loving arms.

* * *

The group of six ended up at a diner they liked, packing themselves into a booth and literally ordering everything off the menu. After rehearsing all day and dancing all night, they were calorie-starved and Meredith just wanted to eat everything she could. Sitting between Derek and Amelia, and across from Lexie, she couldn't help but giggle.

"Lex, you're covered in that fake snow crap and a lot of glitter." Lexie started whining, searching her bun of the fake snow, trying to brush the glitter off her chest but it was stuck there until she showered, or worse, until Nutcracker was over. Amelia sucked on a margarita, shrugging her shoulders. She looked like a glitter bomb had burst all over her.

"Wear it with pride, we're all stuck with glitter or snow on us until New Years," she lamented, glitter shining in her dark brown hair. Meredith was lucky, she had been spared the glitter but some lingering snow was in her blonde ringlets.

The group stayed at the diner for a few hours, each couple leaving after the other, although Lexie and Mark ended up with Derek and Meredith. Mark and Lexie were slowly moving into their house; Derek and Meredith would eventually be building their own house and then Meredith's house would be theirs.

* * *

Meredith was off-the-walls happy with how her opening show as Clara had gone. Staying up late, the four huddled with blankets in the living room around their computers waiting for the first reviews to come up. When they finally did, they were all pleased with what was said, and even though she was in the corps, Lexie received a mention, called 'a very promising new member of the corps, sister to soloist Meredith Grey'. The two sisters beamed at each other, knowing that they were truly lucky to share something special together, something that had ended up bringing them together as both best friends and sisters.

After they read the reviews, both couples ended up climbing into bed, knowing that the next day, Saturday, included two shows and twice as many rehearsals as regular days. Before closing her eyes, Meredith snuggled up to Derek, laying her head on his chest.

* * *

 **Here's another one! To answer your questions, I'm not sure when their wedding will be, probably on their summer hiatus from the company, but for Christmas he's going to present her with blueprints to the dream house!** **She'll have time/start planning the wedding after Nutcracker.**

 **I promise more trips to the other dance studio as well, but not when Nutcracker is going because I know from experience that anything having not to do with Nutcracker is literally impossible! You live, breathe, and sleep nutcracker hahaha for six straight weeks and then you hate Nutcraker for the rest of your life (although I really want to be in a Nutcracker again and miss it so much! I remember all the dances still and did Snow for a friend last week).**


	23. A Pine Forest In Winter

Halfway through Nutcracker season, Meredith was beginning to feel that familiar burnout as she performed the same steps, night after night, to a different crowd. Night after night she performed to a full house, receiving standing ovations, a smile plastered on her face. She knew it wasn't just her; it was all of them, especially the corps girls who were doubling and tripling up on their roles because girls were dropping out due to injuries. She had a sprained left ankle and had twisted her right knee, but night after night she went on to a full house, entertaining thousands.

The week before Christmas Webber crowded the entire company into the bigger studio to make an announcement. They were all excited, since no one knew what this was about, and Meredith stood at the front, Derek hugging her from behind and her hand laced with Lexie's. Hopefully it was good news.

"I'm delighted to announce that American Ballet Theater wants to borrow a few of our best dancers for their last week of Nutcracker. If your name is called, you'll be headed to New York City in a few days to dance at the Metropolitan Opera House. Of course, after Christmas, you'll be dancing the last few shows of the season here," he said, before clearing his throat.

"Alexandra Grey, Meredith Grey, Owen Hunt, Amelia Shepherd, Derek Shepherd, Mark Sloan. Your presence has been requested by Kevin McKenzie, but I have no doubt that Elizabeth Shepherd had a hand in this."

Meredith looked down at the ragged toes of her pointe shoes and blushed, before they were dismissed before showtime. Of course Lizzie had wrangled this in their favor; she hadn't even met Lexie or Owen and they were coming along. Sighing, she made her way down to her dressing room to get ready for the show.

* * *

Two days later, the 21st, all six friends and lovers were on the plane, traveling first class to NYC. Meredith sat with Derek; Lexie and Mark were across the aisle, with Amelia and Owen behind Meredith and Derek. Lexie was excited, having never traveled for work before, but the rest of them weren't really phased; Meredith felt like she'd never stopped traveling for her love of ballet. Paris to London all the time, and now she was always skipping between Seattle and New York to be with Derek's family on holidays.

After a six hour flight, they landed at JFK and were whisked away to the Waldorf Astoria, everything being paid for by ABT. It was late in the day and tomorrow would be a day filled with possible new choreography. They would be doing the same roles as they had been doing in Seattle, except for Lexie – she was being promoted in several roles, and she was off the walls excited. The three girls were given one hotel room, as were the three boys, and the girls all pouted, rearranging themselves into the two rooms and even getting a third room. Then, they all fell into a dreamless sleep, waiting for the morning.

When the morning came, Meredith woke up and rolled over, waking up Derek.

"Deeeer," she whined, rubbing at her eyes. She had at least slept in until 8, which was 5 Seattle time. She had to get into a leotard and tights, do her hair, find a pair of pointe shoes that would last for today and tonight, and get to ABT. Finally she gave up and climbed out of bed, choosing a lavender colored leotard and black tights, pulling the tights on over her leotard, the color of her leotard not lost on her. Twisting her hair into a braided bun, she pinned back her bangs and sighed, pulling on a pair of yoga pants and a thick sweater. It was freezing outside, she could tell, her breath making frost on the window as she found a pair of thick socks, tucking her feet into her well-worn Uggs. Derek was just stretching as she laid on the bed, stretching her legs above her head

"Morning," he smiled, kissing her cheek as he got up, reaching for sweatpants, tights, and a white shirt, quickly changing before grabbing a hoodie and some shoes.

"Come on, let's find the others and grab something to eat before company class," he said, as Meredith grabbed her coat and scarf along with her dance bag, following him out of the room. Everyone was downstairs waiting for him and Meredith glowered, rolling her eyes slightly, before they all set off for the closest Starbucks. Meredith grabbed her usual, a skinny vanilla latte and a croissant, before they hailed two cabs towards ABT.

Once at the studios, Derek and Mark led the way – Meredith always forgot the pair spent their childhood training here – before a shriek came from one of the dressing rooms and Lizzie was upon the boys and Amelia. Meredith hung back with Owen and Lexie, before Lizzie noticed her.

"Meredith! I can't believe you're here! I mean I can, you were coming for Christmas anyway, but you're our Clara for a few shows! And is this your sister? You're Lexie, you're Marks girlfriend, oh we have plans for you, and you must be Owen," she grinned, saying all of this very fast, very loud, and very hyper. It was way too early for this. She grabbed Meredith, Lexie, and Amelia, and pushed them into a spare dressing room, before putting the guys in another, joining the girls after a few minutes.

"Oh, Derek and Mark used to dance here, they know their way around, Amelia only trained here, plus you guys are more fun," she grinned. She was a principal in the company and was giving up her role of Sugar Plum for a few nights for her youngest sister.

"And Meredith, your choreography is only being tweaked a bit, PNB and ours is mostly the same. But we have big plans for Lexie," she grinned, turning to the small brunette who was trying to blend in with the wall. "You'll be a soloist in Snow, and in Waltz, and you'll do Harlequin. We know you're Spanish as well but we don't want to overwhelm you since you're already learning new choreo." Lexie nodded with wide eyes, clearly terrified that she had to learn two new dances before their show tonight. Quickly the girls stripped down, layering on warmups, before grabbing their pointe shoes and scurrying to the studio for class. Meredith, who normally didn't get intimidated by other dancers, glanced around the room before stepping behind Lizzie, nerves creating butterflies in her stomach. Misty Copeland, Gillian Murphy, Maria Kotchetkova, Polina Seminova, basically all the women she looked up to and aspired to be were at the barre on the other side of the room and she was busy concentrating on not toppling over in her first position.

The pianist started playing and Meredith lost herself in barre, going through the movements of warming her body up, trying not to focus on the immense talent radiating towards her from across the room. After barre was center work, where Meredith and Lexie hid in the back, before the entire class went across the floor and they were unable to hide any longer. The sisters received nods of approval from the principals, which boosted Meredith's confidence, but she still felt somewhat shy.

After class was over, the women stretched and put on their pointe shoes before reconvening in the center of the studio with the men. Kevin McKenzie clapped his hands, bringing everyone to attention.

"I know it's new for everyone to bring guest artists in at the last minute and replacing some of your roles, but with the work of Elizabeth Shepherd it has been done. Until Christmas Eve, Clara will be played by Meredith Grey, the Nutcracker will be played by Derek Shepherd, Sugar Plum will be played by Amelia Shepherd, the Cavalier will be played by Owen Hunt, the Arabian Male will be played by Mark Sloan, and Alexandra Grey will take over as both a Snow soloist and a Waltz soloist." The company politely clapped as the six lined up at the front; Meredith was blushing deeply but held her head up.

* * *

Soon enough they were deep in rehearsal, Meredith being carefully guided with some slightly different choreography. Everything went smoothly up until Snow, where they worked with Lexie on her new role. She danced it with Glee, loving the choreography and her part. Breaking for lunch, Meredith, Lexie, Amelia, and Lizzie ran giggling to their dressing room, slipping their pointe shoed feet into Uggs before grabbing their coats and dashing outside to grab lunch.

Once they were back, they entered the studio again, and rehearsal went on until 4 PM. The show was at 8, and they all still needed costumes sorted out. Meredith was more petite than their current Clara was, and ended up in a royal blue satin dress with white ruffles and lace that fit perfectly, and she couldn't stop twirling around. Like at PNB, the hair dressers came and curled every inch of her hair, tying in the bow, allowing her time to do her makeup. The rest of the PNB crew were fit into costumes, and soon it was time to take the stage.

"Merde!" Lizzie grinned, squeezing Meredith's hand and she giggled, squeezing her sister's hand back. Lizzie had been put in the role of Arabian female; she and Mark were partnering for these few shows. The overture started and Meredith took a deep breath, testing out the strength of her new pointe shoes, feeling a touch on her shoulder. She turned and her eyes widened; it was Misty Copeland.

"You'll be amazing, I've seen some of your work with PNB." Meredith managed a dazed smile before turning and skipping on stage to the music, and the show flew by from there.

* * *

After a string of four shows, it was Christmas Eve and the guests, along with the rest of ABT, were taking their bows. Meredith was exhausted and couldn't wait to get to the Shepherd house and relax for a day or two before rushing back to Seattle and doing the rest of their shows until New Years. Peeling off her Clara dress and tiara, they all helped each other out of their costumes and out of now-dead pointe shoes and into comfy sweats, packing up their theater cases and loading everything into Lizzie's car and the car that Derek had rented. Guesting with ABT had been a dream, but Meredith was tired.

The Shepherd house wasn't far from the city, but Meredith quickly fell asleep in the backseat with Lexie. It was late at night, she was sore, and the gentle rocking of the car lulled her to sleep. Carolyn had been at every show, but had made it home before they did. Kathleen and Nancy would be arriving Christmas morning.

Once the car stopped, Meredith woke up and climbed out of the car, looking up at the familiar Shepherd house and smiling. Lexie climbed out on the other side, wordlessly moving over to Meredith and slipping her arm through hers.

"Don't worry Lex, Carolyn is amazing and she'll love you. She's pleased her boys found sisters," she smiled, tugging her gently towards the front door as the boys grabbed their bags and dragged them towards the house. Lizzie pulled up next to their car, Amelia and Owen in tow as Meredith and Lexie stepped in the house. It smelled delicious, like pine trees and Christmas cookies, and Meredith grinned. Carolyn appeared from the kitchen with a smile.

"Meredith! It's so lovely to finally see you again and not just from the stage," she smiled, pulling the young girl into her arms. "And you must be Meredith's sister Lexie, it's so nice to meet you finally!" she said, pulling Lexie in with Meredith. The two girls smiled up at her before looking at each other. They were more than ready to have a relaxing Christmas with their new family.

* * *

 **Soooo new chapter! I felt something like this could be fun and extend their Christmas fun in New York, since they basically only have one day off for Christmas! Plus dancers do guest spots all the time in other dance companies (they don't really do it on such a grand scale but since I have Derek's sister in the company she can have some pull :P). Anyway, hope you like the chapter!**


	24. Loops and Verses

Christmas with the Shepherds had been unfortunately brief; all the dancers from PNB found themselves on a red-eye back to Seattle on Christmas night, with Nancy rushing back to San Fransisco and Kathleen hurrying back to London as well. Meredith curled up next to Derek and slept the 8 hour flight. When the plane landed early in the morning and the crew crawled off they plane, they headed home for a few precious hours of sleep before company class, rehearsal, and a show tonight.

Meredith wanted to collapse, but they had five more shows left until they had a month off. The finish line was there, it was in sight, they just had to cross it.

For the next five days, the company simply moved through the motions of the ballet, drained robots who wanted the Nutcracker to die. But as Meredith took her final bow next to Amelia on New Years Eve, she knew she would miss the dance and eventually would get excited again about what role she would land in the next year.

Once again, the company threw a New Years party for their dancers, and Meredith, Amelia, and Lexie had fun getting ready together in Meredith's bedroom, shutting the three guys out until they were ready. The room was a mess, with gowns, shoes, and makeup scattered everywhere as they tried on everything, trying to decide on something. Meredith finally settled on a blush, embroidered and beaded evening gown, her hair swept up in curls, collarbones dusted with bronzer, her feet in a pair of gold stilettos. Amelia opted for a dramatic, navy strapless dress, her hair also up in curls, while Lexie borrowed a simple red strapless gown, leaving her hair down. Once they were ready they headed downstairs, letting Mark, Owen, and Derek drool over them, before they left for the hotel where the party was at.

Meredith and Lexie stuck together, until Meredith was pulled away by Webber to be shown off to sponsers, as one of the most promising and talented company members. To her chagrin, they kept asking about her mother and she had to put on a smile and lie through her teeth, but it worked.

The night was fun, everyone was drinking and the company members finally had no responsibilities for the next month. There was dancing and Meredith even let Maggie into their little family, introducing her as her other sister. At midnight, the room erupted into screams as Derek's lips locked with hers, entering into 2018 with the people who had quickly become her family in the studio and out.

* * *

Meredith woke up on New Years Day with a hangover, and as she was groaning into her pillow, she was glad for the rainy day outside. It seemed like only seconds passed when Derek came into the room, carrying her a tray with breakfast, advil, and a long plastic tube. She perked up at the breakfast with a smile and started eating the fluffy pancakes smothered in syrup, before noticing the plastic tube.

"What's that?" she asked him, nodding towards it. He climbed onto the bed with a huge grin, opening it and pulling out the papers. It was a set of blue prints.

"This is our house," he grinned excitedly, and her eyes widened. "I wanted to save it for when we were alone together and not crowded by all my sisters. But here, this would be our bedroom on the first floor, at the back of our house. The kitchen and living room and dining room are all open, but we can change that if you want. And then there's the upstairs, for the kids bedrooms and guest bedrooms, and I put in a bathroom in the master room, and another one downstairs, and then a few upstairs," he paused, gazing at her for a moment. She had a smile on her face and had set the tray aside to pour over the blueprints with him.

"I think we should add a playroom downstairs for the kids," she said with a shy smile, pointing to an area next to the living room where there was nothing yet. "They can't have their toys in the living room around all of our things. And we should have a studio in the house because that would be fun, we could rehearse and keep in shape even more, and start the kids early," she smiled, her eyes shining as they looked over the plans together. He leaned over and kissed her on the lips and she giggled.

"Speaking of plans…I want to get married this year," she said softly, tucking her hair behind her ears. He raised a brow and smiled at her.

"Really? You don't want to wait until you're 21?" he asked, kissing her forehead. She shook her head gently.

"No, I don't care about age, all I care about is you," she insisted. "I want it to be in August, so after my birthday but before we return to the company, but before the tour," she said gently, closing her eyes. She hadn't really started to think about all the details yet, but she knew with Lexie and Amelia's help, everything would get done. She would even include Maggie, maybe. Maggie had to be in the wedding, she was one of Meredith's sisters.

"Then our wedding is in August. I'll leave everything to you and the girls and I'll just turn up wearing whatever you put me in and I'll remember your name," he teased her with a laugh.

* * *

January was fun; the six of them living in Meredith's house ended up staying at the house most of the time, lazy as hell. They knew they should be taking class at other studios and staying in shape but none of them really had the will to get up except to order more chinese and pizza. Maggie came by from time to time to remind them that yes, there was a life outside their front door, but most of the time they got drunk and told stories about when they were younger. Meredith won points here for training in Paris and London.

When February rolled around, they found themselves carpooling between cars to PNB, arriving early and groaning in their dressing rooms as they got ready for class. Lexie had moved into Meredith and Amelia's dressing room, having grown tired of the hazing in the one she shared with Izzie and co, and the three sisters got ready, piling on the warm ups in the freezing studios, before rushing to take their places at the barre – Meredith in front of Derek, Lexie in front of Meredith, Mark in front of Lexie, and Amelia in front of Lexie, with Owen in front of Ameilia. Everyone in the studio either hated the six of them or wanted to be them, or if they were mature enough they were friends with them because they were past the point of competition and just wanted to dance.

Meredith was stunned after class when she strolled by the casting board. Cinderella, Jewels again, as per usual, Don Quixote, The Firebird, and Onegin. Everything except Jewels was double-cast. She and Amelia were both the lead in Cinderella, she was the lead in Diamonds while Amelia was the lead in Emeralds – Cristina had received the lead in Rubies. For Cinderella she and Amelia were splitting Cinderella, as well as for Firebird. Meredith was cast as Kitri in Don Q which excited her beyond belief; she had done the Fan dance for Youth America Grand Prix when she was 12 and had won top prize. As her eyes wandered over the list for Onegin, she let out a gasp. She was cast as Tatiana, with Lexie as Olga. They were dancing sisters! Amelia had a smaller part but knowing Amelia, she would be glad she wasn't in so many ballets.

Turning around she found Derek, knowing he was her partner in all of these. There was a wide smile on he face as she skipped over to him, her pointe shoes loud on the thing carpet.

"Mmm if I didn't know any better I'd think someone might be on her way to becoming a principal ballerina in June," he grinned, wrapping his arms around her lithe frame. She was tiny in his strong arms and he held her close, celebrating her success. Or their success, really. Every time Meredith's star rose, Derek's star rose with it as he was her partner. He had never been in it for the fame, though, he did it for the love of dance. He knew that's why Meredith danced as well; she was simply blessed with the natural talent she inherited from her mother. With Derek, his four sisters danced and he simply fell into it as well.

After a kissing session in the hallway, they entered the studio again and Meredith slipped over to Amelia with a grin.

"Congratulations, Miss Shepherd," she smirked, sliding an arm through hers. "I can't believe they double casted and we both got it," she said under her breath, hardly daring to believe it was all true. These were her dream roles; she knew Webber had wanted to prep her for being a principal but the man was literally grooming her, giving her the best roles. She was 19 and flying high, nothing could stop her from where she was.

Lexie ran into the studio next, her eyes wide as she ran over to Meredith and Amelia.

"Is the casting right? Did I really get cast in a soloist role!?" she said excitedly. Sure she'd had soloist parts in Nutcracker, but the bigger ballets were more important. Meredith laughed and hugged her close.

"Yes, you're playing my sister!" she grinned, just as Webber strode into the studio with his imposing presence. The guys joined the three sisters at the barre, as Richard cleared his throat; the studio quickly quieted down.

"I assume all of you have seen the casting lists; take note that the lead roles are double cast so that we can show off the immense talent we have here at Pacific Northwest. My main announcement today, however, is about The Firebird. We're going to do something that only ABT has done; because our two lovely leading ladies need to showcase just how talented they are," he said, causing Amelia and Meredith to exchange a glance.

"Miss Grey and Miss Shepherd will each have their own choreography as The Firebird, it will be unique and show off their talents and strong points as dancers. Today, however, we'll be beginning with the first scene of Cinderella, you all have five minutes before we start to get ready." Amelia poked Meredith in the ribs and she giggled, turning towards her.

"So we get different choreo? I remember Lizzie telling me when they did that, it was pretty awesome. It was a big hit, and we're going to be awesome," she laughed, bumping her hip against Meredith's bony one, as Mere reached down to get some water and tuck a pin back into her bun. She giggled as she stood up, straightening her purple leotard, before charging into the center of the room.

"Come on, Cinderella!" she laughed, before turning and around and curtsying to her.

"Oh, after you Cinderella," Amelia teased back, grabbing Meredith's hand and letting her do a few pirouettes as they partnered for a moment.

* * *

They learned and rehearsed the entire first scene that day, and once they were back in their dressing room, Meredith fell to the floor, pulling off her pointe shoes. Inside were spots of blood, with her feet freely bleeding and she grimaced, reaching for her theater case which had plenty of band aids, gauze, and tape just for this. Lexie and Amelia were in the same way.

"It's a wonder I'm getting married when he sees my feet like this at night," she smirked, after bandaging her toes up and wiggling them towards the middle of the room, before putting a pair of clean socks over them. Amelia rolled her eyes a bit.

"Please, Nancy is thirty five, he's been seeing her disgusting feet for years," she laughed, shrugging her shoulders as she changed into sweats, not even caring at this point. Meredith pulled a sweater over her head and buttoned her jeans, shoving her feet into boots and gathering her things.

"I know it's late but I want to talk to you guys about things," she smiled, leaving the room and heading out to the car where Derek was waiting, Lexie rushing out after her.

* * *

Once the six of them were home, Meredith and Derek sat them down in the living room, standing in front of the couch.

"What are we doing?" Mark whined, his arm around Lexie. "I want to sleep, we all have to be up in the morning."

"Shut up Mark," Derek smirked, with Meredith rolling her eyes.

"We gathered you guys to tell you that we settled on a wedding date," she said with a smile, as Lexie and Amelia lit up. "We're getting married August 4th, right before we go to Europe for tour. And it's going to be here in Seattle, and Lex and Amelia, you guys are my maid's of honor," she grinned, as they rushed at her squealing. The three girls started gabbing about details as Derek sat down on the couch next to Mark, shaking his head a bit as he watched the three sisters – it didn't matter that Lexie and Amelia weren't related, the three of them did everything together and to them, they were sisters.

"So," Derek said, turning to Owen and Mark. "Do you guys feel like being my best men? I can't promise the girls won't put you in something ridiculous but there will be alcohol, and family, and fun, and the entire company knowing those three, and it's going to be spectacular," he smiled, glancing at Meredith. The look on her face was something he wanted to capture, to frame and put on the fireplace mantel in the house they were going to build, something he wanted to show their kids when everyone was older, to tell them how happy Meredith had been, caught up in the moment.

"We literally just decided this morning on the wedding and everything so nothing is planned, and I have other people to ask to be in the wedding, I want Maggie and Cristina, and I want Molly because she's my sister too, and I have three other crazy sisters to call up and ask because they'd kill me, and this is going to be crazy and huge and ridiculous, and oh my god we need to go dress shopping next weekend, but it's going to be amazing, and I'm going to be Meredith Shepherd," she grinned, locking eyes with Derek for a moment before Amelia pinched her.

"Finally! You're going to be a Shepherd sister for real!" she laughed.

"No fair! Grey's are better," Lexie protested, wrinkling her nose. Mark's eyes twinkled as he looked at her; she was only 17 but he was definitely thinking about the future. After all, he was already 27 and he loved her.

"Hey hey, I'm staying Grey for my career, but legally I'll be Shepherd. Are my sisters happy?" she laughed. Derek left the room and came back with champagne for everyone, and despite their best efforts, they were up late into the night, talking about the wedding that was coming up in eight months.

* * *

 **Finally churned out another chapter! I fell tonight and sprained my left arm but what was amusing is I'm pre-med and diagnosed it before the freaking ER did! Anyway. Hope you guys like this! My crazy life is finally settling down a bit even though I still have class and rehearsal 6 days a week! If you want I can post pics and vids in my profile Read and review!**


	25. Diamonds

For all of February, it seemed like they had endless rehearsals. They would finish a scene of one ballet, and move directly into the next ballet with only a small break inbetween. Meredith was worn out and tired, but when was she not? She was leading the whole company in most of the ballets which was stressful enough without having to learn five different ballets and show herself off to her greatest abilities. Jewels she had nailed down in one rehearsal; it was a small, half hour ballet where she and Derek were the lead, and it was just one part of a bigger ballet. Everything else was more complex, with multiple costume changes and more intense Pas'.

Onegin was the ballet for premiere night, a Tuesday in early March, and she found herself in her dressing room in a long white regency-era type gown. Lexie was across the room finishing her makeup, dressed in a costume identical to Meredith's. Meredith was nervous; both of her parents were out in the audience tonight. It had been decided by Roseridge that Ellis would come to her performances, to see what they did to her memory, and Thatcher was there for Lexie, and now Meredith as well. With five minutes to curtain, the girls ran up into the wings, putting on their pointe shoes and holding hands as they waited for the curtain to go up. Lexie was first on the stage, planning Tatiana (Meredith's) birthday party, when the corps entered and there was a dance, Lexie the center of attention. Mark's character entered and they had a pas, before Meredith entered as did Derek, with Tatiana falling in love with Onegin. The ballet continued for two more acts, the ending dramatic with Tatiana ordering Onegin out of her life.

The company took their bows, with Lexie and Meredith holding hands and curtsying to thunderous applause as the two sisters squeezed hands beside Mark and Derek. The curtain came down and the four of them embraced in a hug, the girls stepping on the guy's feet in their now-dead poiinte shoes, laughing happily. The stage hands were clearing the set from the stage and the four of them headed to their dressing rooms, Meredith and Lexie peeling off as they reached theirs. Amelia, who wasn't in the ballet, had made her way backstage to see her sisters.

"Guys, that was amazing! Lexie you were so beautiful dancing with Mark, your chemistry is seriously almost as great as Meredith and Derek," she grinned, her brown hair hanging past her shoulders for a change, her blue eyes shining. There was a knock in the doorway and Meredith looked with a smile; it was Thatcher with two bouquets of roses for Lexie and Meredith.

"You girls were beautiful out there tonight," he said, pulling Lexie into a tight hug. Meredith let him hug her as well and for a moment, the daddy issues and abandonment issues melted away. She had a dad, they were working on their relationship, and she smiled as she hugged him back. Amelia snapped a photo of the three Grey's before Thatcher kissed Lexie on the cheek, giving Meredith another hug.

"I'll see you girls tomorrow, Susan and Molly are coming with me the rest of the week, Molly basically demanded to see you guys and how could I say no? She might be part of the company soon." Meredith couldn't help but smile; she had gone from a hyper ten year old to a slightly more mature almost-13 year old brooding teenager who took ballet very seriously, wanting to be just like Lexie and Meredith. The girls said goodbye to Thatcher and quickly worked on getting ready to go home; they didn't bother taking off the makeup. Instead Meredith pulled a dress over her head with black tights, knowing they were going out to dinner, grabbing her coat and bag and heading to the guys dressing room. Luckily they were ready to go, and the group of six headed out to the two cars and out to the restaurant.

* * *

The next morning, class hit them all hard after dancing a full ballet the night before. The only two who weren't dying were Owen and Amelia, who kept making faces in the mirror, until Meredith managed to kick her in the back of the head during a grande battement.

"Totally not apologizing for that one," she said stubbornly, pivoting on her pointe shoe so she could repeat the exercise on the other side. Lexie snickered, remembering the time Meredith 'accidentally' kicked her in the head. Amelia scowled and grabbed her sweatshirt, balling it up and throwing it at Derek down the line.

"Derbear, your fiancée kicked me in the head!" He started laughing and shook his head.

"Good, cause if I did it mom would yell at her 20 something year old kids. This way, Meredith is off the hook." Meredith turned her head and smirked, beating her foot in petit battement, before springing up in a passé and balancing perfectly on the box of her pointe shoe, before plieing gracefully as the music ended.

Amelia was still glaring at her an hour later as they rehearsed Jewels; fortunately she was in Emeralds which came first, and Meredith was in Diamonds which came last. They had a whole 35 minutes during Rubies in which to bicker like siblings. Standing at the barre, she stretched out her long legs as she and Derek talked.

"Why did you kick her?" he smirked, pretending to stretch as well. Peeking up from under her bangs she giggled a bit.

"Because starting my morning with Amelia gloating is…not how I enjoy starting my mornings," she smirked back, leaning in and giving him a discreet kiss. She knew Webber was always watching his dancers, especially them, but she didn't really care. She watched them rehearse Emeralds with owen, working through her stretches, before watching Cristina and her corps dance through Rubies. She was paired up with Burke, and although Cristina never told her, she knew they were sleeping together. The two girls had grown apart over the past few months, but Meredith still knew things.

Amelia came to stand next to Meredith, pestering her with why she was mad and her and finally, Meredith rolled her eyes and turned towards her.

"I'm not mad at you, I just don't appreciate you gloating that you had a night off because you're a principal and can afford it," she said simply, before she and Derek were called for Diamonds. It started off with the corps and soloists; Lexie and Izzie were the soloists, and they danced for awhile before it was her and Derek's turn for their Pas. She loved this dance, with it's heavy Russian Vaganova style that was different from what she had been trained in, but now danced exclusively in. He lifted her into the air one last time and she came down gently, posing before running offstage, the demi-soloists running on, who consisted of April, Jo, Sadie, and Leah. She watched them from the sidelines before it was her time to dance again, then breathlessly run off. The entire dance was 31 minutes, and she was exhausted by the end, but pleased with her performance. Bailey gave them pointers as she and Derek worked on things in the corner, the rest of the cast working on other things. Finally they were let go, told to be back at 5:30 for the 8pm show.

* * *

Lexie, Amelia, and Meredith left to get food to bring back for them and the guys, running across the street and grabbing chinese before coming back, sitting on the floor of their dressing room in sweats with piles of food around them. They needed major carbs since they were about to burn everything off, knowing they were just going to eat more after the show to compensate for everything they burned off, aka the Chinese food. With over an hour to go, each girl started on her make up, an extensive process that each individual had down to a specific science. The dressers came and helped them into their tutu's; Amelia's was gorgeous green velvet and tulle, hitting below the knee, while Meredith and Lexie had slightly different variations of pure white satin and tulle, their tutu's extending straight out at the waist. The two girls had different tiara's; Lexie's was smaller white rhinestones, while Meredith's was heavier, more ornate, protruding from the top of her head, letting everyone know that it was her dance, she was the lead. She looked at herself in the mirror with a smile; as a child she had watched her mother perform this dance, and now she was following in her footsteps. She was even wearing the same costume; the tape on the tag inside faintly said 'Ellis', despite all these years later.

Watching Emeralds and Rubies from the wings, Meredith smiled at her friends and how much everyone had grown since she'd joined the company nearly two years ago. There was a 15 minute intermission before Diamonds was on, and even then there was 7 minutes before her and Derek made their entrance. She felt like she was floating as she did waltz turn after waltz turn, before being lifted high above the stage in Derek's arms, every moment with him sensual and loving. Whoever said ballet wasn't about love needed to be slapped.

Once Diamonds was over, all three ballets took their bows, and Meredith found herself backstage in a flurry of green, red, and white, men and women, as the crowd surged towards their dressing rooms. Meredith didn't want to take off her costume, even though she knew she'd be wearing it once or twice a week. After being helped out of her tutu and tiara, she stripped off her leotard and tights and pulled on leggings and a shirt, basking in the loose, comfortable clothing and laying on the couch, waiting for Derek to come to her. Amelia sat on her feet with a giggle, poking her sore calves.

"Whaaaaat Mia?" she whined, opening her eyes for a moment.

"We should start planning your wedding tonight, when the guys start drinking," she said with a grin. A smile started spreading across Meredith's face as she struggled into a sitting position.

"I…really really like that idea," she giggled. She wanted to look at wedding dresses badly, but her only free day's were Mondays, and she made a mental note to call area shops and make bridal appointments for any Monday's she could. She was eager to get everything started for their August wedding.

BREAK

Once the six got home, the men all grabbed a beer and sat in the living room, while the girls went upstairs and convened on Meredith and Derek's bed, with all three of them having their computers out and typing furiously.

"Do you know where you want to have it?" Amelia asked her, and Meredith bit her lip.

"We have to get married in a church, I feel like your mother would kill me if we didn't get married in a church," she admitted with a wrinkle of her nose. Amelia laughed and rolled her eyes.

"She totally would, Nancy and Kate managed to find churches that pleased Mom, now it's your turn," she giggled, shrugging her shoulders. "There's St. James Cathedral, we've been past it before, it's absolutely gorgeous."

"I'll drag Derek there Monday and we can take a look, and god, venues. And gowns. And bridesmaid gowns. I need Kate here from London," she pouted, her ash blonde hair falling in her face, still wet from the shower as she pulled a PNB shirt on over her tank top.

"Glad I could help," Amelia preened, earning another kick from Meredith, who smiled innocently.

"I'm so glad I have a big sister I can push around," she smirked, before leaning for Lexie and pulling her towards her. "But no one touches Lexie because she's my little sister. Except Mark. But then I don't want to know what goes on with that," she giggled, kissing Lexie's cheek and patting her on the head.

"Oh thanks Mere, the whole house knows what you and Derek do!" she complained, smacking her arm and Meredith laughed.

"Yeah but it's our house," she countered, rolling her eyes. "Don't worry, we'll have our own in the middle of the woods come summer," she laughed, lounging back into the pillows. She loved alone time with Amelia and Lexie, but she wished Nancy, Kathleen, and Lizzie could always be with them; instead they were all over the world happily living their own dreams. She was happy right where she was, dancing every night with the people she called family, working her way to the top with hard work and perseverance, hoping for a promotion in June.

* * *

 **Have another update guys! Now each update will be filled with ballet AND wedding planning, which is going to be so much fun to write and I can't wait!**

 **For those wondering, I AM both a dance and pre-med major! I haven't started my pre-med classes yet, and at some point I will probably have to choose between the two. For dance I want to go into a field called Dance Therapy, it's along the lines of occupational therapy and is INSANELY rewarding, but so is surgery! If I can do both it would be FANTASTIC. But I'll probably have to choose**

 **Anyway, I hope you liked this! If there's anything you'd like to happen, let me know and I'll make it happen! I love you guys!**

 **Also: 25 chapters guys!**


	26. One Shot Note

So spring break starts in an hour (I'm sidelined in rehearsals because diabetes sucks!) and I plan on updating ALL stories multiple times during the week! But I posted a one-shot song fic and I plan on writing a bunch more during break! Look out for them all, follow my user name so you don't miss anything, I don't want you to miss anything exciting! I wrote the fic (It's titled All Too Well) last night before bed and I'm actually INCREDIBLY proud of it! Lots of the one-shots are going to be based off of Taylor Swift songs but some might not be You never know until you read them! I'm very excited about the things I have planned for my writing and you guys should too!

Also, I made a Grey's twitter and you can follow it at merderloving! I post lots of pictures and tweet a lot if you're interested and I follow back! You can meet your writer ;) Let me know who you are if you decide to follow me!


	27. Adagio di molto

Halfway through the season, Webber decided to change the repitoire of the company, and it threw everyone into a frenzy, having them learn new choreography while they were still performing their current rep. They were now dancing Dances at a Gathering, La Esmerelda, The Four Seasons, Gayane, and La Sylphide. In La Sylphide, she was shocked that she had landed the role of the Sylph. In Gayane, she and Derek were the leads, which excited her because she had been obsessed with the pure Russian ballet since she had been a little girl, losing herself in the harsh Communist-era music. In Esmerelda, she had been cast as Esmerelda, with Amelia as Fleur De Lys and Derek and Owen as their counterparts. In Four Seasons, she and Derek were dancing winter, while Amelia had been chosen for autumn with Owen, and Lexie and Mark were dancing summer. For Dances at a Gathering, it was only the Soloists and Principals.

Throwing herself into the new choreography, Meredith found she had little time for anything else. She lived, breathed, and sweat ballet. She went through two pairs of pointe shoes a day, and in breaks between scenes she wasn't in, she was furiously sewing new pairs and breaking them in, glad that the company paid for her shoes now that she had a contract. It was stressful and she was upset she had little time to plan the wedding, but she did that when she wasn't rehearsing, sitting in a corner of the studio with Amelia and Lexie if they had the chance, ticking things off her list on The Knot. Then she would get off and dance harder than ever before, before resting for a few hours in her dressing room and getting ready for the show that night.

* * *

Their last show before they switched to the new ballets was Don Quixotie, and she carefully did her makeup in a different way to match the character. She winged her eyeliner and put on a different, more dramatic red lipstick, tucking a rose into her bun as she was helped into an intricate red and black costume. The leotard part was black, adorned with red ruffles and trim, and the skirt was dramatic with plenty of ruffles with gold and black accents. Her pointe shoes were perfectly broken in; her 10th pair this week, and at her shoulders were red and black poofs. She took a breath as she stood in front of the mirror; she had danced this role many times in the past two months, but it held such sentimental value to her. It had won her an international title in the Youth America Grand Prix at the ripe old age of 12. Everyone had called her a child prodigy, as the child of Ellis Grey, and she couldn't help but twirl around in front of her mirror, admiring the way the costume moved with her body when she heard someone clearing their throat in the doorway. She jumped slightly and turned when she saw it was Webber.

"H-Hi Master Webber," she stammered with a smile, pulling herself up.

"I coached you in Kitri when you were eleven and twelve at the Royal. I coached you to perfection, I coached you to win for the Royal, and you won. I've watched you perform Kitri several times a week and it brings me back to tiny little twelve year old you. A force of nature, someone to be reckoned with. And you still are that girl, a force to be reckoned with, a force of nature. Everything I throw at you, you attack, you take on, you show that you can do with ease and perfection. You're the pride of the company at nearly 20 years old. You're better than your mother was, Meredith, and I've known your mother since she was five years old and took her first class with me here at Pacific Northwest. You're a prodigy and one day, you'll be the youngest prima," he told her. Meredith ducked her head and smiled bashfully, biting her lip.

"Thank you, sir, it means a lot to me, how much you believe in me. You trained me to be extraordinary, you and my mother, and I haven't wanted to let anyone down. It's not in my personality. I'm a perfectionist, you see?" she giggled slightly. He smiled warmly.

"I can tell, but it's a good thing in ballet. Your perfectionism is going to pay off someday soon," he told her, before walking away. Her heart thudded wildly in her chest as she reached for her pointe shoes; Amelia, Lexie, Arizona, and Callie were already by the stage, ready for the ballet. Her hands felt clammed as she found her toe pads, her toes already taped up the way she liked them, heading upstairs, putting on her shoes the same ritualistic way she had been for years, and jumping up and down in the wings to keep herself warm as she waited in the wings for her entrance.

* * *

After the show she was breathless, but Webber drew her into the lobby to meet patrons and sponsors. She always dreaded this, being tugged around as a protégé to meet the wealthy people who donated to the company, being shown off as a company member. She wasn't alone, Amelia was there too along with Arizona, but she was the only one with Webber. She stood by his side as he listed off her accomplishments and just how young she was at 19 as a soloist, and how talented she was and who her mother was, and Meredith stood by his side smiling gracefully, occasionally throwing in a few words. Everyone was all over her; she was their favorite, apparently, and a few had been following her since she'd won first place at YAGP. Once the crowd thinned out a bit, she realized that her mother was there and her heart stopped. Her mother had watched her dance tonight, likely not even knowing who she had been watching, Webber guided her over to Ellis and as they drew closer, Ellis became more animated.

"Richard Webber, I haven't seen you in years, how are you?" she gushed, and Meredith knew at once she wasn't lucid. She deflated slightly, glad she didn't have to face the beast that was actual Ellis. She turned to Meredith with a sweet smile.

"And you, you remind me of me out there, but better. You can't be much older than seventeen or eighteen but you're a soloist. You're amazing, you fly across the stage. No wonder Richard has big plans for you, I can see it already," she smiled warmly, and Meredith cracked a small smile. "What's your name?"

"Meredith," she forced out, trying not to cry. In an ideal world, her mother would be watching her dance, praising her for becoming extraordinary dancer that she had told her over and over that she could never be, despite her exceptional training and sheer determination.

"I have a daughter named Meredith," Ellis said, lighting up. "She's twelve, she lives in Paris and studies ballet there. I have no idea what to do with her, I might force her back to London with me if she wants to get anywhere in this world, she's so unfocused. The talent is naturally there, she's won awards, sure, but she's so ordinary." Meredith clutched the tulle of her skirt, tears forming in her eyes, but forced a smile on her face.

"I'm sure she'll manage to impress you just fine. Give her time, it doesn't happen overnight, it certainly didn't for me, she choked out." Webber rested his hand on the small of Meredith's back, before slowly nodding to her.

"I'm terribly sorry but I must go, it's been a long day and evening and I'm spent," she said stiffly and formally, before curtsying and turning away, fleeing backstage. Once there she slumped to the floor in tears. She knew it was the disease, she knew she was reliving the past, but despite everything, despite her bright future and her current success, her mother was stuck in the past and she was still a failure.

* * *

She didn't know how long she was there for, but the next thing she knew Amelia was waving a hand in front of a face and she was blinking, not used to it. She snapped out of it and jumped slightly, wrinkling her nose.

"What?" she asked her, taking a hand away from her face; it had black streaks of mascara on it.

"Have you been here this whole time? What happened? Your face is a mess. We've been looking for you," Lexie piped up, handing her a few makeup wipes. She turned to look in the mirror and groaned; her face had mascara tracks down her cheeks that she carefully wiped off, before turning around and letting her head rest against the mirror again. It had been a fantastic last show as Kitri and she was going to miss it.

"My mother happened," she said softly, closing her eyes, trying to breathe. It was hard enough having a sick mother who didn't know who she was; having a sick mother who didn't know who she was and who remembered her child being a disappointment was an entirely different ballgame.

"It was…weird. She said she had a child named Meredith but oh, she was a huge disappointment, but I was beautiful and amazing and going places as a dancer, and I wish I could explain to her that both of those Meredith's are the same person, but that's simply impossible," she said, her face crumbling again. Both Lexie and Amelia looked at each other, before Amelia slipped out of the room to get Derek. Lexie sat beside Meredith and sighed, wrapping her arms around her shoulders.

"I know it's not easy, and it's going to get harder, and I know you understand it all and that's not going to make it any easier, but focus on you. Focus on Derek. Focus on your wedding in August. Focus on the here and now, and how the critics love you, and how pleased Webber is with you," she said softly. It made Meredith smile a bit.

"Webber…he's known me since I was little. He trained me to perfection. He and my mother are close. Too close. Sometimes…sometimes I think he's why we left Seattle. But I try not to think about that because he's my teacher and mentor. He gave me this whole speech before the ballet tonight and it was nice. But then I saw Ellis and I fell apart, Lex. She can't even remember I'm her daughter and she has the ability to make me fall apart still. I'm never going to be good enough for her and it sucks," she sighed, as Derek entered the room. He looked at the two Grey sisters talking, before reaching down and scooping Meredith up in his arms. Her engagement ring was still pinned to the inside of her costume, so he unpinned it and slid it back on her finger for her.

"Meredith, there is no crying in ballet," he teased her, and she made a face at him, dramatically falling back in his arms, her pointe shoes hitting his thighs.

"There is when Ellis Grey is involved," Lexie piped up, as she went to change out of her costume and into something comfortable, knowing there would be drinking later. She had turned 18 over the past season, finally a legal adult ready to ignore Thatcher.

"Oh god, what did she do now?" Derek said, ready to basically have Meredith do a back walkover from where she was. Meredith spoke up from her nest of tulle.

"She's sundowning and talking about her twelve year old failure of a daughter, but oh I'm so amazing and going to go so far," she rolled her eyes with a sigh. Derek sighed and kissed her forehead before he put her down.

"Go change and get ready, we're drinking tonight," he told her, as she stripped off her costume and pulled on leggings and a hoodie. Hair and makeup would be fixed at home. Soon enough, the tired crew piled into the two cars and made their way to the house, where they dropped their bags and fell into chairs and onto couches as Derek and Mark dragged out all the booze they kept stocked in the house by default. Meredith reached for the bottle of tequila and hugged it to her chest, while Lexie went straight for a bottle of vodka. Mark and Derek always preferred scotch, while Owen liked whiskey. Amelia liked a mix of everything, but tonight she was drinking whiskey with Owen, and soon enough everyone was drunk and telling stories.

* * *

Meredith always seemed so bright and happy on the outside, but it was during drunk times that she let it all out.

"I think I have it all figured out," she slurred, laying on her back on the living room floor. She had had at least 8 tequila shots and she barely weighed 98 pounds, so it was safe to say she was drunk.

"My mother and Richard were sleeping together, and Thatcher and Adele found out. And then my mom found out she was pregnant with Maggie, and she gave birth to her, and then she dragged me to Paris," she said, slightly dazed that she could piece this all together. Lexie lay next to her, the two sisters ear to ear, as she clutched the bottle of vodka.

"But like. Richard and your mother. Richard. And. Your. Mother."

"Yeah…I mean, Maggie is their daughter," she announced to the room. None of them had known until now, they had just known she was Ellis's daughter and Meredith's half sister. This stunned them all into silence. Meredith continued.

"I don't know, my life was so fucked up before I came here. I never saw my mother except in the classes I had with her, and she taught company class sometimes, and choreographed for the company, but I was alone. She was never home, she was always out with some patron of the company or another, and I had a nanny, and when I was past fourteen I was all alone except for the people that staffed our fucking house because it was only the best for Ellis Grey," she sing-songed with a heavy roll of her eyes. She knew that everyone looking in from the outside saw her as a perfect girl, with perfect technique and a perfect life, growing up under the exquisite training of her mother, a world renowned dancer.

"Why did you choose here though?" Amelia asked. She had taken over the couch with a bottle of Jack. Meredith laughed bitterly.

"Because Seattle is thousands of miles away from London. But then she ended up here anyway and now she doesn't even know who I fucking am," she said tearfully, before grabbing her bottle of tequila and heading upstairs. She found herself in her walk-in closet, fitting snugly in among her array of dresses and gowns. She was successful beyond belief at her age, enjoying the end of her second year in a major American company, and here she was crying over a mother who couldn't remember her and never loved her anyway. She could hear everyone talking downstairs as she nurses the bottle of tequila, feeling like she was in absolute agony. Her father hadn't come after her, she had a mother who never wanted her. It was times like these that it was so painfully obvious just how weak she was, just how vulnerable. She was 19 years old and had no parents to lean on.

Except she did. Because she had had the incredible luck to catch Derek Shepherd's eye, and not only that, but she was a part of the Shepherd family, and she was marrying him.

It took awhile before anyone came looking for, and soon the dark closet was filled with light as Derek switched off the lightswitch. She was tiny enough that she couldn't be seen, but she could hear Derek sighing.

"Mere, I know you're in here, and eventually you're going to throw up or have to pee, so come out," he said, and finally Meredith stuck her head out from a row of evening gowns, her face streaked with tears again. His face fell and he walked into the closet, sinking down to the floor and pulling her into his lap.

"Oh Mere," he sighed, holding her close as she cried. She wasn't sure how long she cried for, it could've been hours, but she cried until all her tears had shed, and then she cried more. She cried for all the years she had been alone, first in Paris and then the years she had been alone in London, alone but not alone, floating through life and running from her mother's harsh insults. Then running to Seattle and finding her niche, rising through the ranks and becoming a respected, well-known dancer, only for her mother to become sick.

* * *

She cried until she fell asleep, and Derek gently carried her to bed and let her sleep, staying with her all night. He watched her there, worn out, tired, upset, until the sun started to rise and he was finally able to fall into a fitful sleep. It was a Monday and they were off, and Meredith didn't wake up until noon, with a terrible hangover, her makeup still on and her hair still back in a bun. She remembered last night, sharing her pitiful life story, crying for hours…and then she must've fallen asleep.

She striped out of her sweats and climbed into a shower, melting the previous day away. She vowed she would never dance Kitri again, no matter how well she did it – it brought back too many vivid memories of being abandoned, of her mother not being there while she won top prize.

After she showered, she snuggled up in a PNB company shirt and leggings, leaving her hair down for a day before heading downstairs for a cup of hot chocolate, wanting a break from coffee today. Everyone was downstairs and luckily they were nice enough to not mention their friends complete meltdown the night before as she busied herself in the kitchen, hating that she made a show of herself. Once she had made her hot chocolate, she smiled at everyone and headed back upstairs to her and Derek's room.

Dirt had been broken on their house in the woods already, which she was excited about, and she lay in bed looking over the photos of the foundation. So far, it was huge and she was in love with it. She grabbed her laptop so she could do more wedding preparations – she and the bridesmaids all had their gowns ordered, she was going for a gown fitting next Monday, they had the church set up and the reception place booked, she had the flowers ordered…there were now just a million different details left to do that she could do during rehearsals, and that she knew Carolyn was helping her take care of.

* * *

Tuesday, the unbreakable Meredith Grey was back in the studio, ready to handle anything. They were rehearsing Gayane, as their first performance was tonight. Meredith had the lead and as they were going over it, Meredith lifted her chin, dancing the familiar steps of the dance as the corps danced behind her in Dance of the Rose Maidens. She had been in the corps of the dance the summer she danced at the Bolshoi, and it was fun being the lead finally in the ballet she loved. It was a very Communist-era Russian ballet but she loved it just the same. Derek was of course her partner in the ballet, playing the love interest, but after her dance it was time for the famous Sabre dance, and Meredith and the girls had time to rest. Yesterday was forgotten and she was looking forward from now on.

The show that night went on without a hitch and Meredith confidently took her bows next to Derek. This was her life, she knew she would be doing this for years. Derek was her partner both in life and in ballet, and as she held his hand on stage, she looked over and smiled at him, knowing she had made the right choice, accepting her position at Pacific Northwest almost two years ago.

* * *

 **This ended up being 7 pages in word! I usually write 5-6! Like I always say, it sort of just wrote itself! Haha. I'm sorry if the ballet stuff is boring to you guys but to me it connects everything Hope you like it!**


	28. The Wedding

The end of the season came quickly, and soon the dancers were saying goodbye. After rehearsal for their last show, which was to be La Sylphide, Webber called dancers into his office. Meredith was nervous; she was waiting for her beloved Principal promotion that everyone was sure she would get. With a promotion would be more juicy roles, and even more soloist and principal roles, and more prestige in the company. In La Sylphide she was one of the many soloist sylphs, dancing with Derek, until she was pulled out of rehearsal, making the walk of horror to Webber's office. She knocked on the doorway and he motioned her inside. She shut the door and sat down in one of the chairs, crossing her legs.

"You requested me, sir?" she asked anxiously, raising her eyebrows. To his credit he smiled warmly and pushed a piece of paper across his desk towards her. She leaned forward and took the paper – it had her yearly salary on it, which had been raised at least 15k, and underneath were the words she had been waiting for:

 **Meredith Grey – Principal Ballerina**

Tears started running down her face and for once, she was glad she never wore makeup to rehearsal. She couldn't believe it. She would be going into her third year at PNB as a principal ballerina. She had worked her entire life for this, had entered the Royal Ballet Company at age 15, and now, nearly 20, she was a principal dancer. Amelia was going to kill her; she was now the youngest Principal that PNB had ever had. Reaching foreward, she quickly signed her name on the contract before she stood up, still crying. Before she left the room, however, she turned around.

"Thank you, sir, I'm forever grateful. But with all due respect, I think you need to talk to Maggie Pierce as she is my half sister and you are her father. I don't want to know the details of your relationship with my mother, or the fact that you are my mentor and practically my father, but Maggie knows Ellis is her mother and I'm pretty sure she knows you're her father and she needs something to hold onto now that Ellis is sick," she said with a small smile, before leaving the room. She took a deep breath before heading back into the studio. Lexie was called next; they were being called in alphabetical order in order of seniority. Meredith wandered into the studio in a daze, after squeezing Lexie's hand in luck. She was a principal dancer now, she was at the top of the ballet foodchain. Derek grabbed her by the wrist and looked at her; she was still crying and he looked worried.

"What's wrong?" he asked her, and she looked up, still bawling.

"H-h-he promoted me," she said, tears sliding down her cheeks as she choked on her sobs. Derek smiled proudly and pulled her into his arms, rocking her back and forth with a huge smile. They were finally on equal standing in the company despite their age difference, and he was insanely proud of her.

"Amelia's going to kill you," he laughed, knowing how much she prided herself on being the youngest woman in history to be promoted to principal dancer in PNB. Meredith couldn't help but laugh before pulling away, as Lexie ran into the room, a grin on her face.

"Soloist!" she shrieked, throwing herself at Meredith, and Mere screamed with her little sister, holding her close.

"I got promoted to principal," she whispered in her ear. "Don't tell anyone, I have to tell Amelia myself," she winced, knowing Amelia would blow up. She knew the principals would simply be getting raises; there was nowhere else for them to go in the company except to retire when they were too old, and then they would probably end up as a master or mistress of a ballet company.

* * *

That night, getting ready for La Sylphide, with Meredith doing her hair just right for the ballet for her role of Effie, Amelia was already dressed as the sylph, looking glowy and ethereal.

"So what was your result of your mini-meeting with Webber today?" she asked Meredith, poking a pair of earrings in as she hovered over Meredith. To her credit, Meredith kept her face neutral as she did her makeup, using her makeup brush to brush blush over her high cheekbones. She slowly turned in her chair, smoothing down the skirt of her Effie costume.

"I, um. He promoted me to principal," she said quietly. Amelia's eyes widened and she could see her quickly changing mood as she fought for words to say. She was proud for being promoted to principal at 23; she was nearly 25 now. Meredith wouldn't be 20 for another month and had only been with PNB for two years. She knew she was favored by Webber, but wasn't aware that there was THAT much favoritism, or even if that was coming into play. Her eyes flashed and she turned around, storming from the room before she could say anything she would regret. Meredith let out a small sigh and turned back to the mirror and her makeup, hating that her promoting was going to drive her and Amelia apart simply because it made her jealous.

* * *

The show went flawlessly, with Meredith dancing her last time as Effie. She danced it like she hadn't danced before, with grace and beauty, like she deserved her promotion. It wouldn't be announced until September but she wanted to audience to know she deserved the position and title next to her name in the program every night. Slipping into her dressing room and getting ready to go home after the show, Amelia appeared behind her and she looked up, slightly scared.

"I've decided not to hate you, or be jealous. You didn't sleep with anyone to get ahead, you earned the position with your pure talent You're young, you're the youngest in PNB history, and I can accept that. Your mother was one of the bests and she passed it onto you. Welcome to the big leagues, Grey," she said with a smile, wrapping her arms around the girl who would soon be her sister in law. Meredith smiled warmly and turned to embrace her, the two of them sharing a moment before it passed.

* * *

Suddenly it was July and Meredith was celebrating her 20th birthday. It passed in a haze of a garden party in her backyard, with wine, beer, tequila, good music, and half the company. It didn't feel like her birthday, especially since her wedding was coming up in less than three weeks but she celebrated just the same, getting drunk and letting loose for the first time in months.

Her wedding gown hung in Lexie's closet, locked up with a key that only she and Lexie knew the location to. Everything for the wedding was set; it was just a few weeks away and she was getting giddier as it came up. They had to wait for a honeymoon but she didn't mind; tour would be like a honeymoon since they were touring Europe anyway.

* * *

Three weeks passed quickly, and suddenly Meredith was waking up on the morning of her wedding day. Derek, Owen, and Mark had slept at Mark's old apartment, with Derek's sisters piling into Meredith's house. The moment she climbed out of the bed she had shared with Lexie and Amelia the night before, she felt butterflies in her stomach. She was getting married. Today. She was going to be Meredith Shepherd, legally. For her career she would always be Meredith Grey, but really, she would be Mrs. Meredith Shepherd.

The morning was a blur of hair and makeup, trying to eat food but not being hungry, drinking mimosa after mimosa and getting increasingly giggly as it came time to get into her wedding gown. The gown was a Vera Wang confection of lace and tulle; it had a strapless bodice of lace with a huge tulle skirt with a train, lace embroidered all over the skirt. She felt like a princess as Caroline, Amelia, and Lexie helped her into it and she gazed at herself in the mirror. It was one thing wearing the gorgeous tutu's she danced in every night, but this was her wedding gown, the most important piece of clothing she would ever wear. No, it wasn't clothing, it was a work of art. With her hair done up and pulled back, her makeup professionally done, she looked older and sophisticated beyond her 20 years.

Her bridesmaids wore lavender strapless dresses and carried bundles of white roses; Meredith had a bouquet of purple tulips and white roses tied with a ribbon of lavender. She descended the staircase, making sure she had her something old (an old diamond bracelet of her mothers), her something new (the Jimmy Choo's she had splurged on), her something borrowed (a diamond necklace she had borrowed from Susan), and her something blue (the garter around her left thigh had a blue ribbon running through it). Everyone stood at the foot of the stairs, all eyes on Meredith, gasping when they saw how gorgeous she looked, Amelia and Lexie bringing up the rear. Maggie fussed around her with a smile, happy to be part of her half sisters wedding. The entire time, the phototgrapher had been floating around the rooms, capturing moments between everyone, and he had the bridal party pose with Meredith, and then individually.

Climbing into the limo in her huge gown was a fete, but she managed it and was all settled, the Shepherd girls around her as well as the Grey girls, and Maggie – who was technically a Grey but didn't share their last name. All in all she had seven bridesmaids, and there were seven groomsmen, with Amelia being her maid of honor and Mark being the best man.

The ride to St. James Cathedral wasn't long, and as they arrived they were whisked away to a room to wait. Guests were still coming in and Meredith's stomach was fluttering with butterflies. Soon though, they were called to line up and Meredith felt out of control. Thatcher was by her side and she squeezed his hand tightly; they had grown close because of Lexie and she was glad she had at least one parent. She knew Ellis was there, but she also knew Ellis had no idea what was going on.

One by one, her bridesmaids disappeared down the aisle until it was her turn. She kept time to the music until suddenly her hand was being placed in Derek's and he was lifting the veil off her face. She passed her bouquet to Amelia as the priest started the vows. She had wanted them to write their own but between everything, they hadn't had the time unfortunately, so the traditional ones would suffice.

In no time at all, a ring was slipped on her finger, and she was slipping one onto his, and suddenly he was kissing her in front of the entire congregation and she couldn't stop smiling. She was Mrs. Shepherd and she couldn't be happier.

* * *

The reception was a blur to her; all she remembered was dancing all night and drinking champagne, having fun with friends and family. It was fun and a night to remember, especially as her bouquet landed right in Amelia's arms.

Right after the wedding though, all of them had to pack for their European tour, and the house was sent into chaos. The girls ran from bedroom to bedroom, swapping leotards and tights, whatever got mixed up in the wash, packing enough hairpins and bobby pins to last months, and as many pointe shoes as they could fit into two suitcases that weighed under 20kg, plus clothes to go out in and normal shoes. They were in a frenzy as the boys looked on, laughing and teasing them. Finally they were ready, and they departed for their first city, London. Meredith was thrilled to dance on the stage that she grew up on, taking class with people she grew up with, performing gorgeous Balanchine ballets in her last days as a soloist. From London they went to Paris, to Berlin, Frankfurt, to Vienna, Moscow, to Kirov, and by the end of August they were back in Seattle.

* * *

Right before they went back to PNB for the fall season, a press release was sent out with everyone who had been promoted. Meredith held her breath, waiting for the uproar to come out over her being promoted so young to come out, but it never came. The critics agreed that she was talented and it needed to shown more, that she was the second coming of her mother, a prodigy, that she was becoming a household name in the world of ballet and the performing arts. It made her head spin; she was only 20 years old and there were two ways to go – down or up. Both ways scared the crap out of her as she headed into her third year at PNB.

* * *

 **Whipped up this chapter, yay! I apologize the wedding wasn't more on a grand scale, I didn't want it to be as huge as the other wedding I just wrote plus they had to go run out on a huge tour! Either way I hope you like this chapter Please read and review!**

 **Also, apparently song fics on this site are illegal? I never knew until some social justice warrior decided to review my MerDer songfic and outline me with all these different points, so from now on if I do a song fic, it's not going to say so in the description Super pissed off about this person, apparently they go around and stick their nose where they aren't wanted. What I'm going to do is take down the fic and put it back up without the word song fic in the description, because I'm pretty sure they reported either the fic or my account for breaking rules.**

 **Anyway. Enjoy the chapter!**


	29. Final Shaking

Coming back to PNB in the fall was odd. Meredith walked down the hallway carrying her dance bag into her dressing room, the new apprentices and corps members scurrying around her. As she reached the dressing room she had shared since her corps days with Amelia, Lexie, Callie, and Arizona, she rolled her eyes a little bit.

"Apparently being a principal evokes fear in new company members," she smirked, slipping her dress over her head and pulling her hair up into a thick twist of a bun. She rolled her pink tights down and over her feet, which had had time to heel over the past few weeks. They were still painted from her wedding, somehow, and she was tanned from her honeymoon in Bali.

Amelia couldn't help but laugh and roll her eyes.

"Please, they're brand new, they're babies! They have no idea what they're in for or what they're doing here," she laughed, sticking pins into her bun to hold it in place. Meredith rolled her eyes and pulled a black leotard over her pink, threadbare tights, a pair she'd probably owned since she was 13, grateful she had grown out her bangs before her wedding.

"Was I all wide eyed and bushy tailed when I joined?" she wondered, and Callie, Arizona, and Amelia all shook her head. Arizona spoke with a smile.

"Maybe about Derek but not about company life, you'd been at the Royal, nothing fazed you," she shrugged, putting on some lip gloss before grabbing some pointe shoes and heading into the studio. Meredith took some pride in that, knowing nothing phased her. Grabbing her own pointe shoes, she, Lexie, and Amelia headed into the studio and to their places at the barre, knowing that the guys would be there soon. Lexie was a soloist with Meredith, Amelia, and the three guys as principals, and they were beyond thrilled.

* * *

Barre was challenging after a few weeks off, but stretching her muscles felt good, it felt natural. With each plié her bones cracked and it felt nice. Coming back to a routine in general felt nice, neck held high, legs even higher. She felt pure adrenaline rush through her body; this was what she was meant to do with her life and she knew it more than ever. 20 years old, married, and a principal ballerina. Her possibilities were endless.

The whole time during center and going across the floor, she was anxious as hell. She knew the casting list was just outside the door in the hallway and she wanted to know what she had been cast in. She still did her best work, however, earning gasps of awe from the new members, coming down from leaps with a smirk of satisfaction to Derek and Amelia. She was absolutely in her element.

After class came Pas de Deux, She could feel the jealous stairs of the new girls, and even some of the guys, as the watched her and Derek perform the grand Pas from Swan Lake perfectly, instructing the class on how to do it the way they'd been doing it for years. Izzie and crew glared more than usual, probably because they were now married and to her, more annoying than ever, but Meredith just found **them** more annoying than ever. They were in their 20's and she refused to get over their teenage crap and rivalries – Meredith had excelled and been promoted to principal, while Izzie and co were still stuck in the corps. After Derek turned her into an arabesque and Izzie passed in front of her, looking super pissed off at the pair, Meredith rolled her eyes and Izzie caught it, scoffing at her.

"Maybe if you channeled your energy into ballet you'd be in a different place by now," she said sweetly, Amelia shocked by her gall. Meredith went on like nothing happened, like nothing had phased her, and it hadn't. She kept moving through class with a smile on her face, and when they were finished for the day, Derek dipped her in a low fish dive, leaning down and pressing a kiss to her cheek before putting her upright on her pointe shoes.

"I love you," he grinned, his hands on her waist before she leaned back and caressed his neck.

"I love you too," she smiled, before Lexie ran in and announced that casting was up. She placed a kiss on his lips before dashing from the room, elbowing her way towards the front to the board. Dances at a Gathering, Coppelia, Sylvia, Giselle, Interplay, Moves…it was busy but three were short Balanchine ballets that would take up one evening and the rest would be one evening in themselves. She was to learn the roles of Coppelia with Amelia as Swanhilda, Pink in Dances at a Gathering, Giselle, she and Derek were the main two in Moves along with Lexi and Mark, Owen and Amelia, Ben and Arizona, Jo and Alex, and April and Jackson, and Sylvia, with Lexie as Diana. Her schedule was full in her first year as a principal and she was pleased as the junior members made a path for her as she headed back into the studio.

She and Derek were rehearsing Moves in the smaller studio, while the corps were rehearsing Coppelia in the larger studio. Moves was unique in that there was no music, just the counts of 8, and Meredith had trouble with it at first before they really got into it. Eventually she was landing all her jumps and turns, with Bailey watching them perform the complicated dance. All six couples were having fun with the dance, the girls sliding across the room in their pointe shoes to tap the men on the shoulder, complicated lifts in the air, being thrown from one guy to the other…it took a great deal of strength and precision to execute the difficult steps but Meredith loved it, it was invigorating and unlike any other ballet she had ever danced before. Jerome Robbins was a geinus and if she could dance the works he and Balanchine had choreographed for the rest of her lie, she would.

* * *

After a short break from Moves, Amelia and Meredith were brought in to learn their parts in Coppelia. It was one of those ballets that was almost always in a company's repitoire and Meredith loved it. In the past she had always been a village girl, but this time she was the title character. She and Amelia were leaning against the barre, exchanging their crazy stories from tour (the parts that didn't involve each other) and they stood giggling at the barre before Webber clapped his hands.

"Shepherd and Shepherd, come out to the floor," he said, and Meredith felt like she was in a daze; he had been referring to her. No one referred to her as Mrs. Shepherd, it was still Miss Grey, but she wasn't about to complain. The music started and she began Coppelia's entrance to the village, with the corps girls dancing around her.

Rehearsal was long and hard as they prepared for so many dances/shows, and Meredith turned to leave, grabbing her warm ups, ballet flats, and her water bottle. The door, however, was blocked by Izzie and many of the other corps girls – She was glad that Maggie was with her, however, as Lexie, Maggie, and Amelia filed in behind her.

"Excuse me," Meredith said politely, raising her chin. "You're blocking the door," she said matter of factly. Izzie stood her ground and stared at her, her eyes cold and heartless.

"Yes, I am. It's time we have a little chat, Meredith," she said, and Meredith could hear Amelia take in a sharp breath. She had been dealing with Izzie far longer than she had. Behind her as well, she could hear the light shift of weight and the exasperation of Cristina, who hated Izzie just as much as the rest of them.

"Really, Izzie? You're going to do this?" she asked her, crossing her arms and dropping her things on the floor.

"Of course I am. Since day one you waltz in here, all ballet royalty, the daughter of freaking Ellis Grey, and it seems to me and most people that you get special treatment. You get the best roles, you get promoted every year. You're a principal ballerina at age 20. You're Webber's protégée. He shows you off to every sponser like you're something special, and to the rest of us, you're not anything special. You're just an ordinary dancer who happened to come in and fuck Derek Shepherd." Meredith recoiled at that, looking down at the rings on her finger, before looking up at Izzie, who was continuing to talk.

"You're thrown on stage for Addison, you're best friends with Callie, Arizona, and Amelia. Of course you're going to get the best roles. Your mother is one of the most famous dancers and we all know she slept with Webber, where else did Magggie come from?"

Before she knew it, she had reached forward and slapped her across the face with her left hand, her hand with her rings on it, knowing it would hurt extra hard.

"How dare you talk about my mother, my father figure, and my sister like that," she said coldly, her green eyes flashing as she looked up at the taller girl.

"Do you want to know why I've been promoted every year, do you want to know why I get the roles I get? Because I have talent. Because I don't focus my energies hating on someone I don't know. Because I focus on dancing and improving myself instead of wasting my talent hating someone else in the company. Jealousy isn't a good look on anyone, Izzie, and it's pretty ugly on you. You're stuck in the corps and that's where you're going to be until you get over the fact that I didn't sleep with anyone to get where I am, that I got here on pure talent. The fact that I'm married to Derek means nothing, my private life is private and my work life is my work life. Derek and I dance well together and Webber likes that, he puts us together because we work well as a couple and as dancers. Maybe you'll finally be able to stop dancing with George once you stop gossiping and improve your technique," she seethed, before gathering her things and pushing past her. "Now if you excuse me, I have more roles to learn, because unlike you I'm not a petty 16 year old stuck in ballet school," she sniffed, as her sisters and friends walked out behind her.

After that day, Izzie left her alone and never gave her a snide look or comment, at least to her face. Meredith was 20, she was a professional dancer, and had left her own snide comments behind when she was 15 and had joined the Royal Ballet Company. There simply wasn't enough room in her life to be a catty bitch.

* * *

 **So I finally wrote the Izzie/Meredith showdown! Yay! Still coming up with ideas for drama ;) Hope you like this chapter!**


	30. The Anfortas Wound

The fall season was a busy one for Meredith. With her debut in Sylvia she garnered high praise, and she loved every bit of the ballet. Dancing alongside her sisters every night made her happy; dancing with her husband every night. Even with Derek 8 years older than her, they were in the prime of their lives, dancing in sold out theaters every night to standing ovations and thunderous applause. It helped dancing with your family, your best friends, it helped that you loved what you were doing, it helped that you were good at what you did.

Sylvia was a very simple ballet and not considered a favorite, but Meredith loved it for it's simplicity. The music was beautiful; the scenes were simple as were the costumes.

Giselle and Coppelia on the other hand, were grand scale affairs. She adored her costume for both Giselle and Coppelia, and getting to dance both roles. She knew as principal she would be sharing roles with the other girls, but this season, as the one new principal, she was to be featured in fall, winter, and spring, before she would be changed out with the other girls.

One night she was getting ready to go on as Coppelia, and Amelia was doing her Swanhilda makeup. Everything was going according to plan, with Meredith warming up at the barre in their dressing room, ballet flats on.

"My ankle is bothering me," she said, flexing and pointing her foot a bit in an attempt to stretch it out. She sat down on the ground and fished some tiger balm out of her bag, rubbing it into the muscle. The pain started to go away as the menthol and heat worked it's way into her skin. She went around her night as if nothing was the same, heading upstairs and putting on tonight's pair of pointe shoes. She had recently changed brands and styles of shoes, settling on something other than Freed's, which only lasted 8-10 hours per pair and she went through like water.

Doing some jumps in the wings, she got ready for her entrance and her valse. She didn't notice anything was wrong until after the mazurka, when she was dancing again, and came down on her right foot. Nothing snapped, but her foot just didn't feel right. She kept dancing, she kept going through the motions of the ballet unfeeling and trying to keep her emotions on her face.

Finally it was the end and she took her bows, smiling, the curtain closing, and she sank to the ground in a pain that she hadn't felt the past two and a half hours. Derek turned to grab her hand and found her on the ground clutching her ankle.

"I need a pair of scissors!" he yelled, and someone passed him a pair as he rushed over to Meredith. He cut the ribbons from her ankle and pulled off her pointe shoe, rolling back her tights. Her ankle was swollen and black and blue, almost purple, and Meredith looked up at him with tears running down her face. She'd been injured before, sure, that was almost normal for dancers, but never like this. The fact that she had landed hard and twisted something, then kept on dancing, had resulting in this.

"Oh, Mer," he said, scooping her up in his arms and carrying her to her dressing room. Amelia, Lexie, and Maggie were behind him, with Webber bringing up the rear. She continued to sob as he put her down on the couch. Webber turned around and looked at all the people in the room.

"Someone call PT and one of the doctors and see if they want her to go to the hospital," he said, gingerly taking a look at the swollen ankle. Every touch hurt and Meredith wanted to throw up from the pain – the adrenaline of the ballet had gotten her through the pain, really.

"Derek, tell me this isn't happening," she cried, leaning her head back. She couldn't be injured, she had the rest of fall season. It was only the end of September. Closing her eyes, she focused on her breathing and tried to ignore and tune out everything else in the room.

When she opened her eyes again, physical therapy was touching her ankle and a doctor was there.

"It's a bad sprain, at the least, she needs to go to the hospital and get it x-rayed. She'll be out at least a month in recovery," the doctor said, and Meredith started crying again, quietly this time. Derek was still on the floor by her head but once he heard she had to go to the hospital he got up.

"Mer, come on, I'm going to help you change so we can go to the hospital," he said. Everyone but Amelia and Lexie cleared out, and the three of them helped Meredith out of her costume and tights and into her leggings, shirt, and hoodie, her feet in flip flops. Derek carried her down to the car while Amelia and Lexie insisted on going with them to the ER. He was too upset to argue so he let the sisters come, and they were off.

* * *

Meredith lay in the ER, staring up at the ceiling. They had given her ice for her ankle and some morphine for the screaming pain she was in, but on the inside she was sobbing. She didn't know if this was a career ending injury or not. Finally they took her off to X ray and she looked back tearfully at Derek. She couldn't put weight on her foot so she had to have help in the x ray room, but finally she was back on the bed and they were giving her more painkillers. The nurse told her it would be about half an hour until results were back, and she slowly drifted off to sleep from the drugs.

The next thing she knew she was being woken up by the doctor.

"Mrs. Shepherd, hello, I'm Dr. Flynn. We have some good news and bad news. The good news is that it's not broken, just sprained. It's a bad sprain but staying off of it and not dancing for a few weeks will heal it. The swelling and bruising will go down in a week or so, and in the meantime we'll give you a boot to help immobilize the joint and muscles." Meredith was so happy she could cry. It was just a sprain, she'd had hundreds of ankle and foot sprains before.

"Thank you so much," she smiled in relief. She was still dizzy from the pain medicine but she could work through a sprain and keep up her strength, and even just take barre in a week or two. She knew her roles would have to be replaced and suddenly she wanted Lexie in her roles, darling Lexie who danced just liked her with such grace and elegance, just like her older sister.

"I'm writing you a prescription for Percocet for the pain and I advise you to follow up with your own sports medicine doctor," he said, handing Derek the prescription, having Meredith sign her discharge papers. After the doctor left, Lexie and Amelia helped her get dressed and into the boot, and the four were off to go home.

* * *

The next day Meredith had to face her fears and head to the studio with everyone. Despite the fact that she had a severely sprained ankle and almost snapped her tendon, she was going to sit into class and rehearsals, but first she had to hobble into Webber's office. Knocking on the door, he motioned for her to come in.

"How are you Meredith?" he asked her, looking at her foot in the boot.

"Better than yesterday. It's a bad sprain, he said I should be back on my feet in a few weeks in ready to dance. Sir, I wanted Lexie to dance my roles. She knows them very well and she's fantastic," she said. Webber raised his eyebrows at her.

"I was going to give them to Arizona, she hasn't been featured in awhile. Lexie is a bold mood and favoritism of your sister, since she's just a soloist."

"I was a corps member when I danced many principal roles," she retorted, knowing she was being stubborn. "And I don't trust anyone to dance with Derek except my little sister," she said. Webber sighed slightly.

"I'll see what I can do and rearrange."

Meredith smiled before backing out of his office, turning to go to her dressing room. Once there she checked herself in the mirror. She wore a leotard and tights under leggings and a long sleeved shirt, her hair in a braided bun, and she sighed. Not dancing was going to be killer. Dance was like oxygen, she needed it to live.

* * *

 **Things are starting to heat up here at PNB!**


	31. The Prince and the Sugar Plum Fairy

It was a month later and Meredith was back in the studio. Every morning she rubbed heat cream into her foot, wrapped it in an ace bandage, and pulled her tights down over it before slipping the entire thing into a new pair of pointe shoes, loosely tying the satin ribbons. Taking her place at the barre between Lexie and Derek, she received smiles from everyone around the room. It felt good to be back.

Taking a deep demi-plie felt nice, her bones cracking every time and she smiled. Her ankle hurt just a bit, but she had popped a few advil beforehand. Class breezed by easily and then it was rehearsal time. She had to figure out how to dance Giselle again with a still-hurting ankle. Richard and Derek were patient with her as she danced through her dances, adjusting the steps that hurt the most, but the pas de deux's couldn't be altered, she had to dance everything full out including everything on her right ankle. Strangely enough, though, it didn't hurt when she went up on pointe on her hurt ankle. It actually felt great, stretching her ligaments and tendons as she did eight turns and bent into a deep penche, Derek supporting her. It felt so natural to come back to ballet after being a month off. It was like oxygen, like taking a deep breath after being deprived.

That night she danced Giselle after Lexie taking over her roles, and from then on she danced up until November. For November they had off because they were learning Nutcracker, and then performances started the day after Thanksgiving. As a principal, Meredith wasn't sure what she was hoping for in Nutcracker. A few of the lead roles maybe, but she figured Amelia would get Sugar Plum again. However, as the crowd parted for her as she went up to the board to see what role she would have, tears filled her eyes as she saw her name across from SUGAR PLUM FAIRY. She had done it. She had reached the prime role in Nutcracker land. Most dancers didn't really like Nutcracker, it was just a chore they did every year, but Meredith found it fun, especially now that she was the main star this year, with Derek as her Cavalier

* * *

Rehearsals went great, with Meredith and Derek shining in every group rehearsal. Their big dance was The Prince the Sugar Plum Fairy Pas de Deux, one of the most famous Pas in all of ballet, and she couldn't wait to dance it. Rehearsing it felt amazing, she was dancing like crazy and loving it, working her ass off.

Opening night was stressful, with everyone running around. Meredith ran up to the stage to find someone to fasten her up. Her pointe shoes were on, the tiara was pinned so hard to her head that it hurt, and she was almost ready for her entrance. One of the dressers fastened her into her gorgeous purple costume and she grabbed her wand and her pouch of fairy dust, leaping impressively onto the stage between the little 7 year old dances and doing her dance, leading the angels off the stage and welcoming everyone in the second act the to land of sweets, before perching on her throne with Clara (Lexie) and Fritz (Alex).

The three of them watched the dancing confections dance by, before Meredith walked off stage to get ready for her pas. She stood nervously in the wings – she had done this before, when she had been thrown on in Addison's role. Doing this every night though – that was different.

She started the Sugar Plum Fairy dance, hitting every step and turn, before nailing her ending pose with a smile. She ran off stage before running back on with Derek, and their romantic Pas ensued. It was one of her favorites, despite the many ballet she had been in, simply because the Grand Pax was so beautiful to her, and so romantic. She gazed at Derek and he gazed back at her, the pair of them lost in the steps. Soon the dance was coming to a close and Derek threw her in the air and caught her in a fish dive on the way down, the two of them beaming.

The tarantella was next, with the coda after that, the pair of them naturally in sync with each other. Turn after turn, jump after jump, they nailed everything. Meredith could spot Webber in the audience, smiling proudly at his star dancers as they landed gracefully on the floor with a smile, arms open, not a hair out of place on either of them, to a roaring crowd of thunderous applause. Meredith was astounded by the praise of the full house, knowing she had done it.

* * *

That Christmas was a huge affair. Their new house had been finished and Derek had invited his entire family, along with the entire company, over for Christmas Eve. The whole bottom floor was crowded with dancers and Shepherd family members, who were eager to meet the PNB dancers. As Meredith walked by Izzie and her loyal followers, she could hear them muttering about the McDreamy's and their wealth, and for once Meredith just rolled her eyes and walked on, her heels clacking on the wooden floors as she went to refill her tumbler full of tequila. She wore a long red dress, her hair in curls, with strappy black heels on, neverminding the rain pouring down outside as she wove through the crowded house in search of Amelia. In typical fashion, she found her drunk and making out with Owen in a dark corner of her new living room.

"Amelia" she whined, gulping some straight tequila from her glass. Amelia broke off from Owen and looked at her.

"Yesss?" she asked her, clearly annoyed that her kissing had been disrupted and Meredith threw her arms up, too drunk to care anymore so she ran off to find Lexie.

"Lexie lexie lexieee," she sang as she found her little sister, who was talking to Kathleen. She slipped her arms around Lexie's waist and held her close as Kathleen told her all about life at the Royal.

"So how is it, now that my mother's gone?" Meredith smirked. Kathleen had to laugh at that.

"We have this new guy, we call him Riggs, he's like a fucking drill sergeant I swear to god. Everything has to be done so quickly and swiftly, so precisely and if we get it wrong we have to do the entire exercise again. He's crazy," she said, rolling her eyes heavily.

"But you know, it's ballet, it's the job. We do it because we love it" Meredith and Lexie nodded along, they knew exactly what it was like to dance for the love of it, and not the job aspect.

"Grab your coat and come outside," she smiled," grabbing a dramatically long black wool coat and the bottle of tequila. Lexie met her outside a few minutes later brandishing a full bottle of vodka. Meredith giggled add wrapped her arms around her little sister.

"Sooo," Lexie started with a smile, turning to her sister and taking her hand out of her pocket.

"Mark asked me a question before the show tonight," she smiled, holding her hand in from of Mer. Mer was wasted but that didn't mean she didn't understand the value of what she was seeing. "Lex you're waaaaay too young to be engaged!" she slurred, before looking down at her engagement ring and wedding ring. She was only married four months and she was 20, and Lexie turned 20 in March.

"Merrrr, you're my sister, you're supposed to be supportive."

"And I am, Lex. You're marrying one of my best friends," she grinned, throwing her arms around her and hugging her sloppily, before they clinked their alcohol bottles tonight. It had stopped raining and drunk Meredith wanted to go swimming.

"I'm getting in the pool," she grinned, shedding her coat and shoes and running on the wet grass to the gated pool area, getting out of her expensive dress and jumping into the heated pool in her black lace bra and panties. Lexie's eyes went wide before she joined her, the two sisters yelling back and forth. Derek could hear them and he wandered outside with Mark, Owen, and Amelia, and couldn't help but laugh as he found his wife and sister in law in the pool.

"Fancy a Christmas swim?" he smirked. Meredith swam to the edge, steam rising from the warm water and she smirked, looking up at them. Derek knew she was drunk but he amused her by stripping down to his underwear and jumping in. The rest of the party followed, and dancers trickled out of the house until there was an all night war in the pool.

* * *

Friday for Nutcracker, everyone was still hungover/drunk, including Amelia. They all moved slowly with their shoes, costumes, hair and makeup. Meredith wasn't needed until act II, but she didn't care, she liked to watch from the wings. As she watched Amelia as Snow Queen, she got into her Sugar Plum costume, and as Amelia passed she could smell vodka on her breath. Sighing, she did some rises in the wings, breaking in the pointe shoes more. After about ten or more minutes passed and the angles brushed past her and she smiled, remembering the days of being an angel. That seemed so long ago.

She made her grand entrance and the rest of the ballet went well, taking her bows at the end with Derek and Lexie, before heading off stage. In the dressing room she still smelled vodka and frowned, but brushed it off, despite spying Amelia drinking something clear out of a water bottle that wasn't liquid. She said goodbye to everyone, wanting to just go home and sleep in her huge, brand new house, and as she met Derek in the hallway she smiled, sliding her hand into his. For that moment Amelia slipped away as they headed home.

* * *

 **Soooo Amelia's slipping into alcoholism! Hmmmm.**


	32. Allegro Vivace

By the end of Nutcracker, Meredith was tired and looking forward to her month off. It was her and Derek's time to finally spend married time together and go on their long-awaited honeymoon. As they took their final bows on New Years Eve, she couldn't wait to get out of her tutu, despite the fact they had the company's annual party that night.

Standing beside Derek in a column of silver satin, Meredith sipped her champagne, her hair tumbling in curls down her back. She hated these formal events but she had to attend them, especially now that she was a principal dancer and one of the company's leading stars. She had joined the ranks of Derek, Amelia, Arizona, Callie, Teddy, Mark, and Burke, among others, at the tender age of 20. She should be in college, getting drunk and partying, but instead she was dancing her life out on stage every night for sold out audiences, wearing her body down ever so slowly.

At midnight she and Derek quietly slipped outside, where a soft rain was falling, music coming out of the presidential suite. He took her hand in his and slid an arm around her waist, slow dancing with her. She couldn't help but laugh at the irony.

"Out of all the dancing we do, slow dancing is never any of it," she teased him, leaning in for a small kiss as fireworks danced in the background around them, of all Seattle. She just couldn't wait to get away from all of it, to get away for a month of fun.

* * *

New Years Day morning came all too soon, and with it, a light hangover. Meredith didn't care though; they were going on a trip to St. Barts for three weeks. No ballet, no hierarchy's of the ballet world, no bitchy corps members while she had been promoted to principal in her three years there. She threw a few more things into her suitcases before throwing on leggings under a sundress and pulled on a cardigan, fumbling with her hair in the dark before Derek turned on the light.

"Morning sunshine," he smirked under the covers, and she turned around, rolling her eyes.

"Morning lovely," she smiled, brushing her hair down her back, letting it stay down for once. She had no reason to pull it back into a severe bun for a change.

"Excited?" he asked as he climbed out of bed and got himself into jeans and a t-shirt and button up, and she slid her feet into black flats, going for the all black look apparently. She didn't bother with makeup; it was all packed, and soon enough they were driven to the airport by Amelia, who was up early to take class on break like a good little principal dancer.

Meredith sat in the back of the car, nearly falling asleep as Seattle woke up. Once they checked their bags and got through security, Meredith smiled as they took seats by the airport windows, watching the planes take off and land. She was excited to go somewhere again that wasn't tour; they had done Paris by themselves but that seemed so long ago, when he had first proposed to her, and now they were married.

"You excited?" He asked her again, poking her arm. She lifted her head and giggled a little bit.

"Definitely," she smiled, leaning over to kiss him. Just her, Derek and a private villa in St. Barts. Absolute paradise. She couldn't wait to get there and throw away her winter clothes and slip into a tiny bikini and a slip dress. But for now she was falling asleep on Derek, waiting to board the plane.

They didn't have to wait long, and soon she was drifting off to sleep in their first class seats, Derek's arms wrapping around her as she smiled happily.

* * *

It was a nine and a half hour flight and the pair slept most of the time, only waking up when they felt the wheels going down. Meredith got excited as she glanced out the window and saw white sandy beaches and clear blue water.

"Derek! Three weeks of this," she grinned as the plane landed smoothly on the tarmac, and soon they were in the tiny airport retrieving their bags and heading out to the car that was going to bring them to their hotel. Meredith shed her leggings and cardigan in the car, in the balmy 85 degree heat, her face plastered to the window, her hand never leaving Derek's. They stopped to check in and get the key to the villa and put down a credit card, and Meredith was going crazy. Finally they pulled up to the villa and she was in awe by the rambling white structure that seemed to go on forever, but stretched to the ocean.

Climbing out, she scrambled to the front door; she flung open the door as their bags were brought in around them. Kicking her shoes off she ran around, getting the layout. Two bathrooms, a bedroom, a kitchen, a dining room, a living room…out back was a huge deck, an infinity pool, steps down to their own private beach. And the beach itself. It was dark outside, but it was illuminated by torches, and Meredith smiled, sinking her feet into the still-warm sand.

"Mer!" she heard her name and turned fast, as Derek snapped a photo of her. Bathed in the light from the torches in her black dress, her hair whipping around, he caught her in a rare stage of pure bliss and he smiled.

"Come here! The water's so warm," she grinned, turning and running back to the surf. This was what he got for marrying someone eight years his junior. He stripped out of his shirts and pants, opting for his boxers, and leaving his phone on a lounge chair before running after her and grabbing her at the waist.

"Hah!" he laughed, dipping her in a swan dive, her face close to the water as she shrieked, her arms flailing, completely uncoordinated from what she normally was in the studio, before he stood her up again, the warm water rushing around her ankles. She laughed, unhindered by the confines of the studio.

"Oh my god I hate you," she giggled, leaning in and kissing him deeply, her arms sliding around him closely. She didn't want to end this moment but she was so tired, despite sleeping all day on the flight. She wanted to run around and play, but they walked back to the desk. She spied the pool though, and remembering the Christmas party, she smirked and pulled her dress over her head, before slipping out of her bra and underwear.

"You joining me?" she asked, before slipping into the pool naked. He swallowed before losing his boxers and following her into the pool, catching her around the waist.

"You are the most gorgeous person in the entire world," he whispered to her, against her wet body. She took in a deep breath as he pressed her against the pool, one of her legs wrapping around his waist, and then the other, as they adjusted themselves. He slowly entered her and she kept herself quiet in the still, humid night air, the two of them having each other on their first night in St. Barts.

* * *

The next morning, Meredith rolled over and realized she was naked. She remembered sex in the pool, and sex on the couch….and then sex in bed. Sitting up, she realized Derek was still in bed next to her and the sun was streaming in through the windows. Her phone said it was noon and she laid back down with a smile. Honeymoon. Vacation. She could get used to this.

She picked up the phone and ordered room service for the two of them, knowing they'd let themselves into the villa and she sunk back into the sheets, enjoying her time in bed. She closed her eyes, and it seemed like seconds before she heard the front door opening, when really it was an hour. The smell of waffles and eggs wafted into their room, waking Derek from his slumber and he rolled over, pulling Meredith to him.

"Morning gorgeous," he grinned, pulling her towards him. She gladly went and snuggled up to him as she heard the doorway to the villa close shut behind them, knowing food was in the kitchen.

"Morning love," she smiled, nestling her head into his chest as they lay there for a few moments, gathering each other in their arms. Day one of their honeymoon was here and she was more than ready. The peaceful serenity surrounding the villa was amazing, and she could hear the waves crashing on the shore. It was pure bliss and she couldn't wait for the day to begin.

* * *

 **Glad that reviews are back up finally! Now time to update all my stories again Read and review please!**


	33. Strette-Gallop

Coming back to Seattle from their honeymoon was like being pushed into an entirely different world. It was cold, it was rainy, and Meredith was cranky and irritable as she sat on the floor of her dressing room. Amelia and Lexie were trying to coax the highlights of her honeymoon out of her, while Arizona and Callie listened in the background, but Meredith was curled up on the couch in a thick sweater and leggings, her feet encased in booties, her hair blonder against her tan skin.

"It was amazing, it was a honeymoon. We swam, we went snorkeling, we had some days out on boats, we did a lot of things. There was a lot of sex," she smirked, wiggling her eyebrows at Amelia, who looked disgusted at the thought of her brother having sex.

"Amelia, there's going to be babies one day," she teased her, but she knew it was true. They both wanted children, probably not until Meredith was in her mid to late twenties, but there would be babies. Over Christmas, Nancy had announced that she was pregnant with her first, and she would be dancing with SanFran until she was too big for her stomach to be hidden in tutu's. All of the Shepherds were excited, especially Meredith and Amelia.

"Come on, we have to get to class!" Arizona said, as Lexie dragged Meredith off the couch and the five women headed towards the studio. Once there Meredith slipped into her place at the barre, every joint in her body cracking in a good way.

By the time they got to adagio, her body was warm and melting into the movements, and by grande allegro she was jumping across the floor higher than she felt she had ever had. This was her year to dance better than she had ever danced before, to land the best roles, to be recognized by the press for more than just the youngest principal in the company. Her head snapped around with each pirouette, her toes pointed just that extra inch, and she flew higher than all the other girls, with Webber nodding his approval at her. She didn't need his approval; she danced for no one but herself these days, especially with Izzie and her brats muttering in the corner. She ignored them, brushing back her blonde hair as she stepped out of the room, knowing the casting lists were up.

Nikiya in La Bayadere, Raymonda in Raymonda, Odette/Odile in Swan Lake, Cinderella in Cinderella…her eyes were wide at her daunting roles. She was literally being pushed into the spotlight and for a moment she swallowed, feeling scared. There were also a few smaller ballets she was in, but these were the four big ones. For a moment she wanted to turn and call her mom, and her heart sank when she knew she couldn't – not only did her mom not only know who she was, but her mom didn't even know who she was most of the time. She felt like crying but stood up straighter and wiped her eyes, tucking a loose piece of hair back into her bun and marched into the studio, grabbing her chunky sweater again.

Bailey eyed her and Meredith shrugged her shoulders, retucking the ends of her pointe shoe ribbons into the knot before standing up. Everyone else was filtering back into the room, having glanced at the casting lists, and were either congratulating Meredith or shooting her death glares – there was no inbetween. Derek came over and gave her a small hug and she melted into him, taking a deep breath. Amelia was her second cast and she was pleasantly happy with that; every other night each girl would alternate for each other, or if one was injured the other would go on, but really, Meredith was the star. Hadn't she worked the past 17 years of her life for this?

* * *

The most demanding of the ballets, Swan Lake, was always the first to be rehearsed. Meredith had danced Swan Lake with PNB before, but they were changing parts of the choreography to reflect her much stronger physique and her new technical skills. Odile, the more potent of the two characters she was to portray, was the role they attacked first. Even outside of rehearsal she attacked the Act 3 Coda, Meredith worked tirelessly on her fouette turns, her pique turns, and her chaines, going at the three turns with such force, determined not to get anything wrong. Adding doubles and triples into her fouettes was easy for her, and before she was called to rehearse the coda she had the steps down perfectly. Her eyes were on the prize – mainly not screwing up the classic ballet.

Once she had Odile down pat, they began with the steps of the much softer role of Odette, before proceeding with the Pas that included Derek, and then joined the rest of the company for rehearsals, which was much more fun than spending hours in an empty and silent studio, turning endlessly.

* * *

Cinderella was much more fun, dancing around the studio with a broom, with Alex and George as the step-sisters wearing pointe shoes. She had to tease their inability to do pointe but praise them for trying – that was the pointe, it was a a male character role. They'd be in wigs and dresses with other the top makeup, while she as Cinderella was delicate and feminine. It was a fun role to play, especially when they would eventually get to dress rehearsal and the scenes with Derek as Prince Charming.

Being a principal ballerina had it's perks, and it had it's exhausting moments, but Meredith wouldn't change anything at all. At age 20 she had everything she wanted. A career that kept advancing whether she wanted it to or not, a husband, sisters right and left, and above all things that she had always wanted, a family.

* * *

 **I'm sorry it took me so long to update! My dance company's show is TOMORROW! And I'm still injured oops. I posted a pic on my twitter, which is merderinabar! You should totally follow me, I post constantly, follow back, and I'm super friendly! Anyway, hope you liked the chapter! Next chapter will be show time and maaaaybe another storyline I've been contemplating for a few weeks? No McBabies for awhile though.**


	34. Fearful Symmetries

The season opened with Swan Lake, and dressed as Odette, Meredith was nervous in the wings. Her headpiece was too tight on her head and her costume was a bit too big on her stick-thin frame. Her act-1 pointe shoes were on her feet as she paced back and forth, doing a few jumps to warm up, moving her feet back and forth. To say she was nervous was an understatement. Everyone who was anyone in ballet was in that audience today, ready to see her succeed or fail.

Once her cue came she bourred onto the stage, enchanting Derek as Seigfried, and the two of them danced together, along with the little swans and big swans, while Meredith got ready for act 3 with dramatic makeup and a gorgeous black feathery tutu and headdress. Again she stood in the wings, ready to go on stage as Odile and enchant Seigfried with her powers. She was nervous for the coda but it turned out she didn't have to be: she nailed every moment of it and received a standing ovation as she curtsied, humbled by the audience's acceptance. Running off stage, she quickly changed back to Odette and made her entrance again, before Odette and Seigfried leap into the lake and die together as lovers, ending the ballet.

It was a trip, and took so much energy out of Meredith as she stood backstage and cleaned her face of the heavy stage makeup, before changing into a cocktail dress. They were expected to be in the lobby as soon as possible to schmooze with the patrons of the ballet, and Amelia zipped Meredith up, leaving her hair in a bun as she quickly did some more subtle makeup with some red lipstick, putting on jewelry and slipping her sore feet into strappy high heels. Once she was done she stood up, wobbling slightly, and smiled as she found Derek at the door, sliding her hand into his as they made their way to the lobby.

Everyone clapped as soon as Meredith entered and she blushed deeply as Webber took her hand and led her into a group of people who pestered her with questions. Thank god Derek was next to her, she found herself faltering at some points, her brain stretched thin from dancing like crazy all evening. Once they were finished with that group, someone touched her arm and she looked up into the smiling eyes of a middle-aged man.

"Hello," she said politely, her green eyes warm.

"Hello, Miss Grey. I'm the ballet master from New York City Ballet. If you have a moment, I'd love to have a chat with you." Meredith's eyes went wide and they went over towards the wall, Meredith dragging Derek with her.

"We've been watching you for a long time, since you joined the Royal as an apprentice. If you wanted to, we have a spot waiting for you in our company," he said, folding his hands in front of him. Meredith's eyes went wide. She loved PNB; her entire family was here, but NYCB! Living in New York and dancing for Balanchine's company…

"With all due respect, sir, I'm very grateful for the offer but I'm not sure I could leave Pacific Northwest. My husband is here as are two of my sisters, my sister in law, and their boyfriends," she said, straightening up as she drove a hard bargain.

"I'll see what I can do," he said to her, and she raised an eyebrow. Was he honestly willing to bring Lexie, Maggie, Amelia, Owen, Mark, and Derek with her? Did he want her that badly? Beside her, Derek cleared his throat.

"This is my husband Derek," she smiled warmly, her hand on his chest.

"Oh, Derek Shepherd. Huge fan, you're one of the most talented dancers I've seen in this day in age." Derek smiled and shook his hand, one arm still around Meredith's waist.

"It would be an honor to come and dance for you, sir," he smiled, squeezing Meredith around the waist. He had only ever danced professionally for PNB; it would be such a change to live in New York and dance to NYCB if they chose to.

"Well, I'll see what I can do about everyone and get back to you," the ballet master said, giving the couple a smile. Out of nowhere, another man slid up to them. This one, they knew. Kevin McKenzie.

"Derek Shepherd. Nice to see you again. Lizzie talks endlessly about you and how wonderful you are." Derek through his head back in laughter; even though he was younger, he knew Lizzie idolized her brother.

"And Meredith Grey. So young and so talented. How do you do it?" he asked her, and Meredith sipped on her champagne.

"Having Ellis Grey as a mother helps," she smiled sweetly, knowing that her mother's name still held heavy weight in the ballet world. Kevin's eyes went wide, as if remembering that Meredith was Ellis's daughter.

"Let me cut to the chase. I'm here because ABT is looking for fresh talent and we want you two. The entire world knows of your amazing chemistry and the way you two dance together and we want you. Lizzie talks non-stop of how much talent you have, how Meredith has more talent than she does and Derek can out dance anyone in ABT," he said, looking between the two. Meredith sighed lightly.

"Really Kevin, we're flattered, but there are a lot of factors to decide. My two sisters are in the company here, Derek's sisters are in the company, and then there are Owen and Mark to consider. We drive a hard bargain. It's all of us or it's no one," she said, putting her foot down. She knew how much it was to ask, taking five principal dancers, a soloist, and a corps member into a large company, and many of those were all related, and Kevin sighed.

"We want you, badly. We would do anything to have the two of you, you would be valuable assets to our company. I'll go home, look into the budget, and work with you. Contracts will be mailed out in June." Meredith couldn't believe what she was hearing. She was going from PNB to ABT at the end of the year, making a move from Seattle to NYC.

"I suppose I don't have a choice in this?" she asked, her eyes narrowing and Kevin looked at her tiny, petite frame, Meredith's nose wrinkled.

"Would you like a choice? You know ABT is one of the best," he told her, and Meredith sighed before turning away and stalking off. She felt like she had no choice in the matter, no choice whether to leave PNB and join ABT. Yes, she had given him terms and conditions and he had seemed happy to abide by them, giving her her family at ABT, but she had worked her ass off at PNB, she was comfortable there. But maybe that was the thing, maybe she was too comfortable. Derek caught up with her and grabbed her arm.

"Are you okay?" he asked her, and she bit down on her lip.

"I don't know. I don't really want to leave here, but I have no room to grow here. I'm at the top, where else is there for me to go? They're giving me everything but there's so many more principals. At ABT I could grow and learn more, we'd be with Lizzie, and your mom would be closeby, and then Amelia would be there too…" she trailed off and shrugged her shoulders, grabbing two flutes of champagne off a passing tray and downing them both in less than a minute, letting the bubbles go to her head. He nodded slowly, knowing how hard this was for her.

"Let's just dance out the rest of the season and see how it goes, okay?" he said, kissing her forehead gently and pulling her into his arms.

"Don't let anyone know ABT is recruiting us, especially not Bailey or Webber." Meredith merely nodded, the bubbles rushing at her and suddenly she was tipsy.

"I love you, you know that?" she whispered, gently pressing a kiss to his lips.

"I love you too," he smiled, pulling her close. Whatever the future held for them, all he knew is that she was going to be with him.

* * *

 **So I wanted to throw something into the mix that would kind of throw their world off their rocker! Tell me what you think they should do in your review!**


	35. Presto

Meredith danced through the season, the thought of an ABT contract on her mind. It made her feel guilty and disloyal each night as she took the stage, plastering on a smile on her face as she danced night after night at McCaw Hall, faking her way through the rest of the season.

One night as she was getting ready for Romeo and Juliet, the role that had thrust her into the spotlight and something Richard had chosen to replace La Bayadere with Romeo and Juliet, insisting that the audience would love to be reminded of Meredith and Derek in the roles that made them the couple that they were. As she stood in her purple Juliet costume, having her hair braided, she knew it was true. They were dancing to sold out audiences at very Romeo performance, and the audience was fabulous for all their other performances. Once her hair was done, Meredith started on her makeup as she heard footsteps behind her.

"You can leave now," she heard Amelia's angry voice say to Callie and Arizona, and the two girls fled from her. Meredith put the makeup sponge down and turned around, an eyebrow arched.

"You bellowed?" she asked, noting that Amelia held an envelope in her hands and a letter was unfolded in them.

"Yes. What exactly is this?" she asked, handing the letter to Meredith. She took a deep breath – it was Amelia's ABT contract, naming her a principal dancer and, Meredith noticed, giving her a hefty pay raise.

"It looks like a contract Amelia," she said, before turning back to the mirror and continuing her makeup. Amelia rolled her eyes at her sister in law, sinking into the chair beside her. Her bun was already impeccably done and she was dressed in her pink maiden's costume, feet sticking out of her tights.

"I've been trying to get into ABT since I was trained at the school there, but they didn't want to take me because of Lizzie. Several months ago I saw you and Derek schmoozing with Kevin and now I'm being offered a place at American freaking Ballet Theater? What sort of magic did you pull? You are twenty years old, you haven't been a professional nearly half as long as I am and yet you wave your hand and magic happens," she spat out. Meredith paused in putting on false eyelashes and turned to Amelia, the corners of her mouth twitching.

"I have no idea what you're going on about, Amy," she said, before grabbing the tweezers and expertly putting on the false lashes, moving on to do her eyeliner.

"How many other people got contracts like me?" she asked Meredith, her voice low. Meredith finished painting on her winged eyeliner with the liquid before setting it down, looking towards the door. It was closed. She took a deep breath and bit her lip.

"You, Owen, Mark, Lexie, Maggie, Derek, and I all got contracts. Kevin expressed a strong desire to have me and Derek and we simply told him we weren't leaving PNB unless we had you with us. So he told us he would go back to New York, move around some money, and fit the seven of us in. I didn't think…I didn't think he'd actually do it. And now I don't know what to do. I am almost twenty one years old and I have no idea what the fuck to do. Do we take it? It's more money. Take it and move across the country and dance for an even bigger company, an even more well-known company. Or decline it and spend our life here? I have no idea what to do, and I feel like the decision is resting on our shoulders because we're the ones who made the bargain," she said, feeling like she wanted to collapse and cry.

"My mom is here, how am I supposed to leave my sick mother and move across the country? Do I uproot her and take her with me?" she said, everything running through her mind at once. She turned back to the mirror and absentmindedly continued doing her makeup as Amelia started hers beside her and Meredith sighed, her heightened features marred by her internal struggle.

* * *

Half an hour later, Meredith grabbed a fresh pair of pointe shoes and headed up to the stage to put them on. Sitting on the ground she tied the ribbons just tight enough before coating the toes in rosin, doing a few rises in the wings. There was a whole dance before her entrance and she watched the corps and soloists do their thing before it was her entrance. She ran onstage and managed to block out everything else, focusing on the ballet and not the drama that was unfolding among her family members.

Once the ballet was over though, everyone cornered her and Derek inside the men's dressing room. As tiny as she was, she felt even smaller as she pressed her back against Derek. Lexie and Maggie looked excited that they were included, Mark looked intrigued, Amelia was torn, and Owen was just confused.

"If you would all shut up, we can explain," Derek's voice boomed over everyone's, and Meredith flicked Amelia in the chest, who looked offended. Meredith just rolled her eyes at her and let Derek talk.

"At the beginning of the season, after the first performance of Swan Lake, Kevin McKenzie propositioned me and Meredith, trying to get us to join ABT. Meredith somewhat sassed the poor man, telling him we would only join if he brought you people with us. He told us he'd move some things around and to expect contracts. In the meantime, we didn't want to mention anything to anyone in case he didn't come through, and obviously we don't want anyone else here to know. We all know it's more money and more prestige but it's a lot to think about, but we also need to have a group answer when our contract renewals come from Richard in a few weeks."

The group nodded and Derek wrapped his arms around Meredith from behind, while the group chatted amongst themselves. Maggie had the most to gain; she was a corps member and would be getting a significant pay raise, as well as a spot in an amazing company and the opportunity to dance with Misty Copeland, a prestigious woman of color who rose to fame in ABT. On the downside, she would be moving from her parents – both adoptive and biological. Meredith wanted it but there were so many things to consider – her standing at PNB, being a young principal at ABT, moving her mother across the country, breaking her ties with Richard, and moving away from her own parents – not like she spoke to Thatcher except when he came to see Lexie dance.

She looked up at Derek with a small sigh and wrinkled her nose.

"For the first time in my life I don't know what to do. I don't feel confident about this. I think my brain has decided what we should do, but my heart isn't entirely sure," she confessed to him, and he hugged her tighter.

"We don't have anything to lose, Mer. We have everything to gain," he promised her, and she took in a ragged breath. He was right, he was always right.

"How much more did they offer you," she murmured quietly. They had offered her a $15,000 pay raise, and the amount made her heart skip. The money didn't matter to her; she had her inheritance from her mother plus the rest of her mother's money, but it was still a big deal, that her presence and dancing mattered that much to someone else, that she was wanted that badly. Derek swallowed and bent down, whispering in her ear as her eyes widened. Goddamn, they were wanted badly. Clearing her throat she left Derek's arms, standing in the middle of the group.

"Guys, um. I think we should stake it. I don't know how much everyone was offered, but it's clear they really want us," she said, her head still spinning at the numbers. Everyone looked at her, it was clear in their eyes they wanted it just as much as her.

"But I think I should talk to Richard and prepare him," she said, swallowing and feeling dizzy.

* * *

An hour later, after washing her face and throwing on a blue floral dress, she found herself standing in front of the door to Richard's office. The moment she had been dreading had come. Raising her hand to knock on the door, she heard his voice inside.

"Come in," he said tiredly, and Meredith opened the door and stepped inside. She was definitely nervous for this conversation, but was doing everything she could to keep herself calm and collection.

"Hello sir," she said pleasantly, taking a seat in one of the chairs she had found herself in many times over the past three years. He gave her a smile as she nervously fiddled with her rings.

"To what do I owe this pleasure Miss Grey? I've been working on the contracts for next year, hoping they're ready to go by the end of the season," he said with a smile. Meredith faltered, feeling like she was going to throw up.

"That's something I wanted to talk to you about, sir. Myself, and several others, won't be back next year," she said, the words spilling out of her mouth before she could stop them. Her face turned to stone as she watched Webber, and his face fell.

"What's going on? Are you not happy here? Am I not giving any of you enough? Who is leaving?" he questioned her, and she felt tears in her eyes. She always tended to cry when authority figures were involved.

"No, it's none of that. Just. Another company is extremely interested and I said I wouldn't go unless certain terms and conditions were met, and they met my terms and conditions," she said tearfully. 21 years old and she would be migrating to her third company. She was looking at homes for Ellis, and she and Derek were trying to find a big enough apartment so that all of them could live together instead of being spread out. PNB was where she had grown and been promoted and thrown into roles at a moments notice and so much more. But she also wanted to be somewhere where she wasn't the star at the age of 21, where she had room to grow and wasn't always heading every ballet.

"Meredith, we can offer you more if that's what you want," and she angrily cut him off.

"That's not what I, or anyone else wants. We were offered more and as a group, we decided to take it. I am their spokesperson because I am the one that they wanted in the first place, I am the one that laid out what I wanted, and I am the one who won the bargain," she said simply, before standing up and holding out her hand.

"It was a pleasure being with Pacific Northwest Ballet, and I thank you for the time I spent here," she told him honestly. She knew she would miss it here; she would miss spending time with Callie and Arizona in their dressing room in the morning and before shows, she would miss many things, but so many more opportunities were opening up to her.

"I'm truly sorry, sir. You're practically my father, you're my sister's father. I…I know you and my mother were together for years," she exhaled, bringing attention to the elephant in the room. Richard looked surprised that she knew but Meredith just rolled her eyes.

"Come on, my mother had a child with you! She came back and taught here for a year and I knew she was seeing you! I'm 21, not stupid, I know things," she said, throwing up her hands in frustration before turning to go.

"And for the record, the other people are Derek, Mark, Owen, Amelia, Maggie, and Lexie," she said, before walking out of the room and never looking back.

* * *

They had a week left at PNB, and their last show was Jewels. Amelia was the lead in Rubies, Lexie was the lead in Emeralds, and Meredith was once again the lead in Diamonds. It was only fitting that Meredith danced last, waltzing across the stage in a white and silver tutu adored with crystals, a tiara pinned to her head.

Taking her final bow was bittersweet; she could feel like the applause was louder than ever and she felt her eyes welling up with tears, but she knew it was for the best. Once the curtain went down she found solace in Derek's arms, before heading to her dressing room for the last time. She took off her costume and returned it to the dresser with a smile, betraying nothing. Packing up her theater case, she hugged Callie and Arizona, promising to visit the women at their apartment over the summer, but she knew it would never happen. In the morning there would be a press release about the 7 PNB dancers leaving the company and joining ABT without looking back.

With a small sigh, Amelia, Lexie, and Meredith looked at each other, dragging their theater cases downstairs and to the cars. The guys were waiting there with Maggie and Meredith bit her lip.

"Did we do the right thing?" she said, as she and the other girls loaded their things into the trunk of Derek's car. Tonight they were all staying at her and Derek's house, and probably beyond that, as they figured out a place to live and Maggie and Meredith found a place for Ellis. Meredith sunk into Derek's arms and he held her close.

"We did the right thing," he promised her, kissing the top of her head as everyone climbed into his and Marks cars, gently coaxing Meredith into the car. It took an hour but they arrived back at the house in the woods, and Meredith slid out and threw open the front door as everyone else shuffled in and sunk onto the couch, all of them looking at houses on their phones or computers, not wanting to eat anything. Eventually they managed to fall asleep on the huge couch, snuggled under the pile of throw blankets Meredith and Derek kept there, and before falling asleep cuddled between Lexie and Maggie, Meredith marveled how she had come to Seattle three years ago knowing no one, and now her house was filled with sisters, their boyfriends, and her amazing husband – and now they were all about to start the next chapter of their lives in NYC.

* * *

 **So I wanted to do something different for this chapter and have them break away from Seattle for a change, especially since this is an AU and it's about ballet. I really hope you guys like what I did! Stuff like this happens in the dance world all the time haha.**


	36. The Spell

Packing up her things once again in order to move, once again, didn't phase Meredith. It was the leaving of the beautiful, custom made house that they'd lived in for just under two years that irked her. They had decided not to sell the house, or her house, but she knew she was going to miss waking up to the peacefulness of the woods and have to get used to NYC.

They had chosen to buy a huge townhouse with what seemed like a million bedrooms so that the seven of them could all live together instead of apart. The press release of them leaving PNB had dropped after their last performance, and instead of going out to face reporters, Meredith was channeling her energy into getting ready to move to NYC, deciding what to take and what to leave. In the end, she packed up all her clothes and everything that was close to her heart, but as a whole they decided to leave all of the furniture since they were keeping the house.

Suddenly it was moving day; most of their things had been shipped to Carolyn's where they would be staying while the house was finalized, and Meredith stood in the doorway to her dream house, 21 years old and closing another chapter on her life. She knew New York would be exciting and important, but she sighed as she took one last look at the house before locking the door behind her.

* * *

The first few days in NYC were crazy; she and Derek finalized on the house and the group started to move in, and they all went to ABT to get acquainted with the rest of the company before they headed out on tour for the summer. Meredith was grateful for a summer off; they wouldn't be starting until September. She had lived in New York for summer programs, but never actually permanently lived there, so she had to get used to living there and learning the city, which she knew would be fun with her sisters. She and the sisters had done most of the home decorating and left the men at home, waiting for everything to be delivered while the four girls took NYC by storm.

"What should we do first?" Meredith said, sliding a pair of sunglasses over her eyes. Her long hair hung down her back in soft waves and she wore a floral sundress, something she could never wear in June in Seattle. The heat rose in waves off the streets and Meredith could only smile, loving her new home already.

"We should go shopping of course," Amelia smirked, leading the group towards Fifth Avenue, and Meredith laughed as she shook her head. When did they have time to wear real clothes? They lived their lives in leotards and tights, pointe shoes and tutu's, but she let Amelia indulge herself as she, Maggie, and Lexie followed her across Central Park, basking in the greenery in the middle of the city, one of her favorite places since she had done the summer program at ABT back when she was younger.

Breezing past Fifth Avenue, they found themselves in Bloomingdales, raiding the formalwear department, because as Amelia put it 'you could never have too many gowns for galas.'. Meredith simply rolled her eyes but knew she was right; she was tired of the ones she'd been wearing for PNB galas and parties and knew ABT was on an entirely different level.

"Fiiine" she gave in, grabbing a few she liked in her size as the others did the same, heading to the fitting rooms with the others behind her, ready to have a fashion show. For girls who lived their lives in ornate, expensive tutu's, they really didn't know what to wear the rest of the time.

Mer was the first one out of the fitting room, wearing a black and white color blocked gown. The top was black satin with the bottom a white ball gown satin skirt, flaring from her hips in a way she actually liked. Staring at herself in the three way mirror she turned, looking at herself from the back as well as Amelia, Lexie, and Maggie all came out in their gowns. Somehow, she was the leader of the sisters – maybe it was because she was the only married one and that held some clout, despite Amelia being older than her by four years. The rest of the girls followed, all four of them complimenting and admiring one another. Meredith held out her phone and took a selfie of all four of them with a smile, texting it to the three boys before she whisked away to her fitting room, the four of them trying on dress after dress, gown after gown, with the bill being signed 'Mrs. Meredith Shepherd' and the four sisters carrying bag after bag with gowns and cocktail dresses for the fall season.

* * *

Summer had to come to an end, and with it brought Meredith back to the studio. This time she found herself heading down to the ABT studios and in the early morning light as she pulled on a pair of new tights and a new black leotard she had treated herself to, pulling a soft, cropped warm up sweater over her head, she was all smiles. She was ready for this. Twisting her hair into a bun, she stuck some hairpins into it just as Derek woke up, grumbling that he got to sleep in longer since he only had to run a brush through his hair.

Heading downstairs in their two-story apartment, she was grateful that Amelia had made waffles. She went through the motions of eating one before finding a black cotton skirt in a laundry basket and grabbing her dance bag, slipping on her sunglasses. She was nervous, but ready.

After a half hour subway trip, the group made their way through the back entrance into the studios and suddenly they had arrived. They were surrounded by other professionals, both famous and up and coming, and Meredith felt the excitement in the air. It was a new season, no one knew who was cast as what yet, no one was fighting for roles. All at once Lizzie spotted them and shrieked, drawing attention to them.

"Ahhh! Amelia! Meredith! Derek! Mark! I can't believe you guys are in ABT, oh my gosh!" she cried out, reaching Meredith first, who smiled warmly.

"You and Amelia are in my dressing room with me, Lexie is with some of the other soloists, and Maggie is with some of the senior corps girls," she grinned, leading the girls away. The men quickly figured out where they were and took their places in an empty dressing room, and they all got ready for class quickly, Meredith chatting with Liz about the tour they'd just returned on.

Getting into the studio was interesting; it was huge and Meredith simply wasn't used to the enormity of it. She scoped out the bar situation before Lizzie pushed her into a spot and she looked back, scowling, before Derek stood in front of her and she straightened up. She felt intimidated by how much power was in the room, or more like the star power, but she wasn't about to let it intimidate her into a shell. When the music started she felt her energy surge through her fingertips as it usually did. Lizzie stood behind her and watched her, having only seen videos of her performing before, never actually seeing her dance in person but she was a force of nature to be reckoned with and, laughing to herself, Liz knew that no one at ABT would know what hit them.

* * *

After putting the portable barres back against the wall and taking 5 for a water break, the class divided into two groups. The principals and half the soloists were in the first, and the other half of the soloists and the corps were in the second. Liz and Amelia dragged Meredith up to the front, while Meredith dragged Lexie with her, and suddenly Meredith found herself front and center in a new company, surrounded by prestige while she was nobody. She kept up with the adagio and petit allegro, earning a smile and a nod from Kevin McKenzie.

"Good work, Miss Shepherd," he told her, and her words were automatic.

"it's Miss Grey," she shot back, before her eyes went wide and she blushed bright red with humiliation. No one talked back to him and she had done it on her first day! She sank back into the lines of dancers, wishing she could become invisible as she danced, but alas, with grande allegro she was not allowed a get out of jail free card, and she slumped her shoulders as she slipped to the back of the line to dance with Derek.

"Why are you moping? He called you the wrong name, he should he corrected," Derek assured her, and she sighed, shrugging her shoulder.

"Because look at us. Look where we are. I called attention to myself on my very first day in one of the top five companies in the world," she sighed as it came her turn to go across the floor. Without a step out of place she soared, the other dancers amazed by how high she jumped and how little noise she made while landing, even in her pointe shoes. She gave them a shy smile before shuffling in behind Liz, burying her face in her back.

"I'm doomed here. They either want to be my friend because I'm god, or they hate me because I'm good," she moaned, and Liz turned around to hug her.

"Trust me, they'll see you as their greatest asset my love," she smiled, hugging her favorite and only sister in law close.

* * *

 **So here's our first glimpse of the magnificent seven living and dancing in NYC at American Ballet Theater! I wanted to do casting but I also wanted to save it for next chapter and see how Meredith stacks up to the greats! All my favorite ballerinas are in ABT ;) Misty Copeland is the most famous since she's the first black principal ballerina in the history of ballet but if you like this fic I highly encourage you to go out and do some research! Anyway I hope you like it For their house I picked two apartments I liked and smashed them together haha, it's basically an apartment that's two floors and is centered around a big entry way and upstairs are the bedrooms in a circular fashion and the rooms downstairs are the same way. Now we have to introduce DiLuca for Maggie ;)**


	37. Love Duet

Meredith fell into routine at ABT fairly quickly, becoming disillusioned with the big names all around her. They were just men and women she danced with who happened to have reached a higher level of fame than she had.

She had a routine of waking up, having coffee and something light to eat, taking a pilates class, and heading to ballet class, which consisted of technique, pas de deux, and then hours of rehearsals. She had been placed in the role of Hermia in A Midsummer's Night Dream, a corps role, and therefore several roles in Coppelia, Interplay, where she was one of eight dancers handpicked, and Emeralds in Jewels in a soloist role, her first at ABT. Lexie had landed a soloist role in the pas de trois in Emeralds along with another soloist girl, with Mark as the male. Gillian Murphy was the principal lead and Meredith tried to contain the stars in her eyes as they went through rehearsals, Derek peeking in. They had a short Pas de Deux second to the main principal Pas but she loved having her own solo role, and it was an intense one at that.

The first time she was called to dance her solo in front of everyone else she was nervous beyond belief. The entire company had piled into the studio to watch her – they all wanted to see the girl that Kevin McKenzie had moved mountains for and she wanted to live up to their crazy hype. She smoothed down her long, floaty tutu and closed her eyes, waiting for the music to start. When it did, the studio walls melted away and suddenly it was just her and the music. Her eyes opened but gone were the people around her and she was sailing through the air, her legs up to her ears, executing turn after turn, jump after jump, leap after leap. The piece was around 5 minutes and she was out of breath as she struck her final pose, but the room clapped loudly for her and she smiled brightly. Meredith Grey had certainly arrived at ABT.

* * *

After tireless rehearsals, the season opened up with Coppelia. Meredith was actually grateful she didn't have a major part in the ballet; she filled the many corps and a few soloist roles but other than that she was grateful to hide in the back. She wasn't quite ready to step into the spotlight like she had at PNB; here there were so many senior ballerinas despite her being a principal and she had so much room to grow.

Coppelia was great, and the next night they performed Interplay along with a few other Balanchine ballets, including Serenade. She was so comfortable with her role in Serenade by now, she could dance it in her sleep. The only thing she missed was having Cristina in the triangle opposite her, the two women cursing about the movements and the high intensity of the ballet. It made her smile that night however, that Lexie was next to her and Maggie was opposite her as the ballet took off and she had a reason to smile, especially as Derek lifted her high above his head and she took a deep backbend, her blue costume shining under the bright stage lights. It was another night where she got to hide among other dancers before Jewels premiered that season.

Thursday night she stood in her dressing room with Amelia and Lizzie in her velvet and tulle Emeralds costume, makeup done and pinning her gold and emerald jeweled tiara onto her head. Amelia was in Diamonds in a soloist role, while Lizzie had the principal role in Rubies; Maggie was in the corps of Diamonds. She was excited for her solo as well as getting to dance with Derek in their first Pas for ABT.

Emeralds started all of Jewels, and she danced the opening song with the rest of the Emeralds cast, before running offstage while Gillian danced the pas and mentally preparing herself. Her first solo for ABT. She took a few deep breaths and Derek handed her some water which she sipped, trying not to get it down her costume before she heard the beginning cue to her music and she walked daintily onto the stage and posed, before dancing her heart out.

Her part was around five minutes long and she let herself get lost in the music, something she hadn't done on stage in awhile. She could see Derek out of the corner of her eye, she could see Kevin McKenzie out of her other eye, but this time she was dancing for herself. When her music was finished, she rushed to the front of the stage and curtsied, before running off gracefully. Next was the Pas de Trois that Lexie and Mark were in and she watched from the wing, Derek holding onto her. They were up next in their short Pas; it was short but complicated, with Meredith walking on pointe for so many counts of eight that for the first time in her life her toes were in excruciating pain. They ran off stage and tried to catch their breath before they

"You were amazing, and I'm not just saying that because you're my wife," he whispered, and she laughed, swatting his hand away from her. She was dripping with sweat but she was happy with both of them, twirling around in the wing with him. Derek ran out to dance the coda, after which the corps girls ran off, Meredith running on after only to be caught in Derek's arms, the pair dancing between the corps girls before running offstage, followed by the Pas de Trois, and ending with Gillian and the principal guy Meredith hadn't figured the name of yet, before Meredith and Derek ran back on, dancing opposite Gillian and her partner briefly before the ballet ended.

Breathless, bows were taken before the curtain fell, and suddenly Meredith felt herself being enveloped by Lizzie, who was already dressed for Rubies.

"Damn, if I knew I had a sister in law you danced like that I would've snagged you for ABT years ago," she smirked, as Meredith blushed deeply, clutching Derek's hand.

"I barely remember dancing, I looked out into the audience and it was so huge and dizzying and I just dance on auto-pilot," she laughed as she headed backstage. She could see Kevin headed towards her and she paused, looking up at him expectantly.

"That was beautiful, perfect even. I'd like to see you out front after the show," he said with a smile, and Meredith groaned along with Lizzie as he walked away.

"I hate how that's a good thing, and yet we always see it as a bad thing," Meredith said as they all entered the dressing room. Amelia was doing her makeup and Maggie was in there stretching in her warmups still; Diamonds was last. Her hair was pulled back tight and her tiara was pinned down and Meredith smiled as she started to get undressed, looking at the black halter dress that hit the floor and the pair of heels next to it. Lizzie laughed and rolled her eyes.

"Get used to it, you'll be out there every night after you dance a juicy soloist or principal role," she smirked, hearing the announcement that it was five minutes to curtain.

"Ugh, that's my cue! Let me go find Amelia, woman needs to be on stage to make me look good," Liz smirked, fleeing from their dressing room to find her baby sister. Meredith watched the ballet from the backstage TV's as she got ready for the after-gala, Derek in his own dressing room doing the same thing, Maggie getting ready for the third ballet in her dressing room because she still didn't know the girls she shared a dressing room with. Meredith didn't mind Maggie being there, and she helped her with her makeup a bit and into her costume, feeling sisterly before sending her up to the stage.

* * *

All three ballets went wonderfully and half an hour after Diamonds, Meredith found herself milling around in the lobby of the Metropolitan Opera House, still stunned that she had performed a soloist role there earlier tonight. She was in her little magnificent seven group, with Lizzie clinging to Amelia. All together they were 8 people who were mostly related and thinking about it, it made Meredith giggle as they were approached by Kevin.

"Meredith, come here, I have some people I want you to meet!" She plastered on a smile and waved back at her family, before stepping up to Kevin.

"Oh do you?" she giggled, turning on the charm and smiling brightly, shaking hands with everyone in the small group she had been brought to.

"Everyone this is Meredith Grey, my latest talent. I snuck her away from Pacific Northwest and I'm grateful to have her here; she and her husband were the soloists in Emeralds tonight," he said proudly, and Meredith smiled; she was very proud to have danced the soloist role with Derek for one of the most famous countries in the world.

"You're such a lovely ballerina, dear," said an older lately, and Meredith gratefully smiled, drinking a sip of champagne.

"Thank you," she smiled, feeling like a champagne bubble, light and floaty, on top of the world. She always hated being shown off like a prized pet, but it wasn't so bad with Kevin. She knew he genuinely liked her and her dancing, and wasn't going to treat her like some show monkey because she was good and capable of everything.

"Meredith started with the Royal Ballet, then danced with Pacific Northwest for three years, and I hope she stays with us for awhile, she's an amazing asset," he smiled, and Meredith smiled back.

"Well if I have my way I'd never switch companies again," she promised him, eyeing Derek across the room with a small roll of her eyes. She just wanted to be back with him.

"I have big plans for Miss Grey. Big plans," Kevin smiled, touching the small of her back, and inwardly Meredith groaned.

* * *

 **Okay so kind of a filler chapter but I ended up liking it anyway! I hope you liked it too**

 **I know not many people read this story but I'd love more reviews or suggestions, it would be nice. I know it's not as popular as my other ones but I wish it got more attention than it did as I enjoy writing it and it's disheartening.**


	38. Arabian Dance

November brought Nutcracker season and Meredith was more unsure of her rolls than she had ever been in her life. She shouldn't have been though; she was cast in three and one was a principal role. Party-goer, Solosit Snowflake, Soloist Waltz, and Arabian female, with Derek as her Arabian counterpart. She was pleased with herself, hearing congratulations as she headed to company class that morning, pulling a sweater over her head and leg warmers over her pointe shoes, settling into the place she had created for herself at the barre. She melted into the familiar motions she had perfected over her entire life. _Plie, stretch. Plie, stretch. Grand plie, stretch. Cambre forward, cambre back, tendu second, and stretch. Plie, stretch, plie, stretch…_ It was second nature to stand at the barre and perform these motions by now.

After barre they moved right into rehearsals, starting with Snow. As soloist, she and Lexie were the first two snowflakes onto the stage, leading everyone else, and again they had those annoying pomp oms that drove her inside and always tangled with everyone else. Derek and Mark stood at the perimeter of the room, watching their wife and fiancée dance with such passion and they just smiled, noting how similar the two sisters were despite how much they protested about it.

As always Snow was long and technically difficult, but they learned it in one rehearsal, knowing they had many to fine tune it. Meredith gravitated towards Derek, who held out her ice-cold water bottle which she greedily gulped.

"It looks like shit," she pouted. The corps was made up of apprentices and corps members; Maggie and her friend Gisele were two of them and she adored both of them, they weren't the problem, it was more the junior corps members. he senior ones were getting jucier roles, like the dolls and act II corps, but everyone started in Snow because it prepared you for other roles – it was fast paced and long, giving you enough stamina.

"It does not look like shit, and you and Lex are amazing. Your dancing is in sync with each other, you anticipate each others every move. Almost like you were sisters," he joked, and Meredith rolled her eyes and slapped his arm as Mark laughed.

"Not funny, she is my sister, now she's infiltrating my brain while I dance?" she smirked. Soon they were being called into the other studio to learn Arabian which Meredith was excited for, it was something she had never danced and had never dreamed to dance. It required so much flexibility and she never thought she had it, but Derek insisted she had it.

"Meredith, for Christs sake you can lay on your stomach and bend your head back and it can touch your ass," he whispered as they got into position to walk on stage. Every movement was sensual, calculated, and articulated, with severe backbends while she was on pointe and Meredith couldn't believe she had doubted her abilities as she executed the steps and motions of the beautiful dance, placing a hand on Dereks face and bourreing around him in a circle. She had no idea what her costume would look like but she couldn't wait for them to match each other, as he held her arms and she slid into a center split, before moving forward, legs back, before swinging them around. Soon the dance was over and the couple walked away from the center of the studio, their choreographer happy with their work. She knew later on they'd have to go over the dance again but for now Meredith had a few minutes to rest before she had to do Waltz. Sliding down against the wall, she wiped at herself with a towel and retied the ribbons on her pointe shoes, drinking the water Derek gave her. There were several dances to rehearse before Waltz and she felt herself spacing out as she watched the talent around her dance. Lizzie slid down beside her and wrapped her arm around Mer with a smile, hugging her close.

"So what do you think so far? You survived fall season, what do you think of Nutcracker season?" she asked her, and Meredith stifled a yawn, laughing a little bit.

"Its tiring but I've never been Arabian before, which is kind of exciting. I like that I get to dance with Derek without having a massively huge lead role," she smiled, leaning against Lizzie and putting her head on her shoulder. Liz was Sugar Plum so she had a huge role, and one of the younger, shorter soloist girls was Clara. Meredith was too tall now to ever be Clara again but after two runs, one at the Royal and at PNB, she was sated, unless ABT asked her again next year or something since at almost 22, she still looked like she was 12. Derek looked down at his sister and wife, subtly taking a photo og the two of them, Meredith with her eyes closed out of exhaustion and Lizzie holding her close. Amelia was dancing as lead Marzipan; she was also Snow Queen, having a pas de deux with Owen before waltz of the snowflakes.

Eventually Flowers was called and Mer got up, all of the flowers put into places. She and Lexie were once again soloists, with fellow soloist Skylar Brandt as Dew Drop, and they were taught the dance. It wasn't much different from the Flowers dance they already knew so she settled into the choreography easily enough; it was just another endurance dance and Meredith was sweating and out of breath by the time they took the ending pose. Julie, one of the company teachers, was pleased with them and told them to take a break, and they'd run everything from Snow on again. Meredith flopped down under the barre again and started gulping water; she was just done with rehearsals today and was exhausted. She wanted her bed. And alcohol. In that order.

* * *

After rehearsal they all headed home, Meredith wanting to fall asleep on the walk back to their apartment, with Amelia and Owen excitedly leading the way. They only had a few weeks until opening night, the night after Thanksgiving, and Meredith was nervous. It was one thing to dance every night in different ballets, but to dance in the Nutcracker was completely different. People from all over the world came to see the famous ballet company and Meredith didn't want to disappoint. As the seven spilled into the apartment and headed for their showers, Meredith contemplated running. She was absolutely terrified she would screw this up as she stripped off her layers and her leotard and tights, stepping into the huge shower. A few minutes later, Derek stepped in with her and she sighed, massaging her lavender shampoo into her hair.

"What if I fuck it up? What if I slip on the fake snow and fall flat on my face? What if I screw up our pas, or I mess up Waltz?" she expressed, rinsing her her hair and blinking through the water at him. He was shampooing is own hair and turned to look at her, gripping her by the shoulders.

"Mer, you've been doing Nutcracker since you were six. That's most of your life and you haven't screwed up anything yet," he promised her, and she wrinkled her nose as she washed her body and used conditioner.

"Yeah but this is ABT. Kevin is banking on me, if I screw up I don't get big roles," she pointed out, and he rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Since when is the Meredith I know bothered by big roles?" he said, and he had a point. It was never about the roles, it was about dancing, and she didn't know when it had become about the roles and she huffed for a moment, breezing past him and out of the shower, wrapping herself in a towel before heading into the bedroom.

"It's not about the damn roles," she yelled back at him as she got dressed in shorts and a Royal Ballet long sleeved shirt, before heading downstairs into the kitchen for a glass of wine. She wasn't the only one, it seemed, Amelia was there with a bottle of vodka she was drinking straight from and Lexie was drinking red wine while she planned her wedding. Maggie, 16 years old and the youngest of the group, was sipping on a cider, and normally Meredith would go into protective mode and chide her for it, but she just didn't care, she was mad at Derek and herself as she pulled a new bottle of white wine out of the fridge and poured herself a hefty glass of prosecco.

Amelia raised an eyebrow at her and she stared her down.

"What? Derek and I had a fight. What's your excuse?" she said, nodding to the bottle of vodka Amelia was drinking straight. Amelia shrugged.

"Owen and I had a fight," she simply said. Apparently the three boys were sitting upstairs stewing in their anger as their women drank. Meredith sighed and leaned over the countertop, peeking at Lexie's plans. "Are you having it here or Seattle, Lex?" she asked her sister, sipping on her massive glass of wine. Lexie looked up with a smile.

"It's going to be here in New York, Seattle is too dreary for a summer wedding," she smiled, and Mer smiled back. It was true, but her summer wedding in Seattle had gone perfectly and it had been sunny and warm, somehow.

"Are Thatcher and Susan okay with that?" she asked, the names of her dad and step-mother rolling off her tongue. It was weird saying their names, seeing as how she almost never talked about them, even if they had already visited NYC several times and Meredith and Derek had joined them for dinner a few times at that. Lexie shrugged her shoulders.

"It's my wedding, they just want me to be happy. Oh! Did I tell you Molly is an apprentice at PNB now? She's been begging to audition for ABT but Mom and Dad said no," she smirked. Meredith downed the rest of her glass of wine and laughed.

"Oh of course. Maybe she'll do the summer program," she shrugged.

"Night guys. Amelia, be careful," she said, before heading upstairs and down the hall to face Derek.

* * *

Thanksgiving was uneventful, with all the Shepherd girls and the magnificent seven piling into the Shepherds, but they were all anxious about Nutcracker the next say, and Kathleen was absent as she had to stay in England

The next day they had class as usual, doing a dress rehearsal before everyone took a break for dinner. The seven ran to their favorite restaurant and carb-loaded, before walking in the light rain back to Lincoln Center to get ready for the show. Meredith took great care with her makeup for Act 1 where she played one of the adult party goers, but that scene went by fast. It was Snow she was worried about, as she quickly got out of her ballgown and slid into the delicate white tutu – it wasn't quite a platter tutu like the lead, but her shorter romantic tutu defined her as a soloist. Lizzie was pinning her tiara onto her head as she swept sparkly dust onto her cheeks and collarbones, adding pale blush eyeshadow to enhance her eyes. When she stood up she looked in front of the mirror; pointe shoes were already on, sticking out under her sparkly tutu and she smiled. She was back in her element as Amelia fluffed out her tutu, Lexie rushing up and standing in the doorway.

"Mer! We only have five mintues! Amelia, come on, you have the pas!" she cried out, and the three girls ran up to the stage just in time. Meredith took a dip in the rosin box and stood in the front wing, the wing she was supposed to come out of, as Lexie dipped in next and hugged Meredith.

"Merde!" she told her, before running behind the stage to the other wing across from her.

Meredith looked around and found Amelia and Owen in another wing, and squeezed them both tightly.

"Merde, sister," she smiled at Amelia, who would always be one of her favorite people. Amelia burst into a smile and hugged her close.

"Merde! I never thought I'd be dancing here, and I owe you everything, she told her, their tutu's smashing together. The music started and Owen led Amelia onstage, and Meredith watched the romantic scene, her hands clutched over her heart. She felt someone behind her and she looked up to see Derek, dressed in his pants for Arabian. He wrapped his arms around her as he watched his baby sister dance with what he assumed would be her future husband, and suddenly the music was changing and Meredith was shaking him off, waving goodbye as she was bourreing onto the stage with a smile, twirling around and throwing two fistfuls of the fake snow in the air, sparkling on the stage. Everyone in the audience knew of the Grey sisters, and they watched the girls lead the dance as more snowflakes jumped and soared onto the stage until there were 20 girls on the stage, plus Amelia as their queen. Meredith suddenly knew she was no longer in Pacific Northwest Ballet, anymore.

* * *

Intermission was a good way to get the fake snow out of everything; her hair, down her costume, and her skin was coated with it. She slipped into her Arabian costume; it consisted of a pair of blush, gauzey pants that were delicately embroidered and beaded but didn't constrict her movement, and a matching crop top that had drapes on her arms that were held in place with elastic bands at her elbows and wrists. She wore an elaborate grown with a flowing veil in the back, and as she tested the strength of her pointe shoes, she felt beautiful. Derek's costume were simply gauzey, beaded and embroidered pants in a darker color, and as the lights flashed backstage, signaling the end of intermission, she ran up to the wigs to meet him.

"You look stunning," he smiled at her, catching her hands as she practiced a turn in the costume; he caught her by the waist and held her ten feet off the ground, a position she was used to being in. The angels were on now, playing Clara and the Prince into the land of sweets, and Lizzie was dismissing the angels and welcoming the Act II dancers into her world. Meredith and Derek ran on and bowed to Lizzie, Clara – or really, her name was Rachel, and the Prince, before running back off. But it seemed like no time at all that they were slinking on stage for their dance.

Arabian was the one slow and sensual dance of the entire ballet. Meredith was on pointe and Derek was shirtless, and with the two of them married, the choreographer had taken the liberty to work with that. They had come up with a beautiful dance full of lifts, closeness, and sensuality that Meredith had fallen in love with, and they both danced their hearts out – even Lizzie was more impressed with her little brother and his tiny wife, who was a force of nature.

After their dance they slunk off the stage again in typical Arabian fashion, and Meredith was pleased with how they did, celebrating as she got into her fluffy Waltz costume. It was a pink pepto bismal leotard with three layers of different colored pink tulle for the skirt, her now-dirty pink pointe shoes sticking out the bottom. She, Lexie, Maggie, and Maggies friend Gisele posed for a picture that Derek took, while Amelia stood by in her Marzipan costume, rolling her eyes.

"Oh come on Amelia, you wish you were part of the Waltz Squad," Maggie teased her, sticking out her tongue as Ameila rolled her eyes and ran back upstairs for Marzipan, while the Waltz girls stuck around for a few more minutes, fluffing up their tutu's and giggling. On their way to the stage, Meredith grabbed Lexie's hand and smiled.

"I'm really, really glad you're my sister, Lex, and I get to dance with you every day," she smiled, before the girls took their spots in their opposite wings again. Mother ginger finished and the opening strains of Waltz of the Flowers started and the girls stepped out into a pose, starting the dance as all twenty dances formed a flower that the Dew Drop Fairy stepped into. The dance went off without a hitch and soon they hit their final pose; Derek grabbing Meredith and supporting her from behind. There were only four men in the dance plus a man for Dew Drop, and Meredith and Lexie got lucky with Mark and Derek. They ran off stage so Lizzie as Sugar Plum could do the next few dance and suddenly they were doing the finale and it was all over.

Meredith was amazing by how the ballet had flown by, and she was washing out her hair and styling it, redoing her makeup into something that didn't look comical and slipping into a black strapless silk and tulle dress to mingle with the audience. She rolled her wet hair up into a pretty style and pinned it how she liked it, slipping her wedding rings back on and putting her feet into a pair of heels. Liz and Amelia dressed accordingly and soon they were in the main reception hall, mingling with everyone and waiting for the men. Kevin, as always, was lurking around the room, making sure his patrons were happy and his ballerinas were pleased. He came up to the girls with a smile, and Meredith smile up at him happily.

"Ladies..Elizabeth, Amelia, Meredith. Spectacular job tonight, you're all beautiful up there." Meredith was tight lipped and smiled as she drank her glass of wine.

"Just wait until you see the plans I have for you all for spring," he smiled, before moving on. Meredith relaxed a bit, glad she didn't have to talk to him. It wasn't that she minded him, she just hated how hard a bargain she'd driven when coming here and feeling like she was on a constant trial basis.

Mark, Owen, Derek, Lexie, and Maggie stumbled out next and found them, and Meredith whipped around to find Derek's arms. She had survived opening night of American Ballet Theater's Nutcracker and she had survived it in one piece.

* * *

 **Ahhh this ended up being over 3000 words, oops! I hope you liked it! I try to switch Nutcracker up every time but it gets so boring every time even though I have to do it! It's a staple of every year ;)**


	39. Pizzicato

Christmas was the same as always, with the exception of having a 45 minute drive instead of a 6 hour flight. Meredith enjoyed being able to go home to her own bed and fall asleep after drinking a million glasses of wine, despite having to get up and do a few more Nutcrackers before they were off all of January. The only thing that deviated from the norm was Nancy, who was nearing her mid-forties and announced her retirement from the San Francisco Ballet. She felt it was time to be with her four kids and husband full time. Meredith on the other hand couldn't believe she had four kids and was a full time principal ballerina.

Normally Meredith and Derek would head off on some adventure somewhere; she wanted to take a few weeks and travel across Europe, but Lexie was begging her to stay and help her plan her summer wedding. With a sigh, Meredith looked longingly at Derek before she looked back at her younger sister, resigning herself to wedding planning this hiatus.

"Fine, Lex, but Derek and I are going away for a month before your wedding in compromise," she said, standing her ground, and Derek nodded seriously behind her.

"Fiiiiiine," Lexie said, plopping down on the couch with her computer and Meredith sighed, grabbing her own computer and sitting next to her, a place she would occupy every day for the next month.

* * *

Mer was relieved when they got back into the studios; standing at her spot at the barre swathed in warm-ups felt right to her; it had been her life since she was three. The big names no longer intimidated her after fall and winter season, and she even offered smiles at them that were returned. She was one of the younger principal dancers in the company but she was respected; she had earned that respect through dancing well and bringing the company a good name. She was too eager, however, to see what Kevin had in store for the magnificent seven, and as they went across the floor in grande allegro, she felt antsy, like she was crawling out of her skin, to run out of the studio and see the casting list.

Unfortunately they had a pas de deux class, which she giggled her way through because Derek kept whispering dirty things in her ear whenever her head was near his lips, and when she was lifted high above his head she would remember those things and start giggling. Needless to say, pas class that day was not productive for the two of them, but they didn't really need a refresher course, except for maybe the new poses they were being taught. Kevin walked around the room, examining each couple.

"I hope that all of you are taking a piece of this with you; it's going to be used in the choreography some of you will be learning," he said, standing right in front of Meredith and Derek as Meredith tightened her muscles and held her majestic pose, before Derek tossed her in the air and dipped her in a swan dive.

"Impressive, Mr. Shepherd, Miss Grey. I hope you can replicate it in several ballets you may be cast in," he teased them, and Meredith's eyes widened. She wanted a juicy role at ABT, she wanted to prove to the world she was more than just Ellis Grey's daughter. Finally Pas class was done, and Meredith couldn't take it anymore. She ran out of the studio but there was already a crowd around the cork board, and she pouted. Amelia pushed her way through the crowd, her eyes shining.

"I'm one of three cast in Raymonda," she smiled, pushing her dark hair back into her bun.

"And a soloist in Paquita and Giselle!" she grinned, throwing her arms around Mer.

"Do you know what I am?" she asked frantically, pushing into the crowd.

"I doooo, but you have to see for yourself," she smirked, before heading back into the studio. Mer grunted a little and pushed more, before she was finally at the front. There were three lists, one for each ballet. Under Paquita, she saw her name for the lead, Paquita, and her eyes flew open. It was one of her favorite ballets and one she'd never danced before. Her eyes moved to Giselle, and once again found her name under the lead, with two other principals. Hardly daring to breathe, her eyes moved to the Raymonda list and…she found her name under the lead. What was Kevin doing? Was he setting her up to fail? Or did he really have that much faith in her, dancing almost every night? Turning around, she fled to her dressing room, needing a moment to herself, slamming the door behind her.

Three lead roles, in three huge ballets. She was 22 years old, how was she going to do this? Looking down at her dirty, worn out pointe shoes – a remenant from Nutcracker that still had life in them – she realized she was shaking. She had no choice but to do this and show everyone what she was truly made of. She could fail and run away from ballet or she could face it head on and succeed, showing the world that she was extraordinary. After a small panic attack, she chose to do the latter.

* * *

Rehearsal didn't start until the next day, and Meredith was learning her lead roles with more senior principal ballerinas, which intimidated her. They stood in a line in front of the mirror, following Julie as she taught them the dances to Paquita, without the pas de deux's, and Meredith was enjoying herself as she danced alongside Misty Copleland and Amelia, two women she greatly admired and was in awe of, but as she danced she noticed that she was just as good as they were, twirling around in their practice tutu's. Derek peeked into the studio, watching her hold her own in rehearsal, rehearsing the classic steps that were originally choreographed in the 1800's and he smiled warmly, before Mark and Owen tugged him into one of the other studio's to learn the men's parts, but really, he could watch his wife all day.

Every day they switched ballet's until the leads knew their solo parts. Once that was finished, they moved on to the Pas, each couple taking their turn rehearsing while the other two watched, taking note of everything and making small corrections of their own. Meredith was always nervous dancing in front of Misty and sometimes Amelia, but it turned out she didn't need to be. She and Derek held their own, bringing their own spark to the three different ballets – Meredith was younger than the two women by 4 and 10 years respectively, and danced everything with the youth she still clung on to at nearly 23 years old. She was good. No, she was better than good. She was near-perfect. Near, because no dancer was ever perfect. They spent their entire lives rehearsing and refining their craft.

Once the leads had their roles and the pas down, it was finally brought together with the corps and soloists and suddenly they had three full ballets to rehearse to near-perfection, with three different lead couples. For whatever reason Meredith and Derek were first-cast for all three, Misty and Marcelo were third, and Amelia and Cory were second. Meredith was shocked, her eyes wide as Kevin passed by her and Derek with a smile and she smiled back, Derek lowering her back down to the floor.

* * *

Inbetween rehearsals, Meredith found herself in the costume room, getting measured and fit into costumes for all three roles. For Paquita and Raymonda she wore stiff, classical tutu's, but for Giselle she wore a long, floaty romantic tutu. Her Raymonda tutu was white with beautiful gold accents and light white puffs for sleeves; for Paquita her tutu was black and red with gold accents and she was in love. Coppelia was different; it was more of a village girls look, with a full romantic skirt, a corset-like top, and a white leotard with puffed sleeves. It was pretty and she loved it, feelling comfortable in it. She had no idea where anyone else was until Lexie and Amelia waltzed in to get fit for their own costumes. Amelia's costumes were almost the same as hers, but since Lexie was only a soloist hers were completely different.

"Congrats on being first cast," Amelia said with a smile, hugging her tightly.

"You aren't mad?" Mereidth asked, worming her way out of her Coppelia costume and handing it back to the dresser

"Why would I be mad? Kevin technically recruited you, you just negotiated the rest of us. I'm pleased I got cast in the lead as well," she smiled, as she was handed a tutu to try on for Raymonda. Meredith pulled back on her leotard, damp with sweat, and smiled back at her.

"I'm proud of us. It's been four years and we've come far," she smiled, before turning to leave the costume room and head back upstairs to rehearsal.

* * *

Kevin had chosen Paquita to be their opening night show, and as Meredith sat in front of her mirror, she was having a minor panic attack. She was less than an hour from taking the stage in her first principal role at ABT and she was freaking out. Doing her makeup was calming; it was something that had calmed her since she had started doing her own makeup – it was a ritual, almost, the way she did it. Foundation, eyeliner, eyeshadow, contouring, blush, pancaking, false eyelashes, lipstick. It took her the better part of 45 mintues, and then she was being fastened into her tutu, her sisters watching with excitement as she was transformed, headpiece fastened onto her head. Once she was ready she picked up her pointe shoes and went up to the stage, something she had been doing almost ten years now, putting them on next to the rosin box and taking her place in the wings. Her sisters crowded around her; Amelia, Lexie, Maggie, and Lizzie, all of them holding onto her hands.

As the opening sounds of the orchestra strung of the beginning tune of the ballet, Meredith felt terror running through her. This was her chance to show everyone that she was principal material. ABT was a completely different ballgame than PNB. Suddenly it was her queue and she heard the yells of 'merde!' as she ran onto stage and struck her pose to the applause of the audience, a smile on her face. From then on her mind was blank except for the ballet, nailing every step, feeling Derek's hands on her waist as she was lifted into the air, gazing into his eyes and smiling back at him.

Without realizing It, suddenly two hours and an intermission had passed and they were all taking their bows, flowers scattering the stage in front of her. She couldn't stop smiling as she curtsied several times, before moving back as the curtain fell in front of her. She couldn't believe she had done it, and to her knowledge she hadn't messed up once. Blinking a few times, she turned around and Derek and her sisters were there, all five of them wrapping her in a huge hug.

"We're so proud of you!" they shriekd, Derek grabbing her and picking her up, tossing her over his shoulder.

"Ahhh, ma petite ballerina," he grinned, twirling her around a few times before carrying her to her dressing room as she giggled, placing her on the worn couch. She was sweaty, her feet were swollen, and her makeup was running but she didn't care. She had to get dressed in something nice and do the meet and greet thing, they all did, but right now she was indescribably happy.

"Der, go get changed, meet me back here. I have to do something with my hair and makeup," she smiled, locking him in a kiss. Tonight they were getting drunk; screw being hungover for company class. Pushing him out the door she turned around to face her sisters, all of whom decided to get dressed in here.

"I'm taking a shower, I don't care who joins me," she said, shimmying out of her tutu and unpinning her headpiece, cutting herself out of her pointe shoes and throwing them at the ever-growing pile of dead shoes they'd started in one corner. She was just in a thong and pair of tights but she no longer cared who saw her naked as she grabbed a clean towel and headed for the attached bathroom.

* * *

An hour later Meredith was ready, her hair in an elegant chignon and dressed in a tight black cocktail dress swollen feet somehow in a pair of black pumps. Derek was waiting at the door in a suit as she slipped on her wedding rings and she slid her hand into his, heading out to the lobby with their four sisters and Mark and Owen following. She hated this part but as the star of the show, she had to.

Kevin spotted her right away and led her and Derek over to the people he was talking with with a huge smile.

"Here she is, this is Meredith Grey and her husband Derek Shepherd, our stars tonight. I snatched them away from Pacific Northwest and I'm quite glad I did, they're both major assets to ABT. Meredith is one of our youngest principal ballerinas at 22; she's the youngest in history at Pacific Northwest. What were you, nineteen?" he asked her, and Meredith plastered a smile on her face.

"Yes I was nineteen, I was promoted to soloist after my first Nutcracker with them. My mother is Ellis Grey," she said boldly. She never used her mother to get her ahead but she knew her mother still held honor and clout.

"Oh is she?" the elderly woman asked with a smile.

"You look just like her. How is she doing these days? I remember seeing her when she was young and training in Boston.." Meredith forced a smile and nodded.

"She's taking some time off, she's living here in New York and writing her memoir," she forced out, her grip on Derek's hand becoming deathlike.

The rest of the evening was more of that, before the patrons trickled out the door and the dancers were allowed to leave.

"I need several drinks," Meredith whined, as she gathered up her dirty things, slipping into her coat and scarf and they excited the Metropolitan Opera House in search of a cab to take the seven of them for food and drinks. They ended up in Hells Kitchen, where food and drink were always plentiful, and Meredith immediately ordered three shots of tequila to sate her before food was ordered.

Once everyone had food and drink, and Meredith was pleasantly tipsy, they once again found cabs uptown to their apartment on Central Park West where they ended up drinking more, well into the night. Meredith was the first to fall asleep, curled into Derek's chest, and he smirked at the rest of them, before picking her up and carrying her upstairs to their room. There were some things even prima ballerinas couldn't outlast.

* * *

 **Meredith finally had her big break and it went well! And Amelia gets hers too! Does anyone want to see anything happen in upcoming chapters?**


	40. He Dreams of Dulcinea

Spring season with ABT was one of the best Meredith had ever had. Dancing almost every night was exhilarating and amazing for her career; some nights she was too tired and worn out to dance and Amelia or Misty would take over, but she danced nearly every night with high praise in reviews and from the audience. They loved her and she loved her job, flying across the stage be it in leap or held in Derek's arms. She was 22 years old and in the prime of her career, on a massive high from dancing. Moving from PNB to ABT made her happier than ever and she was glad she had chosen wisely for herself and the rest of the seven. She could tell they were all happier as well, being trained the way they were and focusing on their technique.

Closing night was fun with Meredith's last Raymanda show, taking her final bow with Derek and stepping back so the curtain fell, all members of the company hugging her tightly and congratulating her on such an amazing season. She was on cloud nine, despite having danced almost every night from February until May, but she was pleased with herself. If the ballet greats surrounding her thought she had done a great job, she had done a great job.

Smiling, she headed back to her dressing room like she usually did, Amelia unfastening her tutu as she washed her face of all the makeup, transforming back into a normal girl. She threw on the sundress she wore into the studio that morning, not disturbing her hair, and she packed up her theater case. It was the end of the season and before she and Derek could go on an adventure somewhere, they had Lexie's wedding the first week of June.

* * *

Lexie and Mark's wedding was the first week of June; it was simple and elegant, held in a small chapel in the city with the reception in Central Park. She wore a simple white tea length dress that was strapless with a chiffon overlay; Maggie, Meredith, Molly, and Amelia wore short cocktail-length pink dresses, with pink roses, white Lexie held white roses.

The ceremony was short, with select few from the company invited, but the entire company was invited to the reception. Meredith danced the night way with Derek, remembering their own wedding a few years ago when she was 20 – she was now almost 23.

* * *

For their hiatus they'd decided to travel to Argentina, and their first stop was Buenos Aires the first week of July. Derek, always the adventurer, insisted on going to Patagonia next after a few days stay, wanting to see the mountains and go on an adventure. Meredith was less than please but she would do whatever he wanted to make him happy.

Buenos Aires was gorgeous if not cold, but she didn't care as they explored all the city had to offer. Meredith knew no Spanish and Derek's was iffy, but somehow they got around. The wine was amazing, the food was even better, and Meredith didn't want to leave the city for snow and cold.

Luckily the night before they were supposed to leave they started throwing up. Not that she had planned it and not like she was enjoying it. Laying down on the cold tile of their hotel room, Derek sat with her, stroking her sweaty skin and holding back her hair when she needed it. She figured it was just food poisoning from being in a new country and it would be out of her system by morning.

Morning came and as they packed up their things to head to the airport, Meredith still felt sick. Clad in leggings, a long sleeved shirt and her fleece, she was dizzy and queasy and had to sit down on the bed.

"Der I want to stay here," she whined, laying back. He looked up from his suitcase and looked at her; she looked pale and listless curled up on her side on the bed. He sighed and got up, laying down next to her as he felt her head. She wasn't warm, she just looked sick.

"Mer, love, what's going on?" he asked her and she frowned.

"I'm nauseous all the time, the sound of food makes me want to vomit, and I just feel weak," she told him, closing her eyes. She was exhausted and she just wanted to lay here forever. Suddenly Derek sat up and laughed.

"Meredith, when was your last period?" he asked her, and her eyes flickered open.

"I don't know…I don't get it every month because of my weight and ballet," she shrugged listlessly. He sighed and bit his lip.

"Give me ten minutes and I'll be back, okay?" he said, throwing a blanket over her. She nodded slightly and closed her eyes; if she didn't the room would start spinning out of control.

* * *

Half an hour later, Derek returned to the hotel room with saltines, ginger candies some ginger ale with pieces of ginger in the bottom, and a pregnancy test, rousing Meredith from the fitful sleep she had fallen into.

"Mer, get up, I need you to get up and drink this," he said, Meredith sleepily sitting up, rubbing at her eyes in a haze.

"Nooo I need to sleep Der," she whined, as he handed her the bottle of ginger ale. She drank some, making faces the whole time but she managed to get the whole bottle down. Standing in front of her Derek looked at her, biting his lip before holding out the pregnancy test to her. She stared at it before speaking.

"I am 23. I AM 23. I cannot have a baby, Der, I'm still a child myself," she said, tears forming in her eyes. Sure she'd been on her own since she was 15, joining the Royal and then moving to Seattle, meeting Derek then taking a huge leap and moving to New York, but right now she felt very much a child. She was worldly but at the same time she was restricted to life inside ABT and Lincoln Center. Her mother didn't know who she was and she barely saw her father, not like they cared much for each other, and right now she was that 15 year old girl again, terrified and not knowing what to do.

"I can't have a baby. I can't step away from ballet," she whispered, looking up at Derek as she openly sobbed, feeling nauseous again. In the next moment she pushed past him to the bathroom, leaning over the toilet. Derek felt horrible, knowing that if she was pregnant she would resent him forever. He could hear her crying inbetween retching and he sat down, looking at his phone, not knowing what to do with his crying wife.

After a few moments he knocked on the door and let himself in; she was laying on the floor again, fully dressed, using her fleece for a pillow.

"Mer…" he said, and she picked up her head, motioning him over. He sat against the wall, laying her head in his lap and raked his fingers through his hair.

"Mer…If you are it's not the end of the world. You could dance through Nutcracker, Nancy always did. And then sit out spring season, dance all summer and regain your strength and body, and come back for fall season," he said. She was quiet, her breath even and steady, before she turned her head to look at him.

"It's not that I don't want one. It's just…timing. Kevin is going to kill me."

"We don't even know if you are," he said gently, kissing her protectively on the forehead. The test was in his pocket and he slipped it out, placing it next to her.

"Take it when you're ready. It's just a test. I know it determines our future, but Mer, I love you, and babies are going to happen eventually. It just helps you're nine years younger than I am," he teased her lightly, and she managed to crack a smile as he left the bathroom.

* * *

Meredith continued to lay on the bathroom floor, feeling sick, weighing her pros and cons. Pro, she could take some months off of ballet and rest up, spending time with their baby and doing some serious bonding time. Cons, though; there were so many cons to this. She would miss ballet so much, and as a junior principal ballerina, she would miss out on the juiciest roles. She was at the beginning of her stride, at the beginning of being handed the best roles, and getting pregnant would mess all of that up. It would show to Kevin that she wasn't ready to be serious about this, if she carelessly got pregnant.

Forcing herself off the bathroom floor, she fumbled with the box – the directions were in Spanish but she wasn't stupid, she knew how a pregnancy text worked. Peeing on the stick, she set it on a piece of toilet paper and set that on the sink, sitting on the toilet seat lid and waiting the requisite three minutes. Finally she turned over the stick, to find out it was negative.

"DER" she yelled, before throwing up again. She officially had a stomach bug now. Derek came running into the bathroom to hold her hair back and finally she collapsed back into his arms.

"I'm not pregnant, so I either ate something or I have a bug from traveling," she whined, and he gathered up her small form with a small smile. He wasn't going to lie; he was slightly disappointed that she wasn't pregnant, but he had seen and heard the way she cried about it – he wasn't going to bring a child into the world that she wasn't prepared for. They would have a baby when she was ready.

* * *

It took a few days for Meredith to regain her strength, but the pair made it down to Patagonia where Meredith delighted in snow in July, running after Derek with snowballs and jumping on his bad, tackling him to the ground. They were staying in a gorgeous lodge in a valley surrounded by mountains on three sides and Meredith couldn't believe how beautiful it was. They did something new every day – skiing, hiking, camping for a few days, whale watch down by the coast, rock climb. She was amazed when she realized how sheltered her life had been, inside the cushy, shining world of ballet and glamorous tutu's. One day they were curled up on a rock, watching penguins feed on the beach and she sighed contently, burying her cold nose into her fleece neck warmer and she smiled up at Derek. She looked and felt so out of her element but she knew she had never been happier than she had been at this moment, and suddenly she knew she lived for hiatus and for exploring the rest of the world from a backpackers point of view.

"Since when did you start doing this?" she asked him in a quiet voice, curled up in his arms in her heavy layers. He looked down at her with a smile, her face free from makeup and her hair pulled back in an easy braid.

"Mark and I started trekking around the world when we turned 18 and it was kind of our thing. But now we're both married and you and I both know Lexie will never do it," he laughed, and she had to laugh with him. Meredith might be girly and be used to the splendor of ornate tutu's and satin pointe shoes, but she could also adapt to change and situations, and she was loving this so far.

"I don't want to go back to New York, I say we join the Colon Theater Ballet and stay here because Argentina is beautiful," she said simply with a smile. Even with Derek dragging her around the rugged terrain of Patagonia, she never wanted to leave.

* * *

Coming back to NYC after a month in Buenos Aires and Patagonia sucked. The oppressive heat was insane and Meredith was miserable as they made their way back to their apartment from Penn Station. Steam rose off the pavement and it made her wish for the cold and snow of Patagonia, of running after Derek and tackling him into the cold wetness, of the pure white of the snow, untouched by the dirt of the city. Bringing their things into the bedroom she sat on the edge of the bed and sighed, glaring at her theater case, at the shoes and tights falling out, knowing on Monday her second season with ABT began. She could only wonder what it meant for her.

* * *

 **So I wrote something for this other than ballet! I want Meredith to have a baby but not until she's older and has been a principal dancer for awhile - most dancers wait until they're at least 30 and in this she's only 23. Like I said I want this to last at least 100 chapters so we have a lot to go through and there WILL be a pregnancy ;) Don't worry Patsy!**

 **Also, it seems i'm hitting the 40th chapter with ALL my fics! So happy 40th chapter to this one too! It'll be awhile before I hit it with Someone Like You :P**


	41. Andante Dolce

Heading back to the barre was always difficult after hiatus, but this one was especially hard – Meredith and Derek had made more promises to see the world and she was already aching for it to be Nutcracker season, when the casting lists for fall season hadn't even gone up yet. Throwing on warmups over her leotard, she stood at the barre in front of Derek and behind Lexie like she usually did, yawning every step of the way. Julie was teaching company class today and she came up next to Meredith with a stern face.

"Meredith would you like to go back to bed? We can gladly fill your position." Meredith blushed, embarrassed, and shook her head.

"No Mistress Kent," she sputtered, whipping herself around in a soutenou turn so she was now facing the back of Derek's head, her cheeks bright red. She could hear Lexie giggling loudly behind her and she kicked in a grande battement, hearing her pointe shoed foot collide with her sister's face as she turned her head and glared at her. She didn't care if she was newly married or not – don't laugh at the principal ballerina.

Pas was next, as usual, and Mer didn't feel rusty luckily, from days of photoshooting around Buenos Aires and Patagonia, giggling in the snow as they took photos and set up their cameras to take impressive photos of themselves, rehearsing in snow covered landscapes and on mountaintops. As she did ten pirouettes with Derek helping to rotate her, she closed her eyes and wished she was back in Argentina, her back leg extending in an attitude before she dipped down to the floor in a penche, her legs 180 degrees.

"Lovely, Meredith," Julie said as she passed, Derek righting her and dipping her backward as Meredith smiled confidently. At 23 she was a principal at ABT and nothing could bring her down from her dancing high.

* * *

After Pas they were dismissed to look at the board, and Meredith held her breath. Odette/Odile. Cinderella. Dark Angel in Serenade. Dances at a Gathering. Turning Girl in Who Cares?, and Tchaikofsky's Grand Pas. What a huge honor, to be given the Grand Pas. She was filled with roles and she held her breath as she turned from the board, waiting for people to start the rumor mill, to say that she didn't deserve it but she had nothing but support from the principals and soloists, and the corps girls that were jealous beyond belief. She smiled politely at them and thanked them, before running around to find Derek. She already knew he was her partner in all of these; he was always her partner in crime. It was rare she was placed with another male because she and Derek knew each other so well – they knew how the other danced, they anticipated movement, and they danced beautifully together. Finding him in one of the smaller studios she smiled, watching him practice his turns from the doorway before he noticed her.

"And?" he asked her and she shrugged her shoulders. She wore a black leotard with pink tights and a black skirt, hair tied up in a bun and black legwarmers scrunched around her ankles, dirty pointe shoes with little life to them on her feet.

"Swan lake, Cinderella, and some Balanchine ballets," she shrugged, and he smiled at her, kissing the top of her head.

"I'm proud of you," he said, knowing she didn't have to say it to know she'd gotten the lead and she blushed modestly, shrugging her shoulders again.

"I'm afraid one day the rest of the principals are going to snap at me and hate me for coming in and getting the good roles," she said as she looked up to him.

"Mer, no one would dare. You're just as good as they are and they're at least ten years older than you. You're still proving to the world that you're not going anywhere, you're only 23. Some of them were principals when you were in their country and did the same thing you are, you have nothing to worry about. Besides, there's a second cast for everything," she smiled, pulling her into his arms.

"Yeah, Amelia is second cast for Cinderella with Owen, and Isabella is second cast for Swan Lake. But they chose me for both. And I have no idea how," she said, practically floating over to the windows that looked over 8th and Broadway, her home away from home. She was here 8 hours a day, six days a week, and at Lincoln Center for several hours every day as well. She spent more time here and at the Opera House than at her own apartment. Sighing, she lifted a leg onto the barre and stretched deeply over it, breathing into the stretch and feeling the familiar tug of her hamstring, pushing herself deeper before lifting her leg off the barre and sliding into a split easily, stretching her body over her leg. Derek watched her, watched her stretch, knowing how dedicated she was and always had been to her craft, taking discreet photo of his tiny dancer.

* * *

Meredith knew most of Swan Lake already so the dove in deep and she danced like crazy that day, killing her pointe shoes and having to switch halfway. The covered the first act and by the time they were finished, she fled to the dressing room to take off her pointe shoes, knowing they were filled with blood. She made a face but she wasn't disgusted as she cleaned up the blood, wiping it away with tissues and pieces of gauze, bandaging her toes up so they were clean when she changed into her blue floral dress, letting her hair down from it's tight bun. She slid her bandaged feet into flip flops and tossed her heavy dance bag over her shoulder, heading out of the principals dressing room to meet Derek before going home.

"Hey," she smiled, shaking out her hair, still a paler blonde from standing on mountaintops and he smiled, drawing her into a kiss before looking down at her feet and frowning.

"Mer…" he said and she shrugged her shoulders, skipping down the stairs of the studio with a roll of her eyes.

"I've been on pointe for 13 years, Der, it comes with the territory. Sorry your wife has ugly feet," she giggled as she burst out into the fresh air, the sun setting over the river to the west. She started heading towards their favorite restaurant and he laughed, tugging on her bag and laughing.

"Where are you going, missy? I'm taking you home and making you dinner with the rest of them have to stay," he smirked, lifting her into his arms and she laughed as he hailed a cab and the two of them piled in.

"64 West Central Park," he told the driver and she relaxed against the seat, looking over at him before she moved across the gap and locked him in a kiss.

"Has it really been three years since we married?" she asked him between kisses, and he smiled at her, wrapping her tightly in his arms, their bags on the floor.

"Yes, and I still can't believe you're my wife. You're beautiful and perfect and you're nine years younger than me but we work," he smiled, running his fingers through her hair, still damp from putting it up earlier.

"Hey, Mark is 12 years older than Lexie and they work," she smirked, scrunching up her nose as their cab slowly made its way uptown in dinnertime traffic but she didn't care. This was their time to be alone for a little bit, before anyone else arrived home and she savored it. Living with five other dancers tended to be chaos, especially since one room had been converted into a home studio for if they needed to practice anything more.

* * *

Back at home, Meredith hopped in the shower while Derek made dinner for them – shrimp scampi in a white wine sauce. She floated down the stairs in shorts and a loose tank top, her wet hair hanging down her back as she sat down at the kitchen table, Derek handing her a glass of wine as she dug into her dinner.

"It's delicious," she smiled across the table, her hair curling up, dripping down her back as she sipped her wine.

"It makes me wish we were still in Argentina. Where should we go over winter hiatus?" she asked, thoughtful. She was tired of safe vacations to normal places like London or Paris. Adventure vacations were so much more fun she had learned.

"We should go to Thailand, it's next on my list," he smiled, blue eyes shining across the table.

"It's our list now," she smirked, twirling her pasta around on her fork, giggling a bit.

"Our list," he corrected himself, taking the back of her hand and bringing it to his lips.

* * *

 **So funny story, every time I try and watch Swan Lake (I actually have an ABT dvd of it hahaha with Gillian Murphy and I forget Seigfried) I fall asleep but I've been in it and it's amazing! So is Cinderella, cause most of the first act is simply Cinderella and it's amazing! I encourage everyone to watch the ballets I write about Also, I think I'll write in her having a baby when she's 25; she'll be 24 at the end of Spring Season, so a few more to go!**


	42. The Autumn Fairy

The season wasn't an easy one for Meredith. Swan Lake was physically demanding, dancing two roles every night she danced, with Odile being the harder of the two, and they tired her out, wearing out her ankles and knees. Her impressive 32 fouettes, with doubles and triples thrown in, always wowed the crowds, and her Pas' with Derek were the things of legends, going up on the company YouTube channel for the entire world to watch, but she was exhausted.

Cinderella was much less demanding on her; even though she was on stage most of the time, the first act was much easier on her feet as she wasn't in pointe shoes for the first scene, and did more folk/character dancing instead or stood in the background. In the second scene she was on pointe, and from then on she was a goner. Watching the stepmother and stepsisters, played by men, dance en pointe was always amusing to her, she had no idea how they found the strength. She had a long variation after they left for the ball, before the fairy godmother arrived, that was killer on her already busted and broken toes. When the fairy godmother finally did come out, she danced in her peasant dress among the fairies, until finally she was carried to the coach and did a quick change while the animals and fairies danced their dance.

Meredith always stood in the wings and watched the ballroom scene, watched her friends and family as members of the court dancing as she rested slightly waiting for her cue. She giggled as the step mother and step sisters made their comical entrance, loving every second of this ballet. She secretly loved the step sisters dances but she loved Cinderella more. She watched Derek dancing with a smile, hidden behind a wing, watching him come into his own in the company.

Then, it was time for Meredith to make her entrance, in a crystalized white romantic tutu, where she was practically drowned in glitter and rhinestones, but of course she had to be. The costume was absolutely gorgeous and she loved it. Ultimately, the prince was immediately besotted by her and Derek took her hand and they danced, her eyes shining bright as she looked up at him before she was snatched away by the other courtiers. Such was the ballet retelling of Cinderella – no Disney film would ever show that, she laughed to herself as she danced, sometimes wrapped around the middle of one of her male friends, before ultimately being returned to Derek. They became a part of the great ballroom scene, waltzing along with the rest of the dancers and she sighed happily, knowing that dance was where she was meant to be.

After the ballroom scene was their pas de deux and Meredith melted, as usual, into Derek's arms. It was like the whole ballet was just a stand in for her pas scenes with him, and she loved the Cinderella pas, especially with such grand sets behind them to set the scene. She executed 16 perfect fouettes before the striking of midnight broke her and she went into terror mode, as her coach and horses transformed back to a pumpkin and field mice and she was transformed back to her ordinary self and she left a single pointe shoe on the stage as she ran off to change into another pair.

* * *

During intermission, she thought about how different their version was compared to Disney's. Certainly more comical. More complicated. Getting out of a costume and into another while on a stage was no small fete, and taking off a pointe shoe at that.

It seemed like no time at all she was back onstage as Peasant Ella, dancing her little dance of happiness, waltzing around her attic bedroom with a smile on her face with her solitary 'glass slipper'. Soon enough, the Prince and his guard were searching all the girls in the kingdom to see if their foot fit into the shoe, and last but not least, it fit Cinderella's foot perfectly. He kissed her and they danced, before she ran off to change into Cinderella's wedding gown where they danced the wedding Pas. There were a few more steps, but finally they took their ending poses and let the applause fill their ears as they were called for bows over and over again, feeling a rush as always.

* * *

Cinderella and Swan Lake were always enthralling; dancing the famous ballets always were. But it were the smaller ballets that Meredith loved the most, the ones Balanchine had choreographed for NYCB and his handpicked dancers, the ones that had been placed into the Balanchine trust and companies had to pay to use the title and choreography. She had danced Serenade so many times she could dance the corps role in her sleep, but she had only danced a principal role once. Being given Dark Angel was such an honor to her, and as she executed the steps of the 30-minute ballet, not once able to rest but instead running on and off stage at crazy speeds, partnering with Derek, twirling, leaping at death defying speeds and heights, sweat pouring off her body, and then falling into final formation with the rest of the dancers as the Waltz Girl was carried off, she felt a part of something larger than herself, something that Balanchine ballets always made her feel.

In Dances at a Gathering, Meredith was Pink Girl, a role that was innocent and youthful and she loved it, the slow, elegant steps and her pas de deux with Derek. It melted seamlessly into a pas de trois with Mark and Lexie, and then it was a pas de cinq with Mark, Owen, Derek, and Lexie, as Blue Girl, the five of them dancing in sync with the complicated footwork to the strains of Mozart. Meredith found it weird dancing with Mark and Owen, but she was just so used to her relationship with Derek, both on and off stage. Eventually Amelia joined the five of them as Purple Girl, dancing with Owen as Lexie danced with Derek and Meredith danced with Mark. It felt forever odd to her but it was funny in a way, swapping husbands and partners as they danced their role, running offstage as Lizzie ran on in hers. After Lizzie's Pas, Lexie, Meredith, and Amelia ran back on for another variation, the two Grey sisters waltzing and giggling together before eventually the trio formed a straight line, dancing in sync with such fluidity and beauty it was hard to look away. Meredith loved dancing with them in this ballet; she knew the audience knew they were sisters and it showed how close they were on stage. There were just so many parts and variations with different people that Meredith lost count; at one point it was her, Lexie, and Lizzie with the men, but at no point did she stop loving what she was doing, even though she was on stage almost constantly for nearly an hour.

Who Cares? Was another Balanchine ballet that Meredith loved; she danced the highly sought after role of the turning girl. She always felt the ballet very Broadway styled and felt like she should be in character shoes and doing high kicks instead of grande battements en pointe in her show-girly costume but she loved it anyway; it was so peppy and exciting to be a part of. The jazzy music was a fun change to the classical music that was the soundtrack to her life, and she loved her short black dress trimmed in red sequins. It was also Maggie's first ballet where she had been given a soloist role, and Meredith was over the moon with happiness for her. Meredith had both a pas de deux and her solo role of turning girl, where she changed into a red costume and she and Derek did their thing, and she showed the world just how well she could turn, really.

But her real test was Tchaikovsky's Grand Pas De Deux. It was performed every season by a different partnering duo, and this season she and Derek had been picked. She knew every step of the romantic pas but agonized over it every day in rehearsals before they took to the stage every night. She wore a pale pink dress, with Derek in light grey, and on the nights they danced Balanchine, the audience held their breath, watching the couple embrace each other time and time again as if it was their last, melting in each other's grasp, Meredith held high above the stage in just one of Derek's hands, trusting him completely. It was those nights where Meredith felt alive, like no one else could take her hopes and dreams from her.

* * *

 **This ended up being much more descriptive than I intended it to be: I sat and watched every ballet I wrote about so I could get an idea of the steps and the movement for the chapter and I'm glad I did. I didn't care for the version of Cinderella I watched to be honest, but you should all watch Dances at a Gathering! It's so much fun to watch, and I can only imagine it's intense to dance. I've danced Who Cares? Before and its so much fun! Anyway I can only hope some of my readers like my descriptiveness as much as I do ;)**


	43. Tempo Di Marcia Viva

The fall season went wonderfully, with Meredith rising even more. The more famous principal members regarded her with respect when they brushed by her in the halls and she found herself walking taller whenever she headed into the studio, taking her place at the barre and doing the familiar steps and taking the familiar positions she had since she was a little girl. Part of her wished her mother could see her now, see the woman she was turning into, the dancer she had become. Those were the days she hid in the shadows at the back of the dance studio and let her demons take over her mind; the days she came home from class and drowned herself in tequila.

* * *

They were given a week off at the end of October, and then Nutcracker casting went up. Meredith didn't expect anything huge, but as she pushed past the crowd to the list her eyes lit up. She was dancing Clara. Her heart fluttered a few times and she blinked. At 23 and as a principal ballerina, she was dancing Clara. She knew she looked younger and Kevin always complimented on her youth and how young she really did look, but could she pull off playing a child? The last time she was Clara, she had only been 19 years old – four years ago, she realized, right before she had married Derek. Everyone stared at her as she walked away from the casting list and into the women's dressing room to get her water – she hadn't seen any of the other casting, but she heard a small scream that sounded like Amelia, and suddenly she felt arms around her.

"I got Sugar Plum!" she heard in her ear, and she turned around with a smile to face Amelia.

"Congratulations! I'm sure everyone hates us since Liz was Sugar Plum last year," she laughed, redoing her bun and sticking hairpins back in, tying a white ribbon around it to make it pretty. She turned around and plucked her leotard off her sweaty body, wiping the sweat off her forehead.

"At least it's you and not someone we hate," she smirked, not really caring who heard her at this point. Everyone either liked them or hated them, it was as simple as that. She glanced at herself in the mirror and smiled slightly; she had lost weight as she got older and she and Amelia had very tiny, balletic forms – skinny and flat-chested, something everyone wanted.

"Well guess I have rehearsal now," Meredith said, adjusting the ribbons on her pointe shoes, knowing she had a crazy couple of weeks ahead of her before Nutcracker opened, as always.

* * *

Standing in the studio, they started from the beginning. The choreography was different from PNB; it was harder and the steps were quicker, but she started the same, running onto the stage and pantomiming peeking through a keyhole to an elaborately decorated parlor, her younger brother Fritz, played by a corps boy named Connor who looked like he was 8. Meredith regarded him and she instantly decided she didn't like him; good. He was playing her annoying little brother, she didn't have to like him. When the pretend scene went up and she played amongst the presents, which were really just their dance bags and debris, before their 'parents' came out, played by senior principal members and tugged them away to join the rest of the party. She still wondered in her head if she was too old and then shrugged it off; she looked young and companies wanted experienced dancers who looked younger.

They went through the party scene and onto the battle scene, which Meredith danced with the apprenctices, corps, and soloists boys as the mice, rats, and soldiers, before she fainted and was carried off to the forest where the Nutcracker Prince woke her up and they walked off stage and Lexie and Mark, the Snow King and Queen, had their Pas. Meredith watched her little sister, who was now taller than her and looked older than she did, dance the beautiful dance, a piece she'd longed to dance for years, before the snowflakes started rehearsal. Meredith and Derek were added in, skirting in and out of the flakes and often dancing along with their steps. By now she knew everyone in the company and it was fun, mimicking them with Derek, twirling on the toes of her pointe shoes through the flakes before she mimed departing in a sleigh. She was exhausted and they had only learned the Act I choreography today, as Julie told them it was a wrap and to go home.

* * *

Derek waited until Meredith came out of the locker room, dressed in leggings and a tunic, her coat and scarf thrown over her arm as she lugged her worn-out dance bag with her, pointe shoes spilling over.

"Hey," he said to her with a smile, and he swooped down at her with a kiss.

"Hi," she smiled back, shrugging on her coat and scarf.

"We're going out to dinner to celebrate," he said, taking her hand and leading her down the narrow staircase that led outside the ABT studios and she laughed.

"Derek, if we celebrated every time one of us landed a coveted role we'd always be celebrating," she smiled in the cold air. It was early November but it tasted of winter and she loved it; she loved living in New York and feeling like she was in the center of the world, in the middle of it all, really.

"So? You're Clara at American Ballet Theater, that means a lot," he teased her as they started walking towards their favorite restaurant. She was sweaty and her hair was slicked back into a bun with gel and hairspray but she shrugged it off as they slipped into a corner of their favorite restaurant and celebrated with dinner and plenty of wine.

* * *

They rehearsed through all of November, and opened December 1st to a packed audience. Meredith was nervous; this was only her second Nutcracker with ABT and her first as a leading role. Her costume was a thing of beauty; it was a beautiful pale blue dress with a sweeping skirt, sleeves trimmed in ribbons and ruffles with a full petticoat underneath and plenty of room for the audience to see her feet. A blue sash tied around her waist and her blonde hair cascaded down her back in thick, glossy curls as she stood in the wings, waiting for her musical cue. Once it came, she skipped onto the stage and never looked back until after the party scene, where she had to strip naked in the wings into Clara's nightgown and rush back onto the stage quickly after.

Her mind blanked out as she danced every step beautifully, sitting with Amelia – the Sugar Plum Fairy – and Derek as Act II ran it's course, until suddenly she was dancing with Derek, and then they were watching Amelia and Owen. She would kill to dance Sugar Plum. Next year, she supposed.

* * *

 **Again, I'm so sorry I'm taking forever to update! Been so tired and sick but I'm doing it I swear even if it takes a bit!**


	44. Largo

After Nutcracker came January hiatus, and Meredith and Derek were quick to take advantage of it. He had asked her where she wanted go go over Christmas, and finally after New Years she had made her decision. Italy. They were spending a month in Italy, spending time in Venice, Florence, Rome, Tuscany, Naples, and Verona. She was pleased with where they were going and she knew they'd have a great time. She figured for summer, they could go on another adventure.

On New Years Day, she spent the entire day packing, hoping she didn't forget anything. Dresses, pants, sweaters, underwear, bras, socks, shirts…her packing list was endless. She threw in a leotard and tights along with a pair of pointe shoes just in case, knowing that wherever she and Derek went, they ended up dancing with a ballet company. They were well-known around the world, and welcome to dance with any company.

She had trouble sleeping that night; she was too excited to get to Italy. Tossing and turning, she finally fell asleep around 3 am, knowing she had to be awake at 6.

When her alarm went off at 6, she popped right up, starting to get ready for the long flight. She pulled on her favorite leggings and a soft, comfortable sweater, letting her hair fall in waves down her back. Derek begrudgingly woke up, taking forever to get ready; by the time he was ready she was already downstairs eating something light for breakfast, her bags by the front door. Derek came downstairs in a grumpy mood and Meredith silently passed him a cup of coffee, made up the way he liked it. He kissed her forehead in thanks and she gave him a smile as she finished up her bowl of cereal, sticking her bowl in the dishwasher.

"Come on sleepy, our flight is in three hours," she said, wrapping her arms around him from behind and placing a kiss on his cheek.

* * *

They got to the airport in record time; the city was still waking up. JFK however was already crowded, with people going home no doubt, but they were headed for the international terminal. Meredith was exhausted and couldn't wait to fall asleep on the plane, but first they had to tackle the long security line.

She stood in line and sighed, leaning against Derek and closing her eyes as they moved slowly through the line, finally getting to the front. She threw her things on the belt, pulling off her shoes and tossing them in a bin before walking through the metal detector. She was waiting for it to go off, knowing it would be just her luck, but she breezed through and started to collect her things, shoving her feet back into her boots and grabbing her carry-ons and her coat, waiting patiently for Derek. It was only when she felt his hand in hers again that she smiled up at him and they made their way to their gate with plenty of time to spare.

* * *

Meredith quickly fell asleep on the plane, curled up next to Derek in their first class seats, sleeping for most of the flight and waking up ¾ of the way through. She had the window seat and she watched the world go by as Derek continued to sleep before they touched down in Venice, a city she had always wanted to visit. Ages-old buildings, gondolas, delicious food – she couldn't wait.

It wasn't long before the wheels of the plane came down and Meredith had her face glued to the window; Derek stirred beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"So, do you like what you see so far?" he whispered to her, and she turned to him with a smile.

"Bit rainy, but it looks beautiful," she grinned, leaning in for a kiss as the plane touched down at the airport. She was excited and couldn't wait to get to the hotel, change, and explore the city.

* * *

After going through customs and getting their bags, the pair exited the airport and grabbed a water taxi to their hotel. Meredith popped out first as Derek and a bellhop handled their bags, striding into the opulent lobby. She wandered around as Derek checked in, wishing her knowledge of Italian was more than just basic, hello, how are you, goodbye. Soon they had their room keys and were traveling upstairs, and in a few more minutes she had kicked off her shoes and was sprawled across the bed. She had no idea what time it was but she was exhausted; the sun was setting but she was starving.

"Come on Mer, change for dinner. We'll just go to the restaurant downstairs," he told her and she sighed, sitting up and making a face. She didn't want to do anything really, but she changed into a floral mini dress with long sleeves and a pair of heels, brushing out her hair and twisting it back, adding jewelry. She wasn't pleased with her hair, but that was what happened when you spent every day with it pulled back and she didn't ever have to bother with it.

Derek popped up in dress pants and a dress shirt, buttoning his cuffs and he smiled at her, catching her around her slim waist.

"You look gorgeous," he smiled, locking her in a kiss. She couldn't help but smile, knowing she had just him, and only him, for an entire month, and all of Italy. She grabbed her coat in case they ended up wandering around the area and he grabbed her hand as they left the room, heading downstairs.

* * *

Dinner ended up being great, full of authentic Italian food, and afterwards the pair took a walk along the canal. Meredith was freezing but it felt refreshing, Derek's arm around her as they took everything in.

"I hate so sound so snotty and privileged, but I feel lucky we have a job where we have time off to travel," she said, blushing slightly. He laughed, squeezing her hand tightly as they walked, leaning in to kiss her.

"I just can't wait to explore tomorrow," Derek smiled, squeezing her hand as they turned around to head back to the hotel. They ended back upstairs in their room and got ready for bed, Meredith finding herself wrapped up in him, knowing she could sleep as long as she wanted to for the first time in months.

* * *

 **First chapter of them on vacation in Italy! I'm debating compressing it all into one chapter or having each city be one chapter. Hmmm. And should they take a ballet class with a company in one city? Thoughts!**


	45. Ritual of the Ancestors

Italy was perfect. Despite the cold. Meredith loved sneaking down narrow passageways, and once she even convinced Derek into a romantic gondola ride with her. More than that though, she loved the rich history of the city, which was absolutely everywhere, and the delicious foods. Yes, Italy was definitely treating her well. Even without Derek at her side, she loved exploring everything; the city was so old and so beautiful, it enchanted every part of her.

One morning she found herself wandering in St. Marks Square, her hands clinging to a hot cup of coffee as she started up at St. Marks Basilica and she couldn't help but smile; she had grown up in Europe but the architecture here was so different compared to France. It was breathtaking in it's own, perfect way. Eventually Derek joined her and they grabbed a boat down the Grand Canal to explore to explore the Piazza San Marco, and for that day they were lost in history.

The day ended at the elegant Caffe Florian, with some of the most delicious food she had ever eaten in her travels around the world. She was all dressed up in one of her favorite dresses and Derek wore a button down and tie, and they both never wanted to end.

Of course, the next morning, they had to wake up and catch a train bound for Milan, where they were taking class the next day with La Scala Theatre Ballet. They were always dancing wherever they went. It was a 4 hour and 40 minute train ride to Milan, and once they were in their compartment Meredith promptly fell asleep.

* * *

When the train pulled into Milan, Meredith had her face plastered to the window. Who wouldn't want to be in the fashion capital of the world? The city itself was gorgeous as was their hotel, and Meredith was thrilled to be there. After they left their things at the hotel, they grabbed their dance things and made their way to La Scala where they were greeted with great applause and Meredith smiled. She had always wanted to be one of those famous ballerinas, a famous prima, and suddenly now, she was.

The head of the company came over to them, smiling.

"You two must dance with our company tonight! We're doing Swan Lake and we would love you to do Seifried and Odette/Odile, we use your same choreography."

Meredith and Derek looked at each other, eyes wide. The chance to dance with an Italian company?

"We would very much love to," Meredith smiled, in broken Italian, and she squeezed Derek's hand, before they slipped into the studio and she put on her pointe shoes, glad she had thrown everything into her suitcase. She had stars in her eyes as she did the ceccheti style of ballet at the barre, so different from the vaganova style she had been taught since she was three, but she was able to keep up.

Later that evening was a dream though. The girl she was replacing for the night was nothing but nice, and helped her adjust the costume for how tiny Meredith was, and put her headpieces on perfectly. The two women chatted in English and laughed and joked about being principal ballerinas at how young they were; she promised to watch Meredith from the audience. Mer was so used to ABT' costumes but this costume was gorgeous, her Odette one. So much embroidery and sparkle to it; she felt like a princess as she went to the stage in her pointe shoes, watching Derek in the first act before she went on in Act II. She could tell he was stunned by her transformation, even though he'd seen her in this role so many times. Perhaps it was the costume but she never knew; he never told her.

The rest of Milan was amazing. Meredith had never been a huge shopper, but suddenly she was drawn to the designer boutiques, wanting to spend everything she had on beautiful shirts, perfectly fitting jeans, and ornate evening gowns that she knew she'd be able to wear to galas for ABT. Derek teased her as she ran from store to store, trying things on, coming out with some things, but she loved it. She was in the fashion capital of the world and it was absolutely perfect.

* * *

After Milan they went to Verona, only to relive their days as Romeo and Juliet. They toured the city in search of Juliet's balcony, and Meredith pouted when they couldn't re-enact their famous scene together, but she knew they wouldn't be able to. It was still pretty cool to her, though.

From Verona they went to Florence, which was warmer than Milan and Venice, something she enjoyed. There were so many museums and art galleries in the city and the pair were determined to see all of them as well as all of the gorgeous buildings that were in the city. Again, Meredith was in awe of Italian architechture as they walked around the beautiful Florentine city, snapping photos wherever they went, not caring how much of a tourist she looked like.

After Florence came Rome, which was such a huge city to make their way through and they spent as much time there as they possibly could – they had allotted a week there.

On the first day, Meredith insisted on throwing coins into the Trevi Fountain, making endless wishes over her shoulder. The same day, they visited the Collussiem and the Arch of Rome, two breathtaking buildings that Meredith loved. Somehow they had ended up as tourists without meaning to; they saw all of Rome in a week and still had Naples.

* * *

Naples flew by and before long they were in England; Meredith wanted to check up on the house there. They popped into the Royal again and the company crowded around them, especially Meredith, who would've risen through the ranks by now already, especially under her mother. They begged her to perform with them and she sighed; she wanted to but more than anything she wanted to watch, so that night she watched from the wings, watching the people she grew up with perform 'A Winter's Tale'. She smiled as she watched them, having no regrets.

Later that night, she and Derek hopped a flight back to New York, and by 9 AM they were stumbling off the plane at JFK. They'd been gone a month and had to be back at ABT in a few days, but as they made their way home and up to their room, they had no regrets about anything.

* * *

 **Yay another chapter! So glad I'm feeling a bit better and can bang these out ;) Next up? Dreams on Fire!**


	46. Sick note

I wanted to give an apology to everyone for not updating recently. I have a very severe stomach disease called gastroparesis; I've had it nearly three years but it's extremely progressive and for me, it has progressed to the point where I can no longer have solid food. As you know, a person requires food to sustain life and have energy, and because I can't have food I have limited energy for things. Some days I can't get out of bed, some days I can only make it to the room next to mine; some days I have more energy than others. It varies.

I AM NOT ABANDONING MY WORK AND CHARACTERS. I have put so much work and love into my stories and I would never do that to them, or to you. I am simply saying that it may be awhile between updates, and for that I am incredibly sorry because I miss the days where I'd update every single story and make all of you smile. I'm doing the best that I can and I hope you don't abandon me because we still have a long journey ahead of us together.

Xx Emilia


	47. Hello again!

Hey everyone! I've missed all of you SO MUCH and I think I'm finally healthy enough to return to writing/updating fics for all of you! So much has happened in my life, I've lost so much, but in return I've gained so much more. Here's what's happened since I last posted a note:

I lost 35 pounds due to my gastroparesis, and as an already tiny, almost underweight person, it shoved me under the edge to severely underweight. But I'll return to that in a bit.

I had surgery on my stomach, a procedure called a pyloryplasty, to cut open the muscle that forces your stomach to contract every 2-3 minutes and helps food pass through. Now, when/if I eat, my food flows freely through and it's easier for my food to digest – which helps a lot, because we learned through a stomach emptying test that my food digests slowly, at a mere 12%. My digestive system is failing but it still works, albeit slowly.

So, last time I posted, I was barely able to eat, and was losing weight rapidly. I had no energy which is why I had to step back from writing, because my brain simply couldn't handle it anymore. I was so upset I couldn't write for you guys! When I went in for surgery, I weighed 101 pounds. I was in the hospital for 5 days after my surgery, and recovered quickly. However, 36 hours after being at home, I couldn't stop throwing up the 1/4th of a smoothie I had managed to drink, and I was admitted to the ICU at the hospital. They put in an NG (nasal-gastric) drainage tube in my nose going into my stomach, because there was a blockage in my stomach going into my small bowel (gross, right?) and I was diagnosed with something called SMA syndrome. Basically, I had lost too much weight in too little time, and a major artery had lost fatty tissue and simply collapsed on top of the area where the stomach meets the small bowel.

I was transported to the hospital where my GI doctor and surgeon were, and placed in THEIR ICU, and was on so much pain medication every hour just to make myself slightly more comfortable. Nothing helped with the pain. A few days later they placed what's called a GJ tube in my stomach, the G portion drains your stomach if it's backed up and you feel sick, and the J portion goes into your jejunum and is where you get feeds. It was a disaster from the start, with the J portion clogging straight away. It decided to stay clogged, no matter how hard they tried to unclog it (it would get unclogged for a few hours, and the next time they went to use it for feedings, medicine, etc, it would be clogged again.) So that was a disaster but after 22 days in the hospital, I got sent home on 9/8 – a day before my 27th birthday!

I luckily got to be home for my birthday, even if my birthday cake had to be brought up to me at my bedside because I was too sick and in too much pain to go downstairs, but I was surrounded by my parents, siblings, and nieces and nephews. However, the following Monday I landed myself in the ER with vomiting and severe pain, and was released Tuesday. Being so strong-willed, I made it to my classes Wednesday! My professors were impressed with how resilient I am, and proud of me. I should note that this entire time, the head of my dance program was doing everything she could to make sure that I could complete the semester, even though I came back 3 weeks into the semester. I seriously love this woman, and owe her so much. She is so determined and so caring, and emailed or texted me every single day that I was in the hospital and kept my spirits up, and is even allowing me to choreograph two dances this semester! One is a group piece and one is a solo, showcasing my 15 year struggle with anorexia. So far both pieces are going great!

So the Thursday after my birthday, I went and had my fourth endoscopy of the year, where I got the GJ tube out, and they placed a PICC line in my left arm. A PICC line is just a fancy term for a permanent IV/central line; if everything goes right with it you can have them for months or years. I began on TPN feedings, or total parenteral nutrition, which I carried around in a backpack while it infused and disconnected when it was time to dance. I needed to gain and reach 110 pounds; my lowest weight I had reached was 93. I'm currently 102, because unfortunately yesterday we discovered that my PICC had become infected, and it had to be pulled out. My GI doctor decided that I didn't need another one, and of course I'm losing weight like crazy, and my life is just one giant mess.

It doesn't help that I received two more diagnoses this past week: dysautonomia and POTS, which go hand in hand. Dysautonomia means that nerves in my briain don't send proper signals to places in my body, causing things to go wrong, which could be an explanation for my brittle diabetes, my gastroparesis, my severe migraines, and many other things. POTS stands for posterior orthostatic tachycardia syndrome, which basically means I have severe tachycardia. My resting heartrate when I'm sitting or lying down is usually in the 120's or 130's. For a normal person, their resting heartrate is usually around 90`100. When I dance it can go up into the 170's. which is dangerous but I've been given no restrictions which I'm happy about, but we'll see what a more specialized cardio tells me.

Throughout all of this I'm trying to stay positive and move on and be happy about this. I'm planning a trip to Disney with my best friend for spring break, and I'm going to NYC this weekend for comic con. I'm trying to live my life without limits, the way that chronically ill people try to live, because for now my only limit is my racing heartbeat and the way my body constantly feels like crap. But hopefully as I see doctors, things will slowly be explained and medication will be able to help me.

Either way, like I said, I'm definitely ready to come back and write more chapters for you guys! I've missed these characters so much and I've missed writing for you, and making you guys happy.

Look out for new chapters in ALL of my stories in this upcoming week!

XX Emilia


	48. Strength and Honor

Spring season at ABT seemed to be filled to the brim. Meredith was cast as the lead in Le Corsaire, and she knew she was in for a challenge. She had done a variation from the ballet for Youth America Grand Prix when she was 16 – and had won top prize, which was a scholarship to any ballet school of her choice. Of course, she had chosen the Royal, then had become an apprentice a year later…she sighed, reading the rest of the casting list. Swan Lake, Sleeping Beauty, Carmen, The Four Temperaments, Jewels again as well as Serenade...the list seemed never ending as she was called to learn some of the most challenging roles in her career. She had danced Odette/Odile before, as well as Aurora, but this was different choreography. Much more demanding, much more intricate and delicate. In Serenade she was Waltz Girl again and she sighed; she had been hoping for one of the darker roles, and one morning as she came in for class, she stopped in Kevin's doorway. After a few moments of waiting he picked up his head.

"Meredith, hi," he said with a smile, and she smiled politely back, her hands crossed in front of her, her heavy dance bag hanging from one shoulder. Always the polite girl who grew up in France and England, she drew in a deep breath.

"I was hoping to be cast as Dark Angel again, I've been dancing Waltz Girl for years, since I became a soloist at PNB," she said simply, although she didn't want to come off as ungrateful either. He sighed, folding his hands on his desk.

"We considered you heavily for Dark Angel again, Miss Grey, but despite your seniority and talent, we felt you a bit too pure for the maturity of the role," he stated, and Meredith flinched. She was still seen as the innocent child, the sweet and pure one despite being married for several years now. Sighing, she turned her back and heading into the dressing room, slamming her bag down on the ground next to Amelia, who looked up at her with a glare.

"You okay?" she asked her, and Meredith sighed, pulling off her leggings and shirt and pulling on warm ups, finding a pair of canvas technique slippers that her big toe hadn't put a hole through yet. Finding a pair of pointe shoes, she grabbed them and the padding she used in her shoes, along with a roll of tape, and headed into the studio for barre. Amelia followed her, grabbing her arm.

"Apparently, I'm not allowed to have heavier roles because I'm still the sweet, innocent one," she spat out, lifting her leg to her ear and hearing a satisfying crack in her hip, which was tight. Amelia stared right back at her, before realizing.

"Oh, because you're Waltz Girl still? It took forever for Webber to give me jucier roles, I practically had to harass the man into giving me my first Dark Angel role. It'll come, just take everything in stride and be pleased with what you have," she smiled, pulling her hair back neatly into a bun, before taking her place at the barre. The piano began to play and Meredith sighed, plieing in time to the music.

"Yeah but I've danced Dark Angel before, was I not good enough?" she whined, melding into tendues with a small sigh,

* * *

Le Corsaire was always one of the more elaborate and expensive ballets, and this production was no exception. As Meredith stepped into the costume room and was handed a tutu, her eyes went wide. Shed worn the gorgeous feathered concoctions for Swan lake before, but these bejeweled and sequined tutus and tops and bottoms were absolutely stunning. She tried on one after the other, the costume lady nothing where to take each one in for her small frame, and she delighted in joy as she stood in front of the three way mirror, watching herself. She had certainly arrived at last, rising in fame and rank to a senior corps members this season. Le Corsaire was so demanding but beautiful and as she learned each step she couldn't wait to perform it on stage.

Opening night came too soon and she was jittery, watching the men dance on the pirate ship and Derek's entrance before hers came. She took a deep breath and leaping onstage in her first costume, a coral colored romantic tutu and with a fan, playing the mysterious Medora, who enchants them all. The ballet had three acts and was tiring, but she loved every moment of it.

* * *

Spring season was going with such full force, Meredith didn't even realize when she missed her period. She often did because of her lower weight that she didn't think twice about it, and went to class as usual. A few weeks later though, she woke up with cramping in her abdomen and sighed, figuring she had gotten her period. She grabbed a tampon and went on with her day, getting to the studio with everyone else. To her though, the tampon hurt too much and she quickly replaced it with a pad, something she hated but figured it was necessary. She went back to class and joined in with adagio, getting hyped up for grande allegro as they went across the floor.

By pas class, she knew something was wrong. Cramps were ripping across her abdomen, and at one point she pulled away from Derek and bent over at the waist, trying to catch her breath.

"Meredith are you okay?" he asked her, and she shooed him away.

"Stomach bug, or something," she said, heading over to her bag and downing some advil and pepto bismal, but when she tried to get back up she was dizzy, with black spots floating in her vision. She felt a stickiness between her legs and looked down at the red spot on her pink tights. That was the last thing she remembered before she hit the floor with a thud.

* * *

When she came to, she was laying in a bed in the ER. Derek sat beside her and she could hear Amelia and Lexie talking outside the room. She turned her head slightly; she was hooked up to fluids and she was woozy in part from pain medication. She looked over to Derek, aching to say his name, but nothing came to her throat. She was still in pain, her legs still felt gross, and she groaned, closing her eyes again.

The second time she came to, her head was clearer but the pain was worse. A doctor was talking to Derek, and she could hear the words 'miscarriage' and '8 weeks' and her heart sank. She had been pregnant. She had lost the baby. She rolled into a ball under the blankets before Derek noticed her, reaching for her hand.

"Mer..Mer you're okay," he reassured her, lifting her chin to find her face stained with tears.

"I was pregnant and I didn't know it," she sobbed. In that moment, she hadn't realized she had wanted a baby, and now it was gone.

"I know, sweetheart, I know," she said, his own face drawn and upset. He kissed her forehead and pulled her close to him, before climbing onto the narrow bed with her.

"It's going to be okay. They have to do a DNC to get everything out, and you have to rest for a few weeks, but then you can go back to dance. Don't worry about the baby, we can have another one." She nodded slightly, only comforted a bit, closing her eyes again as a nurse came in and gave her more pain medication. She fell asleep in a drug induced haze, before the took her away for the DNC.

* * *

After the minor procedure, she woke up in a hospital room, still on pain medicine. She was pale and withdrawn; Derek sat in an armchair next to her, asleep. She sighed, touching her stomach, where nothing was anymore. There had been a baby there; but she wondered how could she mourn something that she didn't know she had? It was strange to think about. She sighed and tried to go back to sleep; it was only 6 am, but she knew the doctors would be on rounds soon.

She managed to fall back asleep and sleep through rounds, and was discharged later that day, with strict instructions to be on bedrest for a few days and have liquids and some soft foods, as her stomach tolerated them. She was miserable, crying every so often for the lost baby, hating that everyone in the company knew what had happened.

* * *

Finally when she returned to the studio after the ordeal, it was to polite applause. She ignored it and stood at the barre, rigid and cold, until the music started. _Plie, straight. Plie, straight._ And thus started the routine, until the end of the season. Her stained tights and leotard were long gone, ripped to pieces and at the bottom of a dumpster somewhere.

* * *

 **So my first new chapter after being gone for so long! I wanted something dramatic to finally happy so it did. I hope you all enjoy, and look out for more chapters! Hope you're all enjoying season 13 so far! I'm so mad about Omelia right now!**


	49. Lullaby

The rest of the season went by smoothly. No one said a word to her about the miscarriage, and Meredith dared them to. She went through the motions of dancing, feeling harder than before after her experience. Her dancing became better, filled with emotion, not going unnoticed by Kevin. One day in the studio as she was stretching out her middle splits, he came up behind her, bending over to whisper in her ear.

"Tonight you and Amelia are switching roles. You're going to be dancing Dark Angel, and she'll be dancing Waltz Girl." The hairs on the back of her neck prickled up and her eyes went wide as the hair on the back of her neck prickled up. Apparently her now dark and twisty miscarriage had earned her the right to dance Dark Angel.

Later on in rehearsal, as she and Derek danced their parts, as he carried her high above his head in a beautiful back bend, the entire company watched her with bated breath. Every girl wanted to be her, and Amelia smiled proudly as she watched her sister in law and older brother from her position in the two diamonds.

That night Meredith was also in The Four Temperaments, and the lead in Moves, but it was her role as Dark Angel that got her written about in The New York Times. She had gained an edge, one that would stick with her. She gave a small smirk as she read the review the next morning, getting ready for class.

* * *

Closing the spring season was Jewels, and this time Meredith and Derek were the lead in Diamonds, sometime Meredith had never done. Dressed in an elaborate white and gold tutu, she gazed at herself in the mirror with bated breath as Lizzie pinned the even more elaborate tiara onto her head. Testing her pointe shoes she smiled; her trusty Russians were always great on her. 5 minutes to stage was called and she headed upstairs, watching Lizzie as the lead in Emeralds, and Amelia and Owen as the leads in Rubies. Then it was time for her and Derek to debut themselves for the first time in Diamonds. The dance was decidedly Russian Vaganova style, sometime Meredith had come to love – it was so different from what she had grown up with in England. Plus she knew her mother was somewhere out in the house, watching her now adult daughter kill it with American Ballet Theater, something she had always wanted.

As the curtain opened and they started dancing, Meredith couldn't stop smiling her perpetual smile, despite the pain in her toes and ankles from dancing every night from January until now, May, but she loved it, each time Derek lifted her, carrying her from spot to spot, whipping her around in multiple pirouettes only to dip her low in a fish dive. The choreography was beautiful and it was the perfect end to the spring season.

Taking their bows at the end of the show was wonderful; Meredith stood beside her two sisters in law with her husband, receiving several standing ovations. She had a perma-smile on her face as she curtsied again and again, and finally the curtain fell. Derek couldn't help but take a picture on his phone of his wife and sisters, Maggie and Lexie squeezing in, and Meredith couldn't remember a time when she had felt more loved.

* * *

Over summer break, everyone had their own plans, but Meredith and Derek had been invited to dance with the Australian Ballet. She had jumped at the chance; they were leaving with a week. It was their summer, but Australia's winter season. As a guest artist, they were being fit right into the company's repertoire. It was nice, getting asked to do all of these guest roles. Meredith was cast in La Bayadere, A Midsummers Night Dream, Cinderella, and she and Derek had of course been asked to do Romeo and Juliet, which made her laugh. She was no longer that youthful breath of fresh air that had originated Juliet when she was 18, but she was happy to play the youthful teenager again.

Packing was fun; it wasn't freezing cold so she went wild with pretty skirts and dresses, carefully packing an arsenal of leotards, tights, and pointe shoes. By the end of May she and Derek were boarding their long flight to Sydney, Meredith curled up in her seat in first class and tried falling asleep for the 36 hour flight.

Upon arriving in Sydney, she was still sleepy and bleary-eyed, confused by the time difference and leaning on Derek as they collected their bags and made their way to find a cab that would take them to the house they were renting.

Once they were there, Meredith was delighted to find that it was on the beach, and she couldn't help but smile as she unpacked. They were due at the studios later that day, but for now she was happy with the beach being in their backyard. Derek came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and giving her a kiss.

"So I don't think our time here will be too terrible," he teased her, and she smiled. They had the beach feet from their backdoor, and from their front door they could see the opera house, where they would be performing every night. No, their life here would be pretty great, with everything at their fingertips. Summer/winter in Sydney was going to be great.

* * *

 **So I'm so sorry it took me forever to get another chapter up! Still struggling with my health but it's getting better. Hoping to update all my fanfics tonight and tomorrow Updating the Omelia ballet next since I love it! Then I'll do more MerDer ones, ballet is just crazy on my mind because I miss it so damn much and I go back to dance the 17th! Anyway, read and review! I hope you like it 3**


	50. Foxtrot For Orchestra

Australia was absolutely beautiful, Meredith couldn't deny that. Inbetween rehearsals and performances, she and Derek were exploring as much of the city that they could, which was breathtaking. However, there wasn't much time inbetween rehearsals and performances; they had practically taken up residence at the Sydney Opera House. She had also gained a huge addiction to Tim Tams, and decided she needed them as a staple back at ABT. She simply couldn't live without the delicious chocolate biscuits.

It started out simple enough, she gained five pounds. No big deal, she was underweight anyway and eating more than one pack a day. She told herself she needed the calories. Her leotards still fit the same and her dancing wasn't any different. Derek didn't notice that she had gained weight either, so it didn't bother her. Besides, her clothes fit the same anyway.

A couple weeks after arriving to Australia, though, she woke up with a queasy stomach. It was still early, around 6:30 in the morning, and her mind immediately wandered to what she had eaten the night before – spicy curry. Maybe it just wasn't sitting well in her stomach. Rolling out of bed, she sprinted to the bathroom, sitting down on the cool tiles with her head resting on the porcelain of the toilet, a hand on her stomach as she tried not to heave. She spent the next half hour like that, her eyes closed, until the feeling passed. She took another 15 minutes before she got up and started getting ready for the day, twisting her hair into a bun and slipping back into the bedroom, where Derek was awake. She gave him a weak smile, feeling shaken slightly, as she got dressed in a leotard and tights, slipping a dress on top with a cardigan for the chilly morning weather. All was well, or so she thought.

All day was spent in the studio, in classes and rehearsals, before they migrated over to the opera house. As she was getting dressed in her Odette costume, the nausea came over her once again and she pressed her lips together, knowing if she got sick all over the gorgeous feathered tutu it would be an issue.

"You know, I'll be right back," she said, slipping out of the tutu so she was just in a nude leotard and pristine pink tights, slipping into the private bathroom and falling to her knees just in time to empty the contents of her stomach – everything she'd eaten today – into the toilet. A light sheen of sweat covered her face and she felt so sick; she wanted Derek. Her phone was discarded next to her and she bit her lip, sending him a quick text to come to the bathroom in her dressing room. A few minutes later she heard a knock.

"Mer?" She reached up and unlocked the door, still curled up with her knees to her chest, having flushed the toilet already. He looked down at the state she was in and sat next to her, pulling her into him.

"Mer, what's wrong?" he asked her, and she bit her lip.

"I'm not entirely sure, I woke up this morning and felt sick but it passed, but I just threw up everything I've eaten today. I mean, I feel better stomach wise, but body wise I feel like shit. But I have to go on, it's our debut tonight," she said quietly, her head resting against his chest and her eyes closed. He rubbed her back gently, kissing her forehead.

"I can have someone run out and get you something for nausea but after the performance I'll take you to the hospital okay?" She nodded slightly, not even sure she could get up off the floor, but she had to. He helped her stand up and wash her mouth out, and together they headed back into her dressing room, where she was helped into her costume and headpiece. She was grateful for her makeup, which masked how pale she truly was, and soon she was stage ready as she went upstairs with her pointe shoes, doing her ritual of putting them on by the rosin box, rubbing rosin on the heels, and coating the sole and box with just enough rosin that she wouldn't slip.

Standing in the wings, she watched the first act while waiting for her second act entrance. When it became time to dance she was able to, but her body felt like it was failing her. Despite that, she put on her best performance, dancing like she always did with Derek. The fact that her husband was her partner never went unnoticed by an audience, as she nearly always had a smile on her face when they danced together.

Once the ballet was over, she rushed to her dressing room and hurridly stripped out of her costume, only to rush into the bathroom to vomit again, feeling sicker than last time having held it in. Derek was miraculously there for her, rubbing her back gently in a soothing motion.

"Mer take off your makeup and get your hair out, we're going to the hospital," he told her.

* * *

Once she was ready, Derek called for a car and they headed for the hospital, Meredith's head in his lap. He played with her blonde hair, worried about her, while she closed her eyes and tried to fall asleep, her stomach rolling. Once they were there and in the ER, which was mysteriously empty, they were brought back to a small room and the nurse checked her over. She was still nauseous and somewhat dehydrated, so an IV was started and anti-emetics were pushed while she curled up on the gurney, blankets piled on top of her as they waited for the doctor to come in.

It seemed like hours before a doctor came in and looked her over.

"Mrs. Shepherd, when did you have your last period?" he asked her, and Meredith blushed, trying to remember. She was painfully aware of the last time she had to remember this and shook her head.

"Its irregular, sometimes I get it and sometimes I don't. I'm a ballerina, it's common," she said in defense of herself. The doctor sighed but ordered an ultrasound and pregnancy test with her blood work, which had already been sent off to the lab. She fell back asleep until the nurse came in with the ultrasound, and test results. She opened her eyes slightly with the room spinning around her, fluids still rehydrating her body.

"Mrs. Shepherd, the doctor will be in – ah, here he is," she said, and the doctor came striding in.

"Everything came back normal, although it seems to be that you're pregnant, seven weeks along in fact." Meredith's eyes flew open. It was barely July and she was almost two months pregnant. By December, by Nutcracker, she would be seven, and unable to hide her bump in costumes anymore. She made a strangled sound in her throat; part of her was happy but another part of her would've rather have planned this out with Derek. She felt Derek squeezing her hand, knowing he felt the same emotions she did. Slowly, she nodded her head.

"Okay. I want the ultrasound, then," she swallowed, looking up at Derek and chewing on her lip, scared. She had a feeling they were going to have to cut their tour in Australia short and head back home if she was this sick. Opening up her gown, the nurse started the ultrasound and in a moment or two they could hear the heartbeat filling the room, and her eyes filled with tears. This time the baby was there, the baby was alive. She clung to Derek; there was hope. She gazed at the screen where their baby was a small, pulsating little peanut and she smiled slightly, before looking up at him.

"We're having a little dancer," she smiled as he kissed her forehead, smoothing back her hair.

"I love you, Mer," he told her, squeezing her hand again.

"I love you too," she said softly, before turning back to the screen.

* * *

 **Sooo they're finally having a baby and it's for real this time! I didn't set out to write this chapter for her to be pregnant but it wrote itself and I loved it!**

 **I apologize for not updating my other stories, but for a writer when you have great ideas for one story and feel like you're out of ideas for others, it's easier to keep updating the one that you have ideas for, if that makes sense. So I apologize for disappointing people, but I'm very happy with my Omelia ballet story at the moment and my ideas for it are endless. Again, I'm not abandoning any of my other stories, but my Omelia ballet story just has endless, juicy plotlines for me to write about since it's new and fresh. My MerDer stories have been slowing down for me lately, I'm not sure why, but ideas are starting to come back to me so I ask that you be patient, please.**

 **PS. HAPPY CHAPTER 50!**


	51. Authors Note

AN: Hey guys! Emilia here. I really would love to get back into writing as I miss it! My health is finally doing better and I miss these stories and these storylines like crazy! Do you want me to continue these existing stories or start fresh with new ones? I'm tempted to write Dreams on Fire again, since I'm not happy with the existing version and feel I could do so much better!

Please throw some ideas out there for me! In the meantime, I'm going to try and start updating some things for you amazing people 3


	52. Dance Of The Girls

Luckily, with a few daily doses of anti emetics, and keeping herself as hydrated as possible, Meredith was able to continue their season in Australia. Night after night they danced to sold out audiences, and Meredith couldn't have been happier. The Australian crowd was amazing, as was dancing in the Sydney Opera House every night, but as the weeks went by her bump grew. By the time they were boarding the plane back home, she was already 16 weeks pregnant, carrying small since she herself was so tiny, but none the less she was four months along.

"Kevin's going to kill me. His star dancer pregnant and no longer able to fit in costumes? I'm dead," she said as she settled into her seat on the plane. Sighing, she ran her hand through her ragged, hair-product damaged hair, shaking her head a bit. She was so nervous to return to class and have him see her growing baby bump, knowing she would be out for fall, winter, and spring seasons.

She didn't have to wait long; the day after they arrived home in New York Meredith nervously entered the studio, a long, cozy warm up piled over her leotard to hide her small bump. She wasn't the first company member to get pregnant; Lizzie had had a baby the year before, but she was still nervous nonetheless.

Warmups were to come off after plies, and as Meredith took in her sweater, she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror. Baby bump, front and center. Everyone was staring at her and began to whisper, and she just wanted to run and hide.

* * *

Class went by quickly, and afterwards she was called into Kevin's office.

"Meredith! Congratulations on your pregnancy. I think we'll be able to work around it and let you dance another month or two before letting you go on leave." Meredith quickly smiled; she wasn't ready yet to quit dancing for six whole months.

"Really?" she asked, and he smiled sweetly at her.

"Yes, you know some costumes are more forgiving than others, you can play smaller roles in some of the ballets we have planned fall season.

So she did just that.

* * *

Two months later, at six months pregnant, Meredith took her leave from the company, choosing instead to sit out rehearsals and performances, although she still took class with them everyday to keep up her form. Dancing pregnant was an entirely new thing and she had to adjust her body to it, which was interesting, but she was happy.

In between classes, rehearsals, and performances, she and Derek had started to look for a small apartment of their own, instead of the large communal one they lived in with their extended family.

They finally found a penthouse on the other side of Central Park; 6 bedrooms and baths with numerous amenities they never knew they wanted. It was perfect for the family they had planned for themselves, and over the next few months they slowly moved out of the huge group apartment and into their own quiet one.

The nursery was the most fun to decorate out of the entire three floors of the penthouse, however. Pink walls, with a ballet theme naturally. Meredith had fun finding creative ways to use old pointe shoes to decorate the room, with tiny tutu's decorating the lamps and even one of her first ones framed and hanging above the white crib. It had been a difficult project to take on, decorating the nursery herself while Derek was performing every night, but she was proud how it had turned out. One night over a late dinner, they were discussing names.

"She should have a good, strong name. Something not so common, something pretty," Meredith said with a smile, her hands rubbing smooth circles over her baby bump. Derek smiled back at her, unable to keep from smiling. He loved watching her interact with her bump; he knew how badly she wanted this baby, even though it kept her from dancing.

"We should name her Juliet," she teased him, after all the times she danced the famous role. He let out a laugh and shook his head.

"I like Madelyn, Charlotte, Cecelia, Sophie…"

"Sophie. I like Sophie," she smiled, her green eyes sparkling.

"Sophie Elizabeth, so she can have my middle name," she said, breathing out.

"Sophie Elizabeth Shepherd is beautiful," he said, leaning over and giving him a kiss.

* * *

It was so odd to watch Nutcracker as an outsider. But night after night she sat in the front row of the darkened theater, watching her family and friends dance the roles she knew so well for sold out audiences. It was weird to be able to predict their steps, but she did, sometimes wishing she was up there dancing like she had been doing every year since she was ten. Just one year of a reprieve and then she'd be back to dancing sugar plum most likely, with Derek as her prince.

Nutcracker season went by quickly, though, and soon she was reaching her due date, which made her nervous. She wasn't sure she was ready to have a baby, but everything was set up. Her sisters and the company girls had thrown her a baby shower, and their penthouse was outfitted for everything baby, and suddenly Meredith found herself in the nursery night after night with Braxton Hicks, unable to sleep and sitting in the plush rocker, imagining herself holding Sophie in her arms. Until one night, she woke up, a pain ripping through her stomach.

"Derek, I think it's time," she said to him, and he sat up straight in bed, panic in his eyes. She was calm however, massaging her belly gently as she moved to get up. As she did so, a trickle of water ran down her leg and she turned red.

"I'm just going to change," she sad, slightly embarrassed as she changed into clean underwear, along with leggings and a comfy sweater. The baby bag was packed, as were both of theirs, and soon they were on their way to Mount Sinai, tucked away in the back of a cab. They were going to have their baby!

* * *

 **Sorry for condensing everything into one chapter, I feel like no one is interested in my stories anymore so I figured I'd just condense her pregnancy into one chapter before the birth and moving on to gauge who's still reading and whatnot. Please review! My last two stories didn't get reviews so I have no idea who's reading and who likes things or not anymore**


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